by Eden Summers
“I’m right beside you, if you hadn’t noticed,” she whispered, barely moving her lips.
He leaned down and placed a kiss below her ear. “It’s a rite of passage, sweetheart. Just go with it.”
When he pulled back, she had one brow raised, and her shoulders were straight, ready to take the room head on.
“I don’t blame you, girlfriend,” Kate continued. “Now that you’ve finally experienced what the hype is about, I doubt you’ll continue with your celibacy.”
“Oh, Christ.” Alana murmured, dropping his hand. “I need a drink.” She stepped around him, her arms outstretched at her sides as she maneuvered and bumped around furniture.
Mitch stared at her retreating form, at the beautiful long hair cascading down her back and the way her hips swayed. A knot formed in his chest, and he fought the urge to rub his sternum. Kate was right. He didn’t know why he hadn’t thought of it earlier…probably because his cock had taken over his life. Alana hadn’t experienced the pleasure sex provided before. He remembered what he’d been like as a teenager. Once he’d popped his cherry, he went around trying to pop everyone else’s. It was a new, exciting experience.
Something she would want to experiment with.
Something she wouldn’t want to wait around for.
Something Alana shouldn’t have to wait around for.
He exhaled slowly, hoping to alleviate the pressure under his ribcage. He couldn’t ask her to put her life on hold while he did the new album promo. Or the upcoming tour for that matter.
Who was he kidding? His lifestyle didn’t come with a happily ever after package. Ryan and Julie were proof.
Mitch continued to watch as Alana took a glass of white wine from Leah and proceeded to scull the contents. He ignored the slide of a chair against the tile floor and didn’t turn his gaze away from her until Blake nudged his shoulder.
“What’s wrong?”
Mitch glowered and shook his head. He didn’t want to talk about it. He didn’t even want to contemplate what would happen when they left tomorrow.
“Alana seems like a top chick. Have you made plans for what will happen once we leave?”
Blake read him like a book.
“We’re only having a bit of fun,” Mitch lied. It was more than fun. More than passion. More than addiction. Alana was under his skin, and he didn’t want to let her go.
Blake gave a derisive snort. “Oh, OK. So you won’t mind me trying to have a bit of fun with her too?”
Mitch turned to the smug expression on his friends face. Blake was trying to push him into admitting how he felt about Alana, but Mitch wasn’t that gullible. Not when the likelihood of them having a future was slim to none. He enjoyed humiliation as much as the next person.
He turned away, focusing his attention back on Alana and the way she spoke softly with the other females in the kitchen.
“Tell her how you feel,” Blake murmured. “I’ve never seen you like this over a woman before. Don’t let her go. She seems like a keeper.”
Mitch smoothed his hands over his face, rubbing away the tension. Although his career didn’t allow for it, he felt the…yearning sounded too sissy, but something similar told him it was time to settle down. The thought of coming home from months on tour, to a wife and family seemed like a fantasy always out of reach.
He could see himself with Alana. He’d never contemplated a future with anyone else before, yet it came easily with her. With vivid clarity, he pictured how stunning she would look in white, the gleam in her eyes as he carried her over the threshold, and the way she would nurse a child.
Shaking his head, he ground his teeth together. She might be the perfect image for his future, but the timing couldn’t be worse. Her life had just begun. She still wouldn’t be able to fully grasp the opportunities the world had to offer—or the men who would eagerly fall at her feet.
“It isn’t that simple.” He wished it was. God, how he wished. If he had a normal life and a normal career, things might work out. But he didn’t. His life was on the road, over numerous countries, and in and out of recording studios and rehearsal sessions.
“Love never is.” Blake patted him on the shoulder and walked away, heading for the ladies in the kitchen. Mitch followed, ignoring the bite of jealousy when his friend spoke to Alana and brought a beaming smile to her face.
No. Things between them would be too complicated. Exactly the type of scenario both of them didn’t need right now. The best he could hope for was a little more time spent with her in his arms and an amicable farewell.
