by M. Clarke
“So.”
“So?” Elijah shook his head, and then turned to Alex. “He’ll get it after it’s done.”
“What’s done?” I was so baffled that I followed behind him, still holding on to Josie’s hand. She looked puzzled too, but she didn’t say a word.
I traced my dad’s name with my eyes. Philip Allen Stewart, Jr. He was named after my grandfather. He didn’t like that he had the same name as his dad, so he made sure he didn’t do that to me. I wouldn’t have minded though, I guessed. I didn’t know. What I knew was the lump in my throat that was suddenly there, and my heart was twisted in pain that wasn’t there a second ago. It got worse when Elijah started speaking. What the hell was he doing? And where did the flowers come from?
“Mr. Stewart. Alex and I want to say hello. Sorry it’s been a while—well, since we buried you. My mom and my brother are buried close by, so I thought we’d come by and see you too. You see, I’ve been worried about my friend, your son. He’s been so busy taking care of everything and everyone that I’m afraid he’s going to snap. He hasn’t really had a chance to grieve. Of all the people, he should realize that I know this. I thought coming here would help him feel better even though he tells me he’s fine, but I know he’s not fine. He’s hurting. I know this ‘cause I’m hurting, and his hurt must be a thousand times worse because you are his father, a fantastic father, whom I had the pleasure of being like a son to. So, thank you for that. I wish I could have told you in person, but I know you knew that.”
Elijah sniffled and wiped his tears. “Now it’s your turn.” He walked away with his back toward me. He could see the tears already forming in my eyes.
“Dad,” I choked, trying to think of where to start. I knew what to say when Josie squeezed my hand to let me know she was there for me. “Remember the girl I used to talk about in the sixth grade? She’s mine now. I had to wait all these years, but she’s standing next to me.” I kissed the back of her hand. “You probably know that. You can probably see me…or not. But things are good. Josie is the new manager at Mama Rose. Kevin is managing your auto shop. I’m going to graduate with my MBA this school year. I have an internship with a huge firm Jimmy hooked me up with. Sara is doing well. Simon is calling more often, and Mom even flew to New York. Can you believe that?” I chuckled, and then suddenly tears flowed like crazy. “But I miss you. We all miss you. I didn’t get to tell you that I love you, and to thank you for being the best dad. Why did you have to leave us so soon?”
I couldn’t handle it anymore. I dropped to my knees and sobbed like I never had before. I poured out the hurt, anger, and unfairness in life, but mostly it was from missing my dad. Josie dropped next to me with her arms draped over my back. Her caress brought me back. I held her in my arms, and I cried for her. My poor Josie, who had been through so much no child should have to endure. She was so brave and strong, determined not to be the victim but a survivor.
When I had no tears left to shed, I brought us to a standing position. Wiping her tears and mine, I continued to hold her as the cool wind swept her hair. I inhaled a deep breath, feeling renewed, like I had cleansed myself. Damn Elijah. He was right. I felt so much better. It felt good to let my dad know how I felt, and it felt even better to let all the hurt out that was buried deep inside.
I pulled away from Josie and held her hand, looking for Elijah and Alex. When he noticed I was looking for him, he waved from a distance and lit up with a mischievous smile. He was planning something.
“Seth, I’ll race you to your car. Last one there has to pay for Lexy’s dinner.” Elijah picked up Alex, draping her over his shoulder.
“Elijah, put me down.”
“Oh no, you don’t,” Josie said, but it was too late.
I picked her up the same way and started running. But just before, I turned to my dad’s tombstone and promised to come back. Next time, it would be with the rest of the family.
“That’s not fair. You had a head start,” I hollered. I couldn’t help myself. I loved Josie’s ass and I let her know by giving her my love smack.
CHAPTER 36
Seth
“I freakin’ love my PR company,” Lexy said, taking a bite of her salad. “I hate that I’m away from you guys though.” She pouted.
“It won’t matter where our jobs take us, we’ll always have each other,” Jimmy said, taking a sip of his beer. “At least I get to see Seth, but I don’t know for how long. Have you made up your mind yet?”
