by Clare Flynn
The next morning the fire had gone out and there was a chill in the spring morning air and a slight touch of frost lacing the earth that Elizabeth had tilled so assiduously the day before. She sat beside Michael, as they drank tea on the veranda steps. She looked around her and asked herself if she could face living here for the rest of her life? With no Michael, no Mikey, no Susanna, and before long Will would doubtless marry and leave. There was only the faithful Verity and her days were occupied with the school. Why should she feel loyalty to Kidd when she had not married him of her free will?
Sitting next to Michael, her hand in his as they sipped their tea, the warmth of his body against hers, she knew with absolute certainty that she was meant to be with him. She was about to speak when he put down his empty mug. He fished in his pocket and handed her a small stone. She rolled it over in her palm, seeing the hole in the middle of what was otherwise an unexceptional large pebble.
'It were our Danny's. He never let it out of his sight. Drove Mam and me Da crazy. He'd play with it at table. Slept with it under the pillow. Always rolling it around in his hands. God knows why. He found it when he were just a wee thing and never gave it up. We called the dog Stone after it. Danny had it in his hand when he died. It's me most precious thing and I want you to have it.'
She frowned. 'I can't take that from you.'
'I want you to keep it. So I can tell meself that you have something of me.' He pressed her fingers around the stone. 'Keep it safe for me, lovely, along with me heart.'
'I will. It will be with me always. I still have your handkerchief. She reached into the pocket of her apron and pulled it out. I've had it with me all this time. It's grubby as I couldn't bear to wash it. It was all I had of you. I cried into it so many times thinking of you.'
She jumped up 'Wait! There's something I want you to have – as important to me as this stone is to you.'
She ran into the house and returned immediately and pressed a gold ring into his hand. 'My mother's wedding ring.'
'I can't take that.'
'Yes you can. For the same reason I'll take care of this stone.'
He looked down at the small gold wedding band then closed his palm over it and stood up, looking away from Elizabeth.
'I'd best be heading off then. I've things to do before I go. I need to clear me stuff out of the house in Sydney and tell Harriet she'll get her divorce in three years.'
He pulled her roughly to him and held her against his chest. She could hear the beating of his heart. They stood there motionless and suddenly she knew she couldn't stay here without him. It was like a dam breaking and all the pent up emotions and fears of the past few years broke through and she held onto him as though he were a rock in a stormy sea.
'I'll come with you. I can't live without you. Not any more. Not after this. I just couldn't bear it.'
'You mean it? You'll come? Oh God, Elizabeth, I'll never let you regret it for a moment. You've made me so happy.' His eyes shone and she fancied she could see the beginnings of tears in them. 'My dearest darling. Thank you.'
'But you need to give me a few days. I have to tell Jack. I owe him that much.'
'We'll tell him together.'
'No. You have to let me do this. If you're there he'll be angry and who knows what he'll do. You have to trust me to deal with it myself. And I want to say goodbye to Verity and Will. You go on to Sydney and sort the tickets and I'll join you. When does the ship sail?'
'Noon on Thursday from Circular Quay.'
'I'll see you there then. On the quayside.'
'I should stay here with you and face Kidd together.'
'Trust me to do this myself. I know how to handle Jack. It's better I do it on my own. He'll be back here tomorrow. I'll tell him then. Now go, my darling.'
He slung his bag over his shoulder and pulled on his hat and they walked hand in hand along the worn dirt track to where he had left the small truck he had driven out in. He gathered her into his arms for the last time, kissed her slowly and tenderly then climbed into the cabin and drove away. She watched, with a longing for him that was like a physical pain, until the truck had disappeared in a cloud of dust.
Chapter Twenty-One – The Killing
She was hanging out the washing. Absorbed in the mundane task she didn't hear his approach until his hands were over her eyes.
'Jack?' she cried, surprised at the unusual show of affection. Her stomach flipped knowing she must break the news of her leaving him.
She felt the roughness of his skin and smelled the alcohol on his breath, then when he dropped his hands she saw it was the son, not the father.
