Lost in Silence (The Lost Series Book 1)

by Douglas, Tracie

  Her eyes grow wide and turn glassy.

  Shit.

  “I’m not angry with you,” I flounder trying desperately to redeem myself. “I’m not going to pretend like I know what you’ve been through but from what I can tell, he has you pretty fucked up. Whatever he did to you, whatever he expected of you, that’s not me.”

  She finally nods. The shock and awe of my words cover her face, leaving me to feel uncomfortable and raw under her gaze.

  I hate whatever it is she’s been through because the woman standing before me is nothing like the girl in the photo. Whatever it was has changed her and she will never be the same again. Her life is different forever because some asshole couldn’t take care of her properly.

  I cringe thinking about the woman she may have become if only her life had gone differently. One way or another, I vow to help her find the right path. Even if that meant killing Erik myself.

  “You can eat on the road,” I say lifting my duffel and placing it on the floor beside the bed. “Get your things together.”

  She walks over to the bathroom and pulls out a small bag filled with her clothes. My heart breaks, everything she owns is in that bag. She crosses the room, grabs the burrito, tucks it away and heads toward the door.

  “My truck is parked outside. It’s the black one. You can put your bag in the back,” she stops, her hand on the door, head turned towards me. “I want you to go with me.”

  Her eyes widen as every thought and feeling flit across her face. She’s struggling with the decision to head out on her own or trust me to keep her safe. She understands the danger she faces on her own, always looking over her shoulder. Something tells me this isn’t the first run in with him. She’s not always going to be this lucky and she knows it.

  She also knows the fear she has to conquer if she comes with me. She could leave here on her own and I would let her go, but her chance of survival is higher with me. Allowing herself close to another is going to be difficult for her. Hell, it’s going to be difficult for me. I haven’t let anyone in since...No, don’t think about that right now!

  “Detective Edwards, the officer who arrested your husband called while I was out,” her face falls and she tenses for bad news. It is bad news but Edwards has been good to his word. He’s kept me informed regarding the situation. They didn’t have enough on Erik to hold him and without her statement they’d have to release him. “He’s going to be released in a few hours.”

  Fear. Pure unadulterated fear fills her eyes. Her fingers fidget wildly as she contemplates her options. I patiently wait, ready to support whatever decision she comes to.

  Bullshit, I’m going to throw her ass over my shoulder and lock her in the truck if she walks out that door without me!

  “I’m headed north, to my home in Oregon. You are welcome to come along. He won’t be able to track you if you travel with someone, plus everyone believes you’ve left already.”

  She frowns.

  “I told them I heard you leave,” I pause debating if I should tell her about Edwards’ suspicions. I can’t, she’s already too wound up. “I know you’re afraid but I also know you want to trust me. You wouldn’t have knocked on my door, slept in my closet, if you didn’t already believe I am worthy of that trust. Please, let me help you.”

  She tilts her head to the side and sighs. Questions and doubt cloud her eyes, her fear temporarily placed on the side table.

  “I’m not married, no girlfriend or anyone who’d be upset if you came along. I’m not looking for someone to fill the role either. I live in a fairly small town, my sister lives down the street from me. She’s kind of nosey but she and my brother are all I have. My place is small but there’s a bed for you if you’d like one,” I can’t stop, it’s like word vomit spewing from my mouth. “I want you to be safe. No, I need you to be safe and I know if you walk out the door, you’ll never be safe. He will always be one step behind, on your heels. He will never let you rest. He will hunt until there is nothing left to hunt.”

  When I stop my breathing is labored and heavy in my chest. She is staring at me, shock written all over her face.

  I can’t blame her. I’m a complete stranger, obsessed with her safety. She probably thinks I’m a lunatic now. I’d think the same thing in her position.

  I run my hands through my hair and over my face. Crazy didn’t run in my family but I was beginning to question my sanity. I’m not equipped to handle her issues, I can barely handle my own. But I can’t walk away from her. It’s like there is some cosmic power pushing us together, getting stronger by the minute. I wonder if she feels it too.

