Southern Myths

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Southern Myths Page 3

by Amy Boyles


  Ew. Was this guy insinuating what I think he was insinuating?

  I was so not interested in that sort of agreement.

  Not even to win back a dragon.

  I cleared my throat. “Okay. Um. Well…what was it my mother wanted to tell me? What couldn’t she say in public?”

  The door opened and Gretchen Gargoyle, the women I’d ticked off in her shop, entered. When she saw me her eyes narrowed to slitty wedges of death.

  “Mysterio, we’re going to be late,” she said.

  He took my hand and said, “I must be off, but I will tell you what she said soon.” I felt him wedge a slip of paper into my palm. He turned toward Gretchen. “Darling, let’s be off.”

  With that, Mysterio left me alone in the room to wonder what it was my mother had wanted me to know.

  I glanced at the dragon. My fingers itched to take him, to grab him. I licked my lips, trying to figure out if I could get away with stealing him.

  Wow. Where had my morals gone?

  Of course, I’d leave a check for him, so it’s not like I’d just take the creature.

  But still. That might cause problems. Deciding I’d find another way to get the dragon, I turned to go.

  “Mama,” it said.

  I closed my eyes. The door opened and Betty waddled through. “Great. You got the dragon. Let’s get out of here.”

  I shook my head. “He won’t sell it. Though I’m pretty sure he’ll accept sexual favors if I’m willing to offer them.”

  “No good Southern granddaughter of mine’s going to give away her body. You’re too young. Now someone like me?”

  I rubbed my head. “Don’t go there.”

  “I’m not,” Betty said, pushing up her sleeves. “What I was going to say is—someone like me might do a little influencing, get him to hand the dragon over. In fact, I might be able to get Mysterio to think the whole thing was his idea.”

  I frowned. “How?”

  Betty clapped her hands. When she opened them, the canister filled with protection liquid appeared in her palm. She spritzed some on the cage.

  “I thought that was for us.”

  “On humans, it works to keep your head screwed on straight. But on animals, it works differently.”

  “How?”

  “Mysterio will start to think that this sweet little dragon isn’t as sweet as he originally thought.”

  I tipped my head. “What do you mean?”

  “The spray will make the dragon appear evil, mean. By this time tomorrow, Mysterio will be begging you to take the dragon from him.” Betty smiled widely. “Just you wait and see.”

  She turned to leave. I followed behind and unfolded the slip of paper Mysterio had given me. It listed an address, room number and time—tomorrow at eight pm. Hopefully, by then I’d know two things: the first was what my mother had wanted to tell me and the second was how much getting the dragon back would cost.

  I spent the next day keeping myself busy at work. I cracked my knuckles to the point they wouldn’t crack anymore, which was saying a lot.

  Basically, I stared at the clock all day, willing it to be eight so that I could meet up with Mysterio.

  “Hey there,” came a gruff voice.

  I glanced up to see Axel standing in the doorway. I’d been so consumed with my thoughts I hadn’t heard him enter.

  “Hey, yourself.”

  He leaned a hip against a counter, crossed his arms and gazed at me with such a deep look my knees jellied. “So did you go see Mysterio last night?”

  I tucked loose strands of crimson and honey hair behind an ear. “I did. How’d you know?”

  He smiled. “Half the town went.”

  “But not you.”

  He shook his head. “That man’s not going to tell me anything I don’t already know.”

  I shrugged. “You don’t know until you know.”

  “But you also don’t know what you don’t know until you don’t know it.”

  “Stop trying to outdo me.”

  Axel chuckled. “Done. So. Want to grab dinner tonight? I know this great little nook that serves the best fried chicken around.”

  “Oh? We going to Betty’s house?”

  He laughed again. “No.”

  I shot him a teasing smile. Axel placed a hand on the counter, effectively blocking my path. Musk and pine trickled from his shirt to my nose.

  “I’d love to eat fried chicken but only if you come with me to meet Mysterio. I need to get back my dragon.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Now you’ve decided you need it?”

  “It might help fight off Rufus.”

