by Nina Lincoln
After a dispute over his attitude toward relationships and love in general, he told me in a rare moment of vulnerability that I was the light to his darkness, insisting he needed that light.
And I stupidly accepted his casual insistence that he liked me when he all but shoved the fact that he didn’t plan to get attached down my throat. More fool I. It was all bullshit, as it turns out, but it made me soft and pliable at the time.
With a grimace, I settle into the lesson and concentrate on the teacher's words, all in an effort to block out the past that continues to haunt me.
After, I sail through three more classes, all of which, maddeningly Colt managed to get in, although luckily these all have assigned seating, and to his frustration, the teachers won't budge.
At lunch, I’m expecting it, some sick part of me craving it, so I show no surprise when he corners me, backing me into a wall while students sail past on the tide heading for the cafeteria.
Leaning my head against the wall, I wait for him to speak, my pulse picking up when he presses his arm against the wall by my head, and I’m reminded of the last time I was in this situation.
Ben Johnson, one of Colt's former friends - I thought - who knows now, cornered me after Colt beat the shit out of him. It came after Colt’s game to see me make a fool of myself, setting me up to take a fall by convincing me if I got the goods from a boy at Academy, he’d make the reign of terror at his hands go away.
Of course, as it turns out, he didn’t need the information. It was all a bid to make me look like the rich bitch whore willing to fuck my way into the information he sought. Except, I wasn't a willing participant and barely made it out after Buck tried to force me, and Ben stood outside the door and watched, holding the door closed against my efforts to escape.
It turns out, Colt didn’t appreciate Ben’s lack of intervention and made sure he understood the error of his ways. After which, Ben was sent to South, where I ended up a few weeks later, and of course, he tried to take his rage out on me. I only escaped when Hayden came along, but it was a near miss.
Interestingly, I’m not sure that even Buck wasn't in on Colt’s shenanigans because, as it turns out, he’s Colt’s half-brother.
So much of the mystery left to unravel, should I care to find out. I’ve still got a bone to pick with Buck and perhaps those who participated in the venture to scare me by way of my stalker. After all, we’ve established they have no rules when it comes to me.
Why should I play nice?
Colt pulls me back to the present when he grabs my chin and forces me to gaze into his angry eyes. “You made a mistake, Princess, a big mistake.”
He’s stroking my jaw, and it's distracting because his hand is warm, his fingers rough, but I try to focus on the topic at hand, my revenge, and his big reveal. “Perhaps it's you who made a mistake, Colt. Maybe you shouldn't have messed with me, to begin with.”
He smiles cruelly, running his finger over my bottom lip, “No, Baby, you don't understand, you started something you can't finish.”
“No, Colt,” I say, batting his hand away with a shiver, fuck me, but my body’s on fire at the prospect of what he might do with that damn finger. Jerk.
“You made a mistake. You started this. The depths to which you are willing to sink are fucking disgusting. Did you think I wouldn’t figure it out? You’re lucky I didn’t call the fucking cops. That was only because I like your mom.”
“Cops? What the fuck are you talking about?” he growls, his brows arching over his eyes.
“The dolls, dick. The notes. The fucking note sitting on my pillow while I slept! You fucking tortured me into believing someone was breaking into my home and threatening me. I mean, is there no level to which you won't sink?”
His face falls at the mention of the dolls, and my chest tightens with anger and hurt all over again. Somehow, amongst all the shit he threw my way, including making me think he liked me just to move on to Sarah, the stalker shit hurts most of all. I literally feared for my life and refused to sleep in my bed for weeks after, and he played right along with me, pretending concern, even going so far as to bring a doll supposedly left at his house, posing as a threat to him because of me.
I mean diabolical shit. Right?
“News flash, Finn, yes, I put a couple of dolls on your desk because it was funny, but I didn’t leave any fucking notes, and I didn’t kill a fucking bird and leave it in a box. That shit isn’t funny,” he says, incredulously.