I had been offered a job at the firm I was interning at and so had Jimmy. Jimmy had accepted the offer, but I had to talk to Josie about it. “Josie and I decided that it would be best if I took the job and we moved to San Francisco.”
“Really?” Jimmy’s blue eyes glowed happily. “Did you tell Mr. Fletcher?”
“First thing Monday morning. Since Josie will be living with me, I’m going to look for an apartment.”
“Sounds good to me.” Jimmy patted my back.
Lexy slightly bounced on her seat. “That’s perfect. Now we can visit San Francisco and you’ll all have to visit me in New York.” She raised her glass of water. “Let’s toast.” We did as she asked. “To Elijah and Alex’s engagement. To Josie and Seth finally finding each other. To Seth and Jimmy working for one of the biggest firms. To me, being happy at my new job. To our friendship. No matter where we go, no matter what we do, we know we can count on each other. I love you guys.”
“Love you too, Lexy,” Alex cooed.
The males grunted, unable to say “I love you,” but I knew secretly that we all said it in our minds and felt it in our hearts.
Next day
“Why are we here, Seth?” Josie asked, snuggling closer to me with her hands intertwined with mine.
“I thought we’d do some reminiscing. Go back in time.” I headed to our special bench.
“Okay,” Josie giggled, humoring me.
“I want to show you something.” I stopped and took out a blindfold.
She twitched her nose. “What are you doing?”
I turned her around, covered her eyes with a black bandana, and tied it loosely. “I have a surprise for you. It won’t be a surprise if you can see it from here.”
“Seth,” she huffed, but allowed me to lead her as the soft cool breeze reminded me that it was fall. The orange, yellow, and red leaves on the ground decorated the small section of the field where our special bench was set. There were only a few benches there and the others were closer to the cafeteria. Out to the left were the basketball courts, and beyond were the monkey bars, swings, and the slide set on a patch of sand.
“We’re here,” I said, taking the blindfold off.
Josie blinked, then blinked some more, until she cried my name, “Seth.” She covered her mouth with her hands and looked at me. “You did this for me? You’re so sweet. I don’t deserve this.”
I yanked her into my arms. “Yes, you do, Josie. You deserve so much more. Don’t you forget that.”
She nodded with tears in her eyes. “I love you, Seth.” Then she pressed her lips onto mine.
Josie
What was Seth up to? I let him take me blindly. I would go anywhere with him. When he took off the blindfold, I had to adjust my vision. Blinking, I saw twinkling lights, but I thought it was from my blurry eyes. How wrong I was. On the table and along both sides of the benches were fake candles glowing, lighting up the night. And the nearby trees danced with white lights. Looking enchanted, I was in a fairytale world. When Seth told me we were having a late dinner, I had no idea it was going to be back at our elementary school table.
“Good evening,” Elijah said, dressed all in black like a waiter.
“Would you like some wine?” Alex, also dressed in black pants and sweater, poured some in the glasses already set on the table.
The picnic table was covered with a black polyester tablecloth and red rose petals were scattered everywhere.
I smiled at them, and I couldn’t stop giggling. It was difficult
to contain my laughter and my happiness.
When Elijah opened the silver container, the aroma of seafood linguini, vegetables, and rice pilaf burst through the air. My hunger pains got worse.
“You have the most amazing friends,” I complimented, looking at Alex in Elijah’s arms. They were walking away from us, giving us space.
“They’re your friends too, Josie,” Seth said, taking a bite of squash.
He was right. They treated me as if we had been friends from the start.
“I want to show you something.” Seth lifted the right corner of the tablecloth on my side. It was the shape of a heart. Inside the heart read Seth + Josie. Underneath read— 4EVER.
“You did this? When? I don’t remember.” I shook my head, trying to recall.
“The week after you never came back to school. I knew I’d lost you. I carved this on the table after school, hoping that somehow it would bring you back to me. I know it’s silly, but it was my way of letting you know how I felt.”
