by t. h. snyder
© 2015 t. h. snyder (Tiffany Snyder)
Published by t. h. snyder
First published in 2015. All rights reserved. This book is copyright. Apart from the fair purpose of private study, research or review as permitted by the Copyright Act, no part may be reproduced without written permission.
This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual, locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Image Copyrights
Cover Artist Cassy Roop, Pink Ink Designs
Photographer Cassy Roop, Pink Ink Designs
Model CJ
I want to THANK the following people for their SUPPORT and ENCOURAGEMENT throughout this journey.
My READERS, I wouldn’t be here without you. Thank you for sharing in my stories and allowing your minds to live in the lives of my characters. I love receiving your words of encouragement and telling how much you love the craziness that runs rapid through my head.
Those AMAZING Indie Authors out there that INSPIRED me to do something I never thought was possible. You showed me that with a little motivation and imagination anything is possible.
My PINK CREW…I really don’t know what I would have done without the two of you ladies by my side. Throughout this entire story you pushed my limits, made me step outside of my comfort zone and made me believe that anything is possible. I love you girls more than you’ll ever know. You are BOTH my right hand chicks Carrie Moore and Ashley Lighthizer #BBDDOA4Ever.
My two very BEST FRIENDS. When times get rough and I want to bang my head against the wall (don’t laugh, true story), I can always count on my girls. Love you both long time Skye Turner and JM Witt #OverAnalyzeThisGirls.
The SUPER AMAZING, Cassy Roop, who captured an incredible image and made it come to life. I love you so much Sis!
Even though this lady makes me question my sanity, she knows how and when to test my limits. Thank you Missy Borucki for being my editor, you are truly AWESOME.
My eyes…thank you Monica Cervantes for once again proofing my story. You are simply WONDERFUL and I appreciate everything you do.
My family! You guys CHEER me on every day telling me how PROUD you are of my ACCOMPLISHMENT. I couldn't have done this without you Mom, Angie, Dad and Mar.
To my two WONDERFUL kids, you are my world Raeghyn and Mason. I love you both to infinity and beyond
Last but not least, my cover model CJ. I can’t really say in words how very proud I am of you. Together we have something HUGE to celebrate. I’m honored you’ve allowed me to use you as my model and MUSE for Jesika….thank you!!!.
An uneasy sensation forms in the pit of my stomach, a loss of control building as anticipation takes over my train of thought. I am lying to myself if I say I don’t have high hopes for this evening with Jesika. No matter what I want to do, rejection continues to play through the visions of her in my mind. I wish I could read her, know exactly what she’s feeling and predict how she will react once I share my sexual desires with her.
She’s meek, humble and reserved yet her love of life comes through in her beautiful hazel eyes and hypnotic smile. Everything about her pulls me toward her, driving a need to consume her. I plan to indulge in her wants, needs and longing. With just a touch of my hand, her body instantly reacts to the feel of my skin. With everything I am, I must have her and show her the pleasures of pain only I can satisfy.
I’m a man who thrives on passion, dominance and authority, but I’ve held back sharing the most intimate details of who I really am with Jesika. I’ve kept my true self hidden from her in fear that she would reject me, leave and tear apart my soul. I’ve allowed her to fall through the cracks of my cold, black heart and now…now there’s no other choice but expose her to the life I live.
Tonight everything will change.
Tonight I will show her my world in a way only her eyes will appreciate.
Tonight she will submit herself to my every command and desire, she will be mine.
As we approach downtown, the lights surrounding the museums shine brightly through the night sky illuminating the exhibit’s sign that reads Strike a Pose. Tonight, Jesika is accompanying me to the largest erotic art exhibit in the country. The paintings, sculptures and various items that will be on display portray the world of BDSM in a form that she can see and feel. It is my hope that through her sense of sight, she will capture the beauty of submission and all the sensual pleasures it can provide.
Escorting her from the cab and onto the sidewalk, my hand falls to the small of her back. The subtle tightening of her muscles sends a jolt of excitement through me, every nerve ending in my body on high alert. The thought of her responding so quickly to my touch creates visions in my mind that, in this moment I cannot process. As badly as I want to remove the sexual images running through my imagination, I can’t help but picture bending her over and slamming my hard cock into her wet pussy.
“Connor,” her soft voice calls out. “The doors have opened.”
Clearing the intimate vision from my mind, I turn toward her beautiful face.
“Ahh, wonderful,” I respond. “I truly hope you enjoy this exhibit, it’s one of the finest in the country.”
“I’m looking forward to it,” she remarks with a smile.
As we move between each display, I can’t take my eyes off of her and the way her brow furrows as her eyes become wide with curiosity. Some pieces are simple, less bold whereas a few others are more detailed. Each item demonstrates the craft within the artist and the sexual seduction they are able to express through their masterpieces. Watching her become so captivated and intrigued has me mesmerized. I want to touch her so badly; my hands are balled up into fists along my side. It’s taking all of the willpower I have not to extend my arm and run my fingertips along her smooth skin. She’s a phenomenal creature, her lack of knowledge and sexual inexperience oozes from her body without her even knowing it.
