Mary leaned closer to Mr. Lucas and stopped the young man’s question as Caroline nodded and answered, “The gowns were splendid and the gentlemen came in uniform. It was the highlight of the season.”
Sensing Mr. Bingley’s distress at his sister’s descriptions of the event, Jane returned the conversation to Mr. Darcy’s sister as the second course was served.
“Tell us more about your sister, Mr. Darcy,” she asked from three seats away. Catching Elizabeth’s eye with a pointed look, the sisters steered the conversation to safer subjects.
++**++
Upon the return to Netherfield after the dinner, the Bingley family and their guest parted company; Mrs. Hurst went to consult with the housekeeper on the refreshments to serve when the neighbourhood gathered for the fox hunt, all three of the gentlemen turned to business correspondence, and Caroline went to bed to rest for a few hours. When they gathered in the evening for a light supper, Miss Bingley began abusing Elizabeth immediately.
“Mrs. Hamilton has such very bad manners – a mixture of pride and impertinence. And to have her child in company in the middle of the afternoon! Children are not to be seen in polite company!”
“Caroline, Mrs. Hamilton is a pleasant conversationalist and she has excellent taste in clothing!” Mrs. Hurst argued.
Sneering at her sister, Miss Bingley replied, “As always Louisa, you are not observant or accurate. Mrs. Hamilton has no conversation, no style, and no beauty. She has nothing to recommend her but being an excellent walker. I shall never forget her appearance this afternoon when she returned to the house with the gentlemen. She really looked almost wild.”
“She did, indeed, Caroline,” Charles remarked sarcastically. “I could hardly keep my countenance. It is very nonsensical to walk about the country on a lovely afternoon in the fall!”
Failing to notice her brother’s tone, Caroline continued, “Yes, and her petticoat; I hope you saw her petticoat! It was six inches deep in mud, I am absolutely certain; and the gown which had been let down to hide it not doing its office.”
“Your picture may be very exact, Caroline,” said Bingley; “but this was all lost upon me. I thought Mrs. Hamilton looked remarkably well when she joined the gentlemen this afternoon. Her dirty petticoat quite escaped my notice.”
“You observed it, Mr. Darcy, I am sure,” said Miss Bingley; “and I am inclined to think that you would not wish to see your sister make such an exhibition.”
“Certainly not,” Darcy replied but then he seemed to reconsider his answer. “I have seen my sister return from riding at Pemberley with a great deal of mud on her skirts and shoes.”
“She walked miles, across the fields of the estate, above her ankles in dirt, and alone, quite alone! What could she mean by it? It seems to me to show an abominable sort of conceited independence, a most country-town indifference to decorum.”
“What can be objectionable for a lady to walk about her family’s estate, Caroline?” asked Mr. Hurst. “You often walk in the gardens at Netherfield in the afternoons.”
“But I remain upon the gravel pathways!”
When no one remarked upon her complaints¸ Miss Bingley observed in a half whisper, “Surely this adventure will affect your admiration of Mrs. Hamilton’s fine eyes, Mr. Darcy.”
Reminded of Mrs. Hamilton’s fine eyes, Darcy did not reply though Louisa and Charles both noticed the change in Darcy’s face at the mention of the lady’s eyes. Shortly thereafter, the party adjourned to the dining room for their supper.
“And I was surprised at the insignificance of the library at Longbourn this afternoon, Mr. Darcy” Miss Bingley said, launching into a new discussion of the Bennet family while at the supper table. “From Mrs. Hamilton’s speech regarding books she had read as a girl, I expected something resembling the library at Pemberley. Imagine her attempt to attribute a few dusty books to significance.”
When no one responded, she addressed the object of her attentions directly. “I believe your library is among the best in the country Mr. Darcy.”
“It ought to be good,” he replied. “It has been the work of many generations.”
“And you have added to the library yourself; you are always discussing new books you have purchased.”
“I would not neglect the family library.”
“Neglect! I am sure you neglect nothing that can add to the beauties of that noble place,” Miss Bingley insisted.
