by Parker, Lexy
Her mouth dropped open. “You’re supposed to give it tomorrow?”
“Yes.”
“Oh.”
“Exactly. Honestly, I wasn’t going to do it at all. Then, I agreed to do it and now I’m kind of a nervous wreck about the whole thing. I don’t want to start crying in front of everyone. It’s supposed to be a happy occasion and people are going to be celebrating. I don’t want to ruin the fun and bring everyone down,” I confessed, finally giving words to my deepest fear.
“I think tears can be a good thing. Sometimes, people want to see you cry. If you cry, it gives them permission to cry.”
I laughed, nodding my head. “You’re pretty smart for such a young person. Gage grew up here and was a big part of the community. I know a lot of people still miss him. His sister is my best friend. I’m making her get on that stage beside me.”
“Good. I think that’s a great idea. Do you want me to help you write it? I don’t know your husband, but I can give you a good generic speech and then you can just sprinkle little tidbits of information about him in between the lines,” she offered.
“That’s very sweet, but I think I need to do this. I’m going to keep it short and sweet,” I told her.
“Those are always the best kind of speeches,” she said with a giggle.
“Exactly. Nobody wants to hear my sad tale.”
“I don’t know about that, but I think you being there and being a part of the dedication is pretty special and that will speak for itself. I really do think it’s awesome that they are making a memorial to him. He must have been a really special person,” she said.
I nodded my head, smiling, picturing his face. “He was. He was larger than life and the kindest man I have ever met. He was funny and handsome and would do anything for his friends.”
She was smiling at me. “Sounds to me you have already got most of your speech done. Speak from the heart. Maybe you don’t need to write anything down.”
I grimaced, shaking my head. “I have to write something down or I’ll get up there and become speechless. It will be me standing there in front of a quiet crowd with nothing to say. Everyone will feel awkward.”
“Don’t worry about what anyone else is thinking or feeling. My mom used to tell me to pretend it was only me and her in the room whenever I had to do any kind of public speaking at school. I could tune everyone out and just talk to her. It was like we were at home in the kitchen, sipping tea and it was just the two of us,” she said.
“Did you do a lot of public speaking?” I asked her.
She nodded. “I did. I used to do a lot of pageants,” she said, wrinkling her nose. “It’s so embarrassing to admit that, but the scholarship money was good, and I figured I could smile and look pretty if it paid for my education.”
“Wow. Another piece of the little Kasey puzzle. That’s good to know. Don’t be embarrassed. We all do what we have to, and I bet you were quite the beauty queen,” I teased.
She rolled her eyes. “I will never wear another tiara again. When I get married, I am sticking with an old-fashioned veil. I refuse to wear one of those little princess crowns. No sashes, no glitter and no big hair. I never want to revisit those pageant days.”
“You’re a good egg, Kasey. I’m glad to know you,” I told her, meaning every word.
“Well, thank you. I’m happy to know you too.”
We quickly ate the rest of our sack lunches before getting back into the swing of appointments. I really liked Kasey and hoped she did stick around for a while. She was very genuine and wise beyond her years. The world could use more people like her in it. She had given me confidence and helped set my mind at ease about tomorrow. I liked her idea of just chatting to one other person. With Jamie beside me, I could focus on her and talk to her like I had done a million times before.
Chapter 11
Clay
I felt like I was twelve and being dragged to the park with my mother. I didn’t often come to the town’s monthly gatherings. There was always something to celebrate. I was convinced every one of the celebrations was nothing more than an excuse for the ladies to bust out their best baked goods in a little game of friendly competition to see who the best cook was. I certainly didn’t mind sampling the goods, but I didn’t care for all the mingling. I was more of a private person.
The town gatherings were all about catching up on the latest gossip for the older crowd and the younger crowd used it as a bit of a popularity contest. There were groups of young men and groups of young women giggling at the men. I remembered when I had been young and showing up at these things. Usually, it was me and my friends sneaking off to get into trouble or maybe sneaking off into the trees with a girl.
I smiled and nodded at the people I knew, noticing a small crowd of people gathered around one very tall drink of water. I recognized him as Dayton Black. The guy who’d made it big in the MLB and then got hurt and had to retire. He was Hope’s little claim to fame. I never got the chance to know him. He was several years younger. I had already been off to war when he was making a name for himself. I kept walking, my mother stopping every few feet to introduce her other son to her many friends and acquaintances in town. She didn’t bother introducing me. Either the people knew me already or she assumed they did.
“Look, there’s George from church. Let’s listen to him play,” my mom said excitedly.
We found a spot to listen to the live band playing up on the stage. They were currently singing a Beach Boys song, which seemed to please my mom. I smiled, watching her sway back and forth to the music.
“My God,” Emmitt grumbled under his breath.
“Do you have anything like this in New York?” my mother asked Emmitt, who’d had a perpetual scowl on his face since he’d gotten out of the car. The music wasn’t doing much to improve his mood.
“Mother, we have real culture, real bands playing in the park at festivals. New York is too big and too busy to have silly cookouts like this,” he said in an insulting tone.
