When her fingers begin to fumble with the elastic on my joggers, I clench my eyes shut. I can feel her nervousness, her vulnerability, and although I’m going to be mindful of it, I can’t help but be more turned on. I grit my teeth as the soft cotton slides over my thighs and down my legs, Amelia following as she gently drops to her knees on the floor.
She looks up at me, her round hazel eyes with emerald flecks, and dark lashes, blinking up at me with little hesitation. So much want, yet there is fear there too. It’s only slight, but it is there.
“Baby, as much as I want to feel your lips wrapped around my cock, I want to feel you more.”
She slowly stands, and I waste no time in pushing her tiny shorts down her legs, letting them drop to the floor. There’s a sharp intake of breath before she steps out of them, pressing closer to me.
“Now, I’m not in the best shape, so, baby, you’re gonna have to be on top,” I tell her, sitting down on the sofa, wincing at the pinch in my side.
“I can do that,” she breathes out, straddling my lap.
“Are you sure this is what you want?” I ask, running my fingers through her hair and bringing her lips down to mine.
She moans through the kiss, and when she pulls back, she’s breathless, her hips rocking gently against me. “I want this more than anything. I want you. But, Maddox, I’ve only ever been with—”
“I love you,” I assure her, kissing her once more. I deepen the kiss, and tingles shoot down my spine at the sensation. She’s everything.
Everything I didn’t know I wanted or needed.
“I love you too.”
“Then trust me to take care of you,” I tell her.
Her pupils dilate as she continues to rock over my cock. I can already feel how wet she is, and it’s making me want to fuck her hard, but for now, she needs slow, gentle. I need slow and gentle. And not because of my injuries, but because she deserves to be made love to.
“Condom,” she whispers.
“Jacket behind you,” I reply hoarsely. When she bends backwards, pushing her pussy over my cock, I grit my teeth. “Fuck!”
Yeah, once I’m at full strength, I’m going to fuck the hell out of my girl.
She comes back up, condom in hand, with a sly little smile on her lips. She tears it open and I lean back, watching as she rolls it over my cock.
Her hands shake, and hesitantly, she leans forward. The minute her lips reach mine, that sensation in the pit of my stomach intensifies.
I have missed out on so much. Before, I felt like I had my pick of women, each one unique in their own way because it was different. But kissing her, feeling her flush against me… this is what it means to be kissed.
Now it feels like the others were in search of this.
For this moment.
For this girl.
And to make sure this is real, I keep my eyelids half open, scared this is a figment of my imagination and I’ll wake up at home in bed with some faceless chick.
Her warm breath fans across my face when she pulls back, and wordlessly, I reach between us, lining my cock up at her entrance.
Feeling the tip, she torturously slides down, her eyes half closed, and her lips parted. My jaw aches from clenching so tightly. I want to grab her, to thrust myself inside her so hard, but this isn’t about that.
It isn’t really about sex.
It’s about her.
Connecting with her.
Loving her.
I pull her towards me, one hand on her hip to help keep up the rhythm as she thrusts up and down, her movements slow, steady.
Heat rises from my groin to my chest as I stare into her hypnotic eyes, a wave of warmth hitting me.
Her skin feels smooth under my fingertips as I caress her hip. I watch her lips part as I reach between her legs, swirling my thumb around her clit.
“Maddox,” she whispers, sweat glistening over her chest. She leans down, claiming my mouth once more, and the fire that erupts between us is explosive.
Her fingers explore my chest, rising up until they are resting on my shoulders, her nails digging into the skin.
I can feel my orgasm building. Just being inside her, finally being with her… it’s an exquisite torture.
She pulls back, breathing heavily. Her tits bounce with each thrust, and I lean forward, kissing up her breastbone, licking the sweat off her skin.
She cries out as I press my thumb down on her clit harder, and I pull back to watch her expression.
The intensity shining back at me nearly undoes me. Our noses touch as she jerkily pushes down on me. Her pussy clenches around me, and I know she’s close.