“Oh, Seth,” I swallowed back the tears. “I’m so sorry.”
Seth pressed his chest into the table as if he could stress his words even more. Covering my hand with his, he said, “No, I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you, that you couldn’t tell me. I wish I could have done something back then.”
I smiled, knowing he would have done anything he could to save me. “But we’re here now, together, and that’s all that matters. Our roads have crossed once more.”
“Yes, they have. I’m glad they did.”
Sometimes I wondered what would have happened if I had been taken away from my parents. Would my life have brought me back to Seth? I would never know. But I knew one thing for sure—I loved Seth. If we were meant to be, it would have happened no matter where life would have taken me. That was the funny thing about life: No matter what road you decide to take or how many different paths you travel on, you’re right back where you should be. I truly believe that. I was meant to be with Seth, and here I was.
“I want to show you something else,” Seth said. “Look down to your left on the bench.”
I dipped my head as instructed. “What am I looking for?” When I felt my fingers move and something slid on my right ring finger, I looked at my hand. “Seth?” I was staring at a white-gold ring with an eternity symbol on it, and beside it was a Tiffany’s box.
“It’s a promise ring. You’re taking a chance and moving to San Francisco with me. It’s a promise to let you know how serious I am about our relationship, just like the carving on the bench, Seth and Josie forever. And one day another ring will be placed on your left hand.”
“Oh, Seth.” I couldn’t contain my happiness. I had no choice but to blink to hold back the tears welling in my eyes. “I love it. Thank you.”
Seth took my other hand and held both of them together. “No, thank you. You see, you came into my life when I needed you. You filled my life with sunshine even when there was rain.”
“It was mutual.” I smiled.
After we finished our meal, Elijah and Alex cleared our table and left. The candles still glowed around us as Seth and I lay across the table in opposite directions with our legs dangling. The stars weren’t as bright as when we were at the campground, but they glowed just enough to be seen.
Seth kissed my lips. “Do you have to leave tomorrow?” I pouted, feeling the softness of the petals and taking a long whiff. Something about the smell made me feel euphoric, giving me peace.
He gave me a soft smile. “The pain of growing up. I’ll be back soon, or next time you can come to me. Whatever you feel comfortable with. We should start looking for a place together.”
Seth closed his eyes when I brushed his long beautiful lashes with my finger, and then traced down his nose to his soft, kissable lips. “I’ll decide then. Is that okay?”
“Sure,” he said, taking my hand and placing it over his heart. “You own this, all of it, every beat of it.”
What could I say after that? He made my heart full and filled me up with a feeling I couldn’t describe. My hand was still over Seth’s thumping heart that was beating for me. I took his hand and placed it over mine. His hand rested over the curve of my breast, penetrating the warmth, and making my heart thunder.
“I told you when we were older you would let me.” He twitched his brows playfully in the naughtiest way. “Let’s go home.” He winked.
“Let’s,” I said, already having dirty thoughts of what he would do to me.
Seth extended his hand to help me.
“Turn around, Seth. You owe me a ride.”
“You can ride me anytime.” His words came out flirty. After he turned, I hopped on his back, and together as one, we set our course for home.
Sometimes, if we get lucky, even the survivors get their happy ending. I stared at Seth, one of the things I loved to do, and counted my lucky stars that I’d found him again. Seth was not just my happy ending; he was my happy beginning.
EPILOGUE
Six Months Later
Seth
“You look so handsome, Seth. I might just find a way to seduce you to keep you home so I can have my way with you.” Josie tugged at my blue-and-white-striped tie she had bought me for my birthday. It went perfectly with the dark-gray suit I was wearing. Giving me the flirty eyes, she bit her bottom lip.
I waggled my brows. “I’ll just let you dream of me all day at work, then you can have your way with me when I come home.” I lightly gripped her jaw, pulling her into a kiss.
Josie linked her arm into mine, following me to the door. “What time will you be home?”
I laced my fingers through her hair and kissed her cheek. “Depending on what time you get home.”