Turning to her brother, she added, “Charles, when you build your own house, I wish it may be half as delightful as Pemberley.”
“I wish it may,” Charles admitted. “Pemberley is delightful at all seasons.”
“But I would advise you to make your purchase in that neighbourhood and take Pemberley for a kind of model. There is not a finer county in England than Derbyshire.”
“How can that be, Miss Bingley?” asked Mr. Darcy. “Just today you decried the distance of Hertfordshire from London – a mere twenty miles. My home in Derbyshire is another hundred miles north – almost three days’ travel by carriage in good weather.”
Embarrassed Caroline blushed, but this time Charles came to her rescue though he winked at his friend. “With all my heart; I will buy Pemberley itself if Darcy will sell it for a proper price.”
“I am talking of possibilities, Charles,” Caroline grumbled, once again unhappy that her siblings would not join her in praising Mr. Darcy to gain his attentions.
“Upon my word, I should think it more possible to get Pemberley by purchase than by imitation,” Mr. Hurst added. “Perhaps Mr. Darcy has the plans available and Charles could commission a duplicate.”
For a moment Caroline was excited by the idea before noticing the smirks shared by the gentlemen.
“Why should Charles not build a house that resembles Pemberley?” she inquired.
Mr. Darcy answered thusly; “Each great house is unique Miss Bingley. No one builds their house as an exact copy of Chatsworth, Pemberley or Blenheim.”
“Of course, Mr. Darcy. You know best on such matters,” Caroline agreed.
“I say Charles that was very good shooting at Longbourn today,” Mr. Hurst ventured with a change in the conversation.
“Elizabeth Hamilton,” said Miss Bingley, determined not to relinquish control of the discussions, “is one of those ladies who seek to recommend themselves to the other sex by undervaluing their own. But, in my opinion, it is a paltry device, a very mean art.”
“Undoubtedly a paltry device,” replied Darcy, to whom this remark was chiefly addressed. “I believe that there is meanness in all the arts which ladies sometimes condescend to employ for captivation.”
Not certain if Mr. Darcy was addressing her own efforts or endorsing her statement, Caroline looked to her sister and brother but once again, they were discussing other matters. Mortified to be deserted and not entirely satisfied with his reply, Miss Bingley remained silent and no one else attempted to begin conversation so they all retired and thus ended the day with shooting at Longbourn.
++**++
Chapter 20.
In Which Mr. Collins Arrives Unexpectedly
“Excuse me, Mrs. Hamilton. Letters have arrived for you,” said Mr. Hill as he held the silver salver in front of him.
“Thank you, Hill,” Elizabeth replied as she took the four letters. “Is the purse for franking letters still sufficient?”
“Yes, madam,” the butler replied, patting his coat pocket. “Mrs. Hill keeps it filled for me.”
Walking toward the library to find Jane and Mary, Elizabeth looked through her mail; the first letter was from the solicitor in London, the second was from the steward for Mount Pleasant, the third was a thick envelope from her new sister, Lady Gwendolyn, and the final letter was a thick one from Lord Rutherford. She knew it would be a long letter from her father-in-law’s secretary concerning a business arrangement with her Uncle Gardiner but the letter would include at least one page from the Earl with inquiries regarding Matthew and herself.
“When you have a moment, please have one of the stable boys find Mr. Smyth and ask him to attend me sometime this afternoon,” Elizabeth instructed the butler. Hill immediately set his polishing cloth down and rose to leave the room, so she continued, “Wait until you have to go into the kitchen again, Hill. It is not urgent.”
“Yes Mrs. Hamilton, but I believe Mr. Smyth checks on the stables every day and it would save him a second trip to the house if the boys know to send him in whenever he arrives.”
“He checks the stables every day?” Elizabeth asked.
“Yes madam. He explained to me and Mr. Barrow that Mr. Darcy counselled him to do so while the master was from home. Your driver and the stable boys didn’t seem to mind it.”
“Did Mr. Smyth mention when Mr. Darcy had this conversation about the Longbourn stables?”
Mr. Hill smiled and replied, “It was the day of the shooting party here. Mr. Darcy admired the greys and the mares, Mrs. Hamilton. Mr. Thomas spoke with both gentlemen at length regarding the horses.”