* * *
Two hours later Alana sat on the balcony of the hotel suite with another glass of wine in her hand. She couldn’t remember how many she’d had, but her cheeks flushed with intoxication and her heart now beat in a slow waltz instead of the thunderous staccato she’d experienced for the last few days.
Since leaving the bedroom, she’d only spoken a few words to Mitchell, and her mind enjoyed the relief from the constant barrage of lust and love-filled thoughts. She’d also given up on trying to talk herself out of loving him. It took too much strength. They fit together too well. They meshed perfectly.
“Is everything all right between you and Mitch?”
Alana lifted her gaze from the glass in her hand to Leah’s darkened face. The woman’s voice held a hint of concern. “Yeah…I guess so. Why?”
Leah looked away. “No real reason, I suppose. He just seems down.”
Alana watched the glint of a wine glass raise to Leah’s lips before it descended again.
“Earlier, when you both...ah...came out of the bedroom, he was happy. More happy and carefree than normal. But over the last few hours, every time I go into the kitchen, he’s sullen and detached.”
Alana took a sip of her drink and squinted toward the side of Leah’s face, trying to sharpen the darkened image. The inability to read people’s expressions drove her crazy. She’d had to learn to concentrate more closely on the emotion in their voice.
“Do you want me to speak to him?” She felt stupid asking the question to someone who knew Mitchell better than she did.
“No.” Leah shook her head. “It’s probably nothing. I just get edgy when the guys aren’t themselves, especially when we’re about to go on the road.”
Ryan’s wife, Julie, let out a burst of laughter and they both turned in her direction. Kate’s soft chuckle came next from further along the balcony.
“Wow,” Leah whispered. “I can’t remember the last time she laughed. Hell, I can’t remember the last time she smiled.”
“Really?” Alana had only been able to make out the vague details of a tall slim woman with blond hair. Julie had been quiet since their introduction. “I assumed she must be upset about Ryan leaving to go on the promo tour.”
Leah laughed without humor. “No. She prefers when he’s away. Over the last year they’ve done nothing but fight.”
“Oh.” Alana had nothing else to say. Ryan seemed like a nice guy. A damn attractive, wealthy, and talented, nice guy.
“Come on.” Leah rose from her chair and held out a hand in front of Alana’s face. “Let’s go inside and chat it up with my boys. Maybe Mitch will cheer up when you’re around.”
The staccato flutter came back to life under her ribs. The mere thought of being near him sent her blood racing. “Sounds good.” She gripped her now empty wine glass in one hand and allowed Leah to help her up with the other.
Half an hour later, she understood what Leah had meant about Mitchell. Alana didn’t need her sight to notice the difference in him. He was distant even though they now sat side by side on the sofa. He still touched her, still kissed her cheek with affection and spoke to her often, yet each time he did, he lacked his usual enthusiasm, as if his heart was no longer fully involved.
Maybe the mood change stemmed from the pressure of their upcoming album release and the nights he would spend away on the promo tour. She didn’t know him well enough to judge. She wished she di
d though.
“What are you doing before you leave tomorrow?” She nestled her head into his shoulder and snuggled close. They hadn’t discussed anything beyond tonight and her heart grew more demanding, needing to determine if they would spend more time together before he left.
“I’ve got promotional obligations for most of the day.”
Her chest clenched and she nodded to distract herself from the disappointment.
He slid his arm around her shoulder and pulled her a little closer. “Late morning we’re doing a pre-recording for an interview on the Daybreak breakfast show. Mason refuses to show up to anything before eleven, so we have to tape it tomorrow for the following day’s show.”
She turned her head to look at him and raised a brow.
He shrugged. “When you’ve got as much money and pulling-power as the all famous Mason Lynch, you can kinda make whatever demands you want. Then in the afternoon we’ll visit the local drug and alcohol rehab center.”
