“They know when they’re hungry again and they’re not shy about telling us.” I chuckle and take Nate from his hold. “Here, Rod, have a bottle for Lyra while I feed this one.”
Before I have a chance to settle down with the baby, the phone rings. With Juliana still in the hospital and family calling daily to check on the babies, we never miss a phone call. When I glance at the screen, I snatch the phone up with my free hand. Jules rarely calls this time of morning. She usually waits until the twins are down for their nap so we have a few minutes to chat uninterrupted.
“Daisy, I’m sorry to bug you so early. I know you’re busy with five kids, including my brother, but I could really use your advice about something. Do you have a minute or thirty to talk me off the ledge?”
“You’re not bugging me. Of course I always have time for you. I’m just sitting down to feed Nate. We can talk while he takes his bottle.”
I settle into my comfy chair, arrange the baby in one arm, and tell her to fill me in on what’s causing her so much concern.
“Is Rod listening?” Her hesitancy piques my interest. She rarely keeps anything from her brother.
“No, it’s just you and me. He’s in the kitchen with Lyra, Isa, and Landen. Spill it, little sis. I know this isn’t about your treatments.”
“Then you know me too well.” It’s good to hear her chuckle. There was a long time I didn’t expect to hear it again. “I’m afraid I’ve gotten myself into a pickle and I’m not sure how to get out of it.”
“What have you done? And how did you do it while you’re still in the hospital?”
“After Rod went to visit Gabriel, Karen told me Gabe had asked a few people about Isa and me. I sent a message back through Karen, clearly letting him know not to ask or think about us. He made it all too clear he had no intentions of ever being in our lives when he disappeared on us. Isa was only three months old when he deserted us. Rod helped me go through the process of having his parental rights stripped when he didn’t return.
“The only excuse I have for my stupidity now is the medications muddied my mind.”
“What stupidity are we talking about, Jules?” I have a strong suspicion of what, but she needs to confirm it.
“I’ve been in this isolation room alone for so long. The nurses are great, but they don’t have enough time to stay in here and chat with me. So, when my phone rang, I had to answer it, even though I didn’t recognize the number. At that point, I was ready to chat up the telemarketers and keep them on the line for a change.”
“Who was on the phone, Jules? It was Gabriel, wasn’t it?” I close my eyes, knowing how my husband will react to this news when she shares it.
“Yes, it was Gabe, and I didn’t hang up. I thought about it, I really did. But I didn’t follow through. When he said he hasn’t stopped thinking about Isa or me since the last time I saw him, I had to hear him out. Daisy, I needed to know what was so wrong with me. I had to know what would make him desert us.”
“Did he give you an answer that settled your mind?”
“He was very vague, but he swore on his life it wasn’t anything to do with me. He said it wasn’t even that he was scared of responsibility. But he never gave me a full explanation, other than he wasn’t good enough for me and never had been. He said he’d pretended to be something he wasn’t his entire life, and that lie finally caught up with him. He said he couldn’t pretend anymore because he didn’t want to hurt me. I got the feeling he didn’t realize how much his leaving devastated me… as if he thought he was doing me a favor. It’s hard to explain right now, but I felt sorry for him, Daisy.”
“Jules, are you looking for closure with him? Or are you looking for a reason to forgive him?”
“That’s a trick question, Daisy Stone. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re trying to entrap me.”
“You’re not fooling anyone, little girl. You’ve entrapped yourself. Now answer my question.”
“Ugh, I don’t know what my answer is. Tell me it’s the drugs. Tell me my brain is on narcotics and all kinds of other mind-altering medications. Tell me I’m not competent to make decisions for myself in my current state and you’ll take over everything from here.”
“Because if I don’t, you’ll let him right back into your life, your bed, and your heart. Right?”
