by Lina Langley
“You knew?”
“Not like, in my head,” Eli said. “It’s hard to describe. It sounds stupid, but I could feel it, I don’t know, in my heart.”
“It doesn’t sound stupid to me,” Max said.
“He would come, and he would watch my plays, and he would bring me flowers,” Eli said. “Then we would go back to this tiny shared bedroom apartment that I had rented off this woman online and it wasn’t bad, but it certainly didn’t afford us the privacy that we were used to.”
“You didn’t like it,” Max said.
“I didn’t,” Eli said. “It was meant to be this celebratory, momentous period in my life and he wasn’t into it. We had sex, a lot of sex, and I wanted… I don’t know, I was tired. I liked the sex but I wanted domesticity. It felt like he only went to NYC to claim me. And I know that sounds really stupid and conceited but—”
“It doesn’t,” Max said, squeezing Eli’s hand.
“It doesn’t what?”
“It doesn’t sound stupid,” he said. “It sounds annoying and difficult, but not stupid.”
Eli smiled. “You’re kind.”
“No,” Max said. “I just listen.”
“Then what happened?”
“I got a chance to do a play in a big theatre,” Eli said. “It was a one time production and I worked really hard on it. It wasn’t a smashing success by any means but we did okay.”
“Where was he?”
“Home,” Eli said. “Here, in Sierra. According to him, he didn’t need to go see it. It was all unnecessary. I had done the big thing that I needed to do and nothing else had to happen.”
“Oh, no,” Max said.
Eli took a deep breath. “When I went home, he asked me if I was done.”
“He didn’t!” Max replied, his eyes wide.
“He did,” Eli replied. “He said I’d had my little adventure and it was time I came home.”
“What did you do?”
Eli sighed, closing his mouth and licking his teeth. He closed his eyes. Max reached out to touch his face. He could have stopped himself, but he didn’t want to. He wanted to make sure that Eli knew that Max was in his corner and that what he was telling him was not okay.
“I went home,” he said. “I did exactly what I was supposed to do. I was there, and we drank a bottle of champagne, and then we had sex. So much sex.”
“You don’t sound happy about it.”
“It wasn’t good sex,” Eli replied. “He just… he was possessive. He never asked me once if I was ready. Not like you did.”
“He sounds horrible,” Max said quietly.
“He wasn’t,” Eli replied. “I mean, he wasn’t generally horrible. He loved me and he was desperate. I could have spoken to him, but I didn’t want to. I think part of me could just see that we were coming to an end and I didn’t want to do anything to fix it. It was unkind.”
“It wasn’t.”
“You’re right,” Eli said, biting his lower lip. “It wasn’t just unkind. It was cruel.”
“That’s not what I meant,” Max said, shaking his head. “I meant, I can see why wouldn’t want to stay with him.”
Eli closed his eyes. “I don’t think I was asking him for too much,” he said. “Or maybe I was.”
“You weren’t,” Max said. “I don’t think asking someone to support your dreams is too much.”
“That’s why we’re both creatives and they’re not, though, right?”
“Right,” Max said with a smirk. After a little while, he spoke quietly. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad you let it fizzle out.”
“You are?”
Max nodded, leaning in to kiss Eli on the mouth again. “Yes,” he said. “I’m happy that you’re here.”
“I’m happy that I’m here too,” Eli replied breathlessly when Max moved away from him.
It only took Eli the second that Max had to take a breath before Eli was on his mouth again. He kissed Max softly at first, then kissed him more and more deeply, their breathing quickening at the same time. The shift between sweet to passionate happened seamlessly, their mouths half-open and filled with gasps. Their gasps turned into sloppy kisses, their mouths fully open, their tongues pressing against one another’s.
Max moved away from him just for a second, taking a deep breath once again, his hard cock throbbing with anticipation. “Do you want this?”
“Yes,” Eli replied. “Please.”