  “I bet you think I am one crazy son of a bitch right now,” I say, an attempt to diffuse the tension in the room. I sit down onto the bed exhausted from the mental diatribe. I cover my face with my hands and sigh frustrated. What was I thinking?

  You aren’t supposed to care anymore. You aren’t supposed to let anyone in.

  I feel movement on the bed beside me. I look over and she is sitting a foot away. This is the closest she’s ever allowed me to be to her. My heart rate picks up.

  Chapter 5

  Alice

  I don’t know why I walked across the room and sat down next to him and I don’t know why I sat so close. It was the closest I’ve allowed anyone to be near me, of my own choosing, in years but I find his concern for me touching. It’s not something I’m used to. People don’t worry about me, at least not anymore. Erik made sure of it. Listening to Hudson talk about my safety and arguing my best chance for survival is with him was not something I expected, as much as I hoped for it.

  Last night, as I lay in his closet, I made the choice to accept any help he may offer me. I didn’t question the choice either. He made me feel safe, even cared for and I hadn’t felt that way in years. I wanted some way to keep him in my life, another shocking revelation for me but one I didn’t hesitate to embrace.

  My heart ached a little as I gathered my things, filling my bag with all that was mine, his words echoing in my head. You can eat on the road, get your things together. I wasn’t ready to leave him and my secret hope that he had felt this pull between us was wavering.

  I was surprised when he stopped me at the door, his declaration filling me with hope. Now, sitting next to him I realized I had misinterpreted the entire morning. When he spoke of leaving, he always used the words us or we. It was his plan to take me with him all along.

  Meeting his eyes, there’s a sadness buried deep. My heart and life experiences tell me something in his life has caused it. I can only imagine what might have put it there and I realize it had to be something awfully powerful to take down this strong and virile man. I’m familiar with this kind of sadness though, maybe we were kindred spirits.

  I want him to know I will go with him, to take some of the sadness away, so I nod and allow a brief smile to touch my lips. It’s an odd feeling but the small gesture puts a light in his eyes, one I like seeing in their blue-green depths. After a few moments, I shift uncomfortably under his gaze and look away. The intensity between us too strong for me, too much, making me nervous.

  “Thank you,” he sighs, his shoulders briefly slump forward in relief. He straightens quickly, his face more serious and determined. “We need to get going. I want to get some distance between us and this place sooner rather than later.”

  I stand up from my spot on the bed and reach down for my bag but his hand comes out of nowhere and grabs it. I take an instinctive step back. He notices and allows me the space but continues to hold onto my bag.

  “In case someone is watching me, I think we need to figure out a way to get you to my truck secretly,” he walks over to the windows and peers out, his eyes scanning. I nod and walk to the door, pulling on my gray sweater. “Wait, we need a plan.”

  I turn to him and nod, motioning with my hand for him to stay put. I can be invisible when necessary. Opening the door, I peer out and slip out onto the breezeway. I make my way down the stairs and I look over my s
houlder, knowing Hudson is watching, waiting for my signal. I flick my head and hear the door open as he steps out, our bags in hand. Slipping around the corner of the building, it’s my turn to wait.

  I hear him shuffle by walking towards the office, his room key dangling in hand. From my spot I can see Norma, Roland’s wife, behind the front desk, her hook-like nose buried in a cheap harlequin paperback. She wasn’t a talker, so Hudson would be in and out of there in no time. I had to move quick.

  Crouching low to the ground, I move slowly towards Hudson’s truck, using the vehicles around me to shield me from line of sight. His truck is one vehicle away when I hear the power locks release, my cue to move in. Slipping around the truck, I open the passenger door wide enough to allow my small form to slip in. I manage to squeeze between the seat and dashboard, out of sight and wait for him.