“Right!” I scoff, “As if I’m gonna believe a single word that comes out of your mouth. You’re a fucking psychopath with an ax to grind. Fine, I get it, you hate me. For reasons I suspect I'll never understand. But you drew the fucking line with the notes, Colt and I responded in kind. Leave me the fuck alone, and maybe we can move on.”
Caressing my chin, he smirks, and it’s the curl of his lip I love to hate or hate to love, I guess. Shit, but Colt’s burrowed so far under my skin I still yearn for his touch, and he fucking broke my heart.
“Oh no, Finn. This isn’t over until I get my pound of fucking flesh. You think you can air my family’s secrets to the entirety of both fucking schools, and I’ll lay down and take it? Nope, not gonna happen.”
“Whatever,” I say, rolling my eyes. “What do you think you can do to me that you haven't already done? What more could you possibly do? Sink the knife in my chest, Colt, that’s the only thing left. I don't care anymore. You want to fuck Sarah, fuck her. You want to fuck the entirety of the school, do it. You want to get the whole damn school to hate me and pick on me? Do it. You want to pull me into some stupid game with Buck, give it a shot. You’ve got nothing left to play. There’s nothing left here,” I say, pounding my chest harshly.
Gazing at my hand intently, he smiles grimly and leans forward, cupping my cheek and whispering, “Maybe, maybe not. But you’re fooling yourself if you think I can’t have you anytime I want. And I think, Princess, that maybe you’re lying to yourself when you insist there’s nothing left here.”
Sliding his hand from my cheek, he runs it down the side of my neck and places it over my heart, where my pulse is pounding at the contact. Need courses through me in waves, leaving me weak-kneed and shaky, but I’ll be damned if I let him in on that fact.
“Nonsense, as you said, love is for the weak. If I’ve learned anything from you, it's that,” I say through dry lips.
He chuckles, but the sound is dark, his eyes icy. “If that’s the case, then you won't mind a little game.”
My heart lurches, ice traveling down my spine. After all this, he still can’t fucking let it go. Annoyed by my fucking hormones and his asshole grin, I clench my teeth and smile grimly.
“Bring it. Because Colt...I still hate you,” I whisper, ducking under his arm and walking away.
Slipping out of sight and into a restroom, I lock myself in the stall and breathe deeply. Get your shit together Finn, you don't care about him, you don't want him, and you definitely don't feel tingles every time he steps into your presence.
He’s your enemy, and nothing can change that. Nothing.
Colt somehow managed to enroll in every single one of my classes, and by the end of the day, I’m both admiring of his power and annoyed. I’ve had no chance to relax. He’s been giving me glares every chance he gets, a promise of what's to come, but I meant what I said. What could he possibly do after everything he’s already pulled?
I don’t trust a single one of his friends. I don't trust him. I’ll never be able to believe a single thing that comes out of his mouth, even if he insists he’s genuine. I mean, his insistence about the notes is a point, in fact. How can I even know if he’s lying, planning some new angle of revenge I won't fucking see coming? I can't.
I haven’t gotten a single note or grotesque offering since I came to South, and now that I’ve confronted him, he’s done with that avenue, or so I hope. Because despite how much I like his mom, I will report it next time.
After school, Nate surfaces,
and I wince as he walks with me to my car. “Hey, pretty girl, how’s it going?”
Shit, with everything else that went down, I forgot about our make-out session at prom. Truthfully, I was in a zone that night, and while Nate’s attention wasn’t unwelcome, the majority of my efforts were in direct relation to how it would impact Colt.
Essentially, I strung Nate along, and no matter my enmity toward Colt, I don’t feel any spark with Nate, and now I have to look into his gleaming eyes and let him down easy.
“Good,” I murmur, “how about you?”
“Okay, I’m fucking dreading the senior trip, though. Who decides taking a bunch of underage dicks camping is a good idea?”
“Uh, what? Senior trip?” I stutter, a new horror suffusing my system. What fresh hell is this? I’ve no good memories from the few times Dad took me camping with him. None.