Max kissed him again, this time harder, with less build-up. Their kisses were so deep that Max thought he might never breath again, but it didn’t matter, because they could have made out for ages and that would have been enough for Max, he was enjoying this that much.
He put his hand on Eli’s cheek. It was hot to the touch, covered in little beads of sweat. His hair was sticking to his face, much like Max’s own was. He didn’t care too much about that, all that he cared about was the way that Eli’s kisses made him feel. He was already trembling by the time that he pulled away from Eli.
It was only when he was looking down at him that he realized just how little Eli was wearing and how much he was. Eli’s button-up shirt was open to reveal his beautiful, hard chest and he wasn’t wearing any underwear. His jeans were thrown somewhere around the room, but he wasn’t sure where.
“You’re teasing me,” Eli said between groans.
“I’m not,” Max said. “I just like looking at you.”
“Can you look at me somewhere else?”
Max bit his lower lip. “What did you have in mind?”
Eli groaned, his pale cheeks tinted with a reddish hue. “How about you inside of me?”
Max groaned, leaned down and kissed him on the mouth again. “Is that what you want?”
“Yes,” Eli said. “Please. More than anything.”
“Okay,” Max replied. “Give me a second.”
“To do what?”
“Get some lube,” Max said. “Catch my breath.”
“Those sound like sensible things,” Eli replied. “But I feel like this is a little unfair.”
“What is?”
“You’re wearing those clothes,” Eli said. “And I’m hardly wearing anything.”
Max bit his lower lip as he looked down at Eli then leaned down and kissed the tip of his nose softly. “So things are unfair?”
“Extremely unfair,”
“How about this? I take off my clothes and then I go and get the lube,” Max replied. “So you can watch me walk away.”
Eli licked his lips. “And I get to see your dick?”
“Sure,” Max said, tracing the outline of Eli’s face with his fingertips. “If you want to.”
“Oh, I want to,” Eli said. “I want you.”
Max moved off the bed and started to take off his clothes. He wasn’t too slow, because even if he had wanted to be, he couldn’t take too long because he couldn’t keep putting this off. He already felt like he was so on edge, like he was so close to coming just from touching Eli.
Soon, he was standing completely naked in front of Eli, feeling exposed and on edge. Eli looked him up and down, wetting his lips, his gaze lingering over his cock. “That was…”
“What?”
“Completely worth the wait,” Eli said. “But now it’s just torture.”
“Let me get the lube and condoms, okay?” Max said. “Then I promise I’ll try to stop torturing you.”
“You have to,” Eli said. “Because if you don’t, I might actually explode all over myself. And that would be embarrassing.”
“Or super hot,” Max replied. He walked away to the wardrobe where he kept the condoms and the lube, and he made sure to lean down just enough so that Eli would be able to take a good look. He couldn’t stand teasing him for too long, though, because he was looking forward to this as much as Eli was. He walked over to the bed again, taking a place at the bottom of it, bringing his face down to Eli’s cock. He kissed the head of his cock, licked his slit, teased him by holding the base o
f his cock just hard enough to enhance the sensitivity. Soon, Eli’s hips were buckling under him, and it was clear that he was about to come.
“I need you,” Eli pleaded quietly. “Please. I need you.”
Max teased him by moving his fingers down his cock and onto his ass, only pressing softly, which elicited another moan from Eli. He let go of Eli’s cock and grabbed the bottle of lube with his free hand, opening it with his teeth as his fingers started to be more insistent with his fingers. It had been a while since he had done it, but he didn’t have that much time to question whether he was doing it right, and from the way that Eli was moaning, he thought that he was.
He pulled his fingers away from him and licked his lips as he squirted some of the lube onto the tips of his fingers. “I’m getting you ready,” Max said. “Then I’m going to fuck you until you come. Okay?”
“Sounds amazing,” Eli said. He closed his eyes and gasped as Max entered him with one finger first, then another, slowly until Eli was moaning with pleasure and until Max thought that he couldn’t hold on anymore.
