I look to Sage. “What the fuck happened?”
He points at an object on the ground. “Grab that and let’s get out of here. I’ll explain on the way.”
Ash scoops up the white thing with a frown and holds it up.
“It’s a fucking horn.” I gather Eva closer, cradle her to me, and turn away from the incorporeal djinn. He was supposed to be taking care of her, and look at her. Fucking look at her.
“Trust me, that thing is important,” Sage insists. “That horn is going to save us all, but first we need to save Eva.”
“On that we’re in total agreement.” My words are laced with bitterness, but I’ll be damned if I give a shit about hiding my emotions right now.
I break into a jog. Ash keeps stride with me, but Elias shoots off ahead, probably to alert Jace, who is guarding the van. Sage has lost his host. Eva is unconscious and burning up, and who the fuck were the cloaked figures in the green mist? Yeah, he was supposed to make sure she was okay. He bloody failed.
The Feral we killed to get to Eva lie in pieces all over the forest. I make sure not to trip on any limbs, and then we’re on the road headed toward the van. Jace flicks on the lights as we approach to illuminate our surroundings, gray and nondescript. Eva doesn’t moan or stir as I climb into the back of the van with her. Ash reaches for her, but I hold her tighter. Fuck that, he’s had her to himself for too long. All those nights when he curled up around her, held her, inhaled her, and I, the fucking fool, kept my distance.
Dammit. What if this was it? What if time was up. No. Not thinking like that. Not going there. But my chest is too tight and my breath catches in my lungs as we jostle and careen toward home. She is a limp doll, pale and glistening with perspiration from a fever. The fever that is probably the precursor to her death.
I catch Elias’s eye. The Vladul is stony-faced, chest rising and falling too fast. He feels it too. The dread, the spiral. We’re in it, and there is no climbing out. But the questions remain, a bitter pill on my tongue.
I pin Sage’s incorporeal form with a steely gaze. “What the fuck happened?”
SAGE
By the time we enter the bunker, Eva is screaming incoherently. Her eyes roll in her head, her body thrashes. Welts emerge across every exposed part of her body and then disperse. Her skin reddens and blisters and then smooths out. It is as if her body is fighting itself. Logan’s teeth are gritted, his biceps straining as he maintains a grip on her thrashing form. Ash signs angrily, and with a growl Logan passes Eva to him. We run through the corridors, past frightened-looking humans, and burst into the med lab.
Jamie looks up as we enter, and his face pales.
“On the gurney. Hold her still,” he instructs.
They push through me, past me—the apparition, the fucking ghost. Logan and Ash do the honors, pinning her down while Jamie examines her pulse and looks under her eyelids. He draws blood and rushes it to his machines. Eva screams and arches her back. The sound claws at my soul.
“Can’t you give her something for the pain?” Elias bites out.
“Jace, morphine in the cabinet,” Jamie throws over his shoulder.
How can he be so calm?
Jace’s hands tremble as he draws morphine into a syringe, and then he is injecting Eva. Her screams die off, and she slumps onto the gurney and slips into unconsciousness.
Jamie turns to the group. “We need to get her to a contained unit now. Do you have somewhere?”
Jace nods. “Yes. Jamie, what’s happening?”
Jamie shakes his head. “I need to run more tests, but meanwhile, we need to secure her. Put her into a medically-induced coma for now. Do it now.”
“Why?” I push forward into his line of sight, and he blinks at me in surprise. “She was fine, better than fine. She told me she felt amazing.”
“It happens like that sometimes. A burst of energy, an overwhelming feeling of wellbeing just before—”
“Don’t.” I reach for his throat, and my hand passes through him. “Don’t you fucking say it.”
His smile is meant to be consoling, but it makes me want to set him on fire.
“Say what?” Logan turns on Jamie, and his hands have no issue grasping hold of the scientist’s lapels. “What the fuck are you saying, you little weasel?”
