by India Amare
“Damn it,” he whispered.
“This will be ugly,” she whispered back.
They knew who I was, who my parents were, and instead of telling me they were having a conversation? Seriously? “Who am I?” I yelled as loud as I could.
Gigi blinked at me. Dray smiled a little.
“Well?”
Gigi looked at her feet. “Your mother is named Marhysa Nala. The House of Nala is allied with the House of Wren.”
Marhysa. Rhysa. I was named after my mother. “And your last name is Wren? So our families are friends?”
She nodded slowly. “Yes. It’s complicated but yes, your mother’s family and ours are friends.”
That feeling growing inside me, the one that made me feel like I had a place in the world, began to grow. I got a little caught up in it, forgetting entirely that Gigi and Dray were upset just a moment ago.
“What is it like to be a samhain? What does this mean for me?”
Dray looked at me with big, sad eyes. “I wish I could tell you that your life doesn’t have to change unless you want it to, but that would be a lie. Your life will change or else you won’t survive.”
Gigi rolled her eyes and shook her head at her brother. “He makes it sound dire. It’s not, Rhysa. Just a few changes. The biggest thing you need to understand right now is that in order to survive as a species we adapted into a collective. We literally cannot survive without each other.”
I lived my entire life alone. Dray was right. This would be a major change for me.
“It’s in our blood,” she went on, holding up her wrist. “If we don’t share our blood, we die. Samhains who remove themselves from their house, who try to live alone, they starve and go insane. That’s where humans get their stories of vampires roaming the night sucking blood from animals and human victims. It’s very rare, but it does happen.”
I thought of all the vampire stories I read over the years, of the movie franchises and television shows. “So the stories are real?”
“In a way. They’re based on some reality. Because we’re sensitive to the metaphysical world we see and sense things differently. To humans it seems like magic.”
“So you’re saying you can do magic?” I waved my hands like I was casting a spell. I really wanted to be able to do that. The blood stuff I wasn’t so sure about, but magic? Hell yeah.
She sighed. “Oh boy. It would take days to explain everything but I’ll give you the really short version. Just like humans all have slightly different gifts—one can understand music better than anyone else, while another is great with numbers or words—samhain have different gifts when it comes to the metaphysical world. For me, time is fluid. I can see it before and after me, around you and Dray. So I can see more about you and what is coming up for you, or where you’ve been, than you can see for yourself.”
“Like a psychic,” I said, starting to get this.
“Dray is very sensitive to danger and evil. Which is why I should have been smarter when he warned me I was in danger last night.” She looked up at him with apology written all over her face. “I’m so sorry.”
“Just listen to me from now on. I can’t talk my way out of hospitals all the time.”
The image of him laid out on the street flashed through my mind. “What happened last night? Why were you shot?” Maybe I had a sense for evil, too. Just thinking about it filled me with an overwhelming sense of dread. There had been evil there last night. I was sure of it.
Dray grimaced, his eyes locked on Gigi’s as if they were having a silent conversation. “Are you telepathic too?” Not gonna lie, even though I hated being left out of the conversation, I hoped telepathy was a thing. I always wanted to be like Counselor Troi on Star Trek.
“We’re not telepathic,” Gigi said. “But Dray doesn’t want to tell you what happened and I think it’s important you hear it.” She gave him one last warning glare.
He sighed and rubbed his eyes. “In some ways we’re not that different from humans. We love, we hate, we crave power. There’s an ongoing war between our house, the House of Wren, and the House of Axl. Last night they took a shot at us.”
I looked between them. “Why didn’t you want to tell me about that?”
“Tell her,” Gigi said through gritted teeth.
Dray let his hand fall to his side and met my gaze with his. Even as I saw the dread in his eyes, I reveled in the electricity that sizzled between us. Until he spoke.
“Your father was Tiynan Axl, the sole heir to the House of Axl.”
Chapter 4
“Statistical analysis of the data reveals several flaws with the methods used.”
I barely paid attention to the lecture. I should, it was probably my hardest class and the final was only days away at this point, but how could I focus on statistical data when I just found out I wasn’t what I thought I was.
Not human.
Samhain.
Gigi dropped me off near my class, insisting I needed to go about my normal routine, that sitting in my cottage wasn’t going to change what happened and there was no way I could download everything I needed to know in a day. So here I was in class secretly internet searching instead of learning.
Samhain was the Celtic celebration of the end of harvest season and the beginning of the darker days of fall and winter. All those cool Neolithic tombs I studied in the archaeology class I took sophomore year were meant to take advantage of the Samhain sunrise. All those rituals and traditions...were they based on humans witnessing the real samhain and copying them? Trying to tap into the metaphysical world the way we can?
So far I didn’t feel any different. Well, other than the crazy night of pain and unconsciousness. But as far as I knew I couldn’t see the future or transform into an animal. I also couldn’t levitate my pencil or use the force.
Maybe I was a dud.
Although, according to Dray and Gigi, I was now the sole heir to the House of Axl. That sounded powerful. And kind of bad. The people who shot Dray were evil. I felt it. And they were part of my family somehow.
