He was missing his wife. It was supposed to get easier without her—it hadn’t.
Amos headed up the side steps and he pushed the screen door open. He could see Thomas and Patience at the kitchen table with an Englisher woman who looked to be in her forties. As he came all the way in, he spotted Rue sitting cross-legged on the floor with a toddler next to her. The little boy held a blanket that appeared to have a cartoon mouse on the front of it—very un-Amish. Rue reached forward and smoothed a hand down his hair lovingly. The little boy leaned toward her, and Rue wrapped her thin arms around him tenderly. Amos couldn’t help but smile.
That little boy had just found the most loving home imaginable, and he had no idea yet how blessed he was.
“Amos, you made it!” Thomas said. “Come in, come in.”
Amos glanced around. The adoption agent, deep in conversation with Patience, was a middle-aged woman wearing a pantsuit. She was plump and looked pleasant enough.
“I feel like I misunderstood an invitation?” Amos said uncertainly.
“Not at all,” Patience said, looking up. “We invited you purposefully. That’s Cruise, over there, getting to know his new sister.”
Amos smiled wistfully. “He’s really cute.”
“He’s got a Mickey Mouse blanket!” Rue said. “He loves it a lot.”
“And he will keep it for as long as he wants,” Thomas said, perhaps a little more firmly than necessary. “We’re just so glad to bring him into our family. Rue seems to be his favorite so far.”
“That’s a wonderful sign actually,” the Englisher woman said. “Oftentimes, the sibling relationships can be the toughest. I’m glad your daughter is so open to having a little brother.”
“Oh, I was praying for a brother,” Rue said with a wide smile. “And sometimes Gott doesn’t give you the one you think you’ll get. Sometimes he’s got a brother waiting somewhere else. And Cruise is wonderful.”
Cruise—a very un-Amish name, too, but no one in this room seemed to mind a bit, least of all Amos. Thomas was getting a son tonight, and Amos’s heart was full of joy on his behalf.
“This is Nancy Cross,” Patience said, pulling his attention back. “She’s an adoption agent. When we talked to her last time, she had mentioned a rather special situation, and we thought of you right away.”
Patience’s gaze moved toward Cruise on the floor. She slipped away from the table and went over to where the kinner were playing. As she crouched down next to them, she ran a protective hand over the toddler’s wispy blond hair.
“You thought of me?” Amos pulled up a chair and sank into it.
“I’ll just let Nancy explain,” Thomas said.
“Hello, Mr. Lapp,” the woman said with a warm smile. She offered him her hand, and he shook it.
“Just Amos is fine,” Amos said. “Nice to meet you.”
“Likewise,” Nancy said. “When we were doing our adoption interview, Thomas told us about how you took him and his brother into your home and raised them like they were your own. It was a really touching story, and I was moved, truly.”
Amos smiled awkwardly. “I was more than happy to do it.”
“Well, I wanted to tell you a story about four boys,” Nancy said, pulling out a file folder and removing some color school photos. “This is Michael, Jack, Vince and Colby. Their parents were killed in a car accident six months ago, and boys this age can be hard to place separately, let alone together. These brothers need a stable home and they need to stay together. They were raised Mennonite, but they don’t have any extended family to take them in. They’re in different foster homes right now, and it’s stressful for them.”
Amos looked down at the last photo of the boys together. The tallest boy looked like he might shave already. The younger boys all looked similar—the same curls and big, brown eyes.
“That was taken just before they went into foster care,” Nancy added.
It was the sadness in their faces that tugged at him the most. He looked over to where Patience crouched next to Rue. She held her arms out to Cruise, but the toddler leaned toward Rue instead. She let her hands drop, but her face showed that she had the ability to wait and win the little boy over. She sank down all the way onto the floor, tucking her legs underneath her.
“And you want me to be their new home,” Amos surmised.
“Well, sir,” Nancy said. “We were hoping you’d consider it. It takes a really special person to be able to raise boys well, to love them, to make them feel secure. And these boys need that badly. I don’t mean to pressure you in any way. I just wanted to let you think it over.”
Four boys who needed a daet and a home... The last time he’d done this, he’d had Mammi to help him out, to be the woman in the home, to cook the meals and mend the clothes...
“It’s a big responsibility,” he agreed.
“This is my card,” Nancy said, passing it over and rising to her feet. “If you are interested, please give me a call. But again, no pressure.”
“Yah. I’ll think it over...” He put his finger on the photo. “Could I keep that?”
He shouldn’t. The Amish didn’t have photos in their homes, but somehow he wondered if Gott would forgive him this little lapse... It was a very unique circumstance.
Nancy smiled. “Absolutely. You can keep all of the photos if you like—”
“No, just one.” He pulled the photo closer and then gave her a smile. “I’ll pray on it.”
Nancy said her goodbyes, shook hands with Thomas and Patience and then she took her leave. Amos stood up then, too.
“I’ll let you have some privacy as a little family,” Amos said.
“You’re part of the family,” Thomas said. “And you’ve got another grandson.”
