Fun, yes—a little playful, harmless fun. But nothing more. And with Kara he had a feeling she wanted more. With what she’d been through she certainly deserved more.
‘And if you do leave? Then what?’
She held her hand up. ‘I just want to put a huge wedge of space between me and temptation. My life’s been stuffed up too many times already.’
Which wasn’t exactly a ringing endorsement of his kissing talent. He should have been relieved. He wasn’t.
‘I have to warn you that my first impulse is to say no. Things aren’t going well for Karen’s mum and she’s requested further time off. If you transfer out it will leave the clinic in difficulty.’
‘Oh. I see.’
‘Look, I need a good junior surgeon and I have one. Why would I give that up for the sake of temptation? I don’t intend to allow my work to be compromised.’
His private desires could go to hell. Was it really because he would be short-staffed? Or was it because he was being selfish? Gah, he hated that thought—that he would use his needs to make someone do something they didn’t want to.
If that was the case he was no better than his deadbeat father, who had fed his own pathetic needs before putting food in his kids’ mouths, forcing a boy to do the work of a man. Who had betrayed the love of his family, his wife. His son.
So, no, he didn’t want to be selfish—but he also didn’t want to be short-staffed to the point that something had to give. With the desperate needs of his patients and the reputation of the clinic in his hands he had too much at stake right now.
He bit down on the flare of heat as she glared at him. A challenge. But not, he suspected, with the kind of result she was expecting. Because instead of annoying him it fired him.
‘Okay, well, leave it with me. I have an urgent report to write in what’s left of this evening. I’ll see you in the morning. We can talk more then.’
Scraping his chair back, he stood and walked to her side of the desk. She stood too, picked up her bag and slung it across her body—a very chic leather barrier. Slamming down the venetian blinds, he turned to her, watched the steel in her pupils melt into hazy heated green.
She could have left. For that matter so could he. But the only direction his feet moved in was towards her.
He ran his fingers through a loose curl of her hair, reached out and pulled the messy ponytail down until her blonde hair pooled over her shoulders. Then he grasped a handful of it and breathed in the sweet scent of freedom and heat.
He looked into her face, at the smattering of freckles over her nose, her perfect full lips glistening with a pale, barely there lip-gloss, then into those eyes that searched his soul. His thumb ran a trail down her cheek, landed on her mouth, and she bit gently down on the soft pad and smiled. His groin tightened as spasms of heat shimmied through him.
She gasped, but she didn’t pull away. ‘Two kisses, Declan...’
And both times she’d asked him. Now it was his turn.
He leaned into her neck and whispered, ‘Kiss me.’
And he could tell by the way her body softened towards him that she did want that. More than anything. That this buzz between them tugged hard, and that she was struggling to fight it. But he didn’t wait—couldn’t wait—to do what he’d been aching to do since he’d forced himself to walk away last night. He lowered his mouth onto hers, felt the hesitation, the sharp intake of breath, then felt the heat and the need spiral through her.
She wound her hands around his neck as the kiss deepened. And he should have stopped. He should have allowed her to go, to walk away from his team and to stop this kissing thing... But he couldn’t. Something about Kara Stephens made him want to hold on and never let go.
* * *
A sharp knock at the door had them jumping apart. Kara stepped away from Declan on jelly legs and hung on to the back of a chair, her grip as white as the expensive upholstery. She didn’t want to look at him, but she stole a glance to see how he was reacting.
Instead of being in any way embarrassed or flustered, like her, he looked triumphant as he held up three fingers. ‘Three. Kisses.’
Kiss number three had so not been in her plan.
What was it about him that made her want to kiss him so thoroughly? And so many times?
His story and his humility had touched something deep inside her and that reaction had frightened her. The only logical thing she could do, she’d thought, was to move away...not kiss him again. Every contact she had with him dragged her deeper and deeper under his spell. This wasn’t just about a purely physical attraction, and that realisation scared her more than anything.