'Get out of here!'
'Not so fast, Mother dear. We have a lot to talk about.'
'I want you to leave immediately. My husband will be home any minute and he'll be angry if he finds you.'
'I dare say he will, Beauty. Especially when he hears how his lovely wife has been entertaining her fancy man while he's safely out of the way.' He put his hand on her breast and she jumped away as if his touch were poisonous.
'Get out of here – now.'
'Come on, Beauty. Don't play the shy one. The old man's not enough for you? Can't say I'm surprised. A woman like you must take a lot of satisfying.'
She wrenched her arm back and swung her open palm across his face in a stinging blow. At once his manner changed and he snarled at her.
'Think you're too good for me, do you, bitch? You didn't look so high and mighty doing the dirty with your son-in-law. Yes, I know who he is. I ran into my little sister and she told me her new husband has run off and left her. I looked at her wedding photographs while she was chucking them on the fire. When I saw you and him through the window I thought he looked familiar. You're the reason he's dumped her I suppose?'
'Leave now.'
'I'm going nowhere. I took rather a fancy to those breasts of yours when you had them out on display for him. It looked like he had his hands full. Let's have another look.' He grabbed the neck of her blouse and tore it open, sending little ivory buttons flying across the bare ground. She backed away, but tripped over the basket of laundry. Nat reached out and steadied her from falling, then jerked her towards him.
'Let me go.' She screamed at him.
'Have you talked to the old man yet? Have you got the money?'
'Not yet.' She was trembling with fear, but didn't want him to see she was afraid. 'I haven't seen him yet.'
'Liar. You've had your chance to play it the easy way and now we'll play it my way. You can give me a bit of what Pa and your fancy man have been getting and then you'll do exactly what I asked and get him to pay me what's due to me. If you don't, I'll have to tell him all about you and his son-in-law – as well as what you and me are going to do now.' He snarled out the words, spraying her face with spittle. She wiped her cheek with her hand and was overcome with a visceral anger that took over her whole body. No one's ever going to rape me again.
She struck out at his face with a blow he wasn't expecting. As he lurched backwards she grabbed the rake and held it up, using it to hold him at bay.
'Your father owes you nothing. You're bad to the core and I'll never intercede on your behalf.'
'Shut up! You can't talk to me like that! I'm an Anzac. A fucking war hero! Show some respect.' He grabbed the wooden shaft at the end of the rake and pulled her towards him with a jerk. She lost her balance and lurched forward, losing her hold on the rake. He yanked her back onto her feet, but before he could take hold of her, a familiar voice rang out.
'Leave her alone! Let her go.'
Will charged at Nat, pushing him to the ground and the two brothers wrestled on the dirt path. Elizabeth dragged herself up onto the steps. Will was in a frenzy, pummelling his brother with uncharacteristic savagery. He had the advantage of surprise and his rush upon Nat had taken the older man's breath away.
'Will, stop! Please stop! You'll kill him.' Elizabeth cried, fearing that any advantage Will had would be cancelled as soon as Nat got
on his feet again. But Will was kicking his brother's prone body and shouting.
'You bastard! Coward! How does that feel? That's what Ma felt when you kicked the lights out of her, you drunken bum.'
Nat kicked out violently with his right foot, making contact with Will's shin and throwing him off balance, then took advantage to scramble to his feet. Elizabeth saw a flash of metal in the sunlight.
'Will! Look out!' she screamed, but Nat had already lunged.
A shot rang out and Nat fell forward, landing on top of Elizabeth like a felled tree, the knife clattering from his hand onto the steps of the homestead. She lay unmoving under the weight of him, feeling the sticky warmth of his blood as it pooled from his chest over her torn blouse onto her hair and face.
Then the weight was lifted off her and she opened her eyes to see Jack Kidd standing over her. She pulled herself up and looked at the body of Nat. A rifle lay on the ground where Kidd had let it fall.
'He's stabbed Will.' She crawled on her knees to where the boy was slumped on the ground. She leaned over him and to her relief he was still breathing.