My father was dead. His family was at war with my mother’s and the House of Wren. I liked Gigi and Dray a lot. They were kind and seemed to care about each other a great deal. Growing up in foster care and group homes I learned to recognize who was kind and caring and who wasn’t. So it was natural for me to trust my instincts on that.
Which meant I was wary of my father’s family.
My father. My father. I gave up the dream of ever knowing where I came from a long, long time ago. And now I had names. I’d never know the man who helped create me, but I had hope I could meet my mother. That was one of the first things I planned to ask about when we met for dinner.
I drifted through my day going through the motions, attending class but not taking notes or listening to a word of the lectures, moving through my internship without speaking to anyone, and sneaking in more internet searches every chance I got.
None of it helped though. This was information from humans. The only people who could help me right now were Gigi and Dray.
Dray brought dinner to my cottage. I popped open the first box and found a giant cheeseburger and delicious looking fries. My mouth instantly watered.
“So I guess I still eat like usual?”
He pulled out napkins and ketchup packets. “Yes. Though you may find you can eat a lot more. You’ll burn a lot more energy now, constantly interacting with the Plane.”
“The Plane?” I might need a samhain dictionary or encyclopedia, if those existed.
“The metaphysical plane. Shorthand is just The Plane.” He pushed another takeout box my way. “Gigi won’t be here for a while. Can you put this in your fridge?”
Just Dray and me? I fanned myself on the way to the fridge and lingered in the cool air for an extra moment or two. It was crazy how drawn to him I felt. Like a high-powered magnet was pulling me to him and there was no way I could break free of the invisible tractor beam.
I mean, th
ere were very good reasons for it. He was a delicious specimen of masculinity. He had that imperfect nose and rough knuckles, broad shoulders and those incredibly blue eyes. He was sexy.
But there was more and I couldn’t quite explain that part. More what?
He settled into the chair. I waited to make sure it didn’t snap under him, then took a seat on the opposite side of my little table. “I’m sure you have questions.” He took an enormous bite of the burger.
“So many. Where is my mother?” As much as I enjoyed their help, Dray and Gigi weren’t family. Maybe I would be better off starting there.
But then he set his burger down instead of finishing it off in three bites and I knew the news wouldn’t be good. “Your mother hasn’t been seen by anyone but her family in over twenty years. The last we heard, she never leaves her room. She lives in her head.”
I set my burger down too because, damn. That was really bad news. “Because of me?”
“I don’t know for sure, but after your parents tried to elope, your father was killed. Your mother has been in seclusion ever since. The only reason I know any of this is because my mother and aunts were friends with your mother.”
“Why...why do you think I was abandoned?” I was given a name and left? I didn’t understand.
Dray stared at his food for a long time, his elbows on the table and his fingers interlaced in front of his face. He looked like he wanted to make fists and punch walls and was trying very hard to not. “I think someone knew you would be very powerful and that your life would always be hard, stuck in the middle of a war you didn’t start and couldn’t stop. I think someone thought it would be merciful to let you be human.”
Well, wasn’t that a dark pit of dread.
“But you are awake now and that isn’t something anyone can ignore. You sent a mighty powerful shockwave through the Plane. Everyone everywhere felt it. You’re in the middle of it now. This is what Gigi and I were fighting over this morning. She didn’t want me to dump everything on you at once, but she’s not here and I can’t keep it from you. Your grandfather will come for you and you need to be prepared.”
“Be prepared?” my voice squeaked.
“Fuck, I wish I could download it all to you at once. Your mother’s family won’t come for you because your grandfather is too powerful to fight off. The treaty between our houses is the only thing keeping us together. We’re not prepared to fight an all-out war. Not right now. And believe me, it will take a war to keep Antyne from getting to you.” He pushed the food away and laid his hands on the table. “We can walk around the human world because we look like humans, but our world doesn’t look like the human world. We’re full of traditions and rituals and a hierarchy. Antyne Axl is the top of that hierarchy. But the good news is he can’t just swoop in and rip you out of your human life. It would draw too much attention.”
Well at least there was that.
“I want you to come home with Gigi and me this weekend. We can show you a lot of our world and how it works, so when you do go with your grandfather you at least know a little of what you’re walking into.”
I studied Dray’s hands. They were large, rough, and capable. Like he knew exactly how to use them for fighting and building things. “You make it sound like I can’t tell him to fuck off.”
Dray gave me a half smile. “You can’t live as a human anymore and no one can stand in his way. Not even me. But you can influence how much power he has over you.”
I picked my burger back up. “Well with all this wonderful news, tell me about your family. How many siblings do you have and how is Gigi sixty-six? How old are you?”
He let some of the tension in his shoulders go and laughed a little, pulling his food back in front of him. “I’m seventy-one.”
I froze with the burger in my mouth, teeth just about to sink into the bun.
He laughed harder. “We age much slower than humans. Instead of living to be ninety, samhain often live to be three hundred.”
Three. Hundred.
Would I live that long or did being human for the first twenty years kill that option?