When Max spoke, his voice was low and raspy. “Are you ready for me?”
“Yes,” Eli said. “So ready for you.”
“Okay,” Max said. “Hold your knees up to your waist, okay? I want to see all of you when I’m inside of you.”
Eli closed his eyes and groaned. “You’re such a fucking tease.”
Max groaned, too, throwing his head back when he did. He grabbed the condom and fumbled with the wrapper, his fingers slippery when he did so. It was hard to open the wrapped, Max might have even described it as torture, but he didn’t have that much time to think about it.
Finally, after what felt like forever, he put the condom on. He took a hold of Eli’s legs with one hand, softly digging his fingers into his thighs, then moved his lubed up fingers back toward his hole. He needed to make sure that Eli was ready. He needed to make him ache, shake, scream for him. He looked so gorgeous like this, it was the least that Eli deserved. Eli groaned and moaned as Max started to finger him, finding his prostate as he fingered him, watching his rock hard cock twitch every time that his fingers touched the most sensitive part of him, feeling his body shudder under him.
“I’m ready,” Eli said. “Please, Max.”
Max took his fingers out of him and inched slightly closer to him so that his cock was level with Eli.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure.”
Max grabbed the back of Eli’s knees, looking down at him, his mouth watering as he saw the way that he looked. He was so gorgeous, Max had to take a moment to simply look at him. He grabbed his cock and entered Eli slowly, looking down at his face as he slowly inched inside of him. Soft and warm inside, he could see a little discomfort at first, then pleasure taking over Eli’s face.
“Are you okay?” Max asked breathlessly.
“More than okay,” Eli replied between sharp breaths.
“I want you to jerk yourself off while I fuck you,” Max said. Eli nodded, grabbing his cock as Max started to move his hips, thrusting himself into Eli softly at first, then faster and faster. Eli’s body tensed and turned red from his abdomen to his forehead and Max was sure that he would come from just watching him. He needed to stop himself somehow, they had both waited for this for so long. He shifted slightly so that he could kiss Eli and Eli’s hips moved back so that Max would have better access. Still, even though Eli was craning his neck up, it was hard to kiss him in this position, so only their tongues touched. Max could feel the tip of Eli’s cock on the skin of his stomach, and their flickering tongue kisses were almost too much, and the way that Eli looked, all glassy-eyed, his eyes brimming with tears, wasn’t helping Max with containing himself at all.
He was screaming that he was going to come as he fucked Eli, and Eli was screaming something too but Max couldn’t hear him, the pleasure felt like it had taken over his hearing, over every single one of his senses. They were coming together—Max was vaguely aware of how wet with come his stomach was now, both of their stomachs were now—but all that he could focus on were the waves of pleasure that he was feeling rolling over his body like a volcano explosion. They kissed again, this time not nearly as desperately, and then Max rolled off him and onto what he supposed had to be his side of the bed. Max supposed that it would be weird soon, but he hoped it wouldn’t be too soon. He was happy to bask in this, in this post-coital afterglow that part of him hoped would last forever, even if he knew that it couldn’t.
He was gasping for breath. It was that moment after they had both come, before things got awkward, when they were both lost in their own pleasure so much that it wasn’t weird yet.
He turned to face Eli around the same time that Eli turned to face him. They were both still gasping for breath. There was still sweat on their faces and Max noticed that Eli’s hair was sticking to his face. He looks beautiful though, his hair wet, his eyelashes wet, his eyes wide and glimmering, his lips slightly parted, his breathing ragged, his cheeks red. If his mind wasn’t blank, he would have thought about writing a song based on just the way he looked right then.
“That was…”
“I know,” Max said when Eli trailed off.
“You too?”
“Yes, Eli. Me too.”
