It was far too dangerous to get invested in this town or in Honor Prescott.
* * *
Honor couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so incensed. Actually, she could. Six years ago when she had discovered from Boone that Joshua had burned the church down, Honor had been consumed with unbridled rage. It had seemed incomprehensible to her. How could he have done something so horrendous? In doing so, it had dealt their relationship a final devastating blow. All their plans for the future had been extinguished by his dangerous actions.
And now he had treated her with such cruelty and condescension. She didn’t care what he thought! Her presence here tonight at the clinic hadn’t been motivated by anything other than concern. The moment Liam had told her about Violet’s fall, Honor had wanted to be by his side to help him deal with the situation. She had acted on pure instinct.
As she sat down in the passenger seat of Liam’s car, she slammed the door behind her.
“Hey! Easy on the door. What’s wrong?” Liam asked as he revved his engine. “Did something go down between you and Joshua while I was locking up?”
Honor clenched her teeth. She felt like exploding. “I don’t want to talk about it,” she muttered.
“Uh-oh,” Liam said. “That doesn’t sound good. Whenever Ruby utters that phrase, I head for the hills.”
Honor threw her hands in the air. “Joshua had the nerve to question my motives. He brought up the injunction and we got into it. I came here tonight with the best of intentions. He should be—”
“Grateful?” Liam asked, shooting her a pointed look before turning his eyes back toward the road.
“Yes, he should. Don’t you think so?”
A small sigh slipped past his lips. “Honor, I think you should give Joshua a break.”
She sucked in a shocked breath. “What do you mean? You can’t stand Joshua. Why are you taking his side?”
“Simmer down, cowgirl. First of all, I don’t dislike him. I hated what he did to the church and this town.” His voice softened. “And to you. As your big brother, it gutted me to see you with a broken heart. But I let go of all those feelings a long time ago. My faith tells me to turn the other cheek. So that’s what I did.”
A groundswell of love for her brother rose up within her. He had always been the most tenderhearted of all her siblings.
“Can you really expect Joshua to be focused on gratitude when you filed the injunction against him?”
Tears welled in Honor’s eyes. “It wasn’t personal.”
Liam pulled up in front of the Moose Café and put his car in Park. He turned toward her, wiping away a stray tear on her cheek with his thumb. “I’m not criticizing you. I think it was a brilliant move designed to protect this town. I admire you more than mere words can express. You showed pluck and grit and ingenuity.”
Honor’s lips quivered. “Why can’t Joshua see it that way? He made it seem as if I’m being malicious.”
“Sis, you don’t have a mean bone in your body. If Joshua blew up at you tonight, I would say he’s simply hurting and frustrated. He looked scared tonight. Really petrified. He’s under a lot of strain on the heels of Bud’s passing. And he was terrified for Violet.”
Suddenly, she felt ashamed of herself. Liam was right. Joshua was in mourning for his grandfather. Maybe it had been wrong of her to file the injunction when he was at a low moment. She bit her lip. “I know. I can’t imagine how terrifying it must have been for both of them.”
“I know what it feels like to be a single father,” he said. “It can be really lonely and you question whether or not you’re doing a decent job as a parent. I empathize with him. That being said, why do you care so much? Isn’t he leaving soon to go back home?”
Honor knit her brows together. Liam’s question threw her for a loop. “What? I—I don’t really care all that much. It’s just that I’m trying to be cordial with him. Isn’t that turning the other cheek? I’ve tried to move beyond what happened between us in the past. As painful as it was for me to go through all of it with him, I realize he’s grown and changed. He’s been married. He’s a father now to a beautiful little girl. I’ve moved on.”
She met Liam’s gaze. “Have you, Honor? Really and truly? Because from where I’m sitting, it doesn’t seem like it. The look on your face when I told you about Violet’s accident was very telling.”
Honor rolled her eyes. “I’m not in love with him anymore if that’s what you’re insinuating. Those feelings died a long time ago.”