“I have four brothers and four sisters. We have an unusually large family. Most only have one, maybe two children. It’s part of why your grandfather finds us so dangerous. He has one heir, we have nine.”
Nine. I lived in several homes with nine or ten children but I had a feeling the Wren family had a very different experience with that many kids. “Who's the oldest?”
He paused with a fry near his lips. “Me. Then Bo—whose full name is Bhoreymus—Leena, Georgiahana, Krysippa, Aethel, Vicerus, Bridge, and Cassandrha.”
Of course he was the oldest. He acted like an oldest child. Stoic, in charge, paternal. I remembered the way he herded Gigi and Bo into the bookshop. “How long do I have?”
His gaze locked with mine. “If it were Gigi, I’d already be here.”
But he had that overwhelming protector vibe about him. I had no doubt his family meant everything to him and he’d fight tooth and nail for their happiness.
He played with his fries. “You have to finish your semester. When he comes, tell him that. It will buy you time.”
Of course. That made perfect sense.
“How are you feeling?”
I scanned my body, hoping to find a new super power or an urge to cast spells, but I still felt like regular old Rhysa. “Fine. Surprisingly.”
“Good. I’d like to keep it that way.” He closed up his now empty box and pushed it away. “Last night wasn’t enough. It was a good start, but you’ll need more blood. We can do that now if you’re comfortable being alone with me.”
I was already alone with him. But I had a feeling—novice that I was—that this involved being a lot closer. My body vibrated with anticipation. “I’m comfortable.”
“Good. And this time you’ll be conscious, so I can teach you what to do.” He said all of this softly and without making full eye contact.
Was he as nervous as I was? Did he feel what I felt? This pull? “I have a lot to learn, don’t I?”
“You’ll get there. We might be most comfortable on your bed.”
My bed. Oh god. “Of course.” I stood up and moved through the door that separated my kitchen and living space from my bedroom and bathroom, then stood awkwardly beside the hastily made bed.
We looked close in age but the reality that Dray was fifty years older than me really hit me right then. Fifty more years of living. And loving? Did he have a partner? Was he married?
“Are you married?” I blurted out.
He froze at the foot of the bed. “No, Rhysa. I’m not. I’ve never been married.”
Okay. That was good at least. “What do I do first?” I felt so naive and kind of ridiculous. Did he see me as a child?
Ugh. Why couldn’t I turn off my brain?
“Why don’t you sit with your back against the wall?”
My bed was tucked into the corner. It made the most sense for space reasons, and now apparently for sitting up in bed. I maneuvered across the mattress sitting near the center but a little closer to the headboard.
Dray sat beside me, the mattress dipping several inches as he moved close to me. “Wrists are an easy way to start. Your saliva has a numbing agent, so if you lick along my wrist first, I won’t feel a thing when you sink your teeth into my skin.”
He held his hand up in front of me, offering himself to me. It seemed innocent and not at the same time.
I took his hand and forearm in my hands, meeting his gaze. He gave me a nod, so I licked his skin. A shiver raced down my spine, my mouth watered, and my canines ached for a moment. Then I flicked my tongue along them and realized they’d elongated.
“Open your mouth and sink your teeth into my wrist. Then suck, Rhysa.” Did his voice waver? It sure sounded that way to me.
I couldn’t resist or think about whether I was nervous for another second. Instinct took over. My mouth was on his skin and then my teeth and the next thing I kne
w my eyes rolled back in my head as I drank from Dray like I was starving. My entire body heated and I really wished I could rip all my clothes off, but I couldn’t spare a second to do such a thing.
At first I gave in to it all. I didn’t have much choice. The natural urges and the apparent need I had for blood consumed me. But after a bit the fog cleared a little. I was aware of the noises I made, of the uneven breaths coming from Dray.
I pulled back, licking his skin again and marveling at how quickly he healed. “Am I hurting you?”
“No. Of course not.”
He sure looked like he was in pain. I waited, showing him I didn’t believe him for a second.
His eyes roamed my face. “It’s just taking a lot to hold myself back.”
“From?” My heart beat harder.
“From sinking into you.”
I forced myself to breathe. “Is that normal?”
“It’s normal to share, yes. To take and give at the same time, or in turns.”
It sounded an awful lot like he was being careful to only mention what was normal. “What else? There’s something you’re not saying.”
He picked up a lock of my hair and rubbed it between his fingers. “Why do I feel like I know you?”
He said something similar the night we met. Have we met before? I swallowed because I was overwhelmed by everything, but mostly him. “I don’t know,” I finally whispered.
He froze, fingers on my hair, muscles locked from his neck to his biceps, only his eyes rising to meet mine. “I dream about you.” He blinked in surprise, his eyes returning to my hair and then back to my eyes. “I’ve dreamt about this for years.”
“You’ve dreamt about me? Like this? Here?” I swear I could hear everything. My heartbeat and his, every ragged breath, the air around us even seemed to hum.
“Just like this,” he murmured, transfixed and maybe a little confused. He seemed completely floored by this realization.