“Really?” Every day, almost every hour, he had her in awe at how different he was from her mother’s portrayal of men. Pride melted her heart.
“It’s something we try to do often. Especially since the near miss with the fan OD’ing. We like to show our support and reiterate that Reckless Beat doesn’t condone the misuse of alcohol or the use of illegal drugs.”
No, this man definitely wasn’t what her mother described.
“Don’t look at me like that,” he chuckled.
Alana focused on the bright white of his smile and frowned. He read her so well already.
“It’s mainly about exposure and to get the haters off our backs. The ones who think we encourage kids to take drugs.” The smile faded, and the shadows from the light behind him made it hard for her to read his expression. “I enjoy it though. It puts things into perspective. And if spending a few hours with people who are doing it tough is all it takes to ease the shit in their life, even for a little while, then I’m happy to do it.”
“You’re a wonderful man, Mitchell.” She turned further into him and placed a kiss on his cheek.
He grasped the back of her head and held her close, their lips barely an inch apart. “I love how you say my name.”
“And I love saying it.” She placed another soft kiss on his lips. “You’ve opened my eyes and changed my life, in only a few days. I can’t thank you enough for that. I can only imagine what you do for others.”
He didn’t respond with his usual passion. The burst of lust didn’t hit. Instead, he stroked a hand through her hair and let out a heavy sigh. “You’re special, Allie.”
Her stomach dropped, not at his words, but at the resigned tone.
“Tell me what’s wrong,” she pleaded, cupping his cheek with her palm.
“Nothing, sweetheart.” He tilted his head into her hand. “Just tired I suppose.”
It was more than lack of sleep. He was shutting her out and she didn’t know why.
“Do you want me to go? Kate and I can call a cab.”
“No.”
She inhaled slowly. Deeply. At least his tone held a comforting fortitude. If it wasn’t for his somber mood, she might actually believe him.
“What are your plans for tomorrow?”
She frowned at the change in subject, but let it slide. “I need to go back to the optometrist for a check-up.”
“Shit. I completely forgot.”
“It’s OK. My sight is getting better, and Kate has the day off work, so I’ll be fine to get there.” She rubbed his chest to soothe the tension radiating from him. “I also want to determine if living in Richmond for a few months is feasible...and I plan on calling the Bowens and meeting up with them again. My mom has been the only family I’ve ever known, and I need to find out if I really am related to these people. I wouldn’t forgive myself if I walked away not truly knowing if they were telling the truth.”
His posture stiffened. “When do you plan on seeing them? You shouldn’t go alone.”
“I’ll be fine. Truly. I’m not going to do anything stupid.”
The tension in his body relaxed slightly, and she continued to sooth him with light strokes of her fingers down his chest.
“Plan it around lunch time. I’ll try and get out of the breakfast show gig as soon as possible and come with you.”
Her hand paused, emotion freezing her movements. His sincerity and concern touched her more than she thought a man’s interest ever would. “You don’t need to do that.”
“Please, Allie.” He squeezed her tight. “Let me do this one last thing for you before I leave.”
The reminder of his departure dried her throat to the point of pain. She cringed at the things he could learn about her from the meeting with the Bowen’s. Although she hadn’t hidden anything from Mitchell, she didn’t like announcing to the world that her life was forged from heinous adversity.
“Promise me you won’t go without me.” He lifted her chin and peered down at her.
She nodded, swallowed.
“OK.” He brushed his lips against hers. “Let’s go to bed. I want to make love to you this time.” He ran his fingers through her hair and held her in place. “I want to take my time. I want to taste you, savor you, and have you fall asleep in my arms.”
Alana blinked away the burn of forming tears. Although he hadn’t said it, she still heard, for the last time at the end of his declaration.
Mitch grabbed Alana’s hand as she stood.
“We’re going to call it a night,” he announced to his friends.
Leah left over an hour ago, heading to her hotel room a few floors down to get an early night. Kate did the same, choosing to sleep on Leah’s sofa instead of in the crowded suite. And Julie still sat outside on the balcony, anti-social as always.