“I’m not saying you’re still in love with him. But what I am saying is that if you’re not careful, you’re going to fall in love all over again with your ex-fiancé.”
Chapter Eight
Joshua stood in the stables saddling up Blaze for a ride across the property. He felt excitement bubbling up inside him at the prospect of being at one with the Alaskan landscape. Since he’d been back home, riding had become one of his favorite pastimes. There was really nothing like it. It filled something inside his soul like nothing else could.
There had been a small snow squall late last night, but it had barely added to the accumulation already on the ground. Love, Alaska, was a wintry wonderland. He couldn’t deny how much he enjoyed being back at the ranch. It brought back to life a part of him he thought he’d buried a long time ago. It was hard to imagine not ever being able to ride across this landscape again.
Theo was on Violet duty while Joshua was taking this opportunity to venture out on the property. His brother had felt awful about not being around when the accident took place. As a treat, Uncle Theo had brought a huge teddy bear for Violet from a local gift shop called Keepsakes. Violet had embraced the stuffed animal with open arms, smothering it with hugs and endless kisses. She had gifted Theo with a million-dollar smile in return for his kindness. He shook his head at the irony in Theo purchasing the toy at the same store that he’d broken into on a dare back in his rebellious years.
Joshua couldn’t wait to have some alone time out on the range. He needed to clear his head regarding last night. Had he been too harsh on Honor? Or had he been right on point? He had no way of knowing since, when it came to Honor, he always seemed to lose his objectivity.
Last night when he had returned to the ranch, he’d gotten down on his knees and prayed about the situation. He was now a man who didn’t like volatile situations or drama. It reminded him all too much of things he would rather forget.
“Mr. Ransom. Can I have a few minutes?”
Joshua swung his gaze up. Cal Abilene, the ranch foreman, was standing in front of him with a look of concern carved on his face. He had his cowboy hat in his hand and his eyes swirled with strong emotions.
“Sure thing, Cal. What’s up?” he asked. From everything he had heard from Bud, as well as what he had seen with his own eyes, Cal was a great ranch foreman. Hardworking and honest, Cal had been at the Diamond R for almost twenty years. The ranch’s success was directly related to Cal’s strong work ethic.
Cal raked a hand through his shoulder-length dark hair.
“Would you mind telling me if you’re going to be selling the place? If so, I need to start looking for a new position here in town or head to the Kenai Peninsula where there are more opportunities to work on a ranch.”
Joshua felt his heart sink. How could he and Theo have been so thoughtless? The Diamond R had employees who counted on their paychecks to stay afloat. Selling the ranch would have a trickle-down effect.
“Honestly, Cal, things are up in the air at the moment. I’m sure you heard about the injunction filed against us?”
Cal nodded. “I sure did. Honor has a lot more pluck than I ever gave her credit for,” Cal said with a light chuckle.
“I’ll be straight with you. As soon as the injunction is lifted, Theo and I plan to accept an offer for the ranch. To be honest, I’m not sure if the outfit b
uying the Diamond R will keep you and the others on. That hasn’t been discussed.”
Cal’s face fell. “I’d like you to know the people who work on this ranch have been here for years. We work hard. We’ve always been invested in this place.” He twisted his mouth. “It’s hard to imagine this ranch changing hands. Bud poured his heart and soul into the Diamond R.”
Joshua felt a prickle of guilt. “I know he did. And if it’s okay by you, I’ll make sure to inquire as to whether the Alloy Corporation will be in need of a foreman and ranch hands.”
Cal scoffed. “For the dude ranch? No, thanks, Mr. Ransom. That doesn’t interest me. But I appreciate your giving it to me straight about selling the ranch. Now at least I know what I need to do.” With a nod of his head, Cal strode away from the stables.
Joshua stood by Blaze and watched as Cal quickly disappeared from sight. He felt awful. He had been so consumed by his own agenda and concern for Violet’s future that he hadn’t considered the people whose lives would be drastically altered if the Diamond R was sold.