“Yeah, didn’t you read about it? Every year the seniors get a trip, except the budget’s too low this year, and we're stuck camping in the wilderness. Fucking blows.”
“I - wow, that sounds really horrible. Can't you just say no?”
Please, God, let me say no.
“Nope, part of our senior experience, we’re even graded on it,” he says glumly.
“Graded how?”
“Science or some shit. You know, nature.”
With a new horror to contend with, I part ways with him and open my car, throwing my bag inside.
“Finn, I’m disappointed. I thought you’d be the first to greet me this morning as my girlfriend and all,” Hayden purrs behind me.
Turning, I give him a blank stare. Hayden’s tall, built, and a little fucking dark. When I met him the first time, I knew then to stay the fuck away. If Colt’s a lion stalking the jungle, Hayden’s a fucking velociraptor.
“Hayden, you were fucking some chick at prom. Even if I believed you about the little charade you concocted, it’s hardly believable when you can’t keep your dick in your pants.”
“Charade? I’ll have you know it was working just fine until you stopped playing the part,” he says, affronted. “And what do you mean if you believed me?”
“C’mon, it's clear you’re buddies with Colt. Why would I believe you didn’t make this shit up to get at me the same way everyone else has?”
“Because, yes, Colt’s my friend or was. But he’s still a dick who deserves a good lesson every once in a while. Believe what you will, but it ate him up thinking you were with me,” he states, giving me a smirk and walking away.
Rolling my eyes, I jump in my car and head home, disarming the alarm and arming it behind me once I’m inside. Colt may have been acting like a dick when he played his little stalking charade, but the alarm system is something I don’t regret. I feel leagues safer with the damn thing around.
Collapsing on the couch, I contemplate my day and Colt’s interference at every turn. I knew the consequences of what I did would probably be extreme, and I’m not looking forward to it, but I’m not unprepared either.
What I said was true. What could Colt possibly do after the shit he’s already pulled?
From day one, he was gunning for me. He got the whole school to hate me, judging me without cause. Then he set me up to meet some dick from Academy, who coincidentally turned out to be his half-brother, to make me look like the Princess he continues to call me - this after suckering me into thinking he would get everyone to back off if I just got the dirt from the same dude.
Apparently, that wasn’t enough, though, because he made me fall for him and betrayed me in front of the whole school.
All of which pales in comparison to his ultimate scheme, scaring the living shit out of me by orchestrating the stalker shit too.
I’ve been hated, tormented, called names, forced to see I’m not good enough, scared out of my wits, and humiliated in front of my peers. I mean, there’s nothing left.
Still, my mind whirls with the possibilities because if I were to underestimate Colt, it would be to my detriment.
*****
The following day, after facing off with Colt in every class and ignoring his efforts to piss me off by flirting with some chick who usually hangs off Hayden, I confirm Nate’s statement about the senior trip. And then spend a good fifteen minutes arguing with my last period teacher to no avail.
I can’t envision going on a fucking trip into the woods with these fuckers who’ve shown the depths of the depravity to which they will sink. And my own less than stellar memories with my dad have been circling my mind since Nate brought it up yesterday.
To my annoyance, Colt is waiting for me with a smirk on his face when I exit the classroom with a huff.
Sailing past him, I growl when he steps in beside me and says, “What's the matter, Princess, don't you like to camp? Maybe you don't like to get your hands dirty?”
I’m frustrated enough that I bark out a response without thinking it through, which I regret immediately. I’m done over-sharing with Colt about anything that involves me. He doesn’t deserve to know the things that formed me, my heartaches and traumas, my happiness, and good times. Not a single piece of it. Not even my terror at his hands.
“Yeah, camping trips were real fun with Dad. The last time I went willingly, he took me out to the middle of nowhere and left me behind when he got angry because I was tired and hungry. I was twelve, dick. It took me five hours wandering through the dark before I found the campsite.”
His face is frozen, but I don't bother to stay and hear whatever he has to say. Speaking my truth has brought something out of me that's pinching my skin, and I feel it pressing at my throat, needing to get free.
