by Jo Raven
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
And I mean it. I rub circles on his chest. “Will you tell me about yourself? About your brother?”
He sighs, settles better against the pillows, tightens his arms around me. “Matt and me, we grew up in a small place right outside Jefferson city, Wardsville. Ever heard of it?” When I shake my head, he smiles. “Yeah, few people have. Dad was a truck driver, and he liked living there. Later we moved to the outskirts of Saint Louis.”
“Was a truck driver?”
“Yeah. He passed last year. Stroke.”
I swallow hard. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. Mom was pretty crushed, though. My brother relied a lot on her to watch over the kids, and now… I don’t know how he’s doing.”
“Why are you so concerned about him?”
“Matt lost his wife Emma to cancer recently. He has two young kids. And he needs me, he needs anything that can anchor him—and these fucking charges, the fucking rumors took that from him. He kept hanging up on me when I called and tried to talk to him. Now he won’t even pick up the damn phone.” He grunts. “Not sure why the hell I’m telling you all this. Haven’t said any of this to anyone.”
Exactly what I was thinking about myself. I wonder what it means.
I rub my face against his smooth, muscled chest. “Maybe you needed to get it off your chest.”
He grabs his phone from the nightstand, shows me a picture. There’s a dark-haired guy whose face looks a lot like Kaden’s, standing with a slight woman. They’re holding two babies, and there’s a tall guy with a fearsome Mohawk beside her.
“So that’s Matt?”
“And Emma, and the kids.”
“And the Mohawk guy?”
“Emma’s adopted brother, Zane Madden. He’s a tattoo artist. He did Matt’s tattoos, and mine.”
I smile at the pic. They all look so happy. So sad to know the girl is gone. “Your brother… how did he find out about the charges this girl filed against you?”
“He was visiting me. He’d finally decided to come see me, and the owner of the shop I’d been working at then, who’d just fired me over this, by the way, told him all about it.”
I wince in sympathy. So easy to repeat things you hear without knowing the full truth.
And here I am, trusting Kaden to tell me the truth. Am I that naïve?
I need to talk to that girl. Eva. Maybe the bartender could help me find her? Or Marcela. Otherwise, I’ll doubt myself all the way, and it’s not fair to Kaden.
Or to myself.
“Eva? You want to talk to Eva Price?” The bartender, whose name as it turns out is George, is staring at me, eyes bugging. “Kaden’s ex who filed charges against him?”
“Yes, that one.”
“But why?”
“Something I want to ask her.”
“Don’t you think she will tell you to get lost?”
I shrug. It’s a possibility.
“Does Kaden know about this?”
“No, and you won’t tell him.” I lean against the bar. “Please.”
He tugs on his short beard. “If you’re about to do something to hurt him…”
“I’m not.” I lift my hands. “I swear. I just want to clear up something that’s been bugging me. I like Kaden.”
“You like him.”
Heat rushes into my cheek. “I said that, didn’t I?”
“A lot.”
“A little.”
“An awful lot.”
Crap. “Okay, an awful lot. So what?”
“I’ll give you Eva’s number. Fuck that bitch anyway. You may tell her I said that, and that she’s not welcome in this bar anymore, just in case she’s wondering.”
“Got it. George said fuck you, bitch, and you’re not welcome in his fucking bar anymore.”
His bushy brows shoot up. “Well, shit. I see why Kaden is head over heels for you.”
He is?
I take the number, nod at George in thanks and make my way out. I wait until I’m sitting inside my car to do a fist pump and jiggle around in my seat, grinning from ear to ear.
“Kaden is head over heels for you.”
Holy crap.
As I calm down and pull out my phone to call this Eva, I try to examine my own feelings for Kaden, and there’s no doubt I’m crushing hard.
Okay. First things first.
I call Eva and she replies almost immediately.
“Eva Price speaking. Who is it?”
“Hi. I’m a friend of George from the Moonlight Bar in Kansas City. He said I should ask you for information about Kaden Hansen.”