Stepping forward, we move toward the final painting of the exhibit. The artist has remarkably demonstrated the allurement of the dominant man hovering over the willing body of his submissive. The expression on the female subject’s face is passionate, a presence of absolute bliss seeping from her lips as she’s restrained and under complete control. My eyes watch Jesika’s mannerisms as a whispered gasp falls from her lips. With a trembling hand, she delicately covers her mouth as her gaze scans every inch of the canvas. It is in this exact moment I know I need to share with her everything I’ve been holding back.
“Jesika,” I render in a husky tone.
Her hand falls to her side as she turns to face me, hazel eyes filled with such compassion staring back to me.
“These pieces…this exhibit, it’s all so real. Everything I’ve seen tonight appears to be so lifelike, it’s extraordinary, Connor. For years I’ve captured images of models and scenery, yet nothing compares to what I’ve just experienced.”
“I can’t tell you how happy I am to hear you enjoyed yourself, but I must be honest. Tonight I brought you here to not only show you works of art, I wanted you to envision the world in which I live.”
Pausing for a moment, I stop as my heart rate begins to accelerate and a wave of fear lurks up my spine.
“I-I don’t understand,” she replies shifting her e
yes from mine.
“Look at me, Jesika,” I command in deep tone, lifting her chin so that her eyes are meeting mine.
“I’m baring something so sacred to you and my only wish is that you’ll be willing to try to accept me for the man I am. No woman has ever made me feel the way that you do. I’ve never given anyone the power to control my emotional state, yet when you’re in my presence, every reflection I have is of you. I’m not your average man, Jesika, my sexual interests are quite unique. But if you’ll allow me, I’d like to show you how passionate we can be together.”
Watching her suck in her bottom lip, I carefully observe her expression as my body begins to crave her skin against mine.
“This is all so much to take in, Connor. If this…this exhibit showcased what your interests are, I don’t know that I’m capable of doing anything like this. I’ve never…”
I stop her right then and there. Her self-doubt is clouding everything I want her to feel. She has to want to experience this with me, not fear the unknown.
“Jesika, let me show you pleasure like you’ve never felt. Allow me to treasure every inch of your body until you can barely breathe. Submit yourself to me.”
Walking down the street, my nerves are a scattered mess of insecurities. I’m doing everything I can to remain confident and poised as my inner thoughts are wreaking havoc within my mind. I turn to face him and catch him staring. My stomach does a summersault and I can’t help but want to melt right here on the concrete path with that amazing smile he’s flashing in my direction. In this exact moment, Connor makes me feel like I’m the most beautiful woman in the world…even if my subconscious threatens me otherwise.
As we move along the sidewalk, my eyes scan the buildings, the busy street, the lights of the traffic signal and oncoming cars. With my arm looped through his, I follow in step as he leads us toward the tall condominium structure of his home. Putting a smile on my face, I try to ignore the thoughts racing through my mind. I’m torn…I’m excited yet on edge to see where this night could be going.
Connor and I have gone out a few times, nothing that has led to much of anything more than a dinner date, but tonight something was very different. He’s always been such a gentleman never pushing for anything physical before tonight. As we walk, for the life of me, I can’t tell what he’s thinking and it’s driving me insane. I’m a grown ass woman making myself nuts and acting like an adolescent. I’m beginning to sense an attachment to him and it scares the hell out of me. I’ve got a good head on my shoulders and the distraction he presents is taking over my will to process a coherent thought.
Ugh, focus, Jesika, he’s just a man… you are just a woman he is taking back to his place. Chill and relax.
He’s a successful attorney and I know his firm and clients require his attention twenty-four seven. I don’t mind it in the slightest; in fact, I completely understand the need to stay in tune with our professional sides. It’s what drives us and one of the few things we have in common. We may come from different backgrounds and mingle with extremely opposing crowds, but when it’s just the two of us, something seems to click. I just can’t seem to put my finger on it and honestly, I can’t imagine what he sees in me. I’m nothing short of an average looking woman trying to make a life for herself. No matter how hard I primp, pluck and dress the part, I’ll never look like the models I photograph day in and day out. I’m just not one of those sexual beings men flock to, at least not til now.
Anxiety rushes through me as we near the front door and knowing he has plans for me sets my heart into an unsteady rhythm. My lack of sexual experience has always been a concern of mine, especially when I start to see a man as frequently as Connor and I have. I’ve had my fair share of unstable relationships over the past few years and made the mistake of giving myself to men that only used me for their advantage. In the bedroom, I find myself more so a follower than a leader. When things get hot and heavy, I turn and run the other way rather than let myself go completely. Intimacy is the one thing I’ve never willingly given to a man. Instead, I play the part and walk away with my head between my legs in regret of my actions. Some may say I’m a prude, but in reality I really don’t know what I want and if I’m willing to give that part of myself to someone who will only hurt me in the end.
Connor seems to be the type of man who can have any woman he wants, but he’s choosing to spend his time with me. I may be getting ahead of myself here, but I’m beginning to think I’m in way over my head going back to his place. I can already feel my heart beginning to race, anticipation surging through my body.