“What should I do, Daisy? He calls every day, usually several times a day, even if he only has a minute or two to talk. Every time, he sounds surprised I answered, and he keeps stressing he doesn’t deserve me, but he can’t walk away again. I’ve texted him pictures of Isa through the years, showing him how much she’s grown and changed. He’s amazed at how much she looks like me. The more we talk… I don’t know. Now, I’m coming home soon, and I’m afraid I’ve started something I can’t finish.”
“You’re afraid you’ve started something you want to finish, Jules. I don’t think you’re lying to me. It’s more that you’re not being honest with yourself. You’re about to spring out of jail, then there won’t be an isolation room separating you and him anymore. I’ll ask you the same thing Tracy asked me when I was confused as to what I should do.
“Take everyone else out of the equation. Never mind what Rod will say about it. What kind of life do you want for yourself and your daughter? To take that a step further, can Gabriel provide the life you need?”
“If I had only me to think about, I’d say I could give him a second chance. But I have to put Isa first. As a mother and her only parent, I can’t forget he left us both, and I can’t take the chance he’d do it again. Isa’s old enough now to be devastated by his indecisiveness.”
“Sounds like you already know what comes next, but you’re not ready to take the next step just yet.”
“I think—.” She pauses, as if she’s figured out what she needs to do.
“Thank you for talking me through this, Daisy. Now I know what I have to do. Regardless how much I want to believe he’s changed, and he wouldn’t do that to us again, the fact is I have no way of knowing for sure. When he calls again, I’ll tell him I made a mistake in letting this go on as long as I have, but it’s time to leave the fantasy world behind.”
“You know, I can’t help but think you’re saying that because you’ll have to see him face to face when you’re discharged. You feel safe carrying on with him while you’re in the hospital, but that’s about to change, possibly along with the rest of your life. There was a time you would’ve told me to stay away from Rod because of his past behavior. If I’d listened, we wouldn’t be where we are now. I believe everyone deserves a second chance if they’re truly repentant.”
“How do I know if he’s really sorry? How can I be sure he won’t run again?”
“Take it one day at a time, Jules. You don’t have to make a life-long decision today. You don’t even have to let him meet Isa until he’s convinced you he’s a changed man.”
“All right. One day at a time, then. I’ll try not to think about how I gave him all I had, and he threw it away like garbage.”
“Focus on the future, Jules. Think about all you have now.”
EPILOGUE
Rod
Six Months Later
“Nate, you get back here. Where do you think you’re going?” I scoop my baby boy up with one arm just before he reaches the stairs, and he giggles as if he’s thoroughly amused. Not that he’d get far since we have baby gates up everywhere, but it sure doesn’t stop him from trying his hardest.
My babies are crawling now and getting into everything in this house. Nate loves to explore and touch anything he can find. Lyra is more reserved, like her mother, but that precious smile of hers keeps me wrapped around her little finger.
Truth be told, I’m wrapped around all my kids’ fingers. Landen, Nate, and Lyra do no wrong in my eyes.
I carry him back into the den where the rest of my family is and put him down on his colorful comforter. With toys surrounding him, I thought he’d find one to keep him occupied, but he us
ually wants what he can’t have. This time, he picks up his toy car and repeatedly smacks it against the floor, cackling with every loud smash. At this point, I’m just glad he’s sitting still.
Lyra smiles as I approach and lifts her arms, signaling for me to pick her up. “How’s Daddy’s little princess this morning?”
She coos and pats my face with her tiny hand. Every one of her fingers and toes mesmerize me. There’s no way she doesn’t know how much she’s loved. Daisy and I tell all our kids multiple times every day.
“Daddy’s little princess is getting hungry. Here’s her breakfast.” Daisy extends her hand and I take Lyra’s bottle from her. Then she picks up Nate and settles into her comfortable chair, cradling him against her. “I’ll feed Harry Houdini here. He was in the playpen when I walked into the kitchen to get their bottles out of the warmer. In the thirty seconds my back was turned, he escaped from his little jail cell.”