“Why would I…? What do you want?” Her tone has turned hostile.
“You filed charges against him. I want to know what exactly he made you do that was so horrible.”
“Are you a reporter?”
“No.” I cross my fingers, hoping that was the right response. “I’m asking for a friend who likes Kaden. Did he hurt you? Did he force anything on you?”
“Kaden never forced me.” Her voice drops. “He’s a bit rough in bed but that wasn’t… Oh God, I don’t know. I shouldn’t have filed those charges. I used to hang out with a guy at Moonlight and he told me bad things about Kaden, told me how he was a pervert and that he asks weird things of all the girls he goes out with. I freaked out.”
I realize I’m holding my breath. I let it out slowly. “So it was a mistake?”
“Yes, it was a mistake. Tell your friend that.” She pauses for a second. “It’s Christmas time. Time for forgiving, love and understanding, right? Take care of Kaden. Make him happy. He’s a good guy.”
She disconnects and I am left staring outside, my fingers clenching on the phone. Here’s my answer.
And now I need to help Kaden get his brother back.
“Oh yeah,” Kaden murmurs, his breathing harsh. He’s leaning back in the armchair, his legs spread, one hand resting over the bulge there. “Show me, girl.”
I grin at him as I unclasp my bra and slowly drag the straps down my arms. I don’t let the bra fall, cupping my breasts over the lace, and lick my lips.
He groans, pressing down on his hard-on. He loves watching me undress, touch myself. And I like it, too. It’s exciting to see how much I turn him on. He’s so beautiful as he gives in to his desires.
We’ve been going out—dating? maybe?—for the past three weeks. We haven’t tried much yet, but it’s the third time I strip for him and it makes me feel…sexy. Desirable. More wanted than ever.
He misses no chance to show his appreciation.
Like now. “God, girl, you’re killing me. Show me those tits. They’re so perfect. You’re beautiful, Hailey, fuck…”
My pulse spikes at his words, and the way his broad chest rises and falls unevenly, the way his green eyes turn black with arousal.
I let the bra fall and cup my girls, stroking over my nipples with my thumbs.
“You’re hot,” he rasps, the knot in his throat moving as he swallows. “Fuck… take off your panties.”
I slide my hands down my stomach, then to the sides, and push down my panties, an inch at a time. When I’m done, I glance up at him and smirk.
“Christ. Open your legs. Do it.”
I open them slowly, and his breath hitches.
He looks into my eyes and one side of his full mouth tips up. “Come here.”
I rise and walk over to him. He likes to watch, but he also likes to sink inside me, and God, I love it. So I reach down and stroke his hard-on through the fabric of his pants—and his head falls back, letting me.
Unzipping his jeans, I draw out his thick, long cock. It’s flushed and wet with precum. It twitches in my hand, and a groan rumbles in Kaden’s chest.
“Everything,” he whispers. “Everything feels good with you.”
We haven’t tried the spanking or any of the other ass work yet, but I’m excited about it. He’s careful with me, never pushing me too far. Careful, yet r
ough when I want him to be. My heart swells as I look at him, his handsome face twisted with desire as I tug on his hard-on.
His hand closes over mine and he guides his cock into me, his other hand gripping my hip, steadying me. His pretty eyes go hazy with lust as he sinks inside me, taking his time, letting me adjust to his girth. I splay my hands on his bare chest, the play of solid muscles under my palms distracting me from the stretch—until it changes into pure pleasure, making me gasp with it.
“Hay…” He calls me that when we’re alone together, and sinks another inch deeper, balls-deep. “Fuck, yeah…”
I slide my hands up to his powerful shoulders and roll my hips. He grunts, and I moan as the pleasure expands, rushing up my spine, making my nipples throb and my pussy clench.
I never knew that having sex could feel so good. I discover more and more ways to pleasure with Kaden every day. We experiment together. He’s happy, I can feel it.
And I’m happy, too. Happier than I’ve ever been.
