by Claire Adams
I’ve never felt like my world was small, though. My mother and father often took me to neighboring Switzerland and Austria. Plus, we had traveled to England and Spain once each on summer vacations. It was a simple life, but a very happy one.
My parents believed strongly in my education. So, I went to a private Christian school and learned both German and English as I grew up. My father always said that I would need English so I could travel to the United States someday and go to college. He also stressed that knowing English would open up many different career paths when I got older.
Although I still hadn’t had the chance to go to a traditional college, traveling to America was always a dream of mine. In fact, my best friend Ana and I often talked about what it would be like to live in a country like America. We watched American television shows, idolized their stars, and listened to their music. Both Ana and I were set on making it to America someday.
“But, Jordan, how will you ever take care of yourself?” my mother said, as a last ditch effort to try and get me to ask her to stay.
“Mother, I have my nursing certificate now. I can take care of myself.”
“I feel like I’m abandoning you.”
“Stop, Mom. You’re not abandoning me. I’m an adult. It’s time for me to spread my wings. You deserve to go enjoy life, and Scott wants to take you around the world. He’s such a good man, Mom. I’m very happy for you both.”
It was the truth. Scott was a really good guy. I knew it the moment I first met him. He had come to our apartment in Schaan to take my mom on a date. First of all, any man who would drive four hours to take a woman on a date was pretty impressive. But then, he brought both my mother and I flowers when he came to the door. It was so nice and showed that he understood what a close bond we had.
Over the last year, Scott and my mother had traveled a little, but she always came home because she didn’t want to leave me behind. Scott had even invited me to go with them a few times, but I didn’t want to impede on their time.
Finally, when Scott proposed, he first asked me if it was all right and if I approved. After losing my father, I never thought I could trust another man, and I certainly didn’t think my mother would ever find a match. I was so happy that she had a second chance at love.
“Well, the wedding is in a few hours. So I guess it’s too late to back out now,” my mother joked.
“Yep, you’ll have to go through with it.”
We both laughed, and I knew at that moment that my life was about to change. My mother and my Ana were the two most important people in my life, but within the next two weeks, they would both be living their own dreams.
My mother was getting married to the man of her dreams, and my best friend was flying to America to meet up with her man. I felt overwhelmed by the prospect of staying in Liechtenstein without these two very important women.
It wasn’t overwhelming because of the financial difficulties, although those would be tough. The most overwhelming part of my mother and Ana leaving was going to be the feeling of getting left behind. They were both moving on with their lives, and I was just stuck. Stuck all alone in a country that was so isolated, I knew I would never meet the man of my dreams.
***
“Jordan, your mother looks amazing. When are they leaving on their honeymoon and Scott’s business trip? Are you excited to have the apartment all to yourself soon?” Ana asked as we waited for our turn to walk down the aisle.
Ana had always been the talker between the two of us. Sometimes, she would talk for a good ten minutes before she would let me get a word. I didn’t mind, though. It worked for our relationship. I was the quiet one and Ana was the loud one. I was the shy one and Ana was the outgoing one. The opposite nature of our personalities helped us both throughout our relationship.
“I’m scared as heck, Ana.”
“Why? I thought you liked Scott.”
“Yes, I’m not scared for her. I’m scared for me. I don’t make enough money to pay all the bills alone. I’m going to have to take on roommates or something if I’m going to survive. You are going to be gone. I’m going to have to start hanging around my friends from work. Yuck.”
“Does your Mom know you’re not going to be able to pay the bills?”
“Of course not, Ana. And don’t you tell her. She’s finally accepting that I’ll be all right on my own. I can’t ruin that. I’ll just have to work two jobs so I can pay the bills.”
“Alright, but I still think you should sign up for the OK Love website. You know Gordon is one of the greatest guys I’ve ever met. I’m so happy with him.”
“Ana, you haven’t been with him. You met him over the Internet. I don’t see how you could even have feelings for a man you’ve never met.”
“Jordan, we talk on the phone, and we’ve Skyped. I know I love him. I can tell. And I think you should at least put your profile on the site and see if you find anyone you like.”
“You know those men from America are just looking for a wife, right?” I asked.
“What’s wrong with that? Isn’t that the whole reason we date people? Our hope is that we will find someone we bond with and can love and get married to. That website just puts two like-minded people together.”
The music started to play, and I watched as my mother came out of the dressing room behind us. She looked amazing, but most of all, she looked happier than I had ever seen her before. The smile on her face radiated like the sun as it rose in the morning. I really couldn’t remember a time when my mother had looked that happy. It made me feel really good to see that kind of light coming from her.
Ana started to walk down the aisle, and I took the moment to straighten my mother’s dress and get her ready to walk down the aisle.
Finding love once in a lifetime was a pretty big feat, but finding it twice was downright awesome. My father had been such an amazing man; it was really uplifting to see that my mother had been able to find a second love to share her life with.
