“To get your mind off things,” she whispers at first before her words get louder. “And then you decided that I looked naïve enough and stupid enough that you could just use me to cheat on your wife with and I’d never find out. I mean, how could I, right? You left me at that hotel room without another word.”
“Morgan.” I close my eyes briefly, hoping to gather myself because I swear I’ve never cried before but the pain in her eyes right now makes me feel like I just might. “Please don’t say that. I didn’t use you. I—”
“You used me. You used me to feel better about yourself,” she says. “You used me in order to prove to yourself that you could still get a woman that wasn’t your wife. Tell me that wasn’t the case, Bennett. Tell me you were there just to have a drink.”
“I was there just to have a drink and then I met you and that changed.”
“You weren’t even wearing a wedding ring.” She watches me for a moment before shaking her head. “You disgust me. If this is the kind of thing you do whenever you feel wronged by someone, I want no part of this. I refuse to be the other woman or the rebound. I just . . . I can’t. Please leave.”
Before I can plead with her, she slams the door in my face. I stand stock-still for a moment, looking at the door as if maybe staring at it will call her to open it again. When she doesn’t, I look at the flowers in my hand and sigh. Instead of taking them with me, I lay them over the little welcome mat she has outside her door. She’ll probably toss them, but I don’t care. I didn’t come here with any expectations.
Chapter Forty-One
Bennett
“Oh, fun, another person heartbroken and moping. These are exactly the kinds of people we should be hanging out with a few weeks before our wedding.”
I look up to see Devon and Nora as they walk into my parents’ living room.
“You really do look like shit,” Nora says.
“How’s Morgan doing?” I ask, despite myself. I promised myself I’d give her space, despite the urge to go after her and grovel.
“Good,” Devon says. “Better than you.”
“She’s out and about,” Nora says. “Putting together my bachelorette and stuff, but she has been moping in between.”
“Fuck.” I groan, covering my face. “I forgot about the bachelor party.”
“It’s being taken care of,” Devon says. “We decided on a joint party.”
“What? And Morgan’s doing everything?” I stand up. “I should be helping out.”
“You really want to spend your Sunday hanging out with your ex-girlfriend?” Devon raises an eyebrow.
“More than anything.”
He chuckles. “You’re the exact opposite of just about everyone in the universe.”
“She hasn’t called me. I thought she’d call by now.”
“I told you I didn’t want to hear any of it.” Dev raises his hands. “We’re here to have lunch with your parents and thank them for letting us borrow their vacation home next week.”
“Even though it’ll be freezing and we won’t be able to enjoy the amenities,” I say. “Who decided on a winter wedding anyway?”
“I did.” Nora raises an eyebrow, daring me to say something else.
I sigh. “I guess we can still use the bowling alley and movie theatre.”
“And indoor, heated pool,” Devon adds, frowning. “I swear I think I go there more than you do.”
“You do.”
“That’s because your parents hated your ex-wife and never invited you when we went over,” Nora quips.
“Pretty sure it was the other way around. It was her who had her differences with them,” I respond. Not that it fucking matters. The fact that she’s still brought up in conversation is absolutely ridiculous. She’s ruining my life and she’s not even in it.
“Besides, the bipolar weather is saying it’ll be in the seventies next weekend.”
“In December?” I blink. “What is happening?”
“The world is ending,” Dev says, smiling. “Better get your shit together so you don’t die alone.”
“Fuck you.”
“Between you and me, I think you should let Morgan handle the bachelor/bachelorette party. Jamie and Presley are helping her with all of it. Give her space.”
“I’ve already given her space.”
“She’ll come to you when she’s ready.”
Devon walks away, toward the kitchen, where Mom is making croquetas and empanadas.
“What is she never comes back to me?”
“Then I guess it wasn’t meant to be.” Nora shrugs, smiling sadly.
“It was though. It is meant to be.”
“So, you wait.”
“I didn’t use her to cheat on my ex-wife, Nor,” I say. “I mean, technically I did, but it’s complicated.”
“I’m not here to judge, but you have to understand that Morgan’s been through a lot. A lot more than you can imagine.”
“Devon doesn’t even know the half of it.” I scowl.
“He does. His mom confessed a lot of things to him recently. To say he’s pissed off on his sister’s behalf is an understatement. She doesn’t know he knows, so don’t mention it to her. They both had fucked-up childhoods,” she says, “The only thing you and I can do is chill and wait for them to come around. They’ll let us know when they need us.”
“Fuck.” I run my fingers through my messy hair. “I hate waiting around like an idiot. I feel helpless.”
“What happened with Paola?”
“I put her in her place. Threatened to sue. Told her I’d get a restraining order if that’s what it’ll take to get her to back off.”
Her eyebrows raise. “I don’t remember her being this crazy in college.”
“I don’t either.” I bark out a laugh. “I mean, I married the girl. Obviously, I didn’t think she’d go through these lengths to get back at me. And for what? She cheated on me, got pregnant with another man’s child, and then told Morgan it was mine all along. She’s a damn liar. Why try to fuck with my life after all this time?”
