by John Booth
“I never thought I’d be so glad you were faster than a speeding bullet,” Sal remarked.
“I’m better the second and third time around.” Peter said, more than a little hurt by her words.
Sal gave an unladylike snort. “Yeah, that would be the fighter jet and a racing car.”
“So, am I forgiven, then?”
“Never fly with that woman again.”
Peter nodded his head in agreement.
“And when you fly on your own… work on your endurance will you?”
The fight that ensued was mainly play, but if Sal hadn’t managed to lock Peter on the far side of the bathroom door she might have received far more than she bargained for.
Chapter Twenty Six
Lady Geldar
Peter walked into his office to find a female Grimm sitting behind his desk. He was so flabbergasted that it took him a few seconds to adjust. His first thought was he must have entered the wrong room and he got as far as turning to his door. The Grimm in question cackled with amusement and he recognised her as Lady Geldar, leader of the Grimms.
“Yes, this is indeed your office, Lord Cragus. Did I startle you?” Lady Geldar pushed his seat back and dropped a leather booted foot onto Peter’s desk, scuffing his papers and knocking some onto the floor.
“I confess I’m surprised to see you, Lady Geldar. To what do I owe this delightful, if unexpected, visit?” Peter prevaricated while he tried to get his bearings. It looked as if he would have to sit on the guest chair. He tried hard to look casual as he sat down. Peter didn’t want to give Lady Geldar the satisfaction of thinking she had discomforted him.
Peter took the time for a detailed look at his visitor. Female Grimms looked in every way identical to the males. Their typical clothes consisted of leather pants and boots. Both sexes had what Peter thought of as man-boobs, which is to say their chests weren’t flat, but Lady Geldar certainly looked nothing like a human female.
Yet Peter had no problems in distinguishing male and female Grimms apart. He couldn’t tell how he knew their sex, but somehow he always did. It annoyed the hell out of his analytical mind that didn’t know how he knew.
Lady Geldar frightened Peter a little. It wasn’t the fangs, the claws, or the bloodshot eyes that all Grimms possessed. It wasn’t the large leathery wings that folded back so unexpectedly neatly whenever a Grimm sat down. It wasn’t even the fact that by human standards Lady Geldar possessed a face capable of scaring a cat from over a hundred yards. It was more that she was a formidable person in her own right. Peter could feel the strength of her personality and he knew she didn’t suffer fools gladly.
“Can I do something for you, Lady Geldar?” Peter felt as if he was back in the Commandant’s study waiting to find out just how many strokes of the cane he would get. He felt a strange urge to rub his bottom, which he resisted.
“You can stop treating me like a fool, Peter Craig.” Lady Geldar said vehemently. “That is perfectly acceptable behaviour as far as the other members of the council are concerned. They are fools, after all. But it isn’t acceptable behaviour with me.”
“In what way have I given offence?” Peter asked, though he had a shrewd idea what she was complaining about.
Lady Geldar got up from Peter’s chair and her wings unfolded behind her. If she was formidable before, now she looked downright frightening. “Are we going to shadow box all day or can we talk honestly? I assure you that no word of anything you tell me will reach the other members of the Council.”
“Information must be shared in both directions, my lady. I’ll tell you some things you want to know if you’ll do the same.” Peter was astonished his voice didn’t shake as he spoke. She really was frightening when she stood like that.
Lady Geldar folded her wings and sat down again. “That’s a fair deal. A bargain is a bargain and I will keep my side if you keep yours. So tell me, Lord Cragus, why have you stopped the Council attacking Zandar?”
“Why should you want to?” Peter responded. “The Warlocks haven’t attacked us since I’ve been here.”
Lady Geldar laughed. “A question for a question and you tell me nothing. Beware, I grow weary of this. We attack the Warlocks before they can regroup. It has been this way for centuries and if we don’t attack soon, more of our families will die in their inevitable attack.”
“I’ve come up with a remarkable new stratagem,” Peter went to the drinks table. “I’m going to call it peace in the long term, but the word armistice will do for now. Can I offer you a drink, my Lady?”
“Peace with Warlocks is a false dream. It has been tried before, my young and naïve friend.” Lady Geldar laughed. “You may have already exceeded the longest peace we’ve had in a hundred years. Pour me a large drink. If that’s your best reason I might need several.”
Peter prepared the drinks and handed her a very large one as he pondered what to say. It all depended on whether Lady Geldar was willing to consider radical ideas.
“Do you believe the Warlocks are our real enemies and there can never be peace?”
Lady Geldar took a large gulp of her drink. Peter would have choked had he attempted something similar. This particular drink contained a high alcohol content and burned the throat like liquid fire. “When they came to kill my husband they looked like Warlocks. I might have noticed if I was attacked by Dragons, Humans or Vampires. Are you telling me I’m wrong?”
“Have you ever persuaded a Grimm to attack someone he liked, because it pleased you to trick him?”
“Not for three times as long as you have been alive and more. Those are foolish childish games, not worthy of an adult.”
“But you know of men and women who’ve done such things?”
