by R. J. Scott
“I don’t believe you.” Nate crossed his arms.
Jared froze. “Which part?”
“About doing as you’re told. Because if you did, then why would you think they’d fire you?” He pursed his lips. When was the last time he’d teased someone other than Luka?
“Ah, I did say that didn’t I.”
“You did.”
Jared downed what was left of his beer. “There may have been a few mistakes along the way. But I swear, they’re always done with the best of intentions. I’m just too nice. Or so people keep telling me.” He chuckled and turned the empty bottle so the label was facing Nate.
Nice, huh?
“I guess you are.” Nate glanced along the bar to where Abi was serving a group. He turned back and met Jared’s eyes. “But I wouldn’t say it’s a bad thing.”
“Exactly. I didn’t think so either. But again, probably not what my boss would say. There was this whole thing with a swan.”
“Should I even ask?”
“Best if you don’t.” He grinned.
“Just answer me one thing. Is the swan okay?”
“Yeah. Or at least it was as I watched it waddle into the sunset with a hotel guest’s shoe gripped firmly in its beak.”
“Shoe? So many questions.”
Laughing, Jared rested his folded arms on the edge of the bar. “Speaking of questions. I had one for you.”
“Really?”
Jared nodded.
“Okay. Go on.”
“I wanted to invite you out for dinner. You and Luka,” he quickly added.
“Both of us?”
“Yeah. I wanted to talk to you some more, get to know you, as friends, and well, Luka’s a big part of that. But if you think that’s too weird, then…”
Nate narrowed his eyes. He studied Jared, his expression, his body language. Was this him being too nice? “It’s not weird. I’m surprised, that’s all.” Even if Nate had been willing to open his heart to any of the men he had slept with since Rhea, he was sure very few would have stuck around for long. He didn’t want to call Luka baggage, but that’s what he would have been seen as.
“Then, what do you think? Would you like to? We could get burgers again, or is there somewhere Luka enjoys going?”
Somewhere Luka enjoys?
“You really are a nice guy.”
“Huh?”
“Nothing.” He clenched his fists, noting the feel of his ring between his tensed fingers. There were things he regretted about the past. Moments he should have acted upon. Hindsight was a bitch.
“So, dinner?”
“On one condition.”
Jared sucked on his teeth. “Which is?”
“Instead of going out, let me cook.”
“Are you sure you’re okay with that?”
“In what way?”
“It’s your home. Are you sure it’s okay for me to be there?”
Nate dismissed Jared’s concerns. “Why wouldn’t it be? I’m inviting a friend over for dinner.” He relaxed his arms at his side. “You wanted to get to know me and Luka better. This way you can. But if you don’t feel comfortable—”
“I’ll come,” Jared interrupted. “I didn’t want you to feel you had to invite me, is all. But I want to have dinner with you both.”
Would Luka smile when Nate told him?
Nate’s lips twitched.
Was it okay for him to smile, too?
“Are you free Sunday evening? Around five.”
Jared took a moment, but eventually agreed. “Sure.”
“Is there anything you don’t eat? Allergies or anything?”
Jared shook his head. “None that I know of.”
“Great. So, Sunday at five.”
“Yes. Do you want me to bring anything with me?”
“Other than an empty stomach, I don’t think so.”
“I can do that,” Jared said.
“Great,” Nate said again. It was then panic started to set in. When was the last time he’d cooked for someone else? Luka was a child, easy to impress, easy to please. “Okay, I’m going to put this out there. Please don’t go expecting some five-star dining when you come over.”
“I won’t.”
“I’m not saying I’m bad. I’m not going to poison you or anything, but I’m completely average when it comes to the kitchen. I mean it’s totally edible and—”
“It’ll be fine.” Jared’s words helped ease Nate’s anxiety. “I’m good with anything.”
“Really?”
Jared rested his elbows on the bar. His cheeks puffing a little he held his head in his hands and met Nate’s eyes. He gave a warm smile as he said, “Really.”