Cal had driven the point home. Many lives were going to be affected by the sale of the ranch. Not just the townsfolk of Love, but the dedicated employees who had worked at the Diamond R for years. They would all have to seek employment elsewhere, or even leave Love in order to make a living. It wasn’t fair to them, but there was nothing he could do to change things. He had already agreed to sell. His future was in Seattle.
As he mounted Blaze and headed out across the property, Joshua let go of all the things that were burdening him. He took a deep breath of the fresh Alaskan air and began to gallop away from the ranch. Craggy mountains stretched out before him in the distance. There was nothing but wide-open spaces in front of him. He turned his face up toward the sky and allowed the sun’s rays to wash over him. He flew like the wind on Blaze’s back, feeling unfettered for the first time in ages.
From a distance, he spotted a person on horseback galloping toward him. As soon as the rider drew closer, Joshua recognized Honor seated on Lola. He had forgotten how close he was to the property line for the wildlife center.
“Honor,” he said, tipping his cowboy hat in her direction by way of greeting.
She reined in her horse, bringing Lola to a stop not far from him. “Hi, Joshua. I was just heading toward the Diamond R so I could check on the newborn calves.”
The calves. He had almost forgotten all about them. “It’s nice of you to take time out from the wildlife center to check on them.”
“Bud trusted me to do it a few times a week. He and I stayed close over the years. I wouldn’t feel right about stopping until a decision is made about the ranch.”
“I’m headed in that direction. We can ride together.” He frowned. “Unless you’d rather not.”
“I think the great outdoors is big enough for both of us,” she cracked, making a none-too-subtle reference to their war of words the other night.
“You’re right about that. It’s beautiful out here. Majestic. Seattle is a nice place to live, but it’s not this,” he said, scanning the area around them. This Alaskan vista was one of the most spectacular sights he had ever seen.
“How’s Violet this morning? If I may ask?”
“Of course you can. She’s doing well. Theo is probably spoiling her as we speak.”
“It’s all right to do so now and again. After all, she went through the wringer due to her accident. And she wasn’t the only one. I saw the alarm on your face. The love you feel for Violet is palpable.”
“Once you become a mother you’ll see how it is,” he said. “You always worry.”
Honor visibly winced. “I can imagine,” she murmured.
“I remember riding out here with you a lot,” Joshua said, meeting Honor’s gaze. Were the memories as indelible for her as they were for him? He could picture in his mind’s eye her long chestnut-colored hair whipping in the breeze and the look of joy on her face.
A slight smile twitched at her lips. “I remember the time we were looking for a herd of wild mustangs.”
Joshua laughed. “Bud told me if I caught one of ’em, I could keep him.”
Honor made a face. “Little did we know it was easier said than done.”
His grandfather had been a mischievous person. It had tickled him to no end to play jokes on him and Theo. On this occasion Bud had convinced Joshua to go out looking for wild mustangs. He’d fallen for it hook, line and sinker, not realizing that catching one was a near impossible task. In the end, he had come up empty-handed.
“I miss him,” he said, blurting out the sentiment that had been sitting on his heart ever since he’d learned of his grandfather’s death.
“Me too. He was truly one-of-a-kind. Sort of like Jasper.”
Joshua wrinkled his nose. “I’m not sure anyone on earth is quite like Jasper.”
They both laughed. God had broken the mold when He had created Mayor Jasper Prescott and everybody knew it.
“I will say he’s done something amazing with Operation Love. At the end of the day, people want to find love and a soft place to fall,” Honor said. “That’s happening here in town now thanks to my grandfather.”
A soft place to fall. That’s exactly what he’d wanted to give Honor all those years ago. And he knew she would have given it back in return. He wasn’t sure he would ever fully get over it. But he hoped life would bring him a loving partner and a mother for Violet. Everyone needed someone to lean on, to pray with, to grow old beside them. Perhaps one of these days God would hear his most fervent prayer.
