by Parker, Lexy
He shook his head. “You’re like everyone else. Everyone always saw Emmitt as this great prodigy. They couldn’t see the darkness in him. If I ever said anything that even sounded remotely negative about him, people, mostly my mom, would jump all over me. I didn’t understand Emmitt, or I was just jealous of him. It kills me to know everyone looks at me and sees me as the poor younger brother who never got it together. The poor brother who got kicked out of the marines and never made anything of himself. Poor Clay couldn’t even find a wife.”
My heart hurt thinking of all Clay had been living with. I should have been more sympathetic toward him. Clay was a good man and never asked for anything. He had that quiet humbleness about him. I knew he was the type of man who would give someone the shirt off his back and never ask for a thank you or any kind of recognition. He had been living in Emmitt’s shadow, quietly and without complaint.
“I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. I should have taken your word on it.”
He shrugged, shaking his head. “It doesn’t matter. You saw the golden boy. The kid from the small town who went off to New York and struck gold. You looked at me, the guy who’s been single his whole life, lives in a tiny little house and owns a business that is barely staying afloat. It’s no wonder you automatically believed he couldn’t be capable of such horrific things.”
“Clay. I’m sorry. I don’t think that way. I know you’re a good man. I made a mistake. I’ve apologized for it. What can I do to help?” I asked him.
He smirked. “I think you have done enough. Please, don’t give me any more help. I need to go.”
“Clay, no. Don’t do this. Don’t let it end like this. You can’t blame me for this. I couldn’t have known, and it would have happened regardless,” I quietly pleaded.
“I can’t deal with all of this right now,” he muttered.
“You don’t have to deal with it. I’m here. I’ve apologized and we already said we wanted to make this work between us. I’m here for you and only you. Whatever you need,” I told him.
“I need to check on my parents, make sure Emmitt’s little friends didn’t pay them a visit and rough them up a bit. That’s what I need. I don’t need you or anyone else,” he snapped.
My jaw dropped and my stomach twisted in knots. “Oh no,” I gasped. “Really? They wouldn’t.”
“Oh, yes they would. Why wouldn’t they? Do you think they came to my place first?”
“Oh, Clay, I’ll go with you,” I said, shutting the door and moving to put on my seatbelt.
“No. Get out. You’ve done plenty. I don’t need you for this. I can handle this all on my own,” he said, staring out the window again.
He couldn’t even look at me. That was not a good sign. “Clay, please, we need to talk about this.”
“No, we don’t. There’s nothing to say. You wanted me to kiss and make up with my brother and I did. That certainly worked out well. Now, I have to figure out how to come up with twenty grand or watch my business, the thing that pays my bills, burn to the ground because my brother is a jackass,” he snarled, turning to glare at me. “My business hasn’t made me wealthy. I don’t have the option of tapping into my fat bank account to bail out my brother if that’s going to be your suggestion.”
“No, absolutely not. I don’t think you have to bail him out, nor do I think you should. This is his problem,” I said vehemently.
“Doesn’t matter now, does it? It’s my problem. A problem I let walk right into my life, let him handle my money and my books. I need to go. Get out,” he said, refusing to look at me again.
It was obvious we weren’t going to solve anything right then. I nodded my head and opened the door, hopping out and looking at him one more time. He refused to look at me. He stared straight ahead, put the truck in drive and waited for me to back away. I closed the door and stepped back. He hit the gas and left me standing there watching his truck fade away.
This was not how I envisioned the day going. Thirty minutes ago, we were on the path to a happy night. Then, there was Emmitt. Fucking Emmitt. I stomped back inside the shop, ready to tear the guy limb from limb with my bare hands. He deserved to have the shit beat out of him. It really was too bad the thugs weren’t the kind that busted kneecaps. I would not be sad to see Emmitt get his kneecaps bashed in.
I walked into Clay’s office. Emmitt was sitting in Clay’s chair, his head in his hands. I stood in the doorway and stared at him. “Get the money.”
