by Jo Raven
My hand with the remote is shaking harder. Feeling stupid, I put it down. “You know about me?”
“Of course I know about you. Kaden has been moping and getting shitfaced in your name day after day since you left.”
Whoa, okay. Not sure how I feel about that.
Worried. Happy.
Okay, mainly happy, and what does that say about me?
“Sorry,” the stranger says, “where are my manners? I’m Jared. Next door neighbor.”
And he approaches me and gives me his hand to shake, as if I hadn’t just pointed a remote at him.
I shake it. His grip is firm and warm. “Hailey.”
“The girl who left.” He nods as if finally understanding something.
I wish I could say the same.
“So you’re Kaden’s neighbor…and have a key to his apartment.” Not that it stings he never gave me one during the time we were together… Yeah, I’m lying. “Is that normal? Like a bromance thing?”
“A what?” He frowns and perches his ass on the armrest of the sofa, crossing his hands on his knee. Like a supermodel posing for a photo.
Hm. He is pretty photogenic. Pretty all around. Trust Kaden to have neighbors who look like old time cinema stars.
“Bromance. Boy romance. Like a bro thing. Uh…”
He’s still frowning. “I’m his neighbor, and someone has to keep an eye on the guy. He’s a walking disaster. Can’t boil an egg to save his life, can’t even bother to take out his trash or shower. Thing is…” Those hazel eyes narrow on me. “He wasn’t always this bad. Only in the past couple of months.”
“Since I left.” Gee I am a genius.
“Since you left,” he agrees and smiles, as if congratulating me on my being such a genius. “He says he misses you.”
“But…” I glance at the bedroom door behind which Kaden is probably lying in bed, and now I’m trying hard not to think about the fact he’s naked under the sheets, and how I could climb into bed with him and play with him… Maybe wake him up with a blowjob? He’d love that.
“But what?”
I shake my head. “It’s complicated.”
Proof is that I’m talking about it with a guy I’ve never met before in my life. A guy who has been taking care of Kaden, who knows about me and seems to be saying that Kaden was – is – all broken up about me leaving.
One more person Kaden has told about me, but what does it change?
Nothing.
“Talk to him,” Jared says, that shrewd gaze never leaving me. It’s like a snake’s gaze, mesmerizing and dangerous. “Whatever happened between you, talk to him, Hailey Who Left. Maybe there was a misunderstanding. Maybe you can save what you have, and trust me, finding true love isn’t something you want to throw away.”
“None of your business,” I whisper, a bit choked up, because that’s exactly the doubt that has been eating at me all this time.
What if there’s an explanation for the pictures and text messages on his phone?
An explanation for everything?
“You know.” Jared leans back a little, folding his hands together on top of his thigh, and stares at me from under his dark lashes. “Women have been throwing themselves at Kaden, every single day since you left. Probably every single day of his life.”
“Screw you.” I sputter, getting up and then grabbing at my towel when it starts slipping.
“No, thanks. What I was trying to say is that he’s had every opportunity to bang other women. Before you, while he was with you, and especially after you were gone. But he didn’t.”
“How would you know?”
Another shrug. “He talks to me. And I’m his neighbor. I’d have noticed. Hell, my sister has been crushing on him for a year now. Stalks him. She says he hasn’t even looked at another woman since you.”
“This is stupid. You can’t know this.” But I swallow thickly, my throat closing. “As for your stalker of a sister…”
Am I jealous? Is that possible?
“I know. She wheedled Kaden’s phone number out of me one night and has been plaguing him with pics and texts since then. I told him to block her number. I think he just doesn’t care. He’s cared even less since you left.”
This takes a moment to sink in. A long, hard moment. “So she sends him pics? And texts?”
He nods, his expression tight.
“Kissy pics, by any chance?” I ask, still processing what he said. “And she calls him hon?”