Nate returned his smile. Heat spread through his body as he held Jared’s gaze, and for the first time in a long time, there was something to look forward to.
I wish it was already Sunday.
Chapter Nine
Jared was never happier to see the back of a Saturday. He’d spent from six a.m. right up until eleven at night studying until his eyes crossed, broken only by Ethan forcing snacks into his hand and demanding he eat and drink. By the time he’d fallen into bed he was convinced he was going to forget everything he’d learned. Exams loomed, and if he didn’t pass them then he was fucked, and not the good kind of fucked.
There was no way he wasn’t going to pass, even if it meant putting in more days like yesterday, just as long as he didn’t miss out on down time and in particular, one thing that had kept him going all week—dinner with Nate and Luka. He’d studied until three, and then he gave himself a full hour to get ready to head out. Like him and Ethan, Nate and Luka lived in Queens, but that was where the similarity ended. Nate had a place in Bay Ridge, a more family oriented place that had way lower rents than near the bar but was still more expensive than where Jared and Ethan lived. He didn’t know the address and had to look it up to check he left with time to spare. His first idea was to walk the twelve blocks to Nate’s place, but that meant less time to study, so a cab it was. He could always walk home.
After the shower he then had to decide what to wear. He hadn’t had this much trouble since his senior prom, and his forays out to the living room where Ethan nursed a soda as he watched a documentary about meerkats, were getting more erratic.
“You’re sure about the red.”
“Yes, Jared, I’m sure about the red.”
“But the blue—”
“If you ask me one more time for my opinion I will be forced to lock you out of your bedroom so you can’t spend any more time in the closet.” Ethan chuckled. “See what I did there?”
“Ha freaking ha, asshole.”
“I’m the asshole? It’s not me who keeps interrupting me and my weekly Discovery catchup. Anyway,” he lifted his laptop, “I have work, so can you be quieter with your whole diva breakdown?”
Jared sighed heavily and padded back to his open closet, eyeing the complete destruction of his once organized room—books and study material, and clothes strewn across the floor. At least he hadn’t touched his rent-a-boyfriend clothes. These were fancy tuxes and suits that Bryant & Waites supplied him with, and the latest one had arrived yesterday, all ready for the next booking, which would refill his waning pot of cash.
As long as I don’t lose my shit and mess it up.
He did one last turn in front of the full-length mirror. Nice jeans that showed off his ass, check. Clean scarlet T-shirt without a single crease, check. Clean-shaven with no cuts, nicks, or missed bits. Check, check and check.
Jacket on, he grabbed his wallet, noogied Ethan on his way past, only just escaping as his roommate tried to catch him to get him back, and then he slipped on his coat at the door, pocketed his keys and thought about what he might have forgotten.
“It’s on the counter,” Ethan called.
“What?”
“The wine you were just about to forget, idiot!”
Jared rolled his eyes at himself. He got the wine and did one m
ore run through. Tonight was a big night in more ways than one. He wanted to get to know Nate and Luka, and much like the meerkats on the television right now, he was desperate to learn about the family dynamics. Luka clearly adored his dad, enough to think of hiring him a friend. Luka was smart, funny, sweet, and just the right mix of naive and super smart, which Jared loved in his nieces and nephews. Jared’s siblings called him a big kid, and maybe they were right because he really felt a connection to Luka. Then there was Nate. Big, strong, sexy, vulnerable, dark-eyed Nate with the weight of the world on his shoulders, and his cautious smile.
Tonight Jared wanted to see a smile with no worries lurking in the shadows, to see Nate with his defenses lowered.
He also hoped he’d get to spend some time with Nate on his own, a glass of wine, good food, maybe even a kiss.
Kissing Nate was his current obsession and the first thing that slipped into his mind in between writing essays and reading notes.
“You forgot the ice cream,” Ethan added when Jared opened the front door.
Fuck my life.