“That’s my boy. I taught him everything he knows.” I beam with pride while she cuts her “mom eyes” at me. It’s the look that stops children in their tracks. Sometimes it works on me too.
“God help us if he’s learning tricks from you, Hot Rod.” She laughs, but the love in her eyes and in her tone is unmistakable. “So, are we still having that video conference with Chris?”
“Yes, I suppose we will. As long as he’s trying to make amends, I don’t feel right keeping him shut out of our lives. The video chat agreement was a compromise since I’m not quite ready for him to visit in person yet. Baby steps, but steps in the right direction, anyway. Our children deserve to have a huge, loving family. We’re fortunate to have so many relatives on your side.”
“For the record, I agree with letting him into our lives slowly and carefully. I’m protective of you and Jules, so if Chris hasn’t truly changed, I’ll be the first to cut him off again. But like you said, if he’s genuine, I’m thrilled for you to reestablish a relationship with your father. I think you’ve needed it more than you realize.”
“Just like Landen did?”
“Something like that.” She smiles at me, then turns her attention back to the bundle of joy in her arms. “Can you imagine not being in Landen’s, Nate’s, and Lyra’s lives when they’re grown?”
“Hell, no. That will never happen. One thing I’ve learned over the past six months is I’m nothing like my father was. This family is my entire world, and I don’t want to go more than a day without having all of you in my arms.”
Reflecting on the time that’s passed since the day Daisy and I met, I marvel at how far we’ve come and how much my life has changed. Before her, my life was cold and dreary. Now, I have all the love and life a man could ask for or want. She’s taught me more about forgiveness and charity in this short span than I’d learned over the rest of my thirty-six years combined. We’ve had a bumpy road getting here, but this is our life now.
Our family.
My family.
Finding Daisy has given me something I never thought I’d experience. A love of my own, a home full of laughter, and a desire to fill every empty room with as many children as my wife will allow. I’m still working on her to set a date of when we can expect the next set of twins. She accuses me of trying to kill her, but I’m just overjoyed with being a father. That’s something I never thought I’d say.
She decided not to return to teaching soon after the twins were born. I convinced her to take her full maternity leave, but she was anxious to get the My Heart of Stone venture up and running as soon as possible. She was far too concerned about all her “adopted” kids to disappoint them over the summer. Kevin and I made sure her camp was well provided for in her absence, with both of us volunteering to fill in the gaps. It was both humbling and invigorating to experience it firsthand.
Juliana and Isa moved out, back to their house, a couple of months after Jules was discharged from the hospital. My prayers have been answered daily, as there’s no sign of her cancer returning or her body rejecting the donor cells. It seems she’ll make a full recovery, and I couldn’t be happier. Although, I don’t see her nearly as much now as I did before she first started treatments. When I push her for an answer why she’s staying away more than usual, she tries to convince me I’m overreacting.
I don’t think I am.
The truth will come out eventually. I’ve learned that the hard way—no secret stays a secret for long. I have a sneaking suspicion about what’s going on in her world, but I’ve behaved and not bulldozed my way into her affairs. When she needs me, I’ll be here to pull her out of the fire, the same as I’ve always been, and always will be.
Daisy tells me to mind my own business and let Juliana live her own life. Maybe she’s right, but I can’t stop being the overprotective brother overnight. I know my sister, and there’s something she’s hiding from me.
In the meantime, the beauty in my bed every night has all my love, affection, attention, and devotion. Without her, I’d be a lonely, terrible man.
Daisy and I have experienced ups and downs in our relationship and in our lives, but we’ve weathered them together. Nothing has been perfect or easily worked out on its own. But we belong together. We’re bound together. We’re all we need to get through one more day with love and happiness.
“What’s going on in that handsome head of yours?” She interrupts my thoughts, and it’s only at the sound of her voice that I realize I’ve been staring at her.
“I was just thinking about how I’ve got all I want and all I need right here in this house. I am so in love with you, and I wouldn’t trade this perfect life we’ve made for anything in the world.”