  Hudson climbs into the truck a few minutes later. Worry etched into his face. His eyes scan the parking lot before landing on mine in the cab. He smiles slightly, the worry replaced with relief. With a nod, the truck roars to life and he wastes no time pulling out of the parking lot and away from the motel.

  “You’re good,” he smirks. “I didn’t see you get in.”

  I can’t help smiling brightly. He notices.

  “A smile looks good on you, I like it,” his voice suddenly serious and an octave lower. My smile vanishes and I swallow hard. Looking away from him, my mind is reeling as his compliment hangs in the air.

  Alice, what are you doing, my mind screams. Do you want to wind up in another closet?

  I push the thought away from me. Hudson won’t hurt me. He’s nothing like Erik.

  You never thought Erik was like Erik either and then it was too late, I ignore the thought. I always questioned Erik in the beginning but I was never strong enough to voice my questions. Despite my friends who said it over and over, I couldn’t do it. I wanted them to be wrong, I needed them to be. If they were right then maybe my parents were right too and there was no way I could handle that. In the end, they were all right.

  I shake my head. Now wasn’t the time to dwell on my wrongs.

  “You can sit up now if you want,” his voice sounds far away in my thoughts. I slide up the seat and face forward. I pull the seat belt across my body and click it in place, aware of his observant eyes. We were crossing into dangerous territory and I wasn’t sure how to feel about it. All I was sure of was where ever we were going it was going to be a long ride and plenty of time to come up with a plan to deal with what was developing between us.

  *****

  Hudson

  She dozed off in the truck after lunch. A lunch she picked at more than she ingested. I’m sure it was because she was still full from breakfast. I’d bet the last three meals were the most she’d eaten in a long time. The thought makes me sick and it’s something I planned on changing once we were settled in.

  I pull out my phone, flipping it open to dial Sneak. I snuck out last night, after she had fallen asleep and called him in. I needed to check in with him to see if he found on the douche bag.

  “You must have a sixth sense, I was just dialing your number,” his voice greets me after the first ring.

  “Tell me you got something good for me,” I glance over at the sleeping woman next to me. She’s perfectly still and her breathing is even. Almost too even.

  Sneak was the youngest of our squad and a computer genius. There wasn’t anything he couldn’t hack. He was assigned to the team for a temporary mission but his talents proved more useful than anticipated, so he was transferred permanently. We survived many missions together, the last one being the worst. He didn’t make it out as well as I did but the way Sneak is, you’d never know anything about him was different.

  “I have something but I don’t know how good it is,” I can hear him jostling the phone while he gets his bearings.

  “I was afraid of that,” I keep my eyes on the road ahead.

  “The man you’ve asked me to investigate, Erik Scott, he doesn’t exist, at least not until eight years ago. I found record of his name but any information I could pull prior to the eight years was complete bullshit.”

  “What does that mean?” I ask confused.

  “Bear with me because this shit gets interesting. The information I was able to find is all basic, things like addresses, family members, etc. Shit law enforcement looks for, nothing to throw a red flag up. This I found odd considering everything you’ve told me about the situation. I dug deeper and I couldn’t find anything more. No bills, no credit information, no financial history, no work history, nothing prior to eight years ago. These are things every living person has record of, so there’s no reason he shouldn’t have it. I dug even deeper, man, checked out some of the addresses listed, known family members, his educational history and nothing came of it. It was all bogus.”

  “Again, what does that mean?” I ask even though I had a sneaking suspicion what it all meant.

  “The guy’s a fucking ghost Hudson,” his voice is clear, the words like bullets to my brain. “He’s got some powerful friends in high up places.”

  “Fuck,” I swear loudly and glance over at Alice, she hasn’t moved. “What about her? Were you able to find anything out about her?”

  “Nothing on an Alice Scott,” he answers.

  “He said she was his wife.”

  “There’s no record of a marriage on file,” he’s shuffling some papers, probably double checking his facts. “But I did find something about an Alice Michaelson, one of his last known addresses. The lease was in her name.”