“It’s not a silly cookout,” I argued. “This is something fun for everyone.”
“Emmitt, you used to love coming to these,” she cajoled.
“No, I never did. They’re dirty, it smells and it’s hot,” he whined.
I shook my head at him. “These are people. It’s almost summer and the smells are actually very good. I’ve been to New York. It smells a lot worse,” I snapped.
“People in New York are always working and being productive. You smell commerce. You smell success,” he said in a haughty tone.
I watched my mom’s smile slip just a bit. “This is all for a good cause. The money raised will be going to the local Wounded Warriors chapter.”
“I’m sure the money raised from selling jam and charging kids to bounce in an inflatable house should be plenty to buy someone a meal,” Emmitt quipped.
“People in New York need to loosen up a bit,” I said, directing the comment at my brother.
He rolled his eyes. “New York is one of the biggest commerce hubs in the world. Without the city and the people who work hard to keep the entire world running, you folks down in Podunk, Tennessee wouldn’t have anything to celebrate. They work so you don’t have to.”
It was my turn to roll my eyes. “You make it sound like the rest of the country are leeches. I don’t think New York is responsible for growing the food for the world. It’s Small Town America that’s sending people to fight for New York to sit up there all high and mighty. Without the people from this place, you wouldn’t be able to sit back and count your millions,” I told him, feeling myself growing angrier by the second.
I was sick of his condescending attitude. I was sick of him thinking he was better than everyone because he lived in the city and made lots of money. I liked the people in my hometown and I knew every damn one of them worked just as hard, if not harder than Emmitt. They just had the common courtesy not to flaunt it.
“I’m sure he didn’t mean anything bad by his comments,” my mother sai
d, trying to diffuse the tenseness between Emmitt and me.
“Oh, of course not.”
“I meant what I said. You guys are acting like this picnic in the park is so special. It’s the same thing every year and it’s been the same thing for decades. It’s stale and boring,” he complained.
“I think the word you’re looking for is traditional. It’s a tradition that everyone that lives here appreciates. People travel here from hundreds of miles away for some of our festivals,” I told him.
He scoffed, glaring at a little kid running by. “Don’t you think you’re a little too old for all this?”
“Me? Dude come on. How can you not love this?” I said, goading him a little more.
“Emmitt, why don’t we get you something to eat? I think you have low blood sugar,” my mom said, rubbing his upper arm.
“My blood sugar is fine. I’m only staying a few more minutes and then I’ll catch a cab home. I have calls to make,” he said, obviously lying.
“Oh, Emmitt, you said you’d stay for a while,” my mom pouted.
I couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. “I’ll be around for a while, Mom. If you need me, I’ll be here,” I assured her.
She was looking at Emmitt. I don’t even think she heard me. That’s the way it was. She focused all her time and energy on Emmitt. He was truly the sun and the moon in her life. I was convinced it was why he was such an asshole. He didn’t know what it was like to be out in the cold. If he did, he would try a little harder to stay in her good graces.
“I see Philip. I’m going to go and talk to him. I’m sure if you do happen to need me, you’ll find me,” I said and walked away from the two of them.
I needed some space away from my brother before I said or did something that really upset my mother. I didn’t want to do anything to embarrass her in front of her friends. She was proud of her Emmitt and it wasn’t up to me to try and take that away from her. One day she might see him for what he really was—an asshole. A selfish, self-centered, narcissistic asshole.
I took long strides, cutting through the crowd to get to Philip. I was glad he was tall. He stood above everyone else. He was talking to a couple of men, looking a little uncomfortable. I walked over, silently asking him if everything was okay.
“Clay!” he said a little too loudly.
“Hi, Philip,” I said, my gaze going to the two men.
“These guys were just telling me about their new business in town,” he said, a little tense.
“Oh, really? What business is that?” I asked.
Philip looked uncomfortable. “They just opened a new delivery service. They pick up your groceries, your prescriptions, dry cleaning, whatever you need and deliver it right to your door.”
I raised my eyebrows, suddenly understanding why he had looked so uncomfortable. “Really? Well, that sounds like a very helpful service.”
“We’re here just to get the word out. We’re cheap and affordable. We have offices in a few other towns and are hoping to branch out here,” one of the men said, handing me a business card.
“Good luck to you. I’ll keep you in mind if I’m too lazy to go get a gallon of milk,” I said with a wink.
He smiled. “That’s exactly what we do. Busy moms that don’t have time to run all their errands, elderly people or if you’re feeling under the weather, that’s what we’re here for!” he said excitedly.
I nodded. “Good to know, thank you.”
They took their leave. Philip looked at me, studying my face. “I swear, they came up to me out of the blue.”
“It’s cool. I’ve heard of these companies. I think they have their niche and I have mine,” I said, pretending not to be bothered.
In truth, I was very bothered. I wondered just how much business they would take. If they drove around in little Prius cars, they could definitely charge less. I could be looking at the downfall of my company. I might find myself behind the wheel of one of their little cars, working for them.
“Business will pick up,” he assured me.
“Where’s Sadie and Jamie?” I asked, changing the subject back to a less stressful topic.