A light sound escapes her lips as she drops down, her arse cheeks slapping against my thighs with each bounce. The sound of her throaty moans accompanying the slapping of our skin has me gritting my teeth. I’m not sure how much longer I can hold off.
When her orgasm hits her, I explode, my fingers tightening on her hips as I slam her down on my dick. I groan as she cries out, collapsing against me.
Heavy panting fills the air for a moment, before Amelia leans back, gazing down at me. “That was…” she pauses, shaking her head. “Wow. It really can be like it is in the books.”
“Baby, I’m better than the books,” I tell her, grinning.
I manoeuvre us so we’re lying down on the couch, facing each other. I grimace as I turn to pull the blanket off the back of the sofa, and take a moment to breathe through the pain.
Amelia runs her finger down my chest, content on just being there. “How are you doing?”
She lets out a dry chuckle. “Considering my son got kidnapped, the man I love got stabbed, and my ex best friend turned up on my doorstep, I’m surprisingly doing okay now.”
“It was the great sex,” I tease. “I told you I can do magic with my cock.”
She shrugs, her lips twisting into a sly smile. “It was okay. I wouldn’t say it was magical.”
I chuckle. “Babe, it was out of this world,” I state, before asking, “What about the old best friend? I hope you told her you have a replacement friend now.”
She giggles under her breath. “I told her where to go.”
“You’re okay though? I don’t have to set the females in my family after her?”
She leans back, tilting her head to look up at me. “No. Because seeing her made me realise something.”
“Realise what?” I ask quietly.
Her lashes fan across her cheeks briefly before she blinks them open, her voice low, soothing, when she replies, “That life goes on. That everything changes, and it can be for the better. I spent years taking Cameron back because I wanted us to be a family, because I was scared of what I’d become without him. He was all I knew and felt I had. And it hit me today. I’m so much better off without him. I always was. But now I know I don’t need him. I don’t need to be scared of being alone because I was never really alone. I have two beautiful children who I couldn’t possibly love more. Everything outside of them is a bonus. I have great friends, an amazing family, and a man who doesn’t take social cues very well.”
“You couldn’t have gone with ruggedly handsome, has a big dick, and is great in bed?” I ask, feigning hurt.
Her body shakes against mine. “You kind of forced yourself into my life, and it was the best thing to ever happen to me. You opened my world up to better things. To brighter things. There was laughter in my life again. Love. Friendship,” she states, before her lashes flutter again. “I’m so sorry for the way I overreacted that night. I was overwhelmed, and I let fear fuel the negativity running through my mind. I still feel stupid whenever I think back on that night. I thought I lost you.”
“Never. I’m like glitter. Once you take me out, you’ll never get rid of me. No matter what you do, I’ll keep turning up.”
She chuckles. “Um, thanks?” she mumbles. “I bet you thought I was a right lunatic.”
I stroke my hand over her face, clearing it of the loose strands of her
hair getting in the way. “No, what I thought was that the girl I had fallen madly in love with was just torn away from her first date with a guy, only to have her best friend blurt out that he liked her. What I was thinking was that this girl didn’t deserve to have it done that way after everything she had been through.”
Her scrutinising is kind of unnerving. “Your dad told you how you fucked up, didn’t he?”
I groan with a nod, but quickly rush to explain. “In my defence, I’ve only ever had flings. I had been avoiding finding ‘the one’ for so long that it spooked me. I freaked out, and I knew I had to do everything to win you. My dad always said it would come at me hard and then backfire. And it did.”
“I’m not a prize,” she whispers.
I glance down at her, my gaze softening. “Amelia, you’re the prize worth having. You aren’t some cheap teddy at the fun fair. You’re the prize. The one you’ll do anything or pay anything to have.”
Her brows scrunch together. “I’m not sure using the terminology to pay for me is romantic. I think.”
