by D. J. Gelner
If one were to examine the print on the label, he would have seen something even odder, especially given that it was just past the turn of the millennium:
The Macallan
Highland Single Malt Scotch Whiskey
Aged 18 Years
And a single phrase, printed in ink, across the bottom of the label:
Special Limited Release—Vintage 2014
The bum sighed, a mix of contentment and exasperation. He stared half-awake at the rarely-abundant London sun and searched for some semblance of familiarity, something that he could latch onto after the chaos that had marked his life thus far.
“You know, there’s a fine for littering, dontchya…?” A long shadow settled over this most truly homeless of men. The voice certainly wasn’t that of an Englishman, but was more familiar, American, downright folksy.
The hobo unpocketed a pair of too-fancy spectacles and desperately rubbed the lenses free of soot and residue. He squinted at the pale sunlight and, though he was close to the point of seeing double, made out the form of an athletic-looking fellow. This man wore sunglasses, and the hair was a bit longer, but its sandy-blonde texture and the well-crafted jawline gave the stranger away almost immediately.
“You…huh…Comman….Commanduh…Cor…Corcor—?” the panhandler asked, though in his drunkenness, the sentiment was barely recognizable.
“Come on, Doc,” the stranger knelt to the hobo’s level and extended a hand. “We’ve got work to do.”
Thanks For Reading!
I do hope you enjoyed following the good doctor on his travels through the space-time continuum. If you enjoyed the book, please feel free to review it wherever you purchased it and/or Goodreads. Every review helps other like-minded folks find this book, and, in turn, gives them the chance to review it, which gives their friends the ability to…well, you get the point.
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Check Out D.J.’s Other Releases
Rogue
Men and women huddled hundreds deep, hoping to will their way into the secretive facility. Struggle or interfere on the long desert trek and they’re shot. Getting in is tough; thousands will be turned away. Once inside, hard labor and years of servitude await.
Far fewer still will accomplish their ultimate goal, a whisper of a shadow of a dream in the face of soul-crushing hopelessness.
So why do those who make it inside consider themselves the lucky ones?
Available in Paperback, as well as on Kindle, iBooks, Nook, Kobo, and Smashwords.
Hack: The Complete Game
Roger "Hack" O'Callahan is angry. Even though he's managed four World Series-winning teams over a career spanning more than forty years, he's finally encountered a foe he can't beat: liver cancer.
Armed with a supply of his favorite cheap whiskey ("Old Reliable") and with his sharp tongue zipping off callous remarks from his foul mouth, Hack decides to spit in the face of his impending demise by worming his way into managing the AA Hoplite Magpies, a team divided and at odds with each other and the rest of the Northern League. As Hack instills a little "old school" discipline in this rag-tag bunch, he comes to find that his players are keeping secrets of their own, secrets that threaten to tear his clubhouse and the world of sports apart at the seams, and which may ultimately cost them their lives.
The omnibus version of the series originally released in three parts, Hack: The Complete Game is a thrilling roller coaster ride of a comedy similar to Major League or Bull Durham, with plenty of dark twists that will keep you laughing and guessing until its shocking conclusion.
Available in Paperback, as well as on Kindle. Innings 1-3 is also available for Kindle for $0.99 if you want to try the series out low-risk.
Coming Soon
Corcoran’s Log
Corcoran Was a Time Traveler
Debt of Souls
Stay Tuned for Updates:
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About the Author
D.J. Gelner is a sportswriter, radio personality, and attorney. He worked at a large law firm for several years before shifting his focus to writing full-time. He lives in Clayton, Missouri with his dog, Sully.
Acknowledgements
Writing this novel has been an amazing experience. It’s not the first novel I’ve written, but it’s the first one to be released, and as I’ve always said, a novel not able to be read by all is no novel at all. It was also extremely fun to write; for his many faults, Doctor Templeton is a great character with whom to share one’s head (see, writing as him is a tough habit to break). I only hope the good doctor made you think and chuckle (hopefully in that order) as much as he did me.
