“Kenny!”
“Ha! Just like old times!” he yelled, blasting me again.
“Watch this, Sadie,” I said, bending down to retrieve her weapon as I mercilessly let Kenny have it. He hit the ground and tried to crawl away.
I stood over him and soaked him with the remaining water in the gun.
“I give up! I give up!” he yowled, and Sadie watched it all while laughing deep belly laughs.
“Mom, you’re silly.”
“She’s the worst!” Kenny yelled from his position on the ground.
“Hey, you want more?”
“Didn’t I tell you?” Kenny said raising himself up on his elbows, addressing Sadie.
“Tell her what?” I said, looking at him suspiciously.
“Your mom loves to beat me up.”
“Oh my gosh, we beat each other up. Don’t listen to him, Sadie.”
I helped Kenny up even though I wanted to push him back down, and together the three of us covered in dirt and water made our way inside Mom’s house.
“God, this place brings back so many memories. Remember how short we were and when we wanted to drink water from the faucet we had to put our feet on the vanity and lean over?”
I nodded. “We weren’t that much older than Sadie is now.”
“Those were the best of times.”
We placed Sadie in front of the television and made our way to the kitchen to talk.
“So, how is he?” Kenny asked, putting his hands in his pockets and looking at me anxiously.
“Stable… he’s stable. They want to run some tests, but the worst is over.”
“Do they know how it happened?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know, no one really talked to me.” I felt helpless and useless. I felt like a little girl, even though I was raising one of my own.
Kenny held out his arms and I stepped into them. He hugged me tight and rested his chin on top of my head.
“We’ll get through this together. He’ll be fine. You’ll see. He has all of us. He’ll be fine.”
I squeezed my eyes closed, hoping to God that Kenny was right.
And then I felt arms circling my waist and realized that Sadie had joined us in a group hug. I couldn’t help but laugh.
“You feel left out?”
She shrugged. “Maybe a little.”
I picked her up and hugged her tight. “You can head to the H-O-S-P-I-T-A-L. We’ll be ok,” I said to Kenny looking over my shoulder at him.
“You sure?”
“Positive.”
He ruffed up my hair and then Sadie’s and left.
“So… what should we do now?” I said to Sadie, so happy to be home even though the situation was less than ideal.
“Make brownies?”
“Yum yum, brownies. Sounds like a plan.”
I placed her down and thought again how wonderful it was to be home.
Four hours later, Sadie was taking a nap next to me on the couch. I was reading a book, or at least trying to. My focus was off and I found myself staring at the wall, worrying about Dad. I texted Kenny, but he hadn’t gotten back to me yet. I didn’t want to call Mom because I was sure she was busy with Dad.
I laid Sadie down on the couch and started cleaning. I needed to keep busy or else I would go insane. I heard a car pull up in my driveway and looked out the window, expecting to see Kenny, but it was Mom’s car.
She climbed out slowly, looking tired. I opened the door and waited on the porch for her. She climbed the steps looking weary and beat down.
She didn’t notice me standing there with the door open until she was almost on top of me. “Oh, wow… I didn’t even see you standing there.”
“You’re tired,” I said, stepping out of the way as she entered the house.
She collapsed on a chair in the sitting room and sighed. “Nina,” she said tiredly, “don’t get married. I swear your dad made me sprout seven new gray hairs today. And all on my chin. Don’t tell anyone that. My hairy secret goes to the grave, got it?”
“Got it,” I said with a small smile, happy that she could still joke at a time like this.
“How are you doing, Mom? How are you holding up?” I sat down in the little antique chair across from her.
“I’m doing ok. Your dad is driving me crazy. He’s the worst patient.”
“Yeah, I can imagine that. You know how cranky he gets when he’s sick.”
“Oh yeah, he hates being fawned over as he calls it. He slaps at the nurses’ hands, tells off the doctors. He’s just a handful.”
“That’s Daddy for you.”
She smiled. “He’s going to be fine. It’s my reputation at the hospital that I’ll have to worry about. They might all hate me just by association.”
“Guilty by association.”
“Yeah, your dad is getting quite the reputation and dragging me down with him,” she laughed.
“So, he’s going to be alright?”
“Yep. He might need a few physical therapy sessions, but otherwise he’ll be fine. I’ll have to change his diet.”
“Oh nooo!”
“That’s what he said. No more steaks and potatoes. Veggies and fish from now on.”
“He’s going to have to cancel all his outdoor parties.”
My dad planned outdoor parties every summer and invited nearly everyone in the neighborhood and everyone who visited the neighborhood. One year the postman had shown up, the FedEx driver and the man who maintained some of the local yards.
“I’m glad he’s going to be alright. I’m also glad I’m home.”
“Speaking of which, I’m sorry, I just panicked. I should have waited to call you. I’m a doctor yet I panicked!” she said with disbelief in her voice.
“Well, for the first time it was you who was the family of the patient. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
“Did you lose your job because of me?”
I shook my head. “We were done filming.” She paused and I could easily guess what was coming next. “So did you talk to him?”