His breathing changes, and I know he’s close. He lifts a hand to my breast, circling my nipple, then bending to take it in his mouth. He nips at it, and a cry escapes me. It feels amazing.
Then he drops his hand between my legs, rubbing my clit, and I come apart, shaking against him. He grips my hips and lifts me a little to better slam into me a few more times as I ride the aftershocks, then he’s coming, too, stifling a cry on my shoulder.
“God I love you,” he breathes.
My heart does a funny little flip. But that’s just post-orgasmic talk, isn’t it? Nothing to take seriously.
Although I’m falling for him. Especially because I am falling for him, no matter how I fight it.
“Mmmf. What are you doing?”
“I’m taking a picture of you.”
“Now? Why?”
Because he looks gorgeous, sprawled naked on my sheets, his blond hair loose, his mouth reddened. He’s lying on his stomach, his hard body in full display, the round globes of his ass slightly splayed, one arm folded under his head.
Like a classical statue of a man.
Only I want to lick him, drag my tongue and lips over every part of him, squeeze every defined muscle and bite into it.
I’d bite into that ass. Totally.
“Fuck,” he mumbles, lifting his head from his arm, his eyes widening. “That’s a monster of a camera. What are you, a professional?”
“Yes, as a matter of fact.”
“Damn…” He huffs a laugh and lets his head fall back down.
“What?”
“That’s damn sexy.”
Shucks. His words make me feel warm inside. I’m proud of my profession, of my art, but he thinks it’s sexy, and that’s… cute. And nice.
And yeah, he never asked me what I do for a living before. He’s seen a few of my photos, the ones I managed to hang. I bet he thought I was a programmer or something. I did spend most of my free time updating my website.
“You never told me…” He reaches for my hand, tugs me down with him until he can look into my eyes. “What happened with your fiancé. Why you moved away from him.” He grins. “Not that I’m complaining. His loss.”
There’s a light in his eyes lately that draws me in. I lean in, kiss his mouth. “My fiancé … he slept with my cousin. I found them together. He’d been doing it for a while. So I packed my things and left.”
He strokes my cheek. “I’ll never do that to you. I swear. No secrets.”
He’s been honest with me from the start. I turn to kiss his hand. “I don’t believe in love at first sight.”
“I don’t, either. Took me a couple of hours to be sure.”
I laugh softly. “So is this what it is?”
“Love at second sight? Maybe.” He brushes hair from my face. “I know I love you. And I like being with you. A lot. So what do you say we take it a day at a time?”
“Sounds good to me.” And my heart is soaring.
His phone rings much later, as I’m sitting at my computer, downloading the pictures I took of him. They’re good, although not as good as the man himself. I’m totally making that Christmas themed calendar and giving it to him, so he can see how gorgeous he is.
I have to work quickly. It’s Christmas Eve. How time flies when you’re happy…
He rustles on the bed behind me. I hear him curse, then answer.
There’s a beat of silence, and the next word coming from his mouth has me turning around.
“Matt?”
I look at Kaden. His brows are drawn together, and there’s a suspicious brightness in his eyes.
“Yeah,” he says. “Yeah, good to hear from you, man. Been too long. I know. Yes, I do know. Nothing to be sorry for. It did sound bad.” Then his frown deepens. “She did? When? I see. Well, okay then. Let me know when I can come up and see you. Yeah, Merry Christmas, bro.”
He disconnects the call, lets the phone drop on the bed, and looks up at me. Emotions war in his bright gaze. Happiness. Shock. Confusion. A tiny bit of anger.
Uh-oh.
“You called my brother?”
“He wouldn’t pick up when you called him. He didn’t know my number.” I shrug. “So he answered.”
“You told him you talked to Eva. To Eva!” He presses the heels of his palms into his eyes. “Jesus Christ, Hailey. Why?”
“Because I needed to know.”
“You didn’t trust me.”
“I didn’t know you!”
He rubs a hand over his face. “Fucking hell. I thought we said no secrets. You called him over a week ago. Why didn’t you say something?”