Completely Captivated Sneak Peek
The End…Or Not
July, Present Day
This is the story of two very different men who are in love with the same woman. To grasp the full impact one person has on another’s life, I’m starting at what seems to be the end of the story. But don’t be deceived by appearances. I’ll just be getting started with my plans for them by the time you catch up with me.
Who gets the girl and lives happily ever after is yet to be seen. My part in this story will be made clear soon enough. Until then, I’d like to introduce you to Christa, Aaron, and Jared. How they started. Where they fell apart. Then you and I will see how they end up—together. This is their past. Their future is still to come.
Buckle up, buttercup. We’re all going for a ride.
Christa and Aaron walked hand in hand into the ultrachic, urbanely modern downtown office building. She was still reeling from their whirlwind weekend. Reality hadn’t yet set in, leaving her to question if she’d hallucinated everything that had happened. A beautiful, life-changing, dream-come-true hallucination.
If I am, don’t ever let me wake up, she thought.
As they crossed the marble floor of the lobby, she glanced over at Aaron for the hundredth time, convinced she was dreaming it all. A recurring unease ran through her mind and plagued her thoughts. She was desperate to ask if he felt as shocked with their new life as she did. Part of her wanted to know if the extreme mixture of excitement, fear, and exhilaration, immediately followed by sheer terror, overwhelmed him as much as it did her. But she didn’t want to be that girl—the needy, clingy, “What are you thinking?” type of girl.
Her thoughts drifted to how different everything she’d ever known was compared to just a few short months ago before she’d met Aaron. Even at her young age of twenty-two, she’d learned firsthand how life wasn’t fair. Her parents had made sure to teach her that valuable lesson.
She’d also accepted she’d never be lucky in anything. She’d been unlucky in having the big, loving family she’d dreamed of her entire childhood. As the only child of a deadbeat dad and a neglectful mother, the only people she could lean on were friends she’d made along the way. The Miller family had all but adopted her, giving her the only stability throughout her childhood.
Luck in money had escaped her, since she had scraped by on her very la
st dime for anything she’d ever had. She’d worked tirelessly to start her own business, rising early in the morning and remaining in her shop until late at night to get her café off the ground.
Finally, she’d most decidedly been unlucky in finding love. The few men she’d made time to date turned out to be less stellar than she’d initially thought. Or dared to hope. But after the last three days, she was finally convinced her luck had changed for the better, that true love could happen, that happiness could last.
As they walked into the posh office building, nausea washed over her in repetitive waves when she realized she was completely out of place and notably underdressed. Elegant, professional women clicked by in their stiletto heels, with their hair perfectly coiffed and their nails fashionably manicured, wearing their expensive designer business clothes. Unlike everyone else, she was dressed in faded jeans, off-brand Ugg-type boots, and a generic name sweater. Her long, straight blond hair usually refused to cooperate, preferring to hang loosely on her shoulders.
She was grateful Aaron held her hand tightly in his, paying no attention to the beautiful women surrounding them. His strength flowed into her through their connected hands, giving her the courage to face whatever awaited them.
The security guard noticed her first and stood as though to stop her. The moment he realized she was with Aaron, his demeanor changed. “Good morning, Mr. Rivers.”
“Good morning, Ty.” Aaron dismissed the guard with a nod.
Aaron pushed the up button, and they were soon joined by several other people in the morning rush to their posh offices. Neither spoke as the elevator climbed to the twenty-sixth floor, where he led Christa to an expansive corner office.
The space was professionally decorated, with pictures and sculptures arranged to be both visually pleasing and modernly chic. The large, dark cherry wood desk was strategically placed in the corner, facing the door but not obstructing the impressive view of the city from the floor-to-ceiling windows on each side. Her back was to the door, staring out at the sights, until the angry male voice behind her caught her attention.
All I Need: Rod & Daisy (All Of Me Duet Book 2) Page 22