Blake and Mason raised their gazes from the dining table, both with knowing grins. Blake opened his mouth, then closed it again, the jovial expression fading from his face. Mason followed suit. These men were like his brothers, closer in fact. They could see the pain he endured over needing to let Alana go. It clawed at his chest, made his palms sweat. Their time together hadn’t been long, yet his body was preparing to sink into a drug-like withdrawal at the thought of leaving her.
Sean didn’t raise his focus from the poker cards in his hand. “Have fun. Be safe. Just keep the vocals to a minimum, I’ve got sensitive ears.”
Ryan sniggered, placing two of his cards on the pile in the middle of the table and grabbing two more. “What he said.”
Blake frowned at him, his head tilting in an unspoken question. When Mitch didn’t respond, Blake pushed from the table and made his way to them. “Night, Alana.” He gave her a one-armed cuddle around the shoulders, while his gaze focused on Mitch. “Can I have a word with the priest before you two go and do your thing?” His toned lacked humor.
She replied with a soft nod of her head. “Sure.” She reached on tiptoes and placed a kiss on Mitch’s cheek. “I’m going to go brush my teeth.”
He let her fingers slide from his grasp and winced at the thought of doing it for good in the near future. He stared at Blake, both of them silent and unmoving until Alana left the room and the bedroom door shut with a soft click.
“You’d be stupid to let her go.”
Mitch raised a brow. “You’d be stupid to give an opinion on matters you know nothing about.” He didn’t mean to be a jerk. Blake was only trying to look out for him. Mitch was just sick to death of the knot that had formed in his chest. A knot that grew and strengthened every time he thought about letting go of the woman he was falling for.
Blake’s gaze bore into him, reading his thoughts, making him ache more with his blatant sympathy. “When was the last time you wanted to be with a woman for more than one night?”
Mitch scoffed and ran a hand through his hair.
“Getting her number and telling her you’ll call isn’t a lifetime commitment. It’s an opportunity. If you cut yourself off before you even take a chance, you’re a fu
cking idiot. And I may be stupid to give my opinion, because I don’t know what her deal is, but you’re a chicken shit if you let her walk away.”
“You don’t know shit.” Mitch turned his back and stepped away. Blake didn’t have a clue about her life or lack of it. He didn’t know she was starting from scratch. That she didn’t have time to wait around for a guy who would only be in her life for chunks at a time. She needed someone constant. Someone to give her the attention she deserved.
Blake grabbed his shoulder and tugged him back.
It may have been anger, the few beers he’d consumed, or the need to get back to Alana in a hurry, but something threw him off balance and he stumbled, slamming into the wall with a thud.
“Oh, shit.” Mason swore from the table and three chairs scraped across the tile.
He righted himself and glared at Blake, not because of the shove, not because his friend was still trying to prove a point, but because there was now an unnecessary scene that was stopping him from being with Alana.
“What?” He raised his voice at Blake. “What the fuck do you want from me?”
Blake put his hands up in surrender and stepped back. “I’m sorry, bro. I didn’t realize you’d had so much to drink. I’ll speak to you in the morning.”
“No. You won’t,” Mitch snapped. He’d gone through it over and over again. They weren’t right for each other. Different lives. Different upbringings. Different futures. She needed a man who wouldn’t stuff her around. A man who would be there to love her twenty–four–seven.
Sean stepped between them and turned to Mitch. “Back off.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” His blood boiled. “Blake’s the one playing Dr. Phil or some shit, and you’re telling me to back off? I don’t have time for this. I’m going to bed.”
When he turned around, Alana was there, half her body outside the doorframe, her eyes shining with emotion, her brow troubled.
He closed his eyes for a moment, took a deep breath and walked toward her. Once they were both in the room, he slammed the door shut behind them, blocking out the rest of the world. He wanted to comfort her, to apologize for placing the worried frown on her face, but he was too emotional.