“I didn’t know if he’d call you.”
“That doesn’t matter. You should have told me.”
God, he’s right. I didn’t trust him when I asked Eva, and I didn’t make things any better by not telling him what I did. “I’m sorry. But I’m not sorry I called your brother. He needs you. And you need him. The rumors cost both of you a lot.”
“I know what this cost me. Dammit, how did you even get his phone number?”
I chew on my lip. “I, uh. I checked your contact list? Just that, I swear.”
He gets up and starts pulling on his clothes, his eyes not meeting mine. “I need to go.”
My heart is breaking. This is all my fault. “Please, Kaden. Don’t go. Let’s talk about this.”
“I need to think. Alone.” He pulls on his pants, his shirt, his socks and boots as I stand there helpless, wringing my hands. “Need to go.”
Tears track down my cheeks as he gets up and heads for the door.
“Will I see you again?” I ask.
He doesn’t reply. The door clicks shut.
After spending the rest of the day and the night pacing my room, I have to admit to myself that I made a mistake. A huge mistake. I should have told him. I thought it might be a nice surprise if his brother called him at long last. I never thought about how Kaden would feel about me going behind his back to ask questions and calling his brother.
I sometimes forget Kaden doesn’t know me well, either. He entrusted me with his secrets, his fantasies. His heart.
And I didn’t reciprocate. Even the thing about my job. Sure, he never asked outright what my job is, but he did ask what I was doing glued to my laptop and I’d avoided answering, telling him I was updating some stuff.
I’d held back. Partly because my fiancé’s betrayal had pushed me back behind my walls. And partly because I was wary of opening my heart to someone I was falling for.
But then he said he loves me. He said it first, he said it again, and all I said was that I don’t believe in love at first sight.
Least I can do is say it back.
He won’t answer his phone, so I grab my purse and I drive to Moonlight. George gives me a narrowed-eyed look, then pours me a gin and tonic, although it’s still midday.
Grabbing my glass, I sit on a stool and sigh. “I’m looking for Kaden.”
“I swear he’s not hiding behind t
he bar.”
“Any idea where he might be? He won’t answer my calls.”
He heaves out a breath. “That’s a bad sign.”
I know. “Where would he go if he needs to think?”
He lifts one shoulder in a half shrug. “The cemetery. His dad’s grave.”
I’m already getting off the stool. “Where is it?”
“Saint Louis. Mount Olive cemetery.”
“Thank you,” I tell him fervently and run off to find the man I love.
Chapter Six
Kaden
The sun is shining from between the clouds. Coming and going. Like my thoughts.
The grass is very green, the tombstones white. The letters stark.
“What would you have done, Dad?” He’d never been much of a talker, or even much of a father, but he’d kept my mom happy, and this place calms me down.
It’s the quiet. The symmetry. The openness of the place.
The fact that nobody is replying to my endless questions.
“I love her,” I tell him, standing over his tomb, arms folded over my chest. “I’ve never felt this way before in my life, so that has to count for something. And I told her the bad things about me. She stayed.”
The wind whistles. Cold slices through me. I fight a shiver.
“She stayed, but she went behind my back to ask about me. She asked goddamn Eva. And then called Matt without telling me. Checked my phone without asking if it was okay. But then…” I shiver. “She brought him back to me. Not sure I could have done it on my own. My pride was hurt. I’m stubborn. Hell, all of us are in this family. Took after you, I guess.”
A slender figure of a woman is wandering on the far side of the cemetery. For a fleeting moment she seems familiar.
I look back at the tombstone. “She didn’t know me well when she asked Eva. I have to remember that. Still doesn’t know me well. She heard the rumors, but didn’t back away. I told her the things I like and she didn’t get scared. She did trust me. I fucked up by running, didn’t I?”
“Not really.” Her voice is cheerful, and I spin around to find Hailey standing there in her long coat, cheeks flushed from the cold. “You had every right to be upset.”