“I don’t have it,” he said, not looking up at me.
“Find a way to get it. This is your mess. He shouldn’t have to pay for your mistakes. Call one of your rich friends.”
“I don’t have any friends,” he whined.
I rolled my eyes. “I’m shocked,” I said dryly. “Clay doesn’t owe this, you do.”
“I know that, but I don’t have any money. If I had it, do you really think I would have come back here? Do you think I would willingly come back to Hope if there was a way for me to fix this? You act like I wanted this,” he whined.
“How do you owe someone twenty thousand dollars? How does that happen? I thought you were some big hotshot that was living the high life?” I said, looking at him with disgust.
“You don’t understand how things work. You don’t get it. Living in New York and trying to keep up with the others in my firm took money. I couldn’t show up in cheap knock-off suits. I was making good money, but I had a lot of debt,” he said.
“Debt? Like what kind of debt?” I snapped.
He looked down at the desk. “Me and the guys, we liked to play cards in some underground arenas. I was good at it, really good. I always came out ahead, but I think, I think one of those assholes was playing me. Someone was cheating. They offered small loans and I took them. I paid them back as soon as I won. Then I stopped winning. The company went bankrupt and I got blackballed for some bad moves I had made for some clients. No one would touch me. The loan sharks kept coming around and I freaked out. I packed my suitcase and came home.”
“You came home and brought the stink with you. I hope your brother beats the shit out of you,” I said, walking to the front door. I threw it open, the bells jingling behind me.
I got in my car and looked back at the shop. I couldn’t believe there was a chance it could actually be destroyed in a matter of days because one asshole couldn’t handle his business. It made me sick. The worst part about it was I might have played a small role in the whole damn thing. Me and my big nose butting into everyone’s business.
I vowed I had learned my lesson. I would never do it again. I would mind my own business and ignore the urge to offer advice about the way anyone else was handling their business. Not. My. Problem.
Chapter 35
Clay
I sat down at the kitchen table, my bank statements spread out and my laptop open. I grabbed the cup of coffee, sipped it and stared at the numbers. I was fucked. The money I had put aside for an emergency was enough to cover Emmitt’s debt, but it would drain me. The money I had in my various IRAs couldn’t be withdrawn by Monday. I couldn’t believe I was being forced to dip into the retirement nest egg I had been building to bail out my brother.
It all seemed so unfair. I had kept my head down, stayed out of trouble and I was the one paying through the nose for trouble I didn’t cause. Trouble I didn’t even know about. I could have kept my distance and sent Emmitt packing if I had known he had loan sharks breathing down his neck. It was more of his deception.
I tapped the pen against the table. I didn’t have a choice. I was going to be forced to drain my account to save my business. All I could do was hope for the best, pray nothing went wrong. It was going to be a huge struggle just to make payroll. I had to get the other truck fixed, which required money. I hated what Emmitt had done. I hated that I was left holding the bag. My parents didn’t have that kind of money and I didn’t want them to know about the trouble. The men had gone to the house looking for Emmitt, but had kept it civil, which
I was grateful for.
I was going to pay and then I was going to kick him out of my life for good. I didn’t know if I needed to take out an ad in the paper or what, but I wanted all of his creditors to know I was not associated with him.
There was a knock on the door. I debated ignoring it, but whoever was at my door on a Saturday morning was not likely to go away with me simply ignoring them. I got up, grabbed my T-shirt off the back of the chair and pulled it on before walking to the door.
“What do you want?” I growled, opening the door to find Emmitt standing there.
He looked sheepish, but it wasn’t going to persuade me to forgive him. “I want to talk.”
“About what? We’ve never talked. In all my years on this earth, you have never talked to me. Why now?”
“You know why. Let me in. I want to explain,” he said, looking up at me.
“No.”
“Clay, quit being stubborn. I need to talk to you,” he insisted.