“I wouldn’t know.” He gets up, suddenly all business, the teasing light gone from his eyes. “She’s a brat, and one day she’ll learn the hard way that not everyone likes playing games. I’ll leave you two lovebirds, then. Give Kaden my regards, and tell him I’m here if he needs anything.”
“Wait. Wait!” I trail after him, holding on to my towel so it won’t fall off, and snag his sleeve before he steps outside. “Jared.”
He looks at my hand on his sleeve, then quirks a brow at me.
“Look, thank you for looking after Kaden. And for everything you told me. I may… have rushed into conclusions. About him.”
“Trust issues? You two really are a match for each other. I mean, did you ask him what his tattoos mean? All those keys?”
“What do they mean?”
“He’s locked himself up inside. He’s trying to open up. To trust.” At my look, he smirks. “He talks when he’s shitfaced.”
I release his sleeve. “I screwed up, didn’t I?”
“Look, as long as you’re both alive…” He takes a deep breath, then smiles, softening his ominous words. “Yeah, then you can always fix things, princess. The world hasn’t ended. Just talk.”
“I will,” I vow and close the door behind him.
Chapter Fifteen
Kaden
Waking up achy and grumpy is a bad habit. I need to stop drinking so much.
But as my bleary eyes start to clear and I make out my room and the pills and glass of water by the bed side, as her scent drifts up and fills my senses, it all comes back to me.
Hailey.
I sit up too fast and the room starts spinning. Dizzy, I fist my hands into the covers and wait it out, gritting my teeth and willing my churning stomach to settle.
Hitting my head sucks. Then again… it may have knocked some sense into me. Why didn’t I call Hailey since she left? I was fucking angry, sure, but her accusations… I remember them now. At the time they didn’t make sense, and I was pissed she’d looked at my phone without permission.
But whose fault was it that she got suspicious? I kept her mostly locked out of my life.I never bothered to listen to what she accused me of. All I heard was her distrust, and then she was out the door and out of town.
Never paused to consider the fact that we may be more similar than I thought.
That we both have difficulty trusting others.
And that I didn’t help things any by keeping her at arm’s length when she let in the whole of me.
Not fair to her.
I’m gonna make it up to her. Clear this up. Make her see I could be good for her.
Christ, I’m as fucking nervous as I’ve ever been, and the dizziness isn’t helping. I swing my legs off the bed and swallow down bile. How am I to win my girl back when I’m feeling like shit?
Probably look it, too.
Hell.
And this beard… I tug on it. It’s grown too long and shaggy. I could trim it.
Or shave it off. Cut my hair. Matt shaved off his beard and cut his hair. Turned civilized.
If he could do it, I can do it, too.
Maybe not the hair. I like tying it back when I work. But the beard has to go.
Shall I do this? Show Hailey I can change. I am capable of it. I’m just a mechanic, a grease monkey, and she’s a fucking queen, but at least she will see I’m trying.
I sure damn hope it will be enough.
By the time I’ve managed to stand up without throwing up or faceplanting, I hear voices in th
e living room. And by the time I make it to my bedroom door and reach for the handle, it turns and Hailey appears in the opening.
Her hair piled up on top of her hair, golden strands framing her face, and wearing nothing.
Okay, wearing a towel wrapped around her, but that isn’t leaving much to my imagination. Or my memory, because now I remember everything, and I remember every time I’ve been with her, every detail of her body, every tiny mole and little imperfection – every curve and every inch of satiny skin.
Her mouth opens in a tiny O of surprise, then her gaze travels down my body, over my chest to my dick that’s hardening fast and rising to say hi.
Her breath catches, her dark eyes flicking up to my face and back down. My dick likes the attention, swelling more, and I wrap a hand around it and give it a good stroke, letting my gaze drift down her neck to where her tits are almost spilling out of the towel.
My towel, wrapped around her, and I like that. A lot.