My chuckle is mixed in with a groan as I drop my forehead against hers. “What I’m trying to say is that you’re worth more than anything money could buy. Having you; you being mine…” I take a deep breath. “It’s more than I deserve.”
“I love you, Maddox,” she croaks out, pressing her lips to mine briefly.
“I love you too,” I reply, feeling my chest fill with warmth. “Now, as much as I’m enjoying you being in my arms, can we take this to your room?”
She sits up, taking the blanket with her. “Oh my God, your side. I forgot. Are you okay?”
I place my hand over hers when she goes to pull the blanket off my torso. “It’s fine. It’s uncomfortable, but I just want to lie in a bed with you and sleep for like a week.”
She smiles down at me in amusement. “Jasmine is in there. I put Asher back in his cot when I heard the door knock.”
I grit my teeth as I sit up, before reaching for her. “You couldn’t sleep without them?”
Her lips tip down. “No. I just—”
“I understand,” I interrupt. “You sleep in the middle, and tonight I’ll have both my girls with me. At least then I’ll know you’re all safe.”
“Thank you,” she tells me, resting her forehead against mine.
I lift her chin up with my knuckles, my lips brushing against hers. “You’ll never have to worry about that happening ever again. I’m not going anywhere,” I tell her, hearing the conviction in my voice. “And they might not be my kids, but they’re still mine. I feel it in my heart. I’ve missed them just as much as I’ve missed you.”
“They’ve missed you too. They’ve been such grumps without you.”
I smirk, pressing my lips against hers. “Then let’s go to bed and not waste another moment.”
Her breath hitches, her eyes watering. “I’d love nothing more.”
I move as quickly as I can, since the local anaesthetic is wearing off, and get dressed. Once I’m done, I take Amelia’s hand in mine, leading her upstairs.
When we reach her room, my heart begins to hammer inside my chest. Jasmine is sprawled out on her bed, safe, and fast asleep. Relief hits me so hard I nearly stagger my way to the cot.
I need to see him.
I grip the bar of the cot as I stare down at Asher sleeping soundlessly. He’s okay. He truly is okay. I sag against the cot, staring at him for a moment longer.
I run my finger down his cheek, the knot inside my chest finally loosening. He really is okay.
This is what I want.
All of it.
Amelia, Jasmine and Asher.
And although I’m kicking myself for not giving in to my urges sooner, I know it happened for a reason.
They are my world.
It’s a life lesson that love isn’t meant to be messed around with. It isn’t something that comes easily, not when it’s true love. Not when it’s ‘the one’. If I had made a move on Amelia sooner, we might not be where we are today. I needed to know what it was like to lose her before I had her.
And no matter what life throws at me now, what bad choices I make in the future, I’ll always have this.
Because love isn’t to be taken for granted.
It’s meant to be treasured.
Amelia and the kids have no idea what’s to come. They have never been loved by a Carter.
But they are about to be.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
AMELIA
The chaotic chatter echoes in my ears as I try to tune it out and escape into my own mind. I don’t want to think about where I am, what I’m doing. It will become a reality soon, and I’m not sure I’m ready for that.
For two weeks I have been determined and sure, and yet, the time I began to second guess this decision was today.
I’m outside, staring at the ominous building whilst the rain pours down around me. The weather seems fitting considering where I am. Like a bad omen, telling me this is a bad idea.
Or maybe it isn’t.
All I know is, I have to do this.
The last couple of weeks have been proof of that. Being with Maddox has turned my life upside down in the best possible way. It’s bliss. It’s right. And he just fits. There is no adjustment period, no getting-to-know-you stage. It just is. And I couldn’t be happier. In fact, I didn’t know this level of happiness existed until now. It’s never been like this before. I feel complete, like I’m finally who I was always meant to be. I have everything I have always wanted.
And thanks to my mum and aunt, my debts are cleared, leaving me nothing to stress about. I can pay in my own time and the right amount. It’s a relief.