“I have nothing to say to you. You are a waste of time,” I muttered.
“I’m going to stand here until you hear me out,” he said firmly.
“My God. Do you ever quit? Do you always get what you want?”
He offered a small smile. “Usually, but that’s not the case here. This is as much for me as it is for you.”
I yanked the door open, knowing he wasn’t going to leave until he got his way. He walked in, looking around before taking a seat on the couch. I could practically feel him judging my house, comparing it to his big, fancy place. Of course, I had a home and he didn’t. At least I had a home right now. It was hard to say how many more loan sharks were going to come crawling out of the woodwork to demand more money. At that point, I’d be forced to give up everything if I wanted to stay alive.
“Hurry up and say your piece,” I said, standing and staring at him.
I wasn’t going to sit down and have a casual conversation with him. We weren’t friends. I didn’t want to be his friend and I sure as hell didn’t want to be his brother. It was only DNA that bound us together. I would never believe we shared any other similarities. I was not like him in any way shape or form. We didn’t even look alike.
“Will you please sit?” he asked.
“No.”
“Clay, this isn’t easy for me,” he started. “You know I don’t like to admit when I’m wrong. Hell, I’m hardly ever wrong but in this case, I was. I can admit that.”
“Good. I don’t want it to be easy for you. Your whole life has been easy. It’s about time things got a little difficult for you. It’s about time you had to be held accountable for your actions, but I guess that’s not the case once again. You’re not being held accountable for your shitty actions—I am. I get to pay your debt and you get to carry on with your merry little life, going around, fucking people over and being your perfect self. No one will ever know you are not the golden boy you say you are. I’ll keep your secret only because it’s embarrassing for me to be related to you,” I told him.
“I’m sorry. You’re right. I should be the one paying the debt and I intend to, but I can’t do it by Monday,” he said as if that was a good excuse. “I made the debt and I want to make good on it.”
“So, I should pay it and just wait for you to figure your shit out?” I growled.
“No, you shouldn’t. Look, I fucked up. I fucked up bad. I’m in a bad place. I swear, I’ve learned from my mistakes. It isn’t going to happen again,” he stated.
I scoffed. “Really? Can you swear there aren’t any more people out there looking for money you owe?”
“No. There is no one else.”
I finally flopped down in my favorite chair, running my hands through my hair. “What the fuck happened, Emmitt? You were supposed to be riding high up there.”
“I was. I wanted to be. I overextended myself. I kept expecting to make big bonuses. Every quarter, I was certain I had it in the bag and then something would happen, and I wouldn’t make the bonus. I spent like I would and then I didn’t, and I was maxed out,” he defended.
“Why didn’t you stop spending? Why keep spending money you didn’t have?” I asked, not able to wrap my head around the idea.
He shrugged. “Because I wanted to be successful. I wanted to be the big guy on the street. In order to be the big guy, I had to wear nice suits and drive flashy cars and eat at the best restaurants when I went out.”
I shook my head. “And now what do you have? All that showboating and you have nothing.”
“You’re right. I don’t. I already admitted it. I fucked up. I don’t know what else to say,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.
“Whatever. I’ll pay your fucking debt and then we are through. I don’t want to see you again and I don’t want you dragging Mom and Dad into this. They don’t deserve to pay for your bullshit,” I told him.
“Don’t. I’ll figure out how to take care of it,” he said, looking down at his hands.
“How? How do you suppose you’ll take care of it?” I asked him.
He shrugged a shoulder. “I don’t know.”
“I’ve got the money. I’ll pay them on Monday. I don’t trust you enough to give it to you. You’ll probably skip town and leave me holding the bag.”
“No, I wouldn’t. I never wanted any of you to know about this.”
I shook my head with disgust. “You actually thought you could move home and they wouldn’t find you? Welcome to the twenty-first century, asshole. Anyone can find anyone especially when you came home!” I shouted.