“Logan.” Jace tugs on Logan’s shoulder. “Let him go. This isn’t his fault.”
Logan shrugs off his brother. “For once in your fucking life, get off the fence and take a side. This is his fault, his fault and her lying fucking dad’s fault. They did this to her. They created something amazing and now … now …” He shoves Jamie away and turns back to Eva.
Ash is bent over her, his forehead pressed to hers, his lips moving silently as if in prayer.
The door opens behind me, and Noah steps into the room. “What’s happening?” His gaze travels from Jamie to Eva to Logan and his frown clears. “Oh, God.”
Suddenly, everyone is talking at once, and I’m helpless—unable to touch, unable to feel. Fuck this. I back out of the room and glide down the corridor. I need a host, and I need one now, because I need to hurt something, hit something. I need to feel.
A human male stands in my path. I know him. His name is Leo, one of the original volunteers that hadn’t made the cut the first time we recruited hosts, but right now he is perfect. His eyes widen as I approach and slip into his mind.
Leo, I need your help.
ELIAS
Jamie studies the blood samples. The scientist’s face says it all and my blood runs cold. An image of Eva comes to mind. She’s trapped in a glass cell all alone. They’ve put her into a chemically-induced coma to slow down the deterioration, to stop her pain, and to protect the facility because he believes …
She can’t die. She can’t.
I grab the scientist’s shoulder. Damn him and his silence. Damn him for everything. “There has to be something we can do to buy her more time. Enough to get her to Genesis and the high-tech equipment. I know someone who can maybe help her.”
Jamie slowly straightens and gently pushes the microscope to one side. “I wish there was, Elias. Her body is burning up from the inside and the chemical bonds holding together her DNA are breaking. Mutations are resulting in clusters of rapidly growing cancer cells.”
How can he be so factual, so fucking cold? My glare has him ducking his head. Good, because there is a lump in my throat and heat behind my eyes. Dammit, Vladul do not cry. This can’t be the way it’s meant to end. She wasn’t meant to die. Our savior, and the only woman that has succeeded in stirring my broken, damaged heart.
“I’m sorry,” Jamie says. “I truly am.”
There is no arguing with the evidence even though every fiber of my being wants to fight. Time is too precious to waste in denial. “How long?”
“I don’t know. Minutes, maybe a couple of hours. It’s moving fast, ripping through her, and when the end comes a massive amount of energy will be released. The containment unit should keep it from tearing this place apart.”
But it would tear her to shreds. Incinerate her. There would be nothing left … Nothing.
I turn away, fists clenched so hard my nails bite into my palms. “I have to warn the others.”
He cleared his throat. “I would be quick about it, Elias.”
I glance back at him, at the weary human face of the man who created the greatest thing of all.
Eva.
And then I stride from the room.
ASH
They are all arguing, fighting over whether she should wake up one last time. Whether we should say goodbye. I stare at the horn in my hand. Her weapon, our salvation, and resist the urge to crush it. It’s useless to us now, not because she won’t be here to wield it but simply because she will no longer be here.
Her hair spills over the lip of the gurney we have strapped her to, and her face is peaceful in repose. She is a picture, a portrait of wonder, and all the words, all the very many words that I would have lov
ed to say to her swirl in my mind, unsaid and redundant. My heart aches, a physical fucking ache that makes me want to reach in and rip it out, but then she would be lost to me. The pain of her loss will be all I have left once she is gone, and I will not lose that.
There is no me without her. There is nothing without her. I let the agony wash over me as they argue whether we should wake her one last time, whether we should allow her to know that she is about to die just so we can say goodbye, or whether we should allow her to be incinerated while in her coma.
“It’s cruel to wake her,” Jace says. “It’s selfish.”
“Fuck you, Jace. Easy for you to say, you don’t love her,” Logan snarls.
For once, I’m in agreement. For once, I want to be like Logan and lash out, but I rein it in, for her, out of respect for the only woman I have ever loved.