“Jared was here,” she whispers, talking to my dick. “Says he’s here if you need anything.” She clears her throat. “We need to talk about…”
Her cheeks are flushed red, her eyes glittering. Her tits rise and fall rapidly. I can smell her arousal, sweet, heady.
Again my plans go out the window when she reaches for me, planting her hands on my chest, pressing herself to me. Since the first time I saw her, I knew I’d be spoiled for other girls. My mind goes blank, my body goes hot and tight, and my heart… I fucking gave it to her from the start.
In a locked box. All the keys inked on my body and I didn’t give her the key to myself.
I’m offering it now. “I love you, Hailey. No more fucking against the wall and on the floor. I’ll make love to you.”
“But I love it when you do me against the wall,” she breathes, and oh fuck, she’s killing me. “And on the floor. I told you when we first met… I like all you do to me, Kade.”
With a growl, I press her back against the doorjamb and slam my mouth over hers. I need to slow down, do this my way. Show her I can do it the slow, civilized way. That I care enough to try it. But when the towel opens, falling to the floor, and I put my hands on her soft body, I lose control.
Again.
I eat up her mouth, my dick caught between us, her tits rubbing on my chest, and yeah, the slow love-making I had in mind will have to wait again. I need her now, with an urgency I haven’t felt in ages.
Not since she left.
I lick at her lips, then bite the side of her neck until her head falls back and she pushes her tits out. I bend over to suck on them and dip two fingers inside her pussy.
Fuck, she’s so damn wet and hot. Scorching. Pumping my fingers in and out, opening her up, I straighten to kiss her mouth some more, struggling with my last threads of control.
Then it snaps, and I pull my fingers out to replace them with my cock. I lift her legs until they’re wrapped around my hips and push into her, one slow, hard shove that has my head spinning.
The room is spinning again, in fact, but I don’t fucking care. I’m right where I want, where I need to be. I want to stay like this forever, inside her, but she squirms and moans my name, and I need to start moving.
Sliding in and out of her tight heat is fucking amazing. I lift her higher, to thrust in deeper, and damn it all, this is off the fucking charts. Her pussy squeezing around my cock, her moans in my mouth, her body arching into mine.
“Oh shit,” she whispers, and clenches harder, her heels digging into the back of my thighs as she writhes on me. Then she’s coming with a cry, milking my dick until I see stars.
I slam a hand on the wall by her head to keep my balance and clench my jaw as my balls detonate and my cock jerks inside her.
“Hay…oh fuck.” She’s still clenching and moving, and I come so fucking hard my knees buckle. Whoa.
Black spots swim in my vision. The room starts to tilt.
Shit, this isn’t a good sign.
“Kaden. Don’t pass out on me,” she warns, lifting a hand to my face. “Kade!”
I grunt, not feeling all that good now the adrenaline and the pleasure have begun to ebb, so I unhook her legs from around me and drag her to bed.
If I’m to pass out now, then at least I can do it there with my girl in my arms.
Chapter Sixteen
Hailey
He pushes himself too hard.
Not that I regret a single moment of it. My body’s still humming with pleasure as I curl over him, listening to his heart.
He’s asleep.
At least I hope so.
Worry grips me. Lifting my head, I watch his face, not sure what I’m looking for. His eyes flicker rapidly under his lids, his golden lashes gleaming in the morning light filtering through the window slats. His breathing changes, speeding up.
He’s dreaming.
I stroke his cheek, loving the smoothness of his skin under my fingertips, then the coarseness of his beard. I wonder how he’d look without it. When I first met him, it was short and trimmed along the lines of his face. Now it’s hiding him, a golden cloud.
I lower my hand before I start tugging on it.
Grinning, I glance around his room, taking it in, taking my time. I’ve been here a couple of times before, but it was always in the night for a quick fuck and sleep before he had to head out to the garage, and I always left with him.
It’s such a typical guy room. Plain, spartan, one huge bed in the middle and the closet taking up one side. The walls are unadorned but for one large drawing done in black ink.