Her cheeks and body ablaze, she inhaled and searched for inner serenity as Ethan Hunter walked into the room. When all she could find was inner chaos she gave up and threw the head of the Hunter Clinic’s charitable arm a wobbly smile, hoping that, if nothing else, she could at least project a semblance of calm. ‘Hi, Ethan.’
‘Kara, hello. How are you?’
She’d heard rumours about Ethan’s temper and mood swings, but so far her dealings with him had been only professional. However, well used to being around army veterans, she could spot the invisible wounds, the need to be treated equally, especially after being damaged both emotionally and physically—as Ethan had been—and the refusal to accept any weakness.
Although he clearly believed he hid them well, Ethan wore the scars in his limp and in his stubborn refusal to use a walking stick, and in his absolute unwavering dedication to his reconstructive work on wounded soldiers and war victims alike.
It had been Ethan’s suggestion that she join Declan’s team, so now would be a good time to mention that she’d like a transfer...and then start tomorrow as far away from Declan as physically possible. But as she opened her mouth to speak her courage flailed and then collapsed in a puddle.
Was leaving the team the right thing to do? Or should she just wrestle her stupid wayward emotions into some kind of order? Was she just a wobbling mess of overreaction?
‘I...er...I’m good, thanks.’
Ethan gave her a small smile. ‘Thanks for moving across to work with Declan’s team. You helped us out of a big hole there.’ He nodded towards Declan. ‘He has a lot on his plate, holding the fort here while Leo’s away, on top of his workload and other commitments. Lucky for us he knows just how to pander to royals.’
‘I like them. They’re just as frightened as the rest of us when it comes to surgery, and they all need our help. Besides, Safia can’t help her background. Kara’s been great with her, though—settled her down...got her to open up...’ Declan grinned, fully aware of Kara’s discomfort. ‘I don’t know what I’d do without her if she left. Anyway, what can I do for you, Ethan?’
Declan offered him a seat, which he ignored.
‘A drink?’
Ethan glanced over to the decanters but shook his head. ‘No, thanks. I just wanted to have a quick chat about cover for Mitchell and Grace’s leave... As you know, their wedding’s coming up so we’ll be two more surgeons down, leaving us short-staffed to cover on-call responsibilities at the clinic. If anyone else goes we’ll be in big trouble.’
Declan turned to Kara and raised his eyebrows. ‘Actually, Kara was just saying—’
‘That I’m more than happy to stay on until Karen gets back.’
She threw Declan a look that she hoped would convey how frustrated she felt. What was the use in arguing? Clearly there was a lot riding on her placement here, and creating personnel issues wouldn’t leave them well disposed to writing her a good reference.
And who in their right mind would walk away from working at the glamorous Hunter Clinic? Its client list was a who’s-who in movie world cosmetic surgery, and Ethan’s charity work brought in heartbreaking yet challenging cases from war-torn areas. As a place to hone her
craft it was the very best in the world. It was too good an opportunity to give up just because of a kiss.
Three kisses.
Three kisses going nowhere. She was over trying to save things that were going nowhere. Like her marriage. And as it looked as if she was stuck working with Declan she’d keep her heart well out of it. She could do that.
She could.
* * *
A flurry of footsteps tapping on the marble floor out in the corridor had them all turning towards the door. Kara breathed out, grateful for the added distraction.
‘Here you all are! Makes a change for me to be crashing into someone else’s room.’
The Hunter Clinic head, Leo Hunter, stalked in, wearing a huge grin. Following right behind, her hand firmly in her new husband’s grip, came Lizzie.
‘Thought you’d all be home by now—it’s getting late.’
‘Just catching up on things.’ Declan strode over and shook his friend’s hand warmly. ‘Good to see you. Good honeymoon? Or shouldn’t I even ask?’
‘Great. I think it was France, right? Didn’t get out much...far too busy...’ Leo winked as he shared the joke with Declan, but then his smile slipped a little as he looked over to his brother, Ethan, who cautiously smiled back. ‘Hello, Ethan.’