  He jumped on the counter and sat. “Done.”

  A flicker caught my eye. I peered around Axel and saw Mysterio walking down the street. A leggy blonde had her arm wrapped around his.

  “Boy this guy gets around,” I said.

  Axel hopped off the counter and came around. He placed a hand on my shoulder. “Mysterio? Guy’s got a girl in every town.”

  “Or two,” I said. “I saw him with Gretchen Gargoyle last night.” I motioned to the couple. “Who’s the blonde?”

  Axel frowned. “Why’re you asking me?”

  “Because you’re the only private detective I know in town.”

  He nodded. “Good point. The blonde is Hattie Hollypop. She owns the jewelry store—Brews and Jewels.”

  “Brews and Jewels?”

  “They also serve beer,” he said.

  I laughed. “Original.”

  Axel held my gaze and I started to feel the tension rise around us. It was like a cloud of electric pressure building and thickening. I tried to breathe, but I was mesmerized by Axel’s glance.

  I waited as his head dipped toward me.

  The bell above the door tinkled. I jerked and found Betty Craple striding in. “I was walking past and saw you two about to kiss.”

  I practically jumped as far from Axel as I could get. “So you figured you’d ruin the moment.”

  “Right,” she said proudly.

  Axel dragged his gaze from Betty to me. “See you tonight.”

  I waved as he left. As soon as he disappeared down the street, Betty straightened her wig. “Now that my work here is done, I’ll be going.”

  “Thanks,” I said. “See you at the house.”

  I got home late afternoon. Betty had dinner on the table, but I did my best to ignore the scents of turnip greens, butter beans, cornbread and country ham. Saliva nearly poured from my mouth as I gazed at the spread.

  “Come on and chow down,” Betty said. “Your cousins should be home soon.”

  I shook my head. “No thanks. I’ve got dinner plans.”

  She grabbed a skillet from the fireplace and laid it on the table. “Suit yourself, but you’re missing one fine meal.”

  “I know.”

  The door banged open and Cordelia stomped in. Her long hair was plastered to her forehead. She dumped her purse on the floor and sank into a chair.

  “You look beat,” I said.

  Cordelia slicked her matted tresses. “I am. Everything was going fine at the inn and then suddenly we all had to rush around.”

  “Why?” I said.

  “Mysterio decided to check out. And he always brings tons of luggage and requires extra care.”

  I stopped. “Wait. Mysterio’s leaving? Why’s he leaving? He can’t leave.”

  Cordelia shrugged. “He is. Right now.”

  I threw Betty a panicked look. “But he’s got the dragon and the message from my mom. He can’t go.”

  Cordelia crossed one leg over the other and yanked off her shoe. “Well, if you want to catch him you’d better hurry, ‘cause like I said, he’s checking out.”

  In a flicker, all my expectations were dashed. The message from my mother—gone. The thing that could protect me from Rufus—also gone. Mysterio the mysterious, who had walked into my life yesterday was now about to leave with the knowledge I desperately needed.

  I glanced a
t Betty. “You ready to get Mysterio?”

  She winked at me. “Let’s roll.”

  FIVE

  We reached the inn about five minutes later. Had to love Magnolia Cove. Most places were moments away from most other places. The town was so small, if you threw a chicken leg, you were liable to either hit a person or a building.

  That’s a good old-fashioned Southern witticism for you.

  Betty had pulled on her running shoes. She wore white nurse-type tights and a floral print dress. She clipped along at a pretty good rate, keeping pace with me.

  “Where do you think he is?” I said, inhaling a deep breath. “If Mysterio’s still here.”

  Betty sniffed the air. She cocked one eye toward the rear of the parking lot. “I caught a whiff of cheap cologne and lipstick coming from the Dumpsters.”

  “Lipstick?”

  She laid a beady eye of superiority on me. “Kissing,” she said, as if that explained it all.

  In a way, I guess it did.

  We raced to the rear, where I saw Mysterio inspecting his vehicle’s tires. A van with a giant bobbing black hat on top and the words EXPERIENCE THE MYSTERIOUS scribbled on the side idled quietly.