A key, made up of smaller keys, made up of smaller ones. It’s like an infinity puzzle.
I squint at the bottom corner, and I think I make out the signature. Z. Madden. The same guy who did Kaden’s tats? Interesting.
I look back down at the guy asleep underneath me, taking up most of the bed with his big frame, his face relaxed once more, and trace his tattoos with my gaze.
Keys. So many keys. And Jared said they symbolize trust. Or rather, Kaden’s mistrust. All the locks that keep him from opening up, like some magic box, but what are the keys?
How do I make him trust me? Why wouldn’t he?
What if he needed more time, and I ran away before he could? I mean, look at me. I ran instead of giving him a chance to prove himself out of cowardice. I chose to protect myself, my heart, instead of sitting down to talk things out.
I shouldn’t feel so light-hearted, so… content. That talk we were supposed to have instead of him screwing my brains out against the wall can’t be put off for much longer. Maybe I should call the hospital.
What if he lost the memory of our fight forever? What if he never remembers it? Should I tell him?
Of course I should. What am I thinking?
It’s just that…I’m happy. Truly happy for the first time ever. I think even back when I first met Kaden, I wasn’t one hundred percent there.
I want to tell him I was wrong, that he didn’t betray my trust as I thought, therefore I trust him, but how do I do that without telling him what happened?
Later, I extricate myself from Kaden’s side to go get dressed and see how to have my stuff brought over from the hotel. I guess I’ll have to leave Kaden alone for a while, go pay and get everything back here. Then I should buy some groceries and cook up some breakfast. Or lunch, or whatever. And clean up the place a bit.
Or is it a bad idea? Am I presuming things? Making myself at home as if I belong here? Like, I haven’t asked him if he wants me staying here until he’s better.
Great, I’m second-guessing myself again.
I pull on yesterday’s clothes and wrinkle my nose at the smell. Yeah, I need my bag from the hotel, and maybe I could do a laundry. No matter what, he wouldn’t mind me using his washing machine, right?
God, I don’t want to go back to Chicago. Back to how we were until a few days ago. I want to be with him as we are now.
Sighing, I pick up my cell phone and find, like, fifty thousan
d messages from Trent, and a few from Maggie.
I should change my phone number.
Though I’m glad I didn’t, or Matt wouldn’t have located me to tell me what happened to Kaden.
I call Maggie, and she picks up on the first ring. “Hailey! You all right? You haven’t texted me or called me since you vanished and I didn’t know how it went!”
This is proof that I’m a crappy best friend and a deplorable human being. “Sorry, Mags. I got so caught up in everything I forgot to send you an update. Group hug?”
“You suck satyr balls, but sure why not? I’ll take the virtual hugs and leftovers.” She’s laughing, and it makes me relax. “I’m guessing a certain blond god is getting the real-life hugs and kisses?”
I sit down on the sofa, tucking my hair behind my ears. “Maybe?”
“Ha, I knew it. I knew you only had to talk to him!”
“Yeah, well. We didn’t.”
“Didn’t what?”
“Didn’t talk.”
A pause. I can almost hear the cogs turning in Maggie’s pretty head.
“Does that mean what I think it means?”
“Depends? You think all sorts of weird things.”
“Have you been in Kansas City for, what, three days now, and all this time you’ve been in bed with Kaden Hansen?”
My ears are on fire. “No, of course not. He was in the hospital. Concussion, remember?”
“Yeah, sure.” She sighs. “But you haven’t talked. So… you’re coming back?”
I glance at the closed bedroom door. “I guess. I… don’t know. I mean, we will talk, but he doesn’t… doesn’t remember things yet.”
A gasp. “You frigging kidding me? He doesn’t remember what?”
“The fight,” I say miserably. “He thinks we never split up.”
“Oh. My. God.”
“I know, okay?” I wince. “He’ll remember any moment now, though. And then we’ll talk.”
“Good!”