“I didn’t have anywhere else to go. This was the only place I knew to go,” he argued.
“Not good enough. You should have taken out a legit loan with a bank. You should have worked out some kind of payment arrangement. I don’t care if you had to get a job flipping burgers, you could have done something!”
I felt the anger bubbling up. Years of frustration and repressed anger were coming to the surface. I had spent my life holding back, not rocking the boat that Emmitt was the captain of. I couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t pretend his obnoxious behavior didn’t bother me. I couldn’t put on a fake smile and go about my day while everyone looked at me with pity and those looks that said they were sorry I wasn’t as good as my brother.
“You’re right. I probably didn’t make the best decision. I can admit that.”
“I’ll have the money on Monday. We’re done here,” I said.
He looked at me. I could see he was sorry and embarrassed, but I wasn’t going to feel bad. I was done feeling bad for him.
“Clay,” he said.
I held up my hand, shaking my head. “It’s time for you to go. We’re done here.”
He let out a long sigh before getting to his feet. “Should I bother showing up for work on Monday?”
“I’d prefer you didn’t.”
He nodded his head. “I understand.”
I walked to the door and opened it, waiting for him to leave. He gave me a look, waiting for me to say something. I had nothing to say to him.
He walked out and got into my mom’s car, which pissed me off. I hated that he was using my parents. But there wasn’t much I could do about that. They would never see him for what he really was. My mother would never believe there were loan sharks chasing him down.
I closed the door and locked it. I could admit I was a little skittish. I wasn’t sure what the men were capable of and I certainly didn’t want to find out. I walked to the kitchen and put away the bank statements and closed my laptop. I was going fishing.
I grabbed my gear and headed for my truck, tossing the stuff in and driving to the convenience store first. I grabbed a six-pack and a bag of chips and headed out to my favorite spot. I unfolded my chair, settled in and opened a beer. I cast out my line, watching it drift over the water.
It was hard to believe my life had gone from great, to shit, to great, to shit, in a matter of days. That had to be some kind of record. I felt like I was in a tug-o-war with Dani.
It sucked. I wanted her. I had pushed her away again. I didn’t think I’d be getting a third chance. I knew I couldn’t blame her for what happened. She didn’t know. She couldn’t have known.
I knew I had probably been brusque with her. That seemed to be a trend when it came to her. I had never been so quick to anger with anyone else. She brought out the best and the worst in me. I was passionate when I was with her—in every way. She unhinged me. I had to apologize. I was sure I had pushed her away this time. I had to say I was sorry for the sake of keeping the peace between Philip and Jamie. I was sure there would be times in the future when Dani and I would be in the same room. I didn’t want it to be awkward. I didn’t want there to be tension. That wasn’t fair to Philip, Jamie or Sadie. I would do what I could to make it right, but I wasn’t expecting her to be thrilled with the idea of ever talking to me again.
Chapter 36
Dani
My kitchen was ready for surgery. I had scrubbed and bleached and cleaned every nook and cranny. I was confident it was just as sterile as any operating room. I had nothing better to do than clean. I had tried to call Clay twice. He didn’t answer and I wasn’t going to harass the man. I completely understood why he was upset with me. I knew he had a lot on his plate and I wasn’t going to add to it.
I couldn’t help but wonder what he was doing. Did he get the money? Was he packing up and planning on skipping town? Would his shop be burned to the ground tomorrow? The men had seemed serious. I hoped the worst they did was burn his shop down. I couldn’t imagine them actually hurting him. I had thought about taking the money from my own savings to pay the debt. I didn’t want to pay it for Emmitt’s sake, but for Clay’s. He didn’t deserve to lose everything because his brother was an asshole.
I dropped the load of laundry on the couch to begin folding when I heard a knock on my door. My first thought was it had to be Clay. I quickly ran my hands over the sides of my head. My hair had been in a messy bun that was now legitimately messy after the scrubbing in the kitchen.