“Since I’m the manager, I guess when I feel like it.”
Mom had decided to open a restaurant near the Berkeley campus and asked Josie to be the manager. There was no one like Mom. It was one way of making sure everyone was happy and taken care of. As for the other Mama Rose back home, I gave Debbie an offer she couldn’t refuse. I also made sure she would have her weekends off. It was a done deal.
“Then I’ll see you soon. We can book our flights together this evening. My mom wanted to know if we were coming home next weekend.”
“My mom did too,” Josie said. Josie never smiled warmly when she mentioned her mother. Some scars took a lot longer to heal than others…and maybe they never healed completely, but just enough to move forward.
Turning the doorknob, I looked behind me at our little condo. It would be a temporary place of living until I could save enough money to move us to a bigger place. Josie and I had decorated to make it look more appealing. Pictures of our family and friends were set around the living room, and a few of Josie’s paintings adorned the wall. Just like Elijah’s place, color filled what was once dull, and light filled what was once dark.
I gave Josie a soft, tender kiss, the kind of kiss she could hold on to and dream about all day. “I’ll see you back at home, and then I’ll finish this kiss.”
“You’re bad, Seth. I’m not going to be able to concentrate at work.” She pouted.
“Then I better leave. The sooner the day flies by, the sooner I’ll see you. And I better get to work. I don’t want to be late.”
Josie embraced me with all her love. “I love you. Drive safe.”
“I love you more than you’ll ever know,” I said and closed the door behind me after I gave her one more kiss on the lips.
Looking ahead, I had no idea where life would lead Josie and me, but I knew one thing for sure as I looked at the license plate on my dad’s Mustang that Elijah had helped me fix up—S+J=4EVER. We had fixed the car up better than she had been. Smelling the leather seats, taking in the warmth of the sun, and feeling like my dad was sitting right next to me, I drove off to work.
Josie
After watching Seth drive away, I stood there reminiscing back to sixth grade, to our special bench, to the time when I first told him that I loved h
im. I still couldn’t believe we were together after all these years.
“We should get going,” Seth said, soaking up the sun that was beaming through the space between the leaves and the branches. Depending on the breeze, sometimes it caught his eyes, making them brighter. “The bell is going to ring.”
“I don’t care.” I closed my eyes for a second and shifted my butt. Mom had hit me last night and it hurt to lie down on the wooden table, but I did it anyway. I wanted to be close to Seth like this.
The bell rang. Seth was about to get up, but I placed my hand out. He lay back down and took my hand to place it over his heart. Feeling the hammer of his heart made me still. I loved the way it felt under the palm of my hand. It was the closest I could get to him.
“My heart is beating so fast,” Seth said shyly. “I think you’re making it that way.”
I giggled. “You make my heart beat fast like that too. But I’m not going to let you touch mine. You can’t touch me there.”
Seth smirked in a naughty way. “Maybe when we’re older you will.”
We stayed still for another minute.
“We should get going, Josie.” Seth sounded a little urgent this time. He hated being late.
“I want to tell you something,” I started to say, feeling a little hesitant. “I want you to know that you’re my hero. You make me happy.”
The second bell rang. “Crap!” Seth rolled off the table and I did the same. As he held my hand, we ran like crazy. “You make me happy too, Josie Rosie!”
“I think I love you,” I blurted.
“I think I love you more than you’ll ever know,” Seth shouted.
But he didn’t. He couldn’t possibly have…because he was my everything, my hero, my hope, my serenity, and I loved him more.
International Bestselling Author Mary Ting/M. Clarke resides in Southern California with her husband and two children. She enjoys oil painting and making jewelry. Writing her first novel, Crossroads Saga, happened by chance. It was a way to grieve the death of her beloved grandmother, and inspired by a dream she once had as a young girl. When she started reading new adult novels, she fell in love with the genre. It was the reason she had to write one-Something Great. Why the pen name, M Clarke? She tours with Magic Johnson Foundation to promote literacy and her children's chapter book-No Bullies Allowed.