“What about you?” he asked, blurting out the question he’d been dying to ask. “Are you signed up for the program?”
Honor looked at him, startled. “No, I’m not, but I appreciate what Jasper is doing for this town. Lately I’ve begun to realize that we all need that special someone in our lives. Who doesn’t want the fairy tale?” Her voice sounded soft and vulnerable. It made him want to sweep her into his arms and hold on to her for as long as she would allow.
“It sounds like you’re right where you need to be. There are lots of Alaskan bachelors in this town.” Joshua tried to stifle a sudden spurt of jealousy. He wanted Honor to be happy, but the thought of her settling down with another man bothered him. He couldn’t shake the feeling off or stop the images racing through his mind of Honor walking down the aisle and cradling a newborn in her arms.
Still, after all of this time, Joshua felt cheated out of the life he had envisioned leading with Honor.
Silence descended upon them as they neared the Diamond R. For a moment something hung in the air between them. Neither one mentioned the tension of the other night, but it hung between them like a live grenade. He didn’t know whether to broach the subject or simply leave it alone.
“Well, I should go see to the calves,” Honor said. “I’m glad Violet is feeling better. You must be relieved.”
“Thanks. I’m a happy man,” he said, his apology getting swallowed up by his pride. He stood by everything he’d said to her, but his timing and delivery was questionable. Joshua should never have barked at her when she’d showed up at the clinic simply to offer support. It had been less than gracious.
And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you. The Bible verse from Ephesians ran through his mind, serving as an admonishment for the harsh way he had treated Honor. Despite the fact that she had filed the injunction, Joshua needed to forgive her. Hadn’t he wanted the townsfolk to offer him the same grace?
Joshua watched Honor dismount from Lola and head toward the barn. He felt a knot in his stomach as his gaze trailed after her. Why did it always seem as if Honor was leaving him? Pretty soon he would be leaving Love, never to return. The ramifications of it sat heavily on his chest. The thought of never seeing Honor again made him ache inside. Despite the anger he felt tow
ard her for filing the injunction, Joshua couldn’t forget what they’d meant to each other in the past.
Joshua led Blaze toward the stables and placed him in his stall. The horse was working his mouth, letting Joshua know he’d enjoyed their ride across the property. After cleaning his tack and picking out his hooves, he treated the horse to an apple. As Joshua headed toward the house, he felt as if he was coming home. Home. He had never quite felt that way about Seattle. He’d always believed it was because he hadn’t yet bought a house to live in, but he now realized it wasn’t true. Home was a feeling. It settled inside you like a warm, comfy blanket.
Seattle didn’t have this stunning vista. He couldn’t ride to his heart’s delight at a moment’s notice. He didn’t have history there. Seattle was a blank slate. He had always considered that a good thing, but now that he was back in his hometown, he was beginning to think it might not be.
Joshua could honestly picture himself settling down here with Violet. Living at the ranch would be a dream come true. The thought served as a jolt to the system. Where had it come from? He wasn’t sticking around Love any longer than was absolutely necessary. It was silly of him to imagine a life that could never be possible. He needed to be realistic and focus on moving forward with his life, not only for his sake, but for Violet’s as well.
* * *
While she checked on Bud’s calves at the ranch, Honor tried to keep her thoughts from straying toward Joshua. Seeing him enjoying a ride on Blaze had been a little surprising. It really shouldn’t have been, considering how much he had always loved horses, but she’d convinced herself that Joshua had changed over the years from the young man she’d known.
She had been wrong. The adult version of Joshua clearly still enjoyed riding. A warm feeling settled over her at the realization that he was still the same person she had loved so dearly. Seeing him seated on Blaze took her back to all of the adventures they had enjoyed on Bud’s property. The Diamond R Ranch had been their stomping grounds. Those carefree moments were permanently seared on Honor’s heartstrings.
Her Alaskan Cowboy Page 10