Leaving the school, I head straight to my mom’s grave, laying out across her plaque and gazing at the sky. Sometimes, dredging up the past is like reopening a wound that’s barely scabbed over - other times, it rolls off my back easily. I never know what’s coming and today is apparently a bad day.
“So now, I have to go on a camping trip. Blah. I’m dreading it. You know I hate it. You know…”
“Colt’s at South now, and he’s out to get me, but honestly, Mom, I don’t feel like I have anything left to lose.”
“Did you hate him? Dad? Or did you look into his eyes and feel pathetically hopeful only for it to be crushed when he broke his promise once again?”
*****
Colt’s on me all week, giving me heated smirks from across the room, taunting me in classes where he's wrangled a seat next to mine. The sick part of me enjoys the attention, but in the wake of his betrayal, I can never feel the unfettered joy I felt around him again.
Now I’m like a crack whore, tempted by something I know is terrible for me but will give me the high I’ve been craving.
By lunch Friday, I’m annoyed and tired. Everywhere I go, he’s there, and I’m not sure of his game, but he’s definitely keeping me on my toes.
Since I’m suspicious of just about everyone’s motives, I accept Nate’s invitation to eat at his table. He’s the only one who doesn’t appear to have an affiliation with Colt, and although he’s all smiles, which makes me a bit uncomfortable, he hasn’t made any more moves, allowing me to relax and enjoy my lunch as much as I can anyway.
Unfortunately, I have a feeling I’m going to have to let him down eventually, which means I could be about to lose a friend - depressing that.
Colt sits across the way at Hayden’s table, which makes me even warier of the duo. Clearly, they know each other better than they let on, and the picture I found of them from a few years ago only confirms that suspicion.
Not only that, but Hayden’s harem surrounds them, happy to turn their greedy attention to Colt. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t leave me cold to watch him flirt, but I’m also not going to give him the satisfaction of knowing it.
Besides, I can flirt too.
Giving Nate a pretty smile, I glance at Colt from the corner of my eye and find him staring at me, to which I raise my head to glare back, giving him my iciest eyes.
&nbs
p; He only grins brutally, which gives me goosebumps that I refuse to admit are anything more than an internal warning system of things to come, even if my body turns to liquid fire at his savagery at the same time.
I haven’t had a chance to speak to Melissa about prom since she’s at North, but I have heard from Teddy that there are rumblings amongst Colt’s loyal fan club, all via classroom gossip since Teddy wasn’t at prom himself. Is Colt here for revenge? Or to outrun his lies?
Per Teddy, the students of Northside were appalled to hear of Colt’s relation to Buck and shocked, of course, about the two wives scandal making jokes about sister wives and such.
Apparently, though, they don’t care that Daddy is a rich dick, skipping over that information and focusing on Buck Stark, who’s mortal enemy number one since he crashed a party freshman year and trashed some guy’s house animal style.
When kicked to the curb, his only excuse was, he thought that’s how the poor assholes lived. Beyond that, Buck has made it his goal to be a jerk whenever possible, causing general mayhem wherever he goes. Nobody can stand the prick.
This is no surprise to me. Buck - for all his riches, is clearly a jerk with a god complex. You’ll never hear me say it to Colt, but if Buck’s anything to go by, Colt was better off without a full-time daddy dearest.
“You going to the party this weekend?” Nate asks with a flirty smile, flashing the dimple that surely makes the girls swoon.
Unfortunately, it’s lost on me because all my attention is centered on the guy who stands abruptly from his table and exits the cafeteria loudly.
Smiling at Nate, I murmur, “What party?”
*****
My curiosity about whether Colt transferred to get out of the mess I created is quickly put to rest when I halfheartedly agree to attend the party Nate mentioned the week before. Although he definitely gets the cold shoulder from many, he’s still got the adoration of the few, which rankles. Dick. I guess it makes sense why he values loyalty over everything.
Surprisingly, I’m welcomed with open arms by the same jerks who called me rich bitch and tortured me for months. It’s...weird.