I’d like to thank first and foremost my loving parents, Dennis and Pat Gelner. Mom and Dad, I love you both very much, and I truly wouldn’t have been able to write this book without your allowing me to use your house as my office for so many days this summer and fall. Not to mention, you know, all of the years of private school, college, law school and whatnot for which I can never truly repay you, but thank you nonetheless. To preempt any questions, no, Phineas’s parents are not modeled after my own. I do like to think, though, that my affection and love for both of them matches Finny’s own admiration of his father.
To my brother, Grant: you’re more of an inspiration to me than you can possibly know. Thank you so much for always being there to listen to me gripe, or to offer insights on life, my books, or just random stuff about sports. I always know that when I have a chance to hang out or talk with you, I’ll come away from the conversation with a smile on my face. I love you, man. Oh yeah—also, thanks for the excellent Orion’s Comet logo; it really is great.
Thanks to my beta readers, Sara Eagan, Chris Burke, and Lauren Clasen, who gave excellent feedback on ways to improve what was a relatively rough first effort. You guys are awesome; I doubt this novel would be nearly as enjoyable or sensical without your input, especially on the ending.
I’d like to thank Jenga and Sully for being such excellent writing partners; you guys are the best co-workers I’ve ever had (no offense intended to any of my other former co-workers).
Thanks to Derek Murphy for the great cover design on both the digital and print editions of this book; I think it’s a really top-notch cover in both forms of media.
I also owe a hearty “thank you” to all of my teachers through the years, good and bad, for helping to make me the writer that I am now. I think two deserve special recognition as far as helping guide me toward fiction. One is Mrs. Maggie Eisenberger, who first nurtured and encouraged my interest in fiction in second and third grade. Though many were short, fifteen page “choose your own adventure” tales about dinosaurs and more still were recountings of my exploits to come in the NHL, Mrs. Eisenberger always offered kind words of encouragement. She even went so far as to send off some of the hockey stories to the Blues, which prompted a visit from Blues announcer John Kelly, a highlight of my young life, which showed me how rewarding fiction can be.
The other is Dr. Richard Sandler. I had Dr. Sandler for English my senior year, and he always had a creative essay option at the end of the books we read, as well as a short fiction “workshop” portion of the class at the end of the year. It was the first time I wrote fiction that would be read aloud, and I have to say, putting myself out there for the first time was a big step on the path that has led me here. To you both, I owe you debts of gratitude that I fear I can never truly repay.
Also thank you to Adam
Carolla, Bill Simmons, Alison Rosen, and Pete Holmes; though you don’t know me, your podcasts helped me get through many a long brainstorming walk. In return, I’ve added a few Easter Eggs here and there in the book that I hope your fans are “hyper vigilant” enough to catch.
To Dean Wesley Smith, Kristine Rusch, and Joe Konrath, thank you for your excellent books and blogs that provide a road map for aspiring writers, even if that map can be at times an empty maze!
To everyone who has offered words of encouragement as I’ve written this book (or any of my other stuff), even so much as a facebook “like,” thank you. You have no idea how much your support means to me. Also, to those of you who have doubted me or expressed derision, even something as little as a raised eyebrow or cross-eyed glance when I mentioned that I planned on becoming a novelist, thank you as well, for giving me a different form of motivation to keep going and improving my writing.
And finally, thank you for taking the time to read this book. I hope that you enjoyed it enough to continue along in the series; I currently have a couple of novellas planned between this book and the second one, so be on the lookout for those shortly. I can’t do this full-time without folks supporting my work, and all I can do is try to write stories that are worth the price you paid.
Though this is a big first step on my journey as a writer, it’s exactly that; a first step. Now comes the hard part: writing the next book, and hoping that it’s as fun for me to write as it is for you to read.
Again, my most sincere thanks.
-D.J. Gelner
January 3, 2013