I didn’t play coy. I knew who she was talking about.
“Yep.”
“And?”
“It didn’t go well. His mother showed up and pretty much made sure that he thought the worst of me… not to mention his sister had a daughter and never told the father. And he, of course, resents his sister for that.”
“Yikes.”
“Yeah, so he’s not too thrilled about me now.”
Mom sighed. “So, what happens now?”
“I put all this behind me and try to be the best mom I can be despite the circumstances.”
She nodded, her eyes showing me without words how proud of me she was. “You’re resilient, Nina, whether you give yourself credit or not. When the going gets tough, you don’t just buckle under pressure. Sadie’s lucky that you’re her mom.”
I teared up a little and swiped at my eyes. “You’re going to make me cry!”
She waved her hands in the air and said, “Sorry… this family has done enough crying these past few days. Come on, let’s go make some brownies.”
“You sound like your granddaughter.”
“Well, that little girl has a good head on her shoulders, courtesy of her grandma.”
We laughed and headed into the kitchen, grateful beyond words that Dad would be fine.
*
The next day I woke up in my own bed and stretched. It wasn’t a king size bed like Griffin’s, but it was cheap and comfortable. At the time when I bought it, those had been my only requirements.
I rolled over and found Sadie right next to me. She was wide awake playing with her wooden alphabets. She was lining them up in order and practicing the sounds that each letter made. In between each sound, she sang a little song.
She was just as smart as she was adorable. I sat up and pointed to one of the letters, letting out a big yawn.
“What letter is that?” I said after I was done yawning.
“B!” she said excitedly.<
br />
“And what sound does it make?”
“Buh—buh-buh,” she said.
“Good job, and what words start with B?”
She stared at the letter and then said, “Bus… baby… balloon.”
I held my hand out. “High-five! Good job!”
She gave me a high-five and continued organizing her letters.
I heard a noise from elsewhere in the house and then I instantly relaxed. I had forgotten for a moment that Kenny was still staying with us.
“Let’s go get breakfast.”
“I ate eggs. And toast. Already,” she said not looking up.
Of course, Kenny had cooked. He just loved making me look bad, I thought sourly.
It was then that I could smell hints of spices coming from the kitchen. I left Sadie playing and ventured to the kitchen.
Bacon. Eggs. Pork chops smothered in gravy. Grits and biscuits. There were even sausages.
“Kenny, what’s up with this feast?”
“Happiness,” came a voice from behind me and I let out a surprised shriek. I turned around and saw a familiar face. I hugged him instantly.
“Cyril! It’s so good to see you! What are you doing here?”
“When Kenny didn’t answer his phone I knew something must be wrong. You know how he’s always attached to it. Anyway, so when I finally reached him I knew he couldn’t handle this alone, so I flew in.”
“That’s so sweet,” I said.
“I know. I’m a sweet guy,” Cyril said, and I couldn’t suppress my smile.
“Where’s Kenny now?”
“He said he had to go to town for something. He’ll be back.”
I was helping myself to a second helping of eggs and Sadie was chowing down on a muffin when Kenny’s car pulled up.
He got out and the expression on his face looked guilty. Confused, I stood up and walked towards the window. And then another car pulled up right behind him. I didn’t recognize it.
“Who’s that?” Cyril asked.
I shrugged. “I’m not expecting any visitors.”
The car stopped right next to Kenny’s and Kenny patiently waited for whoever it was to get out.
My fists balled up and my heart rate picked up when I saw who had dared come to my house.
“Who’s the good looking dude?” Cyril inquired standing next to me peering out the window.
“Griffin…”
“Sadie’s fath—”
I sent him a look, not wanting Sadie to overhear.
“Sadie, why don’t you go play dolls with Cyril? You can show him your doll house.”
“Ok,” she said. “Come on. It’s awesome.”
“I had a doll house when I was your age,” I could hear him say as they disappeared down the hall.
I wiped my face and opened the front door. Kenny looked at me guiltily as I came out onto the porch.
“It’s not my fault,” were the first words out of his mouth.
“I don’t want to hear it. Go inside, Kenny.”
He looked at me and then at Griffin, and then shrugged his shoulders and did as he was told.
“What are you doing here, Griffin?”
“I wanted to see you.”
“Really? I find that hard to believe.”
“I’m sorry for how I handled things. I messed up. I want to talk.”
“It’s too late for that,” I said, turning around, ready to go back into the house.
It was then that I saw Sadie standing there, staring at us through the window.
He noticed her too and stared, anchored to that spot. I pushed at him. “Get in your car now. Let’s go.”
He finally woke up out of his brief moment of shock and got in the car. I climbed in next to him and said curtly, “Drive.”
“Where?”
“Just drive!” I shouted. I was a ball of nerves and I knew I was being irrational. Griffin didn’t know where to go in town. He wasn’t from here.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said softly.
“She’s the spitting image of my little sister,” he said after a while. “We don’t even have the same father, but she looks just like Nora.”
I didn’t comment. I was too busy texting Kenny to keep an eye on Sadie.