“You look beautiful, Mom. I’ll see you at the end of the aisle,” I said as I started my walk down the rose-covered center aisle of our church.
The look I saw in Scott’s eyes told me that my mother was making the right choice. He smiled at me as I walked up to the front of the church and stood across from him, but his eyes instantly filled with tears when he saw my mother standing at the back of the church. His love for her flowed from him and made me want to find a love like that.
Even the most skeptical of people would reconsider, when they saw the love that my mother and Scott had. It was deeper than just physical lust. More varied than romantic interest. They wanted to grow old together. Both of them had reached middle age and were ready to take on the second half of their life together. The drama of young adulthood was gone, and both my mother and Scott were ready to move forward with the undying love of each other.
I had been very unlucky in love throughout my life. My school boyfriends bored me, and when I got older, I decided to try dating more of the bad boy type of guys. Unfortunately, they didn’t have much else to talk about but why they hated everyone and the crimes they had committed in the past.
I really had no idea what it was I was looking for. Something between sweet and naughty, but I just didn’t know where in between there I wanted my guy to fall. Of course, I didn’t want a guy that was so sweet he seemed like my girlfriend instead of my boyfriend. But I also didn’t really want the bad boy type, either. I knew there had to be someone that was a right fit for me, though. Somewhere out there, I had a man that would make me weak in the knees with just one kiss. I just had to find him.
All I wanted was a nice, normal guy. Normal in the sense that he didn’t party all the time, didn’t treat his family horribly, and could hold a decent conversation. The pool of available men was pretty bleak. Maybe I would have to go to America if I was going to find the man I really wanted. When I watch all the American television shows, it looks like the perfect place to find a good man.
&
nbsp; My hope had always been that I would find some sort of combination of a bad boy and a smart guy. I wanted a man who worked hard and didn’t take life for granted, but he also knew how to have fun. I didn’t want to sit home every weekend and wish I had something fun to do. I wanted my man to be adventurous, and I wanted to always have fun places to explore together.
I also desperately wanted a man who could have fun in the bedroom. I knew I looked all sweet and innocent, but I loved to play and have fun between the sheets. I’d just never been able to find a man who liked the same things I did. They were either too conservative or too wild, never was there a guy that was just right for me. Admittedly, I was still only twenty-two years old, so I had lots of time to find my prince charming. But it would be nice to at least date a guy that wasn’t a total frog.
Ana was right about at least one thing – I wasn’t going to find the man of my dreams in Liechtenstein. I needed to get out into the world and start exploring to see if I could find where I fit in best.
As my mother and Scott said their vows, I let Ana’s suggestion of looking at the men in America cross my mind. I didn’t have any intention of getting married, though, and I knew those men often wanted that. But I wondered if there was a possibility that any of the men in America didn’t want to just get married right away.
When Ana and I walked down the aisle and toward the reception area, I blurted out my agreement to sign up for the website. She had been hounding me for weeks, and now, as her departure to America was getting so close, I had no choice but to cave in and give her website idea a try.
“I’ll sign up for OK Love, but I’m just signing up. I’m not saying I’m even going to talk to anyone. I’m just going to see who’s out there,” I said.
“All right. But I know you, and I know you’ll want to talk to the first handsome guy who sends you a message.”
Ana did know me, and she was right. I gave in pretty quickly when there was a handsome guy around. But I was getting older and wiser now. I didn’t want to give in to just anyone who showed an interest in me. I wanted my perfect match. I wanted a man who would treat me right and be there for me no matter what. It was a fairytale I wanted, and I knew it very much. But sometimes, people got their fairytale.
Ana proceeded to give me the ins and outs of the online dating world. During the wedding reception, we sat in the corner, and she helped me make up my profile page. I felt very overwhelmed by how fast it was happening, but there was a small part of me that desperately hoped I would find the man of my dreams online. Others were able to find their prince charming, so why not me?
I wanted to find my dream man any way I could. He was out there, and I knew it. I just had to spend the time and do the work so he knew I was out there, as well. There were good guys in the online dating world. I just knew it. They were probably busy with work and didn’t have time for the traditional dating scene. I just needed to put some energy into figuring out which of the men were good guys and which ones were jerks.
We fought the urge to spend the entire night on the website looking at guys, and finally turned our cell phones off, after we got my profile up and running. There were so many different profiles. I found it hard to figure out what I was really looking for in the guys. I hoped I would find someone that would feel like the connection was right.
“It shouldn’t take long. You’ll have guys messaging you by the time the night’s over. Make sure you don’t give out personal information yet. And, don’t trust they are who they say they are. Many of these guys are ashamed that they are looking to date a woman out of their country. But once I figured out that they were genuinely good guys, it was a lot more fun to talk to them.”
Ana seemed so happy since she had met her guy, Gordon, on the website. I had to admit I was a bit jealous when I saw his picture and how sweet he was to her. I really hoped he turned out to be the guy he said he was. Ana looked forward to meeting him in Miami in just a couple more days, and I couldn’t wait for her full report about what he was like.