“Yes it’s been known, but the Warlocks are not so naïve as to be led around by their cocks, though rumour has it a Vampire Lord suffered such indignities at the hands of his Warlock female.” Lady Geldar smiled at Peter like a fox in a hen house.
Peter’s face reddened. He knew he needed have to find a way to stop the slaves gossiping. Perhaps they would stop if he paid them for their silence.
“Would you say Han No has the ability to lead the Warlocks in such a manner?”
Lady Geldar rubbed her chin as she gave this idea her serious thought. “Why would the Dragons want us to fight?”
“How many Dragons do you think there are?”
“Damn you! This answering a question with a question is irritating, especially when they lead me to places I should have thought to look. Han No has no reasons to hate Vampires or the Grimms, let alone the Warlocks who have moved to his beck and call for centuries.”
“He has a very good reason and for over two hundred years he has led the Vampires and Grimms of Hellogon to the edge of extinction. Now he has reason to destroy the Warlocks, and we’re his only available tools.”
“You’re not going to tell me why he would want to do this, are you?” Lady Geldar asked quietly.
“I can’t. No one alive is to blame and we must put past treacheries aside if we’re to survive. I hope to change Han No’s mind, but that’s no simple task and relies on things outside my control. In the meantime, I’ve arranged a cessation of attacks with the Warlocks. It’s a delicate peace but, while it survives, so do the sentient species of Hellogon.”
He took a massive risk in telling Lady Geldar this much. If she didn’t agree, he was going to have to keep the secret within this room and that meant that she would have to die.
“Do you think you can kill me if I disagree with you?” Lady Geldar asked, her face crinkling up in what Peter was learning to interpret as smiling. He inclined his head. “I could lie to you and walk away,” Lady Geldar offered.
“No, you couldn’t. You’ll tell me what you believe because that’s the kind of person you are. If it’s against me, then we’ll fight and one of us will die.”
Lady Geldar laughed and jumped over the desk in a single fluid bound. Peter’s knife rested against her throat as he
reacted every bit as swiftly. Lady Geldar laughed even more heartily and Peter put his knife back in its sheath. He only started wearing weapons in the last few days and didn’t want to start using them by killing an ally.
Lady Geldar bowed, which was an impressive sight when you have large leather wings. “You are worthy, Lord Cragus. Perhaps more worthy than any of us deserve. I will support you and keep your secrets.”
Lady Geldar shooed Peter out of the guest chair he was in and sat on it. Peter took the hint and sat in the chair behind his desk. “Now what secrets do you want me to reveal in return, my Lord Cragus?” she asked.
“How many Grimms are left and where do you live?”
Lady Geldar laughed uproariously.
“Any of the servants could have told you that if you had but asked.” She considered for a moment before she continued, “Or perhaps it is a more astute question than I first supposed. There are more of us than might be thought, though we have been in decline for centuries. There are nearly a thousand of us on Earth. We like shop keeping and England is a nation of shopkeepers, I suspect because so many of them are Grimms. Who would notice a short fat shopkeeper anyway?”
Peter nodded. “And how many Grimms are left on Hellogon?”
“If you count people like Soluman who commute, there are exactly two thousand six hundred and thirty three of us. Most of us live in the hills. We build our nests on rocky crags. Our breeding grounds are about sixty miles from here. We don’t build castles as the Vampires do. We use caves to store things of value, or we bring them to Cragus. We prefer to live with the sky over our heads.”
“If you had an extra forty of fifty women, would it help your species all that much?” This was the real focus of Peter’s questions. Why was Solly so determined to recover a paltry number of women?
“Have you seen our children in the castle?” Lady Geldar asked, “And how many of our women have you seen in your time here?”
“Just you and no children at all,”
“There are only two hundred female Grimms alive. Of those, only one hundred are capable of bearing young. Alas, I am one of those past her time, which is why you see me here. We breed a little like cats. When we enter our fertile cycle we mate with up to a dozen males in the space of three or four days. We give each one a child that spring. I have born nearly two hundred children and seen most of them die in this war. Forty breeding female Grimms would turn our species around.” Lady Geldar looked depressed when she stopped speaking.
“I understand,” Peter said as he worked it out. A lot more of what was going on made sense now. He wondered if Solly realised Han No knew about his female Grimms and would blow his shop to little pieces if he tried to move them.
As soon as he thought of the question, he knew the answer to it. What a terrible position Solly’s in. No wonder he’s been doing all those things.
“But back to sensible matters,” Lady Geldar said as she shook the melancholy out of herself. “The Ball will take place in less than a week and I came to your office to make sure you are properly prepared for it. As Lord Cragus, you have a major part to play and your little Warlock whore is going to cause a terrible problem for us.”
“I don’t have time to go to a ball.” Peter said in astonishment. “I’m trying to save the planet and four sentient species, for God’s sake.”
“What you want and what you must do are totally different,” Lady Geldar explained in a kindly voice. “Lady Ilarna should have been here to tell you all this, but the girl won’t go near you since you skupped her the other day. You should have been gentle. Males will insist on trying out all the human perversions. I suppose in your case you have some excuse as you were brought up by those savages.”
“There are formal dances you must lead and toasts you must give. If you don’t give the toasts perfectly, you will be deposed. This ball is massively important to the Vampires.”
