by Kelly Oram
“How can I?” I asked. “Maybe you’re acting under orders right now—use Grace’s feelings against her. Make her believe you always cared.”
“No!”
“Grace,” Ethan said heavily. “Come on, let’s go.”
“Don’t ever talk to me again,” I said into the phone. “Tell your brothers that if they even so much as look at me again I will go straight to the council and tell them everything I know about the resistance.”
“Grace, please don’t do this. You’re my best friend.”
“Not anymore.” My voice was dead as I whispered, “Good-bye, Cynthia.”
I hung up the phone and Ethan started to open his mouth, but I stopped him with just a look. I shrugged out from under his arm and got to my feet.
There had only been one person in my entire life that really loved me unconditionally. I needed her desperately, but my mother was gone, so I had to settle for the only parent I had left. Actually, the only person I had left in the whole world.
I found my father laughing with a group of guys I didn’t recognize. When they saw me, my dad’s face lit up and he waved me over for introductions. “I’m sorry,” I told them, “It’s very nice to meet you, but may I please steal my father away for just a second?”
The men took in my puffy eyes and looked alarmed. When my annoyed-looking father noticed my face, he was startled. “Excuse me, gentlemen. A father’s duty…”
The guys all laughed and as soon as they were gone my dad said, “This had better be important, Grace. Do you know who you just interrupted?”
I’d planned on holding myself together, but once he was standing there I threw myself into his arms and started sobbing all over again. “Daddy,” I cried. “Will you please take me home?”
My dad’s whole demeanor softened, and his tight grip became a sincere, fatherly hug. “What’s wrong, Gracie?”
“I’ve just had a really bad day, and I really don’t feel well, and I had a big fight with Cynthia, and I just want to go home.”
“Of course, Grace. You can go if you need to. That’s why Ethan’s here. I’m sure he won’t mind staying with you until I get there. Why don’t you find Andrew and invite him to go with you, too? You seemed to be enjoying yourself earlier when he was with you.”
The mention of Andrew set me off in another hysterical round of sobs. “I don’t want Ethan or Andrew! Can’t you come home with me? Just for one night?”
“I’m sorry, Grace. You know I have obligations.”
“I should be your obligation! Please, Daddy?” I begged pathetically. “Can’t we just go home and watch a movie? We could make popcorn and eat Junior Mints just like we used to before…”
Before Mom died. I couldn’t say it out loud, but it didn’t matter. Dad understood what I meant. “Oh, Gracie,” he said, squeezing me in another fierce hug. “Is that what the matter is? I miss her so much tonight, too. But try not to be upset, okay? Go home and get some rest and you’ll feel better. I would take you home, but I just can’t skip out tonight.”
I saw the look in his eyes change. It was a look I’d seen so many times before. His mind was made up. I’d just lost this argument. I still gave it one last try anyway. “It’s just a party, Dad,” I whispered. “I really need you tonight.”
To his credit, he looked as if he wanted to say yes.
“I’m sorry, Grace,” he said. He’d taken on his stern father voice again. “I understand, but things are different now. You’re not the only one who needs me anymore. You’re going to have to get used to sharing.”
As if I’d ever had him all to myself. Ever! Here I was, falling apart in front of him, admitting I needed him, begging him to take care of me, to love me and do the right thing for once in his life, and he was turning me down for a party.
Andrew was right. I had no one.
My heart splintered into a million pieces. There was officially nothing left of it. I stopped crying. I stopped feeling. I just went numb. I was completely dead inside.
“Tell you what,” Dad said when he saw the fight leave me. “I’ll have your schedule cleared tomorrow. You can’t be doing interviews like this anyway, so take the day off and have Ethan take you on a picnic or something. Some fresh air and some peace and quiet will do you good.”
“Sure,” I said, and then left without another word.
I think Ethan tried to convince me to get in his car, but to be honest, I wasn’t really thinking straight that night. He could have been doing a song and dance about cupcakes and I wouldn’t have known the difference.
I walked, crutches and all, down street after street. It didn’t matter where I was going, as long as it was anywhere but home. I had no reason to go there. What was waiting for me there? A TV? Some books? There was not one single person in my life who really cared about me. Sure, Andrew said he did, but psycho-obsession doesn’t count. In no way does blackmailing someone into a relationship count as love.
As I walked, I kept thinking about Andrew. It was only going to get worse. I did exactly what he’d wanted tonight, exactly what he’d expected me to do. He knew exactly how much power he had over me now, and there was no way he’d ever let me escape him. For the rest of my life, I would have to do whatever Andrew said if I wanted to keep my father safe, and I wasn’t even sure anymore if my dad deserved it.
The more I thought about what Andrew might expect me to do, the more hopeless my situation looked. The only way I would ever get out of this was if I no longer existed. If I weren’t here, Andrew wouldn’t have a reason to release those photos. He had nothing personal against my dad; this power play had only to do with me. He’d just found the one thing that would be sure to make me give in to him.
And really, if I didn’t exist anymore, who would care? Cynthia might blame herself, but she’d get over it. My dad might be sad for a while, but his life would get a lot less complicated, and he’d get over it faster than Cynthia. Plus, then he’d have new leverage in his re-election campaign. Ethan would probably jump for joy.