The chocolate ice cream bought especially for Luka because he’d loved it at the restaurant. Jared had gone out of his way, made a trip to Van Leeuwen’s just to get the best he could, and had a tub of it in the small freezer. He took out the ice cream, pushed it into his backpack and that was it, nothing else to delay him, so job done—he called out a thank-you to Ethan then headed downstairs, hailing a cab. The journey wasn’t long, but it gave him a chance to calm down from the whole what-he-should-wear debacle, and by the time the cab stopped outside the apartment block they lived in, he was just leveled out at excited.
He pressed the button to get buzzed in, a disembodied voice telling him to come right up, and he headed up to the third floor, the door already open and Luka waiting for him, a wide grin on his face.
“Dad burned the ’sagna, but it was okay,” Luka announced, and held out his hand palm up, some coins sitting there. “For tonight,” he added under his breath.
“I didn’t burn it,” Nate called from somewhere inside. “It’s crispy! And let him in Luka.”
Jared didn’t want the coins, but Luka thrust them at him and almost dropped them as he did.
“Luka, you don’t need to—”
“Jared! Hey.” Nate appeared behind his son, and Jared smoothly pocketed the coins. Nate was a sight for sore eyes, dark jeans, a grey sweater with a lighter thread in it, his hair still damp, and a dishtowel over his shoulder.
“Hi.” Jared didn’t know what else to say or do, because all he could think was how had he forgotten every detail of Nate so badly to now be struck dumb. Was he supposed to shake Nate’s hand, or hug him, or maybe push him against the nearest wall and kiss the life out of him? Scratch that, the last thing was not on the agenda.
“Come in. Luka, let Jared in.”
Jared shrugged off his backpack and out of his coat, adding it to the ones on the hooks inside the small entry hall. Right next to the coats was a corkboard, and it had a load of notes posted and a calendar with days colored in with different highlighters. Nate must have noticed Jared glancing at it because he pulled Luka in for a side hug and huffed a laugh.
“We live a complicated life,” he explained.
“I wasn’t… I didn’t mean to… I brought wine.” It wasn’t like him to trip over his words, but Nate smelled so good, if a little smoky, and Luka was staring up at him expectantly. “And this is for you.” He passed the tub of ice-cream to Luka.
“All for me?” Luka asked with wide eyes.
“Yeah.”
“I’mma getting a spoon,” he announced, but Nate beat him too it, grabbing the tub and holding it high and out of Luka’s reach.
“After dinner,” he announced with a secret smile.
“But you burned dinner,” Luka whined.
“I did not burn it, as I said, it’s just a little crispy and I got rid of the bit that was uhmm… too crispy.”
“Burned,” Luka muttered under his breath, then headed through another door and into a wide open living space.
“Make yourself at home and I’ll get a glass.” He gestured with the wine.
Jared didn’t follow him out of the main room, he hadn’t been asked to... Maybe Nate didn’t want to share the origin of the burning incident. So, Jared stayed where he was and Luka immediately started giving him a guided tour, which consisted of him pointing out the sofa, the window, the TV, and his room. As he was tugged around he noticed just how many photos were on display—they were everywhere, cataloguing every single stage of Luka’s life from baby to what seemed like recent shots, and in the corner, right by the door to Luka’s bedroom, there was a photo of Nate, his arms around a heavily pregnant woman.
“That’s my mom. She was called Rhea, like the bar,” Luka said.
“I remember your dad said that. You look a lot like her,” Jared observed, and he wasn’t lying. Even though Luka was a mini-Nate in a lot of ways, he could see Rhea’s beautiful smile in Luka.
“She was very pretty.”
“She was beautiful.”
“She was,” Nate said from behind them, and Jared turned to face him, feeling guilty for having been staring at Rhea. “She had a beautiful soul, and we miss her.”
Jared examined Nate’s expression, a hazard of his studies, and yes he saw grief, but he also saw pride. He wanted to say something profound, but he didn’t get the chance because Nate smiled at him and offered a glass.
“Nice wine,” he murmured and took a sip. “I don’t get to drink much wine, just a ton of spirits.” He shook his head. “I sound like an alcoholic.”