  Mysterio saw us. He backed away. “Here, you can take this thing,” he said. He yanked open the van door and thrust his hands inside. When they reappeared, Mysterio was holding a gilded cage. The baby dragon opened its mouth. A spark lit and a small stream of fire erupted from its throat before petering into smoke.

  I leaned over and shot Betty an I-told-you-so look. What did I say about the creature?

  Dangerous.

  Mysterio shoved the cage in my arms. “It’s trying to kill me. Take it. You can have it. I don’t want the thing. I’ve got to get out of here before it kills me.”

  I handed the cage to Betty, who immediately started cooing at the dragon. Not kidding. She sounded like a new mother soothing a baby to sleep.

  Mysterio hopped in the driver’s side. The black hat atop the van teetered on a loose spring.

  I grabbed hold of his arm through the open window. “Wait. I need you to tell me what my mother said. What she told you last night. I have to know.”

  Mysterio threw the side of his cape over one shoulder. “Your mother?”

  “Yes,” I said. “Sassafras.”

  His face lighted as if he suddenly remembered. “Yes.” His lips curved into a slow winding smile that made my stomach lurch. “Yes, I wrote it on a sheet of paper.”

  Hope zinged through my body. He hadn’t left and whatever my mother wanted to me to know was somewhere.

  “Where?” I said.

  He opened his mouth to answer and I leaned in, a thousand cells of anticipation floating through my body. Without warning, the cape draped over his shoulders suddenly wrapped itself around Mysterio and started to smother him.

  “Help,” he yelled.

  I grabbed hold of the fabric, trying to rip it away, but it held fast. I glanced at Betty. “What can you do?”

  Betty placed a thumb over her nostril and exhaled. A snort of sparkles shot through the air, landing on the cloak.

  I yanked, but the fabric squeezed him tight.

  “It’s not helping,” I said.

  Betty put the cage down and rubbed her hands together. A shower of magical streamers flew through the air onto Mysterio. Inside the cape, I could hear him gasping for air.

  I pulled again, but the cape didn’t loosen.

  “It’s not working.”

  I tugged the door open and Mysterio slumped to the asphalt. He kicked and bucked as I yanked, trying to pry him loose. Pain ripped up my hand as fingernails broke.

  “Help,” I yelled.

  “Help,” Betty yelled.

  I buried my fingers deep in the fabric and used my body weight to tear the cape away. The fabric gave, and I skidded across the ground.

  My rear end burned. I rose and rubbed it.

  “You ripped a hole in your jeans,” Betty said.

  “Nothing a little magic can’t fix,” I said. I slowly made my way over to Mysterio, hoping to find him gasping for breath.

  Instead, I glanced onto blue skin and sightless, glazed eyes.

  “Well, looks like Mysterio bit the dust,” Betty said. “Death by cape. Not pretty at all.”

  “No, it’s not,” I said. “But how? What happened?”

  “Someone killed him,” came a voice from behind.

  I glanced over my shoulder and saw the new sheriff in town—Garrick Young. He was a tall drink of water with dark brown hair and eyes. He pinched two fingers over the rim of his hat and slid them down.

  “How do you know someone killed him?” I said, rising.

  Garrick looked me up and down. “Because folks don’t commit suicide using their capes to kill them.” His dark gaze hit me hard, sending a spear of anxiety straight to my core. “And standing over his body I find the two of you. The same two ladies I found standing over a body only about a week ago.”

  I cringed. “Are you saying this doesn’t look good?”

  Garrick dipped his head and stared at me out from under the rim of his hat. “I’m saying it doesn’t look good at all.”

  SIX

  Betty sat next to me at the station. The caged baby dragon rested on her lap while I twiddled my thumbs, waiting for a Christmas miracle to save us because this did not look good.

  At all.

  I wondered if crossing my fingers would make a Christmas miracle come sooner rather than later.

  “We’re going to need a miracle,” Betty said.

  “I was just thinking that.”

  She leaned over. “But at least you got the dragon.”