  “She did say her name wasn’t Scott,” I explain. I hear a keyboard clicking in the background, he’s pulling more information up on Alice Michaelson.

  “She talking?”

  “No,” I breathe exasperatedly. “I don’t know if she can. She wants to, I’m thinking it has to do with her conditioning.”

  “That’s fucked up.”

  “You’re telling me.”

  “Alice Michaelson, born November eighteen, age twenty-five. A musician, studied at Juilliard but never finished, disappeared shortly after. Parents last known address is in Chicago. They’re also musicians. No siblings. Her grandfather is the famous violinist Carter Michaelson.”

  “That explains the finger twitching,” I sigh relieved to finally know something about the woman next to me. “Does it say what she played?”

  “Area of study was the violin,” he sighs. “This the girl?”

  “No doubt,” Alice shifts next to me, her eyes still closed but her breathing has changed. She’s awake. “Do a full work up and I will get back to you when I get home.”

  “She leave with you?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Good, should I fill King in then?”

  The last thing I wanted was to make that phone call. I didn’t need a voice of reason and that’s likely what King would be. He knows my history. He knows where my head is. He knows this will likely tear me apart and he’ll do what he thinks he has to, shield me from it. I didn’t want that though. If Sneak told him for me though, at least I’d have some time to prepare.

  “Let him know,” I rub my eyes. “Am I making the right choice bringing her home with me?”

  “I think so,” Sneak’s voice is filled with understanding. “King will think so too.”

  “I’m not equipped for this,” I argue. Sneak knows me almost as well as Kingston, despite the fact they were brothers in real life, they were my brother’s in blood.

  “If this shit is as bad as we think, then there’s no better person to handle it than you,” his words hit me where I need it most.

  “Sneak one more thing, shoot an email with everything you’ve pulled up on Erik Scott to Detective Sean Edwards with the LAPD. Don’t include anything about Alice though.”

  “Sure,” I hear him clicking away at his keyboard again. “They release him yet?”

  “Haven’t heard anything,” I answer.

  “Want me to check?” I did
but then I didn’t. I knew from what Sneak had found the police probably hadn’t found anything different. Sneak is the absolute best at what he does. Agencies from all over the world want him in their arsenal of hackers. Why he stays with us and our band of misfits is beyond me.

  “Yeah, let me know if you hear back from Edwards,” I sigh, the internal debate over. We needed the information.

  “What about Missy? You want me to let her know you’ll be back in town?”

  “I’ll deal with Missy when I get there,” it was all I said to him before snapping my phone closed. Missy could wait until we were home and settled.

  *****

  Alice

  I hear him flip his phone close and he takes a deep breath. Afraid to move or even breathe, I pretend to be asleep but I’m sure he’s not fooled. The sound of his voice confirms my thoughts, “I know you’re awake.”

  My eyes open against the bright sunlight pouring into the truck making me squint. I should’ve taken him up on his offer to buy me a pair of sunglasses at our last stop but he already spent too much money on me. What little money I did have, he refused. I straighten in my seat, crossing my legs at the ankle and placing my hands in my lap.

  “I wasn’t trying to hide the call from you,” he explains with his eyes on the road. I glance at him, my nerves buzzing in a different way. I guess being trapped in such a small place with someone all day can change things. It’s safe to assume he isn’t some crazed serial killer after all, I mean what kind of serial killer lets other people know you’re traveling with them. Unless their apart of some crazy plot to—stop it Alice, my brain screams.

  I shake my head, pushing aside my runaway thoughts to focus on the moment. If he wasn’t trying to hide the call, why wait until I was sleeping to make it? Who is Sneak and why did Hudson call him for information about Erik and I? It was almost as if he could read the questions running through my mind when he spoke, shocking me to my core. Maybe I wasn’t as unreadable as I thought.

  “I work for an elite investigation firm and Sneak is our information gatherer,” his eyes flick between me and the road as he continues. “Called him last night with Erik’s name and requested some research. Need to know what this asshole is about so I can keep my word and keep you safe.”