Jace presses his lips together and turns away, and I see it in his eyes, the spark that he’s been hiding, the pain that he feels now knowing he will never tell her how he feels. His decision to allow her to slip away is selfless. Fuck. Aw, bloody fuck. The poor bastard.
Sage is silent and brooding, arms folded across his chest. We lock eyes, and I feel his hurt and indecision. Elias is at the glass, his hand pressed to it, his eyes on Eva as she slumbers while her body bubbles with blisters and welts.
“Ash, you’re with me, right?” Logan asks. “We should get to say goodbye.”
Say goodbye. I clench my jaw so hard my teeth ache. When have I ever had the luxury of saying anything? My hands have spoken, my eyes have spoken, and Eva … Eva heard, Eva listened. She was the only one who heard my heart. Anger is a churning tsunami in my chest because even if we wake her, I cannot touch her without causing pain, and the morphine in her system will prevent her from reading my eyes. I take a deep breath and ground myself, allowing the earth to soothe my rage, allowing it to absorb it and give me clarity.
This isn’t about what we would want. This is about Eva. And I know without a shadow of a doubt that she would want to be aware. Knowledge, control, and choice are who she is. She would want to face her fate, and she would want to say goodbye.
Wake her, I sign. It’s what she would want.
Jace closes his eyes and exhales through his nose in resignation. Logan’s sigh is one of triumphant relief. The fool. The arrogant, cowardly fool. How much time did he waste? But it isn’t anger that moves me, it’s pity.
Sage meets my gaze and nods, and Elias walks to the door to the cell.
“Jace?” Logan bites out.
“Fine,” Jace says. “I’ll wake her, but no one goes in. This isn’t just about us, there are other lives at risk here.”
No one talks about how without her there is no way into Genesis, no way to get the cure out. Good, because if they did, they’d find their face stuck to my fist.
Nothing fucking matters.
Nothing except her.
JACE
I’m sorry, Eva. So sorry. I should have told you how I felt. I was scared. I needed to be sure and now it’s too late. The words I will never say flow through my mind as I turn off the chemical that is keeping her in a coma. She will wake in a few minutes.
I increase the morphine drip. It will make the world a haze. It will keep the panic and fear at bay.
“Is it done?” Logan asks.
I clench my fists. I’m not the violent sort, but right now Logan’s face is begging to be rearranged. He acts as if this is my fault. As if I’m standing between him and her. Fuck him. If not for the fact that I’d faltered, that I’d almost let him drain her, we’d be closer now than this friend zone. I’d have been able to tell her how I feel without looking like a bastard for almost letting my brother drain her. There’d been a spark, there’d been potential for us, and I’d been captivated.
God, who was I kidding? This was my fault. All mine. Logan had made a move, accepted his mistakes and laid his heart on the line while I’d hung back, afraid to take that step and say what was in my heart, and now it was too late.
“She’s stirring,” Sage says.
I blow out a breath and make my way over to the cell.
NOAH
My boys stand at the glass, unaware of my presence, unaware of anything but her. Eva, the woman they love, is shielded from my view. Her death will break them. It will tear this group apart. Would I be in love with her if I’d gone with them? Would time have brought us closer? Would this minute human with power in her blood to save the world have stolen my heart?
The answer is simple.
Yes.
She is a survivor, and that is an attractive trait. I would have gravitated toward her, and yes, I would have loved her with a passion that would have burned us both. I know this, and the fact that it will never come to pass is a shard in my heart.
Best to hang back. Best to wait and then pick up the pieces. To be the glue that binds them together, because without her, our world will descend into further chaos. Without her, there will be no cure for the people.
“She’s waking up.” Jace presses his hand to the glass.
“What? Where am I?” Eva’s voice drifts through the intercom and a chasm opens up inside me, a pit of what ifs and lost tomorrows.
I’m sorry, Eva. So sorry.