He texted back, “I already have that covered. Good luck!”
I sat back and rested my head against the headrest. And then I abruptly sat up. “What the hell was that all about, Griffin? What the hell were you thinking showing up like that?” I was close to shouting, but managed to keep my voice down. It was a struggle to say the least.
“Yeah, I messed up.”
“How did you know where I was? Or where I lived?”
“That part was easy. Richard gave me your address.”
“Richard is terrible with confidentiality.”
“Yeah, you can’t trust him.”
“No kidding.”
“Anyway, he gave me your address, but I was still having trouble finding you so I stopped in town and ran into Kenny at the grocery store when I stopped to ask for directions.”
“And of course he led you to me.”
“Well, he tried to pretend that he didn’t see me. He hid behind his jacket and tried to sneak out, which made him even more noticeable… so don’t be too mad at him.”
The image he conjured of Kenny sneaking around trying to look inconspicuous would have made me laugh on a normal day. Today wasn’t a normal day.
“I’m going to be honest with you, I’m too emotionally spent to talk to you right now. My dad is in the hospital, my mom needs me. I don’t have the luxury of playing house with you right now.”
He winced. “What happened to your dad?”
“He had a stroke. I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Is he okay?”
“I said I don’t want to talk about it.” It came out more forcefully than I’d intended.
“Ok…”
We drove in silence and finally I gave in. “He’s going to be fine. He’ll just need physical therapy and a diet change.”
“Yikes.”
“That’s what I said. The man loves pork chops smothered in gravy.”
“Well, for what it’s worth, I’m glad he’s going to be alright. I know how much you love him.” He glanced at me and said, “Should I just keep driving in circles?”
“I don’t know.” Suddenly I realized that I honestly didn’t know. I didn’t know what was next for my dad or my mom. I didn’t know what was next for Kenny and Cyril. And I didn’t know what was next for me and Sadie. So maybe I had to deal with the here and now… which meant dealing with Griffin.
“I know that we need to talk.”
“Yeah, we do. Is there any place private we can go?”
I thought about what would be open at this time of morning and would also give us at least a little privacy. “The mall?”
Not the most romantic spot, I thought, and then admonished myself. We didn’t need romantic, we needed practical. The mall would be just fine. I gave him directions all the while wondering just how exactly Griffin’s trip would play out. And I also wondered how many ways his sudden presence here would change not only my life, but Sadie’s as well.
Chapter 12
Our local mall had recently been renovated and an addition of a large outdoor entertainment area had been added. The outdoor area was considered fancy for our town and was dotted with small, pretty water fountains and several lounge areas which faced a huge flat screen TV that sat about 20 feet high on one outer wall. The lawn was used to host various classes from yoga to toddler’s story time. And as I predicted, no one was there. We had the entire lawn to ourselves. I took off my shoes, enjoying the grass between my toes, and took a deep breath of early morning air. Any other day, I would have been enjoying a brisk walk around the neighborhood with Sadie at my side, riding along on her tricycle, but today clearly wasn’t an average morning… at least not in my life.
I sat down on the grass and folded my legs under me. Gr
iffin sat down next to me. I shifted away from him, needing room for what I was about to say. I knew his nearness distracted me and I had too much to get off my chest to risk being distracted.
He cleared his throat and looked down at me. His dark brown eyes were studying me earnestly.
He reached out to touch my face and I pushed his hand away. He didn’t seem surprised, but hurt nonetheless. He sighed. “Where should we start? I keep screwing this up, so why don’t you start?”
I thought that was a brilliant idea. So, I led with a simple question: “Why are you here?”
“I messed up. Simple as that and I want the opportunity to make it up to you… and to our daughter.”
“So, you want to be a part of her life?”
He nodded. “But I want more than that, I want both of you to be a part of my life.”
“I’m not sure if that’s such a good idea,” I said, not looking away from him. In the past, I would have looked away, afraid to face him, but not today.
“If you give me a chance—”
“Why should I?”
“I know I can make you happy if you let me.”
I frowned. “I’m not unhappy. And I hope you’re not arrogant enough to think my happiness depends on you.”
He rubbed at his face in frustration. “I’m screwing this up big time.” He reached for my hands and this time I let him hold them. I looked at him and realized this conversation was probably really hard for him, and I bet for the most part things usually came easy for him. I wasn’t going to make this easy.
“I just want to be a part of your life and our daughter’s life. You can decide what that entails. I’m not going to push you into doing something you’d rather not do. I’m not going to rush you to make a decision. I understand that right now you’re probably not feeling that charitable towards me—”
“You got that right.”
“But, I want to get to know her… and it would be a privilege if you’d allow me to do so.”
“Nice speech,” I said, pulling my hands away. “But flowery words that you probably thought up while on the plane ride here doesn’t make up for the fact I’ve been mistreated by you and your family, specifically your mother.”
He opened his mouth to interrupt and I held up my hand to silence him. “Let me say what I have to say.”
He looked ready to argue again and I shot him a warning glance. “Let me say what I have to say or you can get back on a plane to L.A.”
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