  I rested my head on the wall. “I guess your potion worked.”

  She sniffed. “You guess?”

  “Okay. Your potion worked. That animal breathes fire and it isn’t even housebroken.”

  She patted my hand. “Don’t worry. I know the best dragon tamer in these parts.”

  I cocked a brow at that. “You do? Who?”

  “Name’s Barry.”

  I barked out a laugh so hard tears stung my eyes. I choked as I tried to calm myself.

  Betty eyed me disdainfully. In other words, her expression twisted as if the worst smell in the world had settled in front of her face. “I take it you don’t approve of his name.”

  I knuckled a fresh tear from my eyelash. “I’m sorry but Barry the Dragon Tamer is not who I’d expect to help me with this little guy.”

  Betty sniffed. “Not everyone can be named Fabio.”

  I broke out into another set of giggles. When I finally got hold of myself, I shook my head. “Fabio’s not a good name, either.”

  “What name does sound good for a dragon tamer?”

  I scratched my chin. “Um…Axel?”

  “You’re biased.”

  “I suppose so.”

  A door opened and Garrick stuck his head out. He motioned for us to come inside. Betty walked in front of me, still holding the cage.

  We entered the office. Stacks of papers rimmed Garrick’s desk, and numerous glass awards sat on the shelves behind him.

  “Did you see anyone with Mysterio?” he said after we’d sat.

  I shook my head. “No one.”

  He glanced at Betty. “As the girl said.”

  “Did he say if he’d talked to anyone?”

  “No,” I said. “He was in a hurry to leave, but he didn’t say it was because of any one person. But I mean, heck, it’s a town full of witches. Everyone can do magic. They might’ve evaporated right before we showed up.”

  Betty cocked an eye at me. “Evaporated?”

  I winked at her. “Yep. Went poof.”

  Garrick scraped his fingers down his face. “And where’d the dragon come from?”

  Betty’s pouched out her lips defiantly. “This here creature belongs to Pepper fair and square. Her Uncle Donovan ordered it for her. She sold it to Mysterio before she realized the importance of the creatu
re, but Mysterio returned it.”

  “Right before he died,” I added. “He handed the dragon over. We didn’t steal it. I don’t steal. I really don’t believe in it. I might’ve thought about stealing the dragon when Mysterio wouldn’t originally return it to me, but I didn’t because I’m a good Southern gal and my dad raised me right. So that means I don’t steal. No sir.”

  Garrick stared at me for about five beats before his jaw dropped and a glazed look of confusion spread over his face. “So let me get this straight. You found Mysterio in an alley, he handed you the dragon and then the cape attacked and killed him.”

  I swung one leg over the opposite knee. “Sounds about right. Oh, and I tried to save him. I didn’t want him to die. I never want anyone to die. Dying is not good.”

  He stared at me blankly.

  I sat on my hands to keep from twisting my fingers together. “I talk when I get nervous.”

  “Do you have something to be nervous about?”

  I shook my head. “No. Nothing to be nervous about. Not really. No. Maybe it’s because you’re so tall and I’m just average.”

  “But we’re sitting.”

  I nodded. “I know. It doesn’t make any sense, I realize. It just is.”

  “Is there anything else you ladies would like to add to your statements?”

  I shook my head of hair, letting some of the strands fall on my face. “Nope. Nothing.”

  Betty nodded. “Same here. I’ve told you coppers everything you need to know.”

  Garrick’s lips tipped into an amused smile. He rose and gestured toward the door. “Thank you, ladies. We’ll be in contact if there’s more we need help with.”

  Betty huffed all the way outside. “Coppers always getting into my business and things. All of them. Every one.”

  “I think you’re exaggerating.” I glanced at my watch and realized I was supposed to have had dinner with Axel. I palmed my forehead and exhaled in defeat. “Oh no. Axel doesn’t know we were at the police station. He’ll think I stood him up.”

  “Where’s your phone?” Betty said.

  I grimaced. “It must be at the house. We dashed out, remember?”

  Betty handed the cage to me. “Here. You’re younger and stronger than me.”

 

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