Chapter Eighteen
The world was a floating haze, pleasant and warm. My limbs were lethargic and heavy. It was bright but not uncomfortable. What happened? My voice was thick and slightly slurred.
Yes. I’d said it out loud. I’d said the words.
“Eva?”
Jace? I turned my head to the sound of his voice and saw them all. My guys so close and yet so far. A barrier lay between us and my sluggish mind slowly put together the pieces. The Hunt … The Hunt had just left and then Logan was there and Ash too, but instead of going to them, instead of holding them, I’d been claimed by darkness.
This was no ordinary state.
There were drugs in my system and this was the containment unit, which could only mean one thing.
My insides quivered. “How long?”
Jace pressed his lips together and shook his head.
“We’re here, Eva. We’re here with you.” Logan’s voice was raw. His eyes bloodshot.
The urge to hold him washed over me, and I closed my eyes briefly until it passed.
“Shit, Eva, are you in pain?” Jace asked.
I opened my eyes and smiled at him. “No. I’m not. I’m fine.”
But I wasn’t. My insides were shaking as reality set in. I was about to die. This was it. This was my end. I scanned their faces, seeing grief and anger. Mainly anger, and terror shot through me because I knew that look. I’d seen it in the mirror when my father had died. The need to hurt, to blame, to have a focus, and for me the key had been that focus, but with me gone and no way to get into Genesis they’d turn on each other. They’d blame themselves. Oh, God.
I grit my teeth and glared at them in turn. “Listen. You listen to me. You have the cure and you will get it to the people. You will find a way, do you hear me, because if you don’t, my existence, my death, will mean nothing. Do you hear me?”
Ash’s eyes flashed silver. His jaw tensed and he nodded.
Jace’s bottom lip trembled. “Eva …”
“We hear you,” Sage said.
Logan nodded, his nostrils flaring with emotion.
Elias locked gazes with me and inclined his head once, his eyes filled with shadows.
“Promise me. Promise me you’ll get the cure to the people, that you’ll free Tobias. Promise me you’ll save the world.”
There was a moment of silence, a beat where there was only a strangled sob and soft cursing. My vision was blurring, making it hard to see them, pulling me away from them.
Promise me …
Had I said it out loud? Had I?
“We promise. Promise, Eva…”
Love you. Love you all so much. So … Fire … so much fire …
Stars up above, twinkling like diamonds,
and a cool breeze ruffling my hair. Marble beneath my bare feet. A bridge, glowing softly, calling me forward. I began to walk, because what else was there to do. I was here, and this was the way. The water shimmered on either side of me, silver and smooth. There was somewhere I needed to be, people I needed to be with, but it all seemed far away now. There was only the bridge and the destination.
Two figures came into view—tall and broad and imposing. Were they waiting for me? No. They were deep in conversation. Maybe they were travelers like me? Maybe they could tell me where I needed to go? I picked up the pace, and as I got closer they turned to me, one with a smile, the other with a frown.
“Hello, can you help me?”
“Yes, I believe we can,” the dark-haired man said. He was beautiful like a painting. His dark hair was long and thick and tucked behind his ears. His clothes were tailored and black with silver seams winking like starlight. “We’ve been waiting for you, Eva.”
“You know my name?”
“We know everything there is to know about you,” the other man said. Whereas the first man was dark, this one was fair. Golden hair and pale skin with eyes the color of a summer sky. “You’re just on time.”
“On time for what?” I was so confused. The bridge was calling. “I need to get going. I think. I think I have to keep going.” I tried to side-step them, but the fair one gently grasped my arm.
“No, Eva. You don’t belong here. Not for a long, long time.”
I looked up at him, into the chiseled planes of his face, and questions surged to the surface of my mind. “Where am I?” I’d been somewhere else. Somewhere important and bright. “What is this place?” Panic squeezed my heart. “I … I was somewhere else.”
The golden-haired man smiled. “See, Veles, she’s already remembering her mortal life.”
For the Reign Page 14