‘Hi, Leo. Lizzie.’ Ethan walked over, his face serious and his shoulders hitched. He grazed his sister-in-law’s cheek with a hurried kiss, shook his brother’s hand quickly, then stepped away.
Kara watched with interest as the family dynamics came in to play. With his broad smile and easy manner Leo was clearly pleased to be back at the clinic he’d worked so hard to salvage from scandal and near ruin. Whereas Ethan’s response was...guarded to say the least.
Again, the gossip machine had informed her of the rift between the brothers that was slowly healing but was not quite mended yet. For two people so passionately involved in putting lives back together they had resolutely failed to fix their own. There had been difficult scenes, terrible arguments and times when the brothers had clashed spectacularly. But after Ethan had been best man for Leo and Lizzie’s wedding there had been some new, more friendly ground covered. Although, as far as Kara could see, the smile Ethan gave them still didn’t quite reach his eyes.
Declan stepped forward and kissed Lizzie’s cheek too. Warmth emanated from his smile. The contrast between him and Ethan was startling.
‘You look great, Lizzie. Tell me, how was Paris?’
‘Très amazing, thank you. Just...amazing.’ She turned to Leo, her eyes shining brightly. ‘Can we tell them? Please?’
Her husband gave her an indulgent smile, his love evident in the protective arm round her shoulder and pride shimmering in his face as he looked only at her but spoke to the room. ‘Okay...so, we have news.’
‘I’m pregnant!’ Lizzie blurted out, running a hand over her still flat stomach. ‘We’re having a baby.’
Leo kissed the top of her head. ‘Yes. And we couldn’t be more happy.’
Some people could have it all—work, marriage, love. As flutters of sadness whirled through her gut Kara forced out a smile, feeling, she thought, exactly the way Ethan looked right now: empty. Hollowed out.
But still he stepped forward and again shook his brother’s hand, almost as if he was doing what he knew was polite rather than what he deep down wanted to do. ‘Congratulations.’
‘That’s great news!’ Declan gave them all a broad grin. ‘Really fantastic. Seems it’s all weddings and babies at the moment. Do you think there’s something in the water?’
‘Oh, yes, it’s Grace and Mitchell’s wedding in a couple of weeks, isn’t it? Exciting!’ Lizzie positively glowed with happiness. She glanced at her watch. ‘Gosh, look, we really should go. We haven’t even made it home yet, but Leo wanted to pop in here just to let you know we’re back. You know what he’s like—this clinic is his baby and he couldn’t possibly drive past and not say hi.’
‘You mean he wanted to see if the place has managed to survive without him? I think we’ve coped. Just.’ Declan laughed. ‘But you must be tired after your travels. Take your wife home, man. You have another baby to think about now. You can play surgeon-in-chief tomorrow.’
‘Okay. Okay. I’ll be in first thing tomorrow, if you can spare the time for a hand-over?’ Leo looked at both Declan and Ethan, who nodded in agreement.
‘Of course.’
And with that bombshell Leo walked his new bride out, their excited chatter resonating off the walls as they wandered down the corridor. Ethan followed a moment later, muttering something about a case arriving from Afghanistan in an hour or so and how not everyone needed to wear their hearts on their sleeves. Leaving Kara alone again with Declan, a whirlwind of emotions fluttering through her stomach.
Grateful that it wasn’t her own private life in the spotlight, she commented on the scene that had just played out. ‘Was it just me or did Ethan not seem particularly thrilled at the prospect of becoming an uncle?’
‘He’s had a rough ride, Kara. You of all people should understand that.’
Yes, she knew enough about rough times. About loss and grief. About the way dreams didn’t become reality. That no matter how hard you tried to love someone, sometimes it wasn’t enough. ‘I guess...’
‘Having seen first-hand how traumatic injuries affect soldiers...’
‘Oh, yes. Of course.’