'Will! Can you hear me?'
Kidd knelt beside her and cradled his son in his arms.
'Help me carry him inside so I can see how badly hurt he is.'
He lifted Will by the armpits and Elizabeth took hold of the boy's feet and they carried him inside and laid him on their bed. She filled a basin with water while Kidd opened the boy's shirt to reveal a gaping wound in his side. She doused some cloths in water and set a kettle to boil, as Kidd tried to soak up and stem the blood that was pouring from him. Will was conscious, but weak.
Kidd spoke at last. 'It looks worse than it is.'
'He needs a doctor. You fetch him and I'll try and stop the bleeding,' she said.
'I don't think it's penetrated any organs. But he's losing a lot of blood and he could be bleeding inside.'
Will's face was white as milk and the blood was flowing freely onto the bed sheets. She gathered up the counterpane and pressed it gently over the wound. 'Go and get the doctor, Jack. Hurry!'
'I don't want to leave him.' Kidd leaned over his son and took the boy's hand.
Will's breathing was faint and Elizabeth held a damp cloth to his parched lips. 'Go and get the doctor. Hurry – he could go into shock.'
He looked at her torn blouse, her breasts half exposed and the remains of her blouse drenched in blood.
'Did he hurt you? Did he do anything to you before we got here?'
'No.'
'He tore your blouse?'
'Will arrived before he could do anything else'
'He's dead, isn't he? I killed him?'
Elizabeth nodded.
'May he burn in hell.' Kidd's eyes hardened. 'Clean yourself up, you're covered in blood and your shirt's in tatters.' He looked at her sadly. 'I should never have left you here alone.'
He went onto the porch and pushed his foot against the body of his oldest child so it rolled off the step and lay, eyes wide open, on his back. Kidd went back into the house and grabbed his oilskin jacket and threw it over the corpse.
'Take care of my boy. I'll be back as soon as I can.'
When he returned with Doctor Reilly in tow, the doctor stopped beside Nat's body, still lying in front of the veranda steps, but seeing Elizabeth in distress on the threshold, he stepped over the body and went to attend to Will, after telling Elizabeth and Kidd to wait outside.
Kidd paced up and down, while Elizabeth sat on the step-top, head in hands praying for Will's life and trying not to look at the large oilskin-covered lump in front of her.
Eventually the doctor reappeared in the doorway.
'He's lost a lot of blood but he's a strong lad. He'll live. You did a good job at staunching the bleeding, Mrs Kidd. I've cleaned the wound and stitched him up. He needs complete rest for a few days. I'll send the ambulance as I'd like to keep an eye on him in the hospital to make sure he doesn't get an infection. The stitches can come out in a couple of weeks. He'll be chopping logs and snaring rabbits again in no time.'
He turned to Kidd. 'I presume whoever's under that oilskin is no longer in need of a doctor's help?'
Kidd nodded.
'Maybe you'd better tell me what happened and let me take a look. I'll have to issue a death certificate.'
'He's carked it. I shot him.'
The doctor frowned. 'Let's have a look.' He pulled the oilskin off the body. 'This is your lad, Jack, isn't it?' The doctor's face was grim.
'Yup. It is.'
'Good God, man! What happened?'
'He got what's been coming to him for a long time.'
He reached for Elizabeth's hand and spoke quietly. 'I should have done for him years ago. He may have been my flesh and blood but he was evil to the core. Even as a small lad he was bad. Bane of his mother's life. I wore out shoe leather trying to knock sense into him, but it was never any good. The missus tried to see the good in him and always took his part, but he did for her in the end.'
His voice broke and he brushed the tears away from his eyes.
'He was only fourteen. His mother found him drinking a bottle of my whisky and took him to task. He was blind drunk and hit her so hard her eyes were black as two pieces of coal and she'd bruises all down her face.'
Elizabeth decided not to share the fact that Nat had twisted the tale to accuse him of hitting his wife. 'So you threw him out?'