“I knew what you meant.”
“I need to write about chickens,” Luka announced, “can I go finish my homework?” He blinked at his dad so innocently, but Jared got the feeling that he was just giving his dad alone time to be with his new friend. He bet it never occurred to Luka that Jared wanted to kiss Nate though, or be more than friends. Maybe even boyfriends? That was a bridge they would cross when they got to it—if he and Nate got to it.
“Hang on bud, you’re voluntarily going to do homework?” Nate touched Luka’s forehead. “Are you feeling okay?”
If looks could kill, then Nate would’ve been on the floor, not breathing, but when Luka flounced off with a muttered something or other Nate was grinning, and the love for his son was front and center.
“So, how’s the bar?” Jared began the one conversation he knew would carry on and maybe lead into other things, because he couldn’t think of anything else.
“The suppliers liked the report and they put me up a level in approved discounts.”
“That’s cool.”
“And college?” It was Nate’s turn to cover the basics.
“Too much studying, too much debt,” Jared quipped.
Then they stared at each other, and Jared considered what it would be like to step into Nate’s space and kiss him. For the longest moment he wondered if maybe Nate was thinking the same thing, and then he cleared his throat and went through the door to the kitchen.
“Hungry?” he asked over his shoulder, and Jared followed him, not into a scene of chaos with burned lasagna and dishes everywhere, but to an oasis of calm. “Sorry about the table, it was Luka’s idea, and he’s already eaten a whole pile of what he calls burned lasagna, so it’s just us.”
Jared hadn’t even noticed the tiny table tucked into the corner, laid with placemats and hand-drawn name plates, and in the center a vase filled with paper flowers, but now he’d seen it he couldn’t un-see it.
Because to him it was as if Luka had set it for a romantic dinner.
So maybe Jared didn’t need to worry about what Luka thought about him kissing Nate at all.
Chapter Ten
What’s with this setup?
Nate sipped his wine, eying the small bunch of paper roses Luka had tricked him into making with him earlier that afternoon.
“I want to give them as a present to Lee,”
Luka had said.
When Luka had asked for a vase, Nate had thought nothing of it. It wasn’t until he’d walked into the kitchen and found Luka fussing over the table settings that he pointed out the lie. In response, Luka had calmly said he hadn’t lied. He would give them to Lee tomorrow, but they could be used as way of a table decoration in the meantime.
He glanced at Jared opposite him. It was the two of them.
Why is it only the two of us?
The scene was too intimate. Too much just Jared and him. Alone. Together. This wasn’t the plan. Luka had been talking about Jared and dinner on and off all weekend and now Jared was here, Luka had dipped. Without a single prompt from Nate, he had taken himself away to finish homework that wasn’t due until the end of the week.
What was that about?
The meal was supposed to be for the three of them— Luka, him and Jared. A family dinner. A friends dinner? Whatever it was called, it was meant to be a meal for three. Nate felt cheated somehow. Conspired against.
Nate lowered his glass.
Sure, dinner might be a little awkward, a little too cozy. But it was what it was. They were here, together and as much as the thought of it being the two of them made Nate want to run, fling open Luka’s bedroom door and drag him back to the table, he had to admit it wasn’t completely terrible being only him and Jared. It was comfortable, relaxing, easy.
Should it be this easy being around somebody? Somebody like Jared?
“Don’t force yourself,” Nate said, breaking the silence they had fallen into between bites of dinner. He leaned back in his seat. “You don’t have to finish it.”
Jared met Nate’s eyes over the fork full of food he held up. “Why wouldn’t I?” Jared filled his mouth, chewed. He raised his hand, covering his lips as he mumbled, “It’s good.”
Nate chuckled. “Is this you being too nice right now?”
Jared shook his head. “Of course not. But you’re acting like it’s the worst lasagna ever made. You should try living at my place. I conveniently find myself having other plans when it’s my roommate’s turn to cook. That or suggest getting takeout.”