So this was what my life had become. Would I live the rest of my life a slave to a psychotic vampire, destroy my father, or cease to exist? Really, I only had one option.
Without giving it a second thought, I stepped out into the oncoming traffic just as a city bus came barreling up the street. I pinched my eyes shut as the driver lay on the horn, and then suddenly I was flying through the air. The impact didn’t hurt like I’d expected it to, and I didn’t seem to be landing.
“Damn it, Grace! What is the matter with you?”
A desperate, crazy rage tore through me when I realized I was flying through the night sky in the arms of one seriously pissed off nephilim warrior. I should have known Ethan wouldn’t let me get away with it.
“Let me go!” I screamed, trying to kick and push my way out of his hold. “You had no right to stop me!”
“I’m not going to let you hurt yourself, so just get that idea out of you head right now!”
“I hate you! You wouldn’t even care! No one would care!” My screams turned into sobs, and my hands quit punching and clung to him instead. “You’d be free,” I cried. “Cynthia would be free, my dad would be free. I’d be free! Please, just let me go!”
He didn’t. Not until he dropped me onto my own bed. Then he stomped across the room, slammed my door shut, and sank down in front of it.
“You think you’re saving me, but you’re not!” I yelled at him. “You’re making things worse! You’re the worst guardian angel that ever existed!”
Ethan had listened to me yell and scream at him all the way home and finally it got to be too much. “You know why you’re pathetic, Grace?” he asked. “Because you give up. Being human isn’t what makes you weak. You don’t stand up for yourself. You don’t fight back. You let people use you and push you around and then you wallow in self-pity. It’s disgusting.”
Ethan shook his head and continued to rant to himself. “I can’t believe I was bonded to someone suicidal! How co
uld you ever be important to the supernatural race? What makes you so special? What about you is even worth protecting?”
“Nothing!” I screamed. “Nothing at all, so just stop doing it!”
Ethan rose to his feet, sighing as if I were a hopeless case. “I’m going to tell your father what you tried to do. You’re not leaving this room unless it’s to go to a hospital.”
“That’s right, because pathetic little human Grace is cracking up,” I said as sarcastically as I could.
Ethan shook his head. “This has nothing to do with the supernatural. You’re sick, Grace. You need help.”
I laughed bitterly. Like there was any psychiatrist in the world that could solve my problems? “No one can help me.”
“Not with an attitude like that,” Ethan said, leaving me alone in my room and shutting the door quietly behind him. I was glad to see him go.
Not five minutes later, Andrew was outside my bedroom window. “Let me in, love,” he demanded after I’d ignored his knock.
I rolled over and pulled the bedcovers over my head.
“Your father’s a good man, Grace. I don’t want to hurt him, but I will if I must.”
Trapped once again, I did as he asked. I unlocked my window and then crawled back into bed. I heard the glass slide open and seconds later Andrew had me in his arms. I didn’t have it in me to fight him. At this point, I didn’t even have it in my to cry anymore.
“You will never do something like that again!” Andrew scolded. He shook me slightly but cradled me against him at the same time, unable to make his voice sound angry. “Promise me you will never try to hurt yourself again.”
Andrew stared into my eyes, waiting for a promise that would never come.
“I love you so much,” he whispered, shaking me again. “If anything had happened to you…”
He kissed me, but I was dead weight against his lips. My non-response made him angry. He kissed me harder, but it did him no good. My heart may have been beating, but I was dead.
“Grace!” Andrew growled. “Killing yourself will not save your father. If you attempt to escape me in any way, I will destroy him.”
Apparently there was some feeling left in me. Andrew’s threat broke through the deadness and made me cry again. My tears brought him relief. His kisses became gentle again and his was voice soft as he said, “I’m sorry to be so harsh, but I need you, love. You need me, too. You will understand that once I get you away from this place. I’m going to take you far away. Once you are no longer around people who keep hurting you, your heart will heal and you will be able to accept me.”
Andrew scooped me into his arms and carried me to the window. I let out a tiny yelp when he jumped from my second-story window, but my fear was unwarranted. He landed on his feet with cat-like grace. I never even felt the movement.
As he carried me across the lawn, I looked back at my house and said a silent good-bye to everyone I knew. I knew I could have fought. I could have called for Ethan. But maybe Andrew was right, and things really were better this way.
Andrew jumped the front gate with as much ease as he’d leapt from my window, and when we landed on the other side he chuckled at my astonishment. “I wish you could have joined me as a vampire,” he said with a wistful sigh. “There are so many wonderful things I could have shown you. But I guess you’ll just have to help me rediscover my humanity.”
He set me on my feet so that he could put his hands on my face. He shut his eyes and breathed in deeply. “Your touch is intoxicating,” he whispered.
He couldn’t help himself then and pulled me to him for a long, hard kiss. I could feel his desire turn to desperation when I didn’t respond. “Kiss me,” he pleaded against my lips.
I couldn’t do it, and his desperation quickly turned to anger. “You must try, Grace,” he demanded. “As long as you try, I can be patient with you. I will give you all the time you need to warm up to me. But if I fear you’ve given up, I will be forced to take more drastic measures.”