It was time for me to move forward, and as my mother’s wedding ended and she started her new life with Scott, I prepared to start my new life. I wasn’t sure exactly how it was going to turn out, but I was one hundred percent sure I was going to enjoy it the best I could.
I knew I needed to make some changes, and moving to America sounded like the perfect opportunity to make all the changes I wanted. I hoped that by morning I would have a ton of sweet guys to talk to and get to know from that website. But if that didn’t work out, I was determined to pick up another job and save my money to make my way to America. There was no way I was staying in Liechtenstein, if my mom and Ana were both leaving.
Chapter 3
Chase
Sleeping was by far one of my favorite things to do. Unfortunately, it was not my father’s favorite thing for me to do. I sat up in bed as I heard his booming voice from the front room of my house.
Instantly, I regretted giving him the key.
“You don’t understand what having a job is. If you don’t show up to work, you don’t get paid. That’s what the real world is like,” my father, Reynold, said as he stood at the end of my bed.
“Slow the hell down, Dad. I went to work last week.”
“Last week. Really? Last week. I wish one of your brothers had stayed with the company. It makes me sick that you’re the only one willing to work for me, yet you don’t work at all.”
I saw the vein in my father’s neck pulse as he tried to calm his emotions over my work ethic. I didn’t actually mind going to work, but no one seemed interested in my opinions, and the company was still stuck in the ’90’s most of the time. That was exactly why my brothers had all moved on to other jobs. Dad never let anyone have an opinion in his company. When I made suggestions for streamlining our processes or adding social media, I was often met with negative feedback.
“You’re my son, Chase. And I had always hoped that I would be able to pass the company on to you, but I don’t know.”
“Dad, come on. I’m working hard. I just do a lot of shit from home. And, let’s be honest, you would have picked any of my brothers over me if they had wanted to be involved in the company.”
“Chase, you have to set an example. You’re more than just my son. You’re a high-level executive in the company and everything you do reflects back on us as an organization. And, we aren’t talking about your brothers. Jackson, George, Nathan, and Jeremiah all had their opportunity to work for me, and they chose not to. You made the choice to work, so I expect you to actually work.”
“I know, Dad. I try to set a good example.”
“Then, why did I pick up the newspaper this morning and read a story about you flying to Dubai with the wife of an Atlanta Braves player?”
I cringed.
I had hoped that story wouldn’t get published, and even had tried to bribe the tabloid not to write it. But knowing that it had been published in the Herald meant that more than just the tabloids had pictures from that trip.
“In my defense, I didn’t know she was married.”
“Chase, she has her wedding ring on in the photo.”
“Hmmm, that’s a wedding ring?”
“Don’t give me that bullshit. You spend your nights out with married women, and you’re drinking and partying all the time. I’ve just about had it with you. Life isn’t all about fun and games. When are you going to settle down? When are you going to get over this wild phase?”
“I’ll come to work today. Will that make you feel better?”
“Don’t mock me, Chase. Either you want a job at Foster Industries or you don’t.”
“Dad, give me a fucking break. You’re not going to fire me. I’m your son.”
“That’s it. I’m done with this. I thought closing our joint accounts was enough, but apparently it isn’t. As of today, I will no longer carry your loans, pay your debts, or provide you any financial assistance. You want to be a grown up, then I need to see you start acting l
ike one. Settle down, find a nice girl, maybe even show up for work.”
“Are you seriously saying you’re not even going to pay for my house until I settle down?”
I saw my father think about everything for a moment. I knew he wanted me to calm down my lifestyle, and I had felt the money pinch when he stopped paying for most of my things. But cutting me off entirely meant I would have no money at all.
“I planned to hand this company over to you at the stockholders’ meeting. Now, I can’t see that as an option. I’m going to start looking for a suitable replacement.”
“Seriously, Dad? You’re going to fucking leave me with nothing?”
“You have until the shareholders’ meeting to get your life together. I don’t know exactly how you’re going to do that in only a few, short months. But if you don’t, I’ll hand the company over to someone else. I would suggest you start by showing up to work every day!”
He turned and walked out of my room. The look on his face showed me that he was one hundred percent serious. I had seen that look before, and there was no way I could fight him on that. I had seen the same look in his eyes when he had told all four of my brothers they either needed to commit to working with him or leave.
I had seen that look in his eyes, when I was in high school and continually fucked around and got bad grades. My father had always allowed us to make a reasonable amount of mistakes on our own, but at some point, he would snap and put his foot down. He got tired of the messing around and forced my brothers and me to make a decision about what it was we really wanted out of life.
My brothers had all tried to work with Dad, but he was too difficult for them to get along with. The job itself was a great job. The company was a great company. The problem always came back to working with Dad. He was stubborn and stuck in the past. Any kind of innovation was difficult for him, unless it was specific to the parts we made and the costs to make them. He seemed to totally miss the idea that social media, websites, and other changes could really bring in a lot of money or save a lot of money.