I also feel healthier than I have in a long time. Before I fell pregnant with Asher, I had been under weight. I skipped meals because of work, and grabbed snacks or a piece of fruit on the go. After Asher, I kept my weight on, but with Maddox’s sex drive, it’s slowly going. Though my figure has stayed. He’ll turn up in the day and palm the kids off to either his mum or mine, just so we can spend hours in bed. I can’t complain because I love those moments. I love the times we’re alone and it’s just us. Because I feel like more than a mum in those moments. I feel like me.
And I’m happy.
However, as blissful as life has been, I need to do this today. At first, Maddox wasn’t happy, especially when I told him I was going in alone. But in the end, he understood. Or if he didn’t, he pretended to. And I love him for it.
I need to see Cameron, to tell him this violent cycle needs to end because it can’t go on anymore. We aren’t on the merry-go-round. Me and the kids are on a new ride, a new path, and it doesn’t include him or his family becoming an obstacle and causing havoc.
It was Scarlett who made me realise it’s what I need to do. Since that dreadful night he attacked us, I had wondered why she did it. I never understood how someone who was such a close part of my life could hurt me the way she did. Until she turned up on my doorstep, I didn’t realise how badly I needed the closure.
And it wasn’t really about the reasons why.
It wasn’t about the ‘how could she’.
It was about letting go of the toxic in my life and knowing I had the strength and courage to do it.
Because no matter how many questions I had for her, no matter what answers she gave me, the fact remains the same. She won’t change. She hasn’t changed. And it was a slap in the face when I realised Cameron won’t change either. He will do his sentence and come out the same man. Be the same person. If he hides those characteristics after his sentence, he’s lying to himself.
But I’d also be lying to myself if I said I didn’t want to go in there and face him. I’d be letting my kids down by not doing this for them. I’d let myself down.
He needs to know I’m not the same person. And not because I’ve changed. It’s because I’ve finally opened my eyes and my heart to new things. I’m no longer afraid of letting others in, no longer scared of what
they’ll think.
“You can go in,” the prison guard announces, his deep voice startling me out of my thoughts.
I hesitantly take a step into the room. Rows and rows of tables are lined up in a cafeteria-like room, each inmate wearing grey joggers and a grey jumper, all with ‘inmate’ printed in bright orange on the back.
I try not to meet the gazes of the other men sitting on the other side of the tables, as I make my way down to row C. I scan the aisle until my eyes land on Cameron, my heart stuttering at the sight of him.
He hasn’t shaved or cut his hair. He looks frail, thinner than I remember, and a lot less intimidating.
His eyes narrow into slits when they spot me, and I inhale deeply before exhaling, making my way down.
I pull out the chair opposite him, grateful for the table separating us. He doesn’t take his eyes off me, and a shiver races down my spine.
“What are you doing here, Amelia?” he asks, his voice raspy.
“I came to tell you it ends today. All of it. I don’t want your family coming after my kids again, knocking on my door or hurting us. I don’t want you coming out of here and trying to find us. If you have any feelings towards Jasmine, you’ll do this for her,” I tell him, unable to keep the plea out of my tone.
He stares at me unnervingly for a moment, before he lets out a tired breath. “Devon told me what they did. I never asked them to do that, for what it’s worth.”
I shrug. “It doesn’t matter. We are finally in a good place.”
His jaw clenches. “What? Is the prison not good enough for you?”
“W-what?”
“You come in here and demand shit from me, as always. Never asking me what I want. You put me here, Amelia. You.”
“You put yourself here,” I retort, before cutting off the rest of what I was going to say. I didn’t come here for this.
He leans back in his chair, the metal feet scraping across the marble floor. “No. You did. I never wanted to be a dad. I never wanted to be a stay-at-home bitch.”
“W-what?” I repeat, unable to process what he’s saying or how this got so off track. “But y-you… you fought to stay whenever I broke things off.”
Maddox Page 33