“Maybe she’s bored. Women do crazy things when they’re bored.”
Her boredom is not my problem. I need to focus my attention on getting Morgan back.
Chapter Forty-Two
Morgan
“You really don’t think this dress is too short?” Jamie asks, plucking invisible lint off the electric-blue dress she’s wearing.
“Thank God the weather is amazing right now,” I say, looking at my own short dress in the mirror. “If the length of these dresses had a name, it would be called The Perfect Slut.”
Nora and her best friend, Tina, laugh. “If you ever need to switch gears from app development, I think you have a future in labels.”
“I never had an issue with short dresses before,” Jamie adds. “I seriously think the closer I get to thirty, the blander I become. It’s no wonder Travis is dating a younger version of me.”
“Oh, my God.” I groan. “Can we not talk about men and how much they suck tonight?”
“Well, yours will be there.” Presley raises an eyebrow.
“Thanks for the reminder,” I say. “But he’s not mine anymore.”
“Oh, sweetheart.” Tina squeezes my shoulder. “You’ll be all right. We’ll make sure of it.”
“Thanks.”
“I told you we could split the party and let them do their own thing,” Nora says.
“Nope. This was the original plan and we’re sticking to it. Fuck him and fuck men.”
“Oh, God. Tonight is going to be great,” Nora quips.
“It’ll be epic,” Jamie says, then cringes. “See? I even say words like epic now. Who even am I?”
Thirty minutes later, we’re on a party bus. I sandwich myself between Jamie and Tina, while Presley sits on Nate’s lap across from us and Nora sits on my brother’s beside them. Tina’s husband is meeting us later on in the evening, so at least from now until then, I’m safe. Devon’s friends are al
l sitting in the back, Bennett included. I made it very obvious that I don’t want to look at him at all and he seemed to get the memo, because he didn’t even try to say hi to me when I got on.
I promised myself I would be cordial.
I can totally do cordial.
I need at least two drinks in me before I get to that point, but I can totally do cordial.
With that thought, I take the vodka tonic that Jamie hands me and start bobbing my head to the beat as Tina bumps me and falls into the rhythm of “Tribe” by Bas and J. Cole. Soon, between the trifecta of my drink, my girls, and the music, I completely forget that he’s there at all.
The night is laid out like this: bar hopping, because that’s what Devon wanted to do, followed by a dance club, because that’s what Nora wanted to do. I reserved private areas in all the locations because of Devon and his friends. The last thing we need is for people to start snapping questionable pictures out of context that’ll end up on ESPN tomorrow.
“You’ve got to be kidding,” Jamie says, typing furiously on her phone. “They’re just now finishing up the set up at the first place.”
“That’s fine.” I shrug.
She meets my gaze. “We’ll be on their tails.”
“Who cares? I’m sure it looks perfect.” I look at the phone in her hand and see the pictures they’re sending as they come in. “That looks insane.”
“I should’ve just met you guys there.”
“Then you wouldn’t have any fun, James.”
“I’m worrying right now anyway. Might as well be worrying while I’m doing things.”
“Do me a favor, drink and shut up.”
I do the same and continue dancing in my seat. The guys sitting in the back are hollering and rapping along. One of them stands up and starts working the pole, which makes us all laugh.
“Jermaine doesn’t even drink,” Devon says loudly as he laughs and snaps a picture of his friend.
“Jermaine is hot as eff,” Jamie says quietly, to me. Not so quietly, being that Tina hears her and laughs.
“Jermaine is trouble,” she says.
“Aren’t they all,” I quip.
Tina laughs. Jamie sighs. The three of us take another sip.
Jamie and I lead the line to the bar and confirm with the guy up front that we do indeed have a space reserved in a private area. He pushes a button on his earpiece, relays the message, and tells us to take the side door. We head that way and are greeted by a staff of three, who lead us to a large room that’s decorated to the nines with rose-colored balloons, beer buckets, and Champagne. There’s a bar in the middle with a guy behind it. I turn to one of the women who works here.
“This is only for us, right?”
“Yes. The bar is included in the price.”
I lift my eyebrows and look at Jamie. “This is not amateur shit.”
Jamie laughs and gives me a fist bump.
“This is incredible,” Nora says as she walks up to us.
“Really? Do you love it?” Jamie asks.
“We figured we’d start off with a softer theme,” I add.
“I absolutely love it and can’t wait to see what else you have in store, but honestly? I’d stay here all night.” She winks at us and walks back to the rest of the group.
“Wouldn’t that have made our lives easier,” I say.
Jamie nods. “Let’s go get drinks.”
I don’t know how it happens, but I end up directly behind Bennett as we walk into the last bar before finally going to the club. I’ve been able to avoid him all night, save for a few stolen glances here and there, but suddenly here he is, a brick wall in jeans and a nice suit jacket walking in front of me. He smells so fucking good, it takes everything in me to not lean forward and inhale him. He’s a liar and a cheater, I remind myself, and that’s all it takes to sour my mood all over again, but only for a second. I quickly remind myself where I am and what I’m celebrating and hold my head high as I walk through the door.
“Morgan,” Jamie calls out from the front of the line.
