by JA Low
“What Stacey said to you, is it true? Do you want to go back to LA?”
“No. God, no, my life is with Stacey and now with you guys. Where ever that is.”
“Why did she think you don’t want to live here?” Amelia pushes.
“Honestly?” I look at her, she nods in agreement. “I had a moment on the phone to my mom.” I cringe saying that because Ameila won’t ever get to do that. “It was the first morning here. It was all a little overwhelming. I’ve never been anywhere like this before.”
“So you would live here?” Amelia waves her arms around the small kitchen.
“Of course. It’s what’s best for you guys.” She taps her fingers on the counter.
“What happens if we don’t want to stay here?” My head tilts, I’m confused.
“What do you mean? You don’t want to stay in this house?” Amelia nods.
“We can buy a new one if you don’t want to stay here anymore.” I try to reassure her.
“My sisters and I were talking last night. We don’t want to stay here.”
“Okay. I can talk to Stacey about it. But let’s not make any hasty decisions while you are grieving.” I really need to talk to Stacey about all this.
“If we wanted to move to America, can we stay with you?” My body stills.
“You want to move to LA?” She nods her head. “Why?” I’m even more confused.
“There are opportunities there.”
“Do you not like your town?” Amelia shakes her head.
“Ever since people found out you and Stacey are together, they started treating my sisters and I differently. We’re outcasts. Kids are assholes,” Amelia states. What? They are getting picked on because of me.
“Do we need to talk to your principal or teachers or something?” This is so far out of my realm of expertise.
“There’s nothing left for us here, Oscar.”
“What about your memories?” Amelia shakes her head.
“We want a fresh start. Growing up in a small town and having a tragedy that follows you around…people stare and they talk. They pity you. We will always be known as the kids who lost their family. They have already started to treat us differently.” I did notice it when we went into town, but I just thought I was reading into it too much. “Can you talk to Aunt Stacey about this?” Wow. I had no idea.
“Maybe now isn’t the right time, especially after last night. Let’s get through the next couple of days and then I promise I’ll speak to her about it.” Amelia gives me a weak smile. Let’s get through the funeral before we start changing everyone’s lives.
“Thanks for listening, Oscar. Stacey’s lucky to have you in her life.” Her words hit me and my heart blooms with love for this family. Amelia turns on her heel and shuffles back to her room. Moments later the screen door creaks open and Stacey walks in.
“Morning, babe.” I keep my voice normal.
“You’re not going to yell at me?” Stacey looks at me in shock, tears welling in her eyes.
“Baby, why would I yell at you?”
“Because I was an epic bitch last night.” She turns on her heels and rushes back outside again. I chase after her.
“Stacey. Wait.” I catch up to her.
“How can you not hate me?” Tears fall down her cheeks. I grab her face between my palms and kiss her salty tears from her cheeks.
“I could never hate you, little one. You’re my everything.” Stacey collapses into my arms crying. “Shh, baby. Shh, it’s going to be okay, I promise.” Stacey hiccups on a sob.
“I can’t do this without you, Oscar. I can’t.”
“I’m never leaving you. You hear me. If I have to become a sheep farmer and battle snakes and spiders and whatever other animals that can kill you in Australia I will do that.” This makes her smile.
“Wow. You must really love you me.” She laughs through her sobs.
“I do, little one, I do. And I’m sorry you heard that moment of weakness with my mom. The stupid chickens had just woken me up, not to mention all the fucking flies that want to impregnate my mouth. I was just a little overwhelmed by all this.” I look out over the red barren desert.
“I guess it is a little confronting.” At least this gets me a genuine smile. “I’m sorry, babe.”
“You have nothing to apologize for. You’re going through so much at the moment.”
“It’s not an excuse to be a bitch to you.”
“I can give you a spanking if you want.” I nuzzle into her neck which make her giggle.
“As tempting as that sