by Roxie Ray
“Why me?” I couldn’t help but ask. “There are other men on this ship, Savii, if you insist on going down this route. You are a gorgeous, desirable thing. Not a single one of them would hesitate at your offer.”
“Why are you hesitating now?” She clasped my arm, leaning forward. I could smell perfume on her skin, something soft and floral that only enhanced the deliciousness of her natural scene. “You have been kinder to me than any other, Coplan. Kinder than anyone has been in all my life.”
“It was my job,” I breathed. But breathing was dangerous now. With every breath I took, I breathed her in and drove myself half-mad for the privilege.
“It was more than that.” Her eyes were steely, but there was a dark, sultry beauty behind them that I could sense easily, even if they did not change color as mine did. Longing. Need. Want. “You rescued me. You fought for me. You saved me, not just from the Rutharians. From myself, too. For so long in that cell they kept me in, I felt like a monster—and now, you call me beautiful? If I’m so gorgeous and desirable, why don’t you want me?”
“I do.” The words leapt from my lips before I could stop them. My lips pulled back in a snarl, though whether it was anger or frustration or something else—something more sensual and wild and fierce—I did not know. “I do want you, Savii. So much it hurts.”
“Kiss me, then,” she pleaded. Her lips hovered over mine, teasing me. Damning me. Begging to be crushed beneath my own. “Touch me. I need it. Didn’t you tell me that? That Lunarian healing demanded touch?”
“Savii…”
“Whenever the time comes, I’ll lose all of this, Coplan. I’ll lose my memories. I’ll lose all of the hurt and heartache. I’ll lose you, and I won’t even remember enough to regret it.” Her eyes glistened with tears that did not fall. “I need it all to mean something. Even if I forget.”
“I cannot give you what you need, Savii,” I protested softly, and hated myself for it. It was a lie. I knew what she was asking, and I could give it to her in an instant if I only allowed myself. I yearned to. My body ached with the need of her, her hips beneath mine, her skin against my skin, but—
“I only need you, Coplan,” she whispered against my lips. “Just give me tonight.”
Something broke in me then. There was a fine line between warrior and beast, and her words, her scent, her beauty—it shattered the glass veil between the two in a burst of diamonds and dust.
I did not remember rising until I was already on my feet. I did not recall taking her wrists in my hands until I had already forced them down, holding her body captive against my own.
I did not remember kissing her until she was already over my shoulder, my lips bruised and aching as the taste of her tongue lingered on my own.
She had been denied so much for all her life. Agency. Pleasure. Love. All of this and more I could give to her—
And if she truly wanted it, then I could not bear to hold myself back any longer.
13
Savannah
Coplan threw me to the bed with a ferocious growl. I bounced on the mattress when I hit it and immediately pushed myself up, bracing my back against the headboard.
“This is what you want, Savii?” Coplan tore his shirt open, shrugged it off while panting, and tossed it to the floor. “Is this what you desire?”
His chest was perfectly sculpted, like the white marble of a statue in a museum painted a warm, deep orange in the low light cast into the dark bedroom through the door. His claws were long and sharp, his fangs bared and dangerous-looking…but his eyes were such a deep, delicious blue that I wasn’t afraid.
Not of him.
“Yes,” I breathed, nodding enthusiastically. Maybe he wanted me to be scared. Maybe my body thought it was. My heart was thrumming against my ribcage like a wild animal in a trap and my every sense was on high alert—but by now, I knew what fear felt like. When I searched for it inside myself, the fear didn’t come. My eyes widened with excitement as he stood at the foot of the bed, shoulders heaving. I wasn’t scared at all. “I want this. I want you.”
“Then you will have me, vringna.” Coplan’s fingers, agile and practiced from surgery, unclasped his belt with ease. He whipped it off and threw it down as well before he moved for the laces on his pants. “You will have all of me, and we will both be damned for it.”
I licked my lips eagerly as he tugged the laces apart. He shoved them down and his underwear along with them, kicking off his boots and stepping out of them in such a fierce, fluid series of motions that, if he hadn’t told me himself that he was a virgin, I would have figured he’d practiced with other women a hundred times before.
His cock sprang out, stiff and pointing straight at me. It was so gorgeous, my breath caught in my throat. It was as orange as the rest of him, with a deeper, darker color at its flat, flared tip. He was…huge. There was no other word for it. Coplan’s cock was long and thick, nothing like anything I’d ever seen before.
For a moment, I could only stare.
I knew I’d asked for this, but he was big enough that I didn’t know how he was even going to fit.
I didn’t care. I’d make him fit. I reached for the straps of my nightgown, sliding them downward over my arms. Standing naked there in front of me, he looked so perfect, so god-like, I wanted to be naked in front of him too.
Before I could figure out how to work the gown down my body or up over my head, Coplan moved to the foot of the bed. The look in his eyes was wild and feral as he crawled toward me. The growl in his throat was as sinister as it was sultry.
“No,” he snarled. “Let me.”
He pounced on me in an instant, pinning me down beneath his weight. His hand pressed to my throat—something I had never imagined I would have liked. Not before I’d been taken by the Rutharians, and certainly not after. But this…I definitely liked this. It was aggressive, untamed and downright sinful, sure—but it was passionate, not cruel. His thumb ran down my throat, tracing the line of my windpipe, while his other hand moved to my breast. I whimpered in delight as he gave it a firm squeeze. My breast wasn’t even big enough to fill his palm, but as he caressed it through my nightgown, that didn’t seem to matter. Not to me, and certainly not to him.
He released me to move a single claw, the one on his index finger, to the neck of my nightgown. With it, he brushed the pendant he’d given me aside, then dug the claw’s point into the fabric of the gown. It hissed as his claw split the threadwork down to my ribs. The fabric parted, baring my breasts to him completely. He took his other hand away from my throat and claimed each side of the part in his fists, tearing the rest of the gown apart in one quick, sharp motion. It fell away from my body and settled beneath me.
Now, over my bare body, there was only him.
Coplan moved his mouth to mine, stopping just short of stealing a peck on my lips.
“Kiss me, Savii,” he ordered me. In the blues of his eyes, it was like he was daring me to disobey.
I shifted my body beneath him as I pressed my lips to his. As soon as I made contact, he took control. His mouth was hot, and his forked tongue was hotter. As it flicked against mine, I tasted him ravenously, like it was the first time. He was salty, sweet and delicious. He cupped my small face in his massive hands, cradling me gently one moment, holding me still so he could kiss me harder the next. My thighs parted for him on instinct. I wrapped my calves around his waist to draw him closer. When he eased himself against my hips, his cock stroked up my dripping wet slit in a way that made my whole body ache.
“Please,” I whimpered against his mouth. “Please, Coplan. Take me.”
“No,” he said roughly. “Not yet.”
He kissed his way down my body, leaving burning memories of his lips on every bit of my skin he claimed for his own. His hands moved to my waist, holding me down. I guessed he probably had to. He was stirring things in me that made me wiggle with need. My entire brain had blurred out the world around me. I was completely consumed by the desire I felt
pumping desperately in my chest and writhing eagerly in my core.
Feeling like that made it hard to stay still.
Coplan handled that with ease, though. He shifted his hands from my waist to my hips, forcing my thighs apart and leaving me completely open to him. Completely bared.
I closed my eyes, preparing for the worst. I knew what this felt like. I knew what was about to come next. The cold sensation of a tongue lapping between my legs, sending horrible shivers up and down my body as I tried and failed to get away.
Would I panic when Coplan touched me there? I was definitely afraid of it. My whole body tensed up as he lowered his lips to my pussy, and I clenched my eyes shut even tighter…
But then, I felt it. Not terror. Not cold.
Warmth.
Coplan’s breath was steamy as he hovered over the lips of my pussy. When he moved his mouth to kiss me, it felt like slipping into a hot bath after a long day. I wasn’t afraid of him. I couldn’t be. Instead of nausea, I felt pleasure bubbling in my core like molten gold pooling between my hips. When I shivered, it wasn’t because I was scared.
No—it was because Coplan’s forked tongue had slipped against my clit, licking so delicately that it almost felt like a tickle.
I took his hair in my hands immediately, pressing his mouth harder against my cunt.
I didn’t want a tickle from Coplan’s tongue. I wanted more. So much more.
Coplan gave it to me. I whimpered as his tongue rubbed my clit in firm, wet circles. He pinned it between the fork in his tongue, and I felt something pulsing against me. His heartbeat, fast and strong.
I’d never owned a vibrator before, but I could imagine how one might have felt. His pulse thrummed against my clit, making my pussy tighten and release with every beat. My eyes weren’t clenched shut with worry anymore. It was just, this felt so good, now I was afraid if I opened them it would all go away.
“Mm. So wet. So lovely.” Coplan moved his fingers to my entrance, teasing me. They slipped against me so perfectly, I wanted to beg him to push them inside.
But before I could, Coplan shifted again and pressed something even more perfect to my cunt. His cock was hard and thick and too hot to possibly be real. When he slipped the tip inside me, my eyes popped open on instinct.
And there he was. Gorgeous, with his blue waves still captured beneath my fingers and his irises colored to match. I could still see the slight pink scar across his cheek, faded now, from where I had clawed at him when I first woke up in his exam room. That moment felt like a lifetime ago. In this moment, he was real. Beautifully real. Perfectly real. And as I stared up at him, his gaze was fixed on me, too. Unblinking. Unyielding. Like he was making sure I was real as well.
When he finally closed his eyes, it was to force another inch of his shaft inside me. His cock throbbed within me, pulsating with desire, and my pussy throbbed around him right back, drawing him in further, sinking him deeper still. I whimpered as his thickness stretched me out and his length delved depths that I had never before felt. He whisked the noise away with kiss after kiss, until the tangling of our tongues matched the pace of his hips.
My whole world was spinning around me, but still, I didn’t feel fear. This spinning was delicious, exciting, like nothing else I’d ever experienced before. I may not have been a virgin when I met Coplan—through no fault of my own—but feeling him move within me, so perfectly intertwined like this, I felt like one.
This was what sex was meant to feel like, I realized. The careful give and take. The way he ran his fingers through my hair, cupped my breasts, teased my nipples so gently, then so hard, that I nearly came from that sensation alone.
“Yes,” he growled against my lips as I let out a particularly lusty moan. “More of that, Savii. More.”
He’d get more. Something was building inside me, like a bright pink balloon expanding until it was ready to pop. He could have taken it from me so quickly, it made me giddy—but instead, he took his time, testing each of his thrusts to measure the noises I made in response, repeating them when I made a sound he particularly liked.
“Coplan…” I moaned his name, giving into the pleasure. It was rich and luscious and dark, blindingly bright and explosive all at once.
“Savii…” He purred back at me. His breath was ragged now. His lips, when he kissed me, were ferocious, ravenous, all-consuming. “Savii, yes.”
Then, all at once, something broke and I was releasing high, breathy cries against his mouth, his shoulder, pounding my fist against his chest and gasping for air. In my core, hot waves of pleasure soared to tsunami-like heights, and within me, I could feel his cock pressed as deep as it could go, shooting searing strands of his seed inside me to amplify those waves.
It felt like dying.
It felt like rapture.
It felt like being born again, and again, and again.
I woke up the next morning in his arms. Coplan was already awake with blue-purple eyes staring down at me.
“How long was I asleep for?” I mumbled as I cuddled a little deeper into his embrace.
“All night, Savii.” Coplan smirked. “You were muttering my name in your dreams.”
“I was probably dreaming about you, idiot.” I returned his smile with a soft grin of my own. “Unless…is this a dream too?”
“Let us find out.” Coplan shifted his arms around me to reach down and give my ass a squeeze. I yelped when that squeeze turned into a pinch, though.
“Ouch!” I put my hand on his jawline, playfully pushing his face away. “Okay, okay. Not dreaming. That’s…nice.”
“Did you enjoy yourself?”
I took his chin in my hand and turned his face back toward me. “You know I did. You felt it. You don’t have to ask.”
“Mm. Perhaps not. But it seemed prudent to make sure.”
“Did you enjoy yourself?”
Coplan chuckled. “Greatly, yes. You do not have to ask.”
“Not bad for casual sex, huh?” I closed my eyes and nuzzled his neck.
“Not bad,” Coplan agreed. He stroked my hair fondly. “But whatever that was, Savii…it was not casual sex.”
Before I could ask what that meant, he kissed my forehead and gently moved his body away from mine to crawl out of bed.
“Where are you going?” I scooted over to lay my head on his pillow. It was still warm from his body heat. “I want to stay like this all day.”
“And you can, vringna.” Coplan took the covers and pulled them up over me, tucking me in. “But unfortunately, I have rounds to make.”
“Will you come back here after?” I asked. I fluttered my eyelashes at him and did my best to look sultry, even though I was sure I probably looked like I’d been ridden hard and put away wet. After all, I kind of had been. “I wouldn’t mind doing that again.”
Coplan paused as he stooped to recover his shirt. He was still naked enough that I could see his muscles tense up at my question. When he sighed, my heart almost stopped.
Oh, no.
“Savii…”
“Coplan, please. Don’t just let this be a one-time thing. If I have to lose you—if my memory is going to be erased anyway—why can’t we keep doing this until that time comes? I know we don’t have long together, but why can’t we make the most of what little time we have?”
“Because, Savii…” Coplan dressed quickly and took his boots up in his hand as he came to my side again. He pressed another kiss to my forehead, then, after a moment of hesitation, gave me a kiss on the lips. It didn’t last nearly long enough. “Should we do that again, perfect as it was…to let myself grow accustomed to you, only to lose you, would kill me. You may be forced to forget me…but I will never forget you.”
I opened my mouth to argue with him, but no words came out.
He was right. All this time, I’d only been thinking of myself. Not once had I thought of him—how he didn’t have the choice to erase me from his memory. How he might miss me when I was gone.
By the time I realized I needed to apologize, he was already out the door.
“Coplan! Wait!” I rushed to clutch the sheets around me so I could follow him, but the sound of the door to the suite closing told me I didn’t need to bother.
He was already gone.
I dressed in a fresh nightgown feeling worse than I’d ever felt. Coplan had been so worried about taking advantage of me…but in reality, if anything, I’d taken advantage of him. Thanks to the Rutharians, I didn’t have my virginity to give him. But I’d still taken his anyway.
When I left—and we both knew that I had to—he’d be married off to some other woman, and I’d go home to marry some other man without so much as a memory of the night we’d just shared.
It hurt.
It hurt more than I’d ever imagined anything could.
I slumped toward the bathroom in a daze. Maybe washing my face would help the way my head had just gone from feeling floaty and light to completely bogged down by grief. But before I got to the sink, I heard the strangest thing.
My door opened. The one to the suite.
That…shouldn’t have been possible. My keycard was the only thing that should have been able to open that door from the outside, and I could see it on the bedside table, right where I left it. I supposed the generals of the ship might have had cards of their own in case of emergencies, but what in the world would they have been doing slipping in unannounced?
My heart leapt up as a thought crossed my mind. Coplan…maybe he had one from the medical bay? It would make sense. As a former patient, he could have kept one just in case he thought I needed to be checked up on, even though I’d been discharged.
A smile spread across my lips as I rushed out into the main room.
He’d come back for me. I could apologize to him. I’d get to see him again.
But as soon as I got out into the living room, my face fell immediately. The smile disappeared as soon as I realized how wrong I’d been.