As if to give me a hint of these drastic measures he talked about, his hands moved from my face and traveled the length of my body before slipping beneath the hem of my blouse. I gasped when I felt his cool fingers press firmly into my skin. The sensation made my skin crawl. He clutched the curves of my waist and pulled my body against his. “Do you understand, love? You have to try.”
His mouth came down on mine again, and with a whimper I forced my lips to part. That was enough to mollify him and he melted against me, getting lost in the kiss even as I cried.
Suddenly, we were ripped apart by an invisible force that blew Andrew back a good ten feet and sent him crashing against my front gate. I lost my balance in the process, but found myself in a different pair of arms before I could hit the ground.
For minutes I just clung to my rescuer and cried. Eventually I looked back at Andrew’s still body lying against my front gate. “Is he dead?”
“Just sleeping,” Russ answered. “He’ll be out for about ten more minutes or so. Are you all right?”
I avoided his question. “How did you do that?”
“Magic may not have any effect on you, but it works on him just fine.” Russ set me back on my feet and turned me to face him. “What were you doing out here with him?”
“He was kidnapping me,” I muttered. “He said he was going to take me somewhere far away where everyone I know wouldn’t be able to hurt me anymore. He jumped us right out of my bedroom window.”
I saw Russ’s eyes fill with pity, and cast my gaze to the ground shamefully. Russ pulled my chin back up and forced me to look at him. “You’re safe now, Grace.”
Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew that wasn’t true, but coming from Russ I could believe it for the moment. “Thank you for stopping him,” I said, and then wrapped my arms around him in a grateful hug.
Unlike Ethan, Russ had no problem returning the affection. He squeezed me back, as if he were as relieved as I was that he got here just in time.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“Ethan called and said you were upset. He sounded worried about you.”
“So you came to check on me?” I asked incredulously.
Russ gave me a lopsided smile. “I couldn’t leave it to Ethan to cheer you up. You’d probably kill each other if he attempted it.”
I barked out a surprised laugh and nestled myself against him, stealing another hug. “Thank you,” I whispered again. A few more tears spilled from my eyes, because his small act of coming to visit simply because he wanted to cheer me up was more kindness than I’d received in a very long time.
“Anytime.” Russ pulled me back again and smiled playfully. “But do me a favor and knock off the waterworks, huh?” he teased. “Your face is way too pretty to be all puffy and covered with snot.”
I laughed for real this time, and nodded a promise.
Russ was laughing too when he reached up to dry my cheeks, but his playfulness slipped away when he touched me. Instead of wiping my face, his fingertips lingered at the side of my mouth, causing my breath to catch. He claimed magic didn’t work on me, but there was no other way to describe the sparks of pleasure that surged through me when he looked at me the way he was right then.
His head started to dip toward me, but just as my eyes fluttered shut he jumped back, startled, as he realized what he was about to do. It took me a moment to catch up to what had happened. I opened my eyes just in time to see him bury a pained look.
The rejection hurt more than it should have. I knew what his problem was, and I understood it, but it still lanced my already battered and broken heart. I managed to keep my tears at bay, but I wasn’t able to hide my disappointment.
“Sorry,” Russ whispered.
I shrugged and said, “It’s okay,” even though it really wasn’t.
Russ chose that moment to buzz the gate and hollered, “Ethan! Get out here!”
The gate opened and Ethan jogged down the driveway a few seconds late
r. “What’s up, Russ?” he asked, and then saw me and nearly tripped over his feet. “Grace? What are you doing out—” He noticed Andrew and swore. “What happened?”
“That’s what I’d like to know,” Russ said.
I was surprised at the animosity Russ showed his new BFF. They hadn’t so much as frowned at one another all week.
“If I hadn’t showed up exactly when I did, they’d be halfway to the airport by now. You’re supposed to be her warrior. How the hell is she getting kidnapped with you in the same damn house?”
Ethan’s eyes widened in surprise, but he quickly returned Russ’s frustration. “She was locked in her room! The alarm was on! She never made a peep!”
“She was standing here bawling her eyes out while the jerk forced himself on her! You’re supposed to feel when she’s in distress!”
“Distress?” Ethan yelled. “She’s past distress! She’s numb! Completely broken! She was an absolute wreck earlier, and then nothing. She’s been that way for hours. How the hell was I supposed to know when she didn’t call for help? She didn’t even make any noise.”
Ethan groaned and pulled angrily at his hair. “She tried to kill herself tonight!” he screamed. “She walked in front of a damn bus, for crying out loud! I can only do so much to protect her if she doesn’t want to be helped!”
Russ stared at me, stunned. “Is that why you weren’t fighting him? You were hoping he would kill you?”
I glared at Russ. “I’m not too naïve to know my death is the last thing Andrew wants.”
Russ had been mad at Ethan a minute ago, but now he turned that anger on me. “And I’m not too stupid to see when a girl’s not into it! Why weren’t you trying to stop him?”
Ethan gasped and then actually pushed Russ aside to take his turn shouting at me. “What did he do to you?”