'I wish I had. If I'd been around I'd have kicked him to back o'Bourke. I was in Sydney. He and the other two were here with their mother. She was eight months gone with another baby and weak with the influenza. She was tired and defenceless and he bashed the daylights out of her. Then he buggered off and left her with Hattie and Will. The bashing brought the labour on.' He turned to the doctor, 'You know this as well as I do, man.'
The doctor took up the story. 'Will ran all the way into town to fetch me but by the time we got here it was too late. She'd died just after the child was born. The baby died soon after – his skull was fractured from the kicking his mother received. Nat was gone. The police were on the lookout for him and some of the men got up a search party but there was no trace. Most people thought he was lying dead at the bottom of the canyon. If the police had caught him he'd have been arrested.'
'Prison would have been too good for him.' Kidd's voice was barely a whisper.
'I'm sorry.' She laid a hand on his arm.
The doctor coughed. 'He was a bad egg, Jack, and you've trouble enough, losing your children just a few days ago, but to shoot your own son in the back, man? The law should have dealt with him.'
'He had it coming and I'm ready to face the consequences. I'm glad I killed him before he could harm her or my boy. I'm glad I was here in time.'
'What will we tell the constable?'
'The truth.'
Elizabeth started to speak. 'You can't...'
'The police aren't fools, are they, Doc?'
'But they'll...' Elizabeth could barely speak.
'They'll charge me with murder? They probably will and if they do, it's no more than I deserve. I should have killed him years ago.'
'Get yourself back to town, doc and tell the constable I'm waiting for him.'
Chapter Twenty-Two – Arrested
Elizabeth stood on the steps as the constable led Jack Kidd away to the police truck. Nat's body had already been taken to the mortuary for the post mortem examinations. As McDonald Falls had no police cell, Kidd would be taken into the next town and held until a magistrate determined whether to charge him or not. She had little doubt of the likelihood of that.
She went back into the house and took up her place again beside Will's bed, waiting for the ambulance. The boy drifted in and out of consciousness and was clearly very weak. She held a cup of water to his parched lips to help him drink whenever he was able to accept it.
Here she was again, keeping a bedside vigil beside a sick child. This time, although the doctor's prognosis was good, her anxiety was acu
te. Her stepson, while not of her own blood, had come to feel like her own. Will had been her first real friend in this place and a true and faithful one. She had rejoiced in his growing confidence and the way he'd taken care of her own little boy and from the moment of his birth treated him as his brother.
He called out Elizabeth's name in his sleep. As she sat beside him, holding his unresponsive hand in hers, she realised he had been nursing a crush on her. It explained his attacks of blushing and the increasingly frequent tongue-tied silences in her presence. She smiled and whispered, 'Whoever wins your heart, Will Kidd, will be a very lucky woman.' He showed no signs of hearing and continued his restless sleep.
His brow was clammy so she wiped it with a damp cloth and reached again for his hand. It was harder to believe that Will and Nat had been brothers than that he and Mikey were. She shivered to think how close they had been to losing Will. But at what price? She was afraid now for Jack Kidd. She'd seen another aspect of him recently and tonight's revelations had intensified that. The loss of his first wife and the estrangement from his son had conspired to harden him. A rough and ready countryman from the start, any softer sides to his character had been brushed aside when he'd built a hard shell to present to the world. Not so different from herself? Underneath the brusque and cold exterior, was an unhappy and disappointed man, whose early struggles to keep his family fed and clothed and whose losses of successive children and then his wife, had killed any joy and capacity for happiness.
She knew she must stand by him and help him face what lay ahead. He'd killed Nat to save her life. Standing by him was the least she could do. She'd postpone joining Michael in New Zealand – she couldn't add to Kidd's suffering by abandoning him for another man, his son in law and trusted foreman to boot. Her heart ached for Michael, but Kidd needed her. Michael would understand and they could be together soon. Once this mess was sorted and Kidd out of custody, she'd find a way to break the news to him and follow Michael.
Will stirred, opened his eyes and tried to pull himself up. She put her hand on his shoulder. 'Steady on, Will. You need to rest.'