Nodding absently then, her mind suddenly full of Mr. Darcy for the third time that day, Elizabeth made her way into the library to find Mary and Jane’s faces marked with distress.
“My dear sisters, what is wrong?” she asked.
Mary looked at Jane who replied to the unspoken question, “Show her.”
“We have an unexpected visitor appearing at our door in a week’s time,” Mary said as she handed a letter to Elizabeth who stood before the desk the sisters shared.
“Who do you mean?” asked Elizabeth as she unfolded the letter.
“We received this letter from our father’s cousin, Mr. Collins.”
“And this Mr. Collins is the cousin who inherits Longbourn when our father passes away?” asked Elizabeth.
“Yes, and we fear it will distress our Mother terribly if we… when we tell her of this letter’s existence and our uninvited guest,” Jane said. “She fears the entail still.”
Elizabeth asked. “What does Mr. Collins want?”
“Read the letter and see,” Mary suggested handing the paper to her sister.
After reading the letter, Elizabeth folded it up and turned to her sisters, “He invites himself for a visit beginning at four of the clock on the 18th.”
“He seems to be most conscientious – perhaps he is a gentleman,” Mary offered though her face did not agree with her words.
“It is difficult to guess in what way he means to make the atonement he thinks is necessary,” added Jane.
Elizabeth shook her head and glanced at the letter once more. “I am struck by our cousin’s extraordinary deference for Lady Catherine, and his kind intention of christening, marrying, and burying his parishioners whenever it was required.”
“He must be an oddity,” Mary surmised. “We cannot make out his character from the letter and decided to seek your opinion, Lizzy.
“There is something very pompous in his style. And what can he mean by apologizing for being next in the entail?”
“Could he be nonsensical?” asked Jane.
“In point of composition, the letter is not defective,” Mary said. “The idea of the olive-branch is welcome but hardly necessary.”
“Have you replied to this letter?” Elizabeth asked.
Jane shook her head. “We could not write to a gentleman, Lizzy. I shall however write to Uncle Gardiner informing him of the letter from Mr. Collins and his intention to visit but I do not think any letter from our uncle would reach Mr. Collins before he sets out for Hertfordshire.”
“We must prepare Mamma,” Jane said.
“Do we have to allow him to stay underneath our roof?” asked Mary.
Elizabeth shook her head. “No, it would be improper for Mr. Collins to be under our roof without Father here.”
“But he invited himself to stay with us,” Mary observed.
“He thinks that Father is in residence,” Jane surmised and Elizabeth nodded in agreement. “There has never been any correspondence between Father and Mr. Collins in the past.”
“Could Uncle Gardiner be here on the 18th?” asked Mary but both of her sisters frowned.
“We have already imposed greatly on Uncle Gardiner,” Jane said.
“I do not think we need Uncle Gardiner here,” Elizabeth said. “We will ask Mr. Fallows, the Longbourn rector, to attend us when Mr. Collins arrives.”
“Do we dare impose on Mr. Fallows to house Mr. Collins for the duration of his visit?” asked Mary.
“Mr. and Mrs. Fallows and their six children fill the parsonage,” Jane replied. “There is not room for a cat let alone another adult in that house.”
++**++
As the date for Mr. Collins arrival approached, Mrs. Bennet suffered three episodes of her nerves overwhelming her otherwise calm exterior. Jane, Elizabeth, and Mary had vivid memories of their mother’s nerves that had once driven Mrs. Bennet around Longbourn to the distress of Mr. Bennet, the servants and her elder daughters. Kitty and Lydia had vague memories of these events from years before, and they were surprised and then concerned by their mother’s vapours.
Mrs. Bennet rallied however when she became aware that her daughters were distressed by these episodes. On Saturday before Mr. Collins was to arrive, the Bennet ladies gathered in the parlour and discussed how Mr. Bennet would have responded to the letter from his cousin.
“Your father would have anticipated his cousin’s arrival with great interest and made a plan to study Mr. Collin’s character,” Mrs. Bennet said.