Max took a second to catch his breath. He also let Eli do the same thing. Eli rolled over so that he was on his back and he was staring at the ceiling fan on the ceiling, which was making a noise that Max had only noticed up until right then. As discreetly as he could, Max grab the condom and threw it in the trash can next to the bed. Max rolled over so that he was on his side again, not caring about how dirty he was. He wanted to extend this moment for as long as he could.
Eli reached out and grabbed his hand. Their fingers interlaced and Eli stroked Max’s hand lightly. “That was incredible.”
Max bit his lower lip. “You should see what I’m like when I haven’t just performed in ridiculous heels.”
Eli smiled. “I can’t wait.”
Then his expression schooled and his eyes took on a hard glint that Max had never seen before. It wasn’t an expression that he thought he would have seen before, he was fully aware that they barely knew each other, and that, as such, he wouldn’t know the expressions that Eli used the majority of the time. However, through the night, this hadn’t been like him at all. It was Max’s only point of reference, which was why he found the severity of Eli’s look so startling.
“Eli?”
Eli didn’t turn around. He didn’t answer him at first. He didn’t jerk his hand away, his hand was still softly and securely in Max’s own hand, but he had stopped using his finger to lightly stroke him as he had before. Max wasn’t sure what he wanted to hear come out of Eli’s mouth right then. He might have wanted assurances that everything was okay, that Eli wasn’t really angry at him. After all, what could he be angry about? They were both consenting adults, and as far as Max was concerned, the night had to gone really well. It was coming to a close now, and Max could understand feeling a little bit melancholic.
He knew that he was romantic, and he knew that he let his mind wander a bit too much when he shouldn’t. He was already picturing what a relationship would be like with this guy, but they had both made it clear that the night had a one-night stand, and that it had been absolutely nothing else. What else could it have been when Max had practically chosen him up out of a lineup? He had curled his fingers and beckoned him over and Eli had practically fallen into bed with him. He was happy about it, of course he was, but he could understand why Eli might be upset suddenly.
He leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “Listen to me, Eli” he said.
“What?”
“I have a spare pair of pajamas. You can stay the night, I’m going to go get nice and clean, and then you can have a shower, or even a bath if you want to, and then we can sleep.”
Max turned to look at him, his brow furrowed. “You want to… sleep?”
“I mean, if you want to. You don’t have to do anything else.”
Eli’s expression didn’t change, but his voice sounded smaller when he spoke again. “Wait, you’re inviting me to stay the night?”
Max tried to make his tone casual, though it felt like what he was saying was important. Still, he didn’t want to be pushy. He didn’t want to make Eli dislike him by coming on too strong. He understood that the possibility of a relationship with him was ridiculous and the very manifestation of it in his imagination was just a testament to how lonely he was on the road, but he couldn’t help “It’s really late. You might have other commitments tomorrow. I don’t know. But I don’t, and I think my bed would feel desperately lonely without you after what happened.”
Eli nodded slowly, his head barely moving. His gaze was set on Max’s eyes and his own were wide. When he spoke, his voice was a little shaky. “Is that normal one night stand protocol?”
Max shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. But I do know that I don’t want you to go. You’re tired, you said you were barely awake before any of this happened. I’m sure you’re feeling it now. I’m feeling it too.”
Eli scoffed.
“What?”
“You’re just…”
Max licked his lips. He was trying not to seem as nervous as he was but his heart felt like it was beating so loud that Eli could hear it. “You can tell me what you think,” Max said. “I promise. I’m a big boy, I can take it.”
Eli chuckled. “It’s nothing.”
“Now who’s teasing who?”
“I’m not trying to tease you, you’re just, I don’t know, so nice.” Eli said shaking his head.
Max watched him. “You say that as if it’s a bad thing.”
“Honestly, I’m still trying to decide.”
“What’s the harm in staying? Just one night?”
“Just one night,” Eli said. “I would suggest we shower together, but I’m very tired and I’m afraid my dick might have other ideas when I see you.”
“I understand,” Max said. “I need a hot shower after an arduous gig.”