Declan shrugged and walked her towards the door, his hand on the small of her back, its heat sending her mind into a fuzz.
‘But I think it’s more than that. Between you and me, I think Ethan might be a touch jealous of Leo’s happiness. It’s something he’s not been able to find for himself.’
‘I heard they don’t have an easy relationship.’
‘There were issues between them in the past... That’s why he joined the army, apparently—to get away from the messed-up Hunter family dynamic. And that, in turn, is why he’s like he is now.’
She thought back to the way Ethan’s jaw had tightened at the pregnancy news, the shadows that had formed under his eyes, the hollows in his cheekbones—jealousy? Without a doubt.
But she also knew that you had to dig very deep and get through tough times—find another focus, like work, and bury yourself in it. There was no point dwelling on what you couldn’t change. It seemed Ethan, with his devotion to his work, was following the same mantra.
‘Hey, are you okay?’ Declan touched her arm. ‘You seem a little quiet.’
If he’d just move his hand she wouldn’t feel like leaning against him. Confiding in him. Asking him to kiss her again, fourth time lucky.
‘Is that so strange?’
‘Actually, yes. I never thought... All this talk of weddings must hit a raw nerve for you.’
The wedding hadn’t been the problem. It had been the marriage. ‘My wedding was a long time ago...it was a perfect day, exactly how I’d planned it. It’s just a shame everything turned out the way it did in the end. But I’d never begrudge anyone a bit of happiness.’
‘Fair play to you, Kara. That’s my girl.’
His voice softened as his hand ran up her spine in a tender gesture that made her want to rest her head on those broad shoulders and just stop. Stop fighting this attraction. Stop trying to do the right thing when she wanted so desperately to do the wrong thing—with him.
‘And you’re staying on the team? No more talk of leaving?’
She pulled herself away from him. She’d managed perfectly well on her own up to now and she could do it again. And again. Unlike his mother and Safia she didn’t need Declan’s strength. She had enough of her own. She knew not to rely on anyone else because when it came down to it their promises pretty well amounted to nothing. Especially men like Declan—players; men who wanted everything but gave little in return. Well, he could h
ave her one hundred per cent work commitment and that was all.
‘I guess you boxed me into a corner there. So, yes, I suppose I’ll stay. Even though now Leo’s back you won’t be so busy.’
‘I’m always busy. I like it that way. Besides, he’ll need time to catch up.’ He gave her a wicked smile that threw her a challenge. ‘Think you can keep your hands off me?’
‘Oh, don’t worry, Declan. I know I can.’ Even though it would take a huge effort. ‘Good night.’
Then she walked out of his office without looking back. Truth was, she had no idea how she was going to get through the next few weeks with any scrap of sanity left.
CHAPTER SEVEN
ALL WENT WELL for the next two weeks. Kara managed to maintain a respectable distance and Declan appeared to be trying too. Not once had they shared another kiss, or even a proximity that might generate one, even in the moments they spent together going over their cases.
Although the heat flickered between them like a smouldering fire—one small, wayward spark and she had no doubt things could get way out of control—she kept a lid on her emotions during the day. Only at night did she allow herself to relive those moments of closeness she’d shared with him.
So it was good to get some perspective now, on a rare day off, on her own out in the fresh air, taking in some of London’s famous sights.
Having taken way too many photographs of the magnificent Globe Theatre, she wandered along Queen’s Walk by the Thames. Barges glided past, and a cruise tour boat with people hanging out of open windows, cameras snapping, pointing and laughing. The river was as busy as the land on this bright sunny day.
In the distance the iconic sand-coloured Westminster Palace and its famous clock tower, Big Ben, dominated the view. She wandered along the paved walkway, weaving through the clusters of tourists taking photographs, past buskers and living statues, dodging jugglers and Latin American street dancers that added an exotic pulse to the atmosphere. The park was just a little farther along, next to the London Eye Ferris wheel, where somehow Mitchell and Grace had managed to land permission to hold their wedding reception.
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