“Would Papa laugh aloud?” asked Lydia.
“Our father often laughs with his eyes,” Elizabeth told her youngest sister.
Lydia appeared thoughtful for long moment and she tilted her head and looked at her mother. “Father laughed at me many times then when I thought he was ignoring me. When I complained about a lesson or begged for a new gown, he would give me a strange answer that I could not understand, but there was always a twinkle in his eye!”
++**++
On the appointed day, the rector and his wife arrived at Longbourn for tea and joined the ladies as they waited for the arrival of their guest. At three of the clock, horse’s hooves were heard on the gravel drive and the Bennet family was surprised when Mr. Hill announced, “Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy.”
Mrs. Bennet rose to welcome her guests and invite them to join her family for tea.
“Forgive our sudden arrival Mrs. Bennet,” Mr. Bingley begged. “We are returning from Mr. Fielding’s stables where we were looking at horses for Netherfield. As we approached the gate to Longbourn, Mr. Darcy mentioned the excellent tarts you serve at tea every afternoon. We beg to impose upon you.”
Glancing at Jane’s smiling face; Mrs. Bennet welcomed the two visitors. “Please join us gentlemen. May I introduce our rector, Mr. Fallows?”
“We have met Mr. Fallows at the shooting party at Lucas Lodge,” Mr. Darcy replied. “And we met again when we had shooting here at Longbourn.”
“And we have attended services each Sunday at the church here in Longbourn,” Mr. Bingley added. “But it is very pleasant to meet Mrs. Fallows.”
Darcy and Bingley both bowed to the rector’s wife and she curtsied in return, smiling brightly at their notice. Tea was served and the hour passed quickly before the sound of a small carriage and horse were heard in the drive again.
Collins was excessively polite and the family received him affably. The ladies and gentlemen were ready enough to talk, and Mr. Collins seemed neither in need of encouragement, nor inclined to be silent himself. He was a tall, heavy-looking young man of five-and-twenty. His air was grave and stately, and his manners were very formal though he ignored the introductions to Mr. Bingley, Mr. Darcy and the Fallows.
Mrs. Bennet called for more tea to serve Mr. Collins and he had not been long seated with a cup before he began h
is compliments by saying, “Mrs. Bennet, I have heard much of the beauty of your daughters, but that in this instance fame falls short of the truth. I do doubt you seeing them all in due time disposed of in marriage.”
Bingley, Darcy and Mr. and Mrs. Fallows watched the visitor with new interest while the Bennet ladies blushed at Mr. Collin’s impropriety, everyone wondering how he had heard of the appearance of the Bennet sisters. Not in the house for ten minutes, Mr. Collins had already garnered more attention than he expected.
Mrs. Bennet replied, “You are very kind, I am sure; but my daughters will not seek husbands merely to enter the matrimonial state, Mr. Collins.”
“And you have no fear of the entail of this estate?” he inquired.
“I do not fear it sir. It is difficult for my poor girls but I do not mean to find fault with you, for such things I know are all chance in this world. There is no knowing how estates will go once they come to be entailed.”
“I am very sensible, madam, of the hardship to my fair cousins, and could say much on the subject, but that I am cautious of appearing forward and precipitate. But I can assure the young ladies that I come prepared to admire them. At present, I will not say more; but, perhaps, when we are better acquainted…”
The conversation paused for a moment as no one responded to the innuendo he thought was a bon mot. Looking about the room once more, Mr. Collins asked, “And where is my cousin, Mr. Bennet? Did he not expect me today?”
“My father is absent from home Mr. Collins,” Jane explained. “He has travelled to Antigua in the West Indies on a business matter.”
“The West Indies?” Mr. Collins exclaimed. “Does Mr. Bennet have business concerns in the West Indies? I did not know that Longbourn was so involved.”
“The investments in the West Indies are not part and parcel of the estate, Mr. Collins,” Elizabeth explained. “I am certain you understand that our father has grown his personal holdings as well as our mother’s dowry these twenty-five years since he inherited the estate.”
Follies and Nonsense Page 17