I think back to earlier tonight when he shared his interests with me, our eyes connected in a way they never have before. I felt my core aching for him, like nothing I’ve ever experienced. There was an urgent need, a want and a desire for him to touch me. His hand brushed mine, his leg rested against the sheer nylons clinging to my legs and I felt as though I would explode. Maybe it was the paintings, the sculptures and various other pieces of art that sent my libido into frenzy. My body was craving him and my mind was spinning not knowing if he was feeling the same passion filling the small space between us. I’ve never felt such a strong tie to a man I’ve dated and, to be honest, Connor intrigues me and I can’t help but want to know more about the man I’ve been seeing on and off for the past few weeks.
God damn it, Jesika, pull your shit together. You are not falling for this man.
Taking in a deep breath through my nose, I attempt to remain cool, calm and collected. He’s taking rein over my mind and I can’t seem to stop the thoughts racing through my head. There’s a hint of mystery behind his deep, dark chocolate eyes. The way he runs his fingers through his perfectly shaggy, jet black hair sends me into a pit of despair. He does things to me that I’m not sure I can comprehend. My lack of experience, fear of intimacy and all the insecurities I’ve built up make me feel as though I’m not good enough to be with such a man.
By any outside man or woman, I appear to have my shit together. I come from money, a family that has done well for themselves over the generations and, to be truthful, I’ve never wanted for much. But behind the stellar façade I’ve built up, I’m just a woman that wants to find excitement…I’m just scared.
Success has never been something I needed to make me happy. I’ve worked hard to get where I am today, with little to no help from my family. My future was always something I wanted to gain for myself, not have it handed down to me. I may have chosen an alternative path than what was expected of me—a career in the oil industry just wasn’t something that piqued my interest. Instead, I thrived on beauty, capturing something of essence that no one else could and learned the skills that helped make me one of the top-notch fashion photographers in the country.
My childhood dreams came true—I do what I love and I get to travel the world. There’s just one thing missing, someone to share in everything that I have to offer…companionship, friendship and a love that will last forever.
We enter the front of the building, his arm moving from mine to the small of my back as he guides me through the lobby toward the elevators. My eyes meet his as we step inside, butterflies swarming within the pit of my stomach. Never for a moment do I shift my gaze from his movements as the seconds tick past in slow motion. His hand reaches into his pocket for the key card. With a seamless motion, he swipes it against the key pad and the elevator doors shut before we ascend to one of the top floors. I swallow the lump that has formed in the back of my throat while my fingers intertwine uneasily with one another. The hairs on the back of my neck begin to rise; goosebumps cover every inch of my skin.
My body freezes as the elevator comes to a stop and the doors open. On trembling legs, I step toward him and accept his outstretched hand with mine. Focusing on not tumbling in my five-inch heels, I follow him through the beautifully decorated space as we make our way to the entrance of his home. I immediately take in my surroundings of marble floors, an ornate table and mirror along the side wall
and large, dark, wooden door leading into a place that once the door opens, I don’t know if I’ll be willing to let down the wall of insecurities I’ve kept up for far too long.
Before taking another step toward the door, Connor stops turning to face me. With his large yet gentle hands, he cups my face. Everything around me seems to be closing in as he brings my face closer to his, our lips touch and my world begins to spin as my knees weaken.
Without hesitation, I allow my body to mold into his. The fast-paced beat of my heart is pounding hard enough against his chest I’m certain he can feel it, yet he doesn’t push away. Attempting to fall more so into the moment and not pay attention to the caution flags swaying behind my closed lids, I release a soft moan. The sound of my pleasure vibrating against his lips encourages him to deepen the kiss. Biting down on my lower lip, he gains access to my now open mouth allowing his tongue to touch mine. He tastes like whiskey mixed with mint, it’s the most intoxicating flavor. I’m enraptured in this man with just a kiss and I can’t help but want more…no, need more from him. My hands move from the sides of my body into his hair, fingering the dark locks. Desire takes over and I can’t control myself, he’s pulled me in and there’s no going back now. As I’m sucking his tongue into my mouth, his arms wrap around my waist circling me into his embrace. The intensity of the moment consumes me and I can’t help but feel that I’m in a bubble of lust and longing.
Pulling back, Connor looks into my eyes and brushes a loose strand of hair away from my face. As I look back to him, those deep dark eyes make every sensation in my body heighten. His fingertips trail down my face, along my collarbone and linger down the thin material of my blouse. I can feel my chest beginning to swell, screaming for him to touch and adore every inch of my aching breasts. If he doesn’t take me inside now, I may burst from yearning. He’s driving me insane and making me feel things that are totally out of my comfort zone. The wetness pooling in my panties is a sure sign that my body is telling me what I want from him, yet this isn’t the woman I normally am. If I let myself go, there’s no telling where this adventure will take me. He’s gorgeous and my body wants him. Hell, even with all of my doubts and insecurities, he’s exactly what I want and he’s right here in front of me gazing at me. Me.