“I couldn’t be happier,” Amos said, and he leaned in and gave Thomas a hug and a slap on the back.
“Let me help you with your buggy,” Thomas said.
The two men went outside together. The sun was starting to set, but it was still light enough to be able to be able to work without a lantern.
“What do you think?” Thomas asked.
“About the boys?” Amos sucked in a slow breath. “I don’t have Mammi here to help me out anymore. It wouldn’t be quite the same.”
“You’ve got all of us, though,” Thomas said. “And you’re not half-bad in the kitchen, you know.”
Amos smiled sadly. “Yah...”
They brought the horse out to the buggy, and as the men hitched him back up, Amos looked toward the house. The kerosene lamp light inside made it so that he could see Patience in the window. She was standing and holding Cruise in her arms now. She smiled tenderly at him, and he stared at her, wide-eyed.
“Your wife is a wonderful woman,” Amos said quietly. “Gott blessed you with her.”
“Yah,” Thomas agreed. “She makes me a better man, too. I don’t know if you remember, but when Rue came to live with me, I took away her suitcase of Englisher clothes, and I just about broke her heart. With this little boy, we knew he had an Englisher name, and Patience warned me that he’d come with his own little treasures that comforted him. It was Patience who told me that he needed to keep his name and his treasures.”
“You won’t change his name?” Amos asked.
“No.” Thomas shook his head. “His name was a gift from his biological mother, and we won’t take that away. He’ll be Cruise Wiebe, an Amish boy with a strange name, but we’ll give him a middle name, though. I was thinking Amos would be nice.”
“Really?” Amos looked at Thomas, stunned. “After me?”
“You’re the father who taught me how to be an adoptive daet,” Thomas said, and he dropped his gaze, rubbing a hand over his reddish beard.
“I’m honored,” Amos murmured.
He looked down at the picture of the boys in his hand. “Did Patie
nce really change you that much?”
“Yah...” Thomas shrugged. “But that’s marriage, isn’t it? We all become more flexible, and we’re better for it.” Thomas seemed to realize what he’d said, and he shot him an apologetic look. “I didn’t mean—”
“No, no,” Amos said. “It’s fine.”
“The thing is, I was a good man before her,” Thomas said. “But I’m a better father with her...if that makes sense.”
It did make sense. Because looking down at the photo of four boys so desperately in need of a home, Amos was sorely tempted to take them in. But he wasn’t imagining doing this by himself anymore. In his mind’s eye, Miriam was at his side, and they were raising a houseful of boys together.
He missed her desperately, but a life with Miriam would involve some considerable change on his part. He’d have to accept her influence in his home and in his business. And he had a feeling that Miriam could make him into a better version of himself, too, if he’d just be willing to let her past his defenses. Thomas was a better man with Patience, and a better father. And Miriam could do the same for him. He wasn’t going to be so stubborn as to claim he couldn’t improve.
Was he really considering this?
“You just made up your mind, didn’t you?” Thomas said, eyeing him with a small smile.
“Yah.” Amos shot Thomas a grin. “But it begins with a trip to Edson first thing in the morning.”
Thomas’s smile broadened. “I’ll be praying you come home with Miriam.”
“I need all the prayer I can get, Thomas,” Amos said. “Now let me get home. You go on in to your family.”
* * *
Miriam stood outside her strip mall with a pad of paper in one hand as she jotted down notes of things that needed to be improved over the next several months. One shop—a florist—had a water leak that hadn’t been reported, and that would be a more expensive fix. She’d already had some firm words with the owner of the business about reporting these things promptly or having his lease canceled.
She didn’t need her brother’s help in delivering that kind of reprimand, and the leasees would simply have to get used to reporting to her. According to her records, they hadn’t raised lease prices in the last five years, so she would revisit those numbers, but she didn’t want to be unfair to the businesses there, either. She’d have to look at all the details first.
“Ma’am?” The florist came out of his shop, and he shot her an uncomfortable look. “I want to apologize for my attitude before. I shouldn’t have argued with you, and I can promise that I’ll be checking those hoses from now on.”
“Thank you,” Miriam said, and she softened her tone. “I appreciate that. We have a cell phone for emergency calls, so please only use it then. You can leave a message and we’ll get the right people in to fix things like water leaks. Those can’t be left.”
“Right.” The man nodded. “I’ll do that.”
He headed back into his shop, and she smiled faintly. She’d been called “ma’am.” She liked the sound of it—even if it was rather fancy. Then her smile slipped. There was something Amos had said... Do you want to live in a house with your brother, and have a sprawling network of businesses that call you “ma’am” like some Englisher woman?
She’d have these people’s respect, and within a matter of months, she’d have them giving her the same deference they’d given her father... She might have to find a little home to live in alone, though, if her sister-in-law didn’t like the current arrangement. Japheth and Arleta would need a family home to themselves. Marriages oftentimes needed a bit of space... That was ironic, because her marriage seemed to need more than most!
“Whoa...”
Miriam looked up as her brother reined in his buggy, but she froze when she saw who was with him.