“They went to grab something to drink. I’m guessing Sadie is asking Jamie to buy her everything under the moon and knowing my pretty wife, she’s doing it.”
I grinned, knowing he loved them both dearly. “She’s a good mother.”
“Yes, she is. Sadie loves her. Sadie is also demanding she get another sibling in the house,” he said.
“Really? Is that on the table?”
He shrugged. “I think so. We’ve talked about it, but haven’t made any firm plans. I’m up for it. I would love for her to have my babies.”
I burst into laughter. “Plural. Wow.”
He was looking over my shoulder. “I see your brother’s here. How’s that been? I got the feeling there was definitely some bad blood between you. You make me rethink the idea of having more than one kid.”
I groaned. “He’s just been filling us in on how the rest of the country should be thanking New Yorkers for working hard and skipping out on silly gatherings like this.”
“Ouch. Wasn’t he raised here?” he asked.
“Yes, but he acts like he was hatched somewhere up north,” I grumbled.
Philip chuckled. “Well, your mother isn’t going to let him forget anytime soon.”
I turned to look and saw her introducing him to a lady from her church. Emmitt looked afraid to get too close to the people he was mingling with. I thought it was funny. The golden boy had some very different ideas about who was worthy of his time. My mom wanted everyone to see him.
Sadie came bounding over, a soda in one hand and cotton candy in the other. Philip looked pained. “Sadie,” he moaned.
“Relax, it’s one day,” Jamie said, drinking her own soda.
“But both?” he complained.
She leaned up on her toes and gave him a quick kiss. “I’ve got to find Dani. It’s almost time.”
“Time?” I asked, looking at Philip when Jamie walked away.
“She’s giving a little speech. Jamie is going up with her,” he explained. “Come on, they’ll be on the stage,” he said and started to move in the general direction.
“A speech?” I asked, wondering what was going on.
We moved to the front of the crowd, Sadie standing in between the two of us. I watched as Dani walked onto the stage. She was wearing a pretty blue dress that fell mid-thigh with a light knit sweater over the top. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail. She had sunglasses pushed up on her head, exposing her face completely. She was a gorgeous woman, just absolutely stunning. She had such a natural beauty that drew me in.
Her husband was a lucky man. And a smart man for putting a ring on his lady’s finger.
Chapter 12
Dani
Nervous as hell wasn’t the way to describe how I was feeling as I took my place in front of the little microphone stand that had been set up. I didn’t like public speaking in general but speaking about Gage was even harder. I was a private person and didn’t like to talk about my personal life with strangers. I turned to look at Jamie, needing a little support and encouragement. She smiled, looking calm and relaxed.
My eyes drifted to the bench that had been set under a large oak tree, a gleaming, gold plaque affixed to the center of it. I had looked at it earlier, my fingers tracing over the name of a man who had meant the world to me. My heart still hurt, and I would always miss him, but it was a different kind of pain. It wasn’t quite as sharp, and it didn’t drop me to my knees. It was more of a fondness that I felt, like remembering the smell of your mom’s fresh, baked cookies when you came home after school. With time, the pain had lessened and there were a lot of sweet memories to ease the ache.
“Good afternoon, everyone,” I started. “It sure is a beautiful day!”
There was a resounding yes and some other comments. I relaxed a little.
“I’ve been asked to say a few
words. First, I don’t think I ever got the chance to personally thank everyone for their kindness, love and support. Without you, his loss would have been unbearable. I don’t think any of us is truly ready to lose someone we love, but all the support we received helped us through it. This bench, it’s a symbol of the love and support of this fine community. You guys really came together and pulled not only myself, but Jamie, through what was easily one of the hardest times of my life. I’m thankful to have this bench for everyone to enjoy and I hope you will all remember Gage, but not just Gage’s sacrifice. There are men and women from all over making the ultimate sacrifice so we can all enjoy the freedoms we love. When you see the bench, I hope you will all take a minute to thank a veteran and their families. It’s because of brave, courageous men and women like Gage that we get to be here today. Thank you again for this honor. His family and I appreciate it.”
“We love you, Dani!” someone shouted.
I felt tears spring to my eyes. “And I love all of you. Being a widow at the age of twenty-eight was certainly not the plan I had for my life, but I know there are plenty of military spouses who find themselves in the same position. Thank you, each and every one of you, for going out of your way to make this happen.”
Jamie reached for my hand, squeezing it before waving at the crowd. “Thank you all so much for this. I hope you will all take a minute to check out the bench. It really is something special,” she said.
There were a few tears on the faces of the people that had known Gage personally. It warmed my heart to see how many people cared. I had been so worried he would be forgotten. I remembered the days following his death, when I would look out my window and be so angry that everyone was going on with their lives as if nothing had happened. My life had ended that day and everyone else was still living and getting to hug their loved ones.
It wasn’t until months after the death, I began to realize my life hadn’t ended. It had changed. I had to start over. All of my thinking had to change. I was a single woman in the world. I had to do for myself. I couldn’t talk to my husband or tell people my husband was in the military.