“It is also the event at which the Grimms and Vampires renew their oaths of loyalty. So no more protests from you, young man. You are going to go to the ball and you must get it exactly right.”
Peter put his head in his hands in horror. “Oh God.” were the only words he could find.
Chapter Twenty Seven
Preparations
By the end of the day, Peter’s worst fears about the Vampire Ball were confirmed. He never enjoyed formal events and his experience at Jeremy’s party hadn’t helped. This was the most formal ball it was possible to imagine and his life rested on getting things absolutely right.
Lady Geldar ordered one of the slaves to escort Sal to Peter’s office. She entered apprehensively with Mary in tow. Lady Geldar explained formal dancing was an essential part of the ball and Lord Cragus and his partner would be expected to lead for many of the dances.
“The only dancing I’ve ever done is swaying to dance music.” Sal said.
“I’ve avoided learning to dance all my life.” Peter smiled at Sal. “Done a pretty good job of it too.”
This was not a good start and it got worse as Lady Geldar tried to teach the two of them to dance.
“I have never seen people with four left feet before!” she complained bitterly. “Have you no sense of rhythm?”
“No one’s ever complained about my sense of rhythm before,” Sal snapped back, her anger increased by Peter standing on both her big toes. Even he wasn’t quite sure how he had achieved this.
“Well, perhaps instead of dancing you could take your partner horizontally for the benefit and delectation of all the Vampires?” Lady Geldar suggested menacingly and Sal stepped back looking cowed. Peter suspected that if Lady Geldar was as frightening when fighting as she was teaching people to dance, then all her enemies had probably run away.
Soon Peter and Sal were reduced to hobbling around the room cursing each other. Lady Geldar gave up and called in the slaves to measure Peter and Sal for their costumes. Sal insisted, much to Lady Geldar’s disgust, that Mary should make her dress. The Ball was a costumed affair where every Vampire tried to outdo the rest with their extravagance and style.
From the description Lady Geldar gave them, Peter got the impression that black wedding dresses summed up the women’s clothes, while for the men it would be black and purple silk suits decorated with sequins and topped by black cloaks and swords. It all sounded silly to him.
He managed to get away to find Lady Ilarna when Sal told Lady Geldar she had something to do and vanished out of the door like a schoolgirl late for a lesson. She’d been doing that a lot lately and Peter still had no idea where she was going. There weren’t many places a female Warlock would be welcome in Castle Cragus and he was intrigued trying to figure out what she was up to.
It took Peter over an hour to find Ilarna and, when he did, she stood at the far end of a corridor. He shouted to her and she turned on hearing her name. As soon as she saw it was Peter, she ran away.
Lady Geldar had been right when she suggested Ilarna was avoiding him. Catching her was going to be tricky, as she knew the castle better than he did and the slaves were on her side.
* * *
That first day was much the pattern for the days that followed. Peter and Sal were cornered by Lady Geldar first thing each morning. She would spend an hour or two cursing their inability to follow her commands. Peter found his own clumsiness a mystery and believed Sal must be putting him off. Dancing and martial arts were similar skills and he should have been able to master dance steps easily. But as soon as he put his hands on Sal’s waist he became a complete klutz.
After dancing practice, Sal would excuse herself saying she had an urgent appointment and Peter stayed to learn another set of toasts. The ball was a unification event for the Vampires. They toasted clans that were long gone. It was Peter’s duty to lead every toast and there had been hundreds of clans.
Each Lord represented a dozen or more clans. Their job was to maintain the honour of the clans and woe betides the Lord Cragus who named one incorrectly or, worse still, forgot abou
t one. Using notes would be seen as an insult. Peter needed to recall all the clan names from memory or he wouldn’t be Lord Cragus by the end of the night.
If that wasn’t bad enough, the ball was also the occasion when the Grimms and the Vampires reaffirmed their allegiance. The rituals involved were complex, and Peter was expected to know and intone them as though he had spent his life seeing them enacted.
If Peter had grown up on Hellogon they would all be second nature because, as an heir to the Cragus line, he would have attended the ball from childhood. As it was, there was a massive amount to learn and it took up all his free time.
Every day a group of slaves worked on fitting his costume. Each fitting involved a large number of pins being fastened to the half constructed suit and a great number of these pins seemed to end up sticking into him.
Lady Geldar let him out from time to time and he would rush around looking for Ilarna. He wanted to sort out the situation between them as he needed his Castlemaine. One thing soon became obvious to him. When Sal disappeared, Ilarna was missing as well.
Peter had a inspiration when he realised Sal’s disappearances corresponded with the times Lord Drogwar lectured his students. A quick sortie to observe the class through a window confirmed his suspicion. Both women were attending the course. They sat at diagonal ends of the room and studiously avoided looking at each other.
Peter decided to lay in wait for Ilarna and catch her at the end of the class. If Ilarna avoided Sal, she would have to take the back stairs and this was where Peter waited. As Peter anticipated, the other students walked down the hallway while Ilarna headed to where he hid in the shadow of the spiral staircase. He stepped up behind Ilarna as she put her foot on the first step.