“Amos?” she breathed.
Her husband was already rising to his feet as the buggy came to a stop, and Amos jumped down and gave Japheth a nod of thanks, then he turned his drilling gaze onto her. Miriam smoothed her hands down the front of her dress.
“What are you doing here?” Miriam asked, and her voice trembled just a little more than she wanted it to.
Amos crossed the distance between them, and it was like everything around them disappeared.
“I missed you,” he said softly.
“So you came to visit?” she asked feebly. Were they going to include this in their relationship now, too? Somehow, she couldn’t complain.
“Not exactly,” he said, and he caught her hand in his. She squeezed his fingers just as tightly in return. “I came to ask you to come home...”
Miriam blinked at him, and her gaze flickered over to where her brother still sat in the buggy, trying to pretend he wasn’t watching.
“Did my brother ask you to do this?” she asked falteringly. “Because—”
“This is me,” Amos said quietly. “I showed up at the house looking for you, and your brother said he’d give me a ride to find you.”
“Oh...” she said faintly.
“Miriam, I love you,” he said. “And I know you love me. I’ve been a fool. I wanted you to be someone else—to be meeker and quieter and less of everything that you are. But that was wrong. You’re intelligent, and beautiful, and I want you to come home and be a part of everything.”
“What?” She squinted up at him. “Amos, you can’t mean that.”
“Why not?” he asked.
“Because I drive you crazy!”
“Yah, sometimes.” A smile flickered at the corners of his lips. “But I need you. I need your help, and I think Gott is showing me just how much I need it.”
“What changed?” she whispered.
“I missed you so much my whole chest hurt,” he said. “I went to bed at night and missed you. I went to work and I missed you. I tried to pray and I missed you... I was starting to get the message that I needed you back at home with me, because I don’t think getting over you is even an option.” He swallowed, and his gaze met hers. “And then I got the chance to fill my home with kinner...”
“What?” she breathed.
“It’s a little sudden,” he said. “But in my experience, the best things seem to be.”
He pulled out a photograph of four boys, and she looked at those sad faces and her heart nearly broke. They needed a mother...
“They need a home, and I’ve been asked if I would adopt them,” Amos said. “I’ve got a bit of a track record with older kids because of Thomas and Noah. And, well... Thomas and Patience are adopting a little boy, and they heard about these kinner.”
“You want to raise them?” she asked. “Is that what you’re saying? You want to adopt these boys?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. It would be a big job,” he said. “They aren’t Amish born, these boys. But I don’t know... I look at those faces, and I think that I could offer them something—stability, faith, a real home. And for me...for us...it would be a chance at a house full of love and laughter.”
“I’ll still drive you crazy,” she said, shaking her head. “I’d still want to know about the business, and want to grow it in spite of you.”
“Good.” He nodded earnestly. “Good! Miriam, I’ll need all your energy, and intuition, and business sense. Because if you and I adopt these boys, they’ll take up a lot of time and dedication. If you’d be a wife to me, and a mamm to them, and...a manager at the shop...”
Miriam felt tears well in her eyes.
“Really?”
“Thomas said something that made me think. You have to bend for a wife. And the right woman can make you a better man.”
Miriam was silent, and she fingered the photo of the boys. Her heart was already reaching toward them, and she sent up a prayer.
Gott, is this Your will? Can I go home now?
“You haven’t contacted anyone about the
radio ad, have you?” she asked with a teary smile.
“Not yet,” Amos admitted. “I’m not great with that stuff. But you and I together, Miriam, we could do this... If you wanted to.”
“I’ve missed you,” she whispered.
Amos bent down and covered her lips with his. His kiss was soft and enveloping. When he finally pulled back, he murmured, “Come home with me...”
She nodded. “I’ll have to help my brother a little bit, though.”
“I’ll be willing to share your expertise, Miriam,” Japheth called from the buggy, and she laughed softly at her brother’s grin. Had he heard all of that?
“Yah, Amos,” Miriam said, looking up into her husband’s hopeful face. “I’ll come home with you, and I’ll be a wife to you, and we’ll adopt those boys together.”
Because it felt right. In her heart, she could feel Gott’s smile on this.
She’d be a mamm... It hardly seemed real, and as she looked down at the photo again, she felt her heart open just a little bit wider. Yes, she’d be a mamm!
Amos slid an arm around her, and she tipped her head onto his shoulder. She knew exactly where her home was, and it wasn’t here in Edson any longer—it was wherever her husband happened to be.
Mammi had been right, after all, it seemed. Gott had been working.
Epilogue
On a chilly morning in September, when the leaves were just starting to turn yellow on the trees outside, when the mornings were getting cooler, and the garden was turning brown outside the kitchen window, Miriam tucked a package of banana bread into the last lunch bag and handed it to Michael. He was the oldest, and he stood there—broad shoulders, a dusting of a mustache on his upper lip. Michael had been the hardest to reach the last couple of months. He’d been so quiet and stoic...almost like there was Amish inside of him, after all.
Wife on His Doorstep Page 17