“Excuse me,” I say, trying to brush past Bennett.
“You were behind me the whole time?”
I nod once, hold my head high and walk forward to where Jamie is. She holds my hand as we walk into the private area that looks similar to the first, with its own bar and plenty of seating. The group has gotten bigger now, more of Devon’s friends and colleagues joining in. He introduces me to a new one every so often and continuously checks up on me, which makes me wonder if my discomfort is beginning to show or if he’s just being the overprotective brother he usually is in these settings. It’s when he’s holding my hand in one of his and Nora’s in the other as he’s thanking everyone for coming that it starts to really hit me that he’s getting married.
I absolutely adore Nora. She’s become my sister and family, but hearing him say how thankful he is to be starting a new family with the love of his life hits me square in the chest. A new family. It’s one-hundred-percent the alcohol getting to my head that makes me look up at him and wonder what’ll happen to me. What’ll happen when they start having children and create their own little nucleus? Will we still see each other this often? Will we still talk every day? Will they have time? One thing taking my mother to the rehab center showed me was that I really don’t have many people in this world. Devon and Nora are the extent of my family. Somehow, I make it through Devon’s speech with a smile on my face, but the minute people start clapping and he lets go of my hand to kiss Nora, I feel like I’m going to lose it. I wait until he gives me a hug, and then Nora gives me one before shooting like a bat out of hell in search of the bathroom.
Once I find one, I lock myself in a stall and take a deep breath. I need water. Like a gallon or two. The main bathroom door opens and closes. I look down and see men’s dress shoes—dark caramel-brown and a hem of dark-washed jeans.
“Go away, Ben.”
“I’m done giving you space.”
“Oh, that’s funny, I don’t remember asking you.” I unlock the stall door and open it. “Seriously, go away.”
“What’s wrong?” His brows pull together as he steps forward. I move to close the door again and he stops walking toward me. “This is killing me, Morgan.”
“Which part?”
“All of it. I hate not seeing you. I hate not talking to you. I hate not hearing your laugh or the ease in which you insult the fuck out of people without a care in the world.”
I laugh. “I don’t insult people.”
“Maybe just me, then?” He smiles. “But it’s okay. I like it.”
“This isn’t going to work. You lied to me in the worst way.”
“I didn’t lie to you.”
I shoot him a look. “So you weren’t married the first time we hooked up?”
“I was.”
“Okay, so you lied.”
“If you want to get technical, I lied.”
I blink. “A lie is a lie. Jesus Christ. Do you just go around lying to people and then coming up with ways to justify it?”
“No.”
“Only me, then?” I cross my arms over my chest. “Either way, it doesn’t matter. It’s over. I’m done. The last time a guy started lying to me, he ended up fucking my mother.”
“Don’t put me in a box with that asshole.”
“You put yourself there.” I uncross my arms and walk over to the sink, washing my hands and drying them quickly.
“I already told you this, but it bears repeating. She’d already been cheating on me. I met you the night she told me about the pregnancy. We were done. I was done. There was nothing she could’ve said or done at that point to get me back. And then I met you and it was your birthday and you were all alone, yet you said I was lonely.”
“You were.” I toss the paper towel into the trash can as I pivot to face him. “You still are.”
“I haven’t been lonely since the day you walked into my father’s office.”
I roll my
eyes. “Okay, Romeo.”
“I’m serious, Morgan. When you’re with me, I feel light. I haven’t felt light in years,” he says. The way he says it, with the serious tone and those sincere eyes, almost makes me want to believe him. “Years.”
“I guess you’ll need to find your light elsewhere, because I’m not going to let you drain mine.”
With that, I walk out. My chest physically hurts as I head back over to the party, but I keep a smile on my face through it. I’ve been hurt before and I survived.
The club is loud. That’s a good thing because it means no one can talk to me. It’s a bad thing because it means I can’t talk to anyone either. Tina’s husband got here, so my partner in dancing is gone. Jamie has been talking to one of my brother’s friends for the past thirty minutes. Everyone else seems to be dancing, drinking, and generally having a good time. Bennett is drinking and watching me with every sip he takes. I’m not going to lie, if things hadn’t gone south between us, I’d be standing between his muscular legs right now. Alas, men fucking suck. I’m about to pull my phone out when my brother comes up to me.
“You’re moping. No fucking moping at my bachelor party.”
“I’m at Nora’s bachelorette.” I grin up at him.
“I’m not kidding.” He hands me the drink in his hand. “Come dance. Or go find a random guy to dance with. That’s your usual move.”
I laugh and stand carefully, making sure not to flash anyone. Maybe Jamie was on to something with the short dress thing. I join him, Nora, and some other guys on the dance floor. Jamie and the guy she’s been talking to walk over and join in beside me. We’re moving and laughing and singing along to the music, throwing our hands up, and for a split second I wish so badly Bennett’s arms were around me, moving along with me. I glance over to where he’s standing and see one of Nora’s friends, April, talking to him. She’s been tipsy most of the night, and with the way she’s looking at him I can only imagine what she’s offering.
The Trouble With Love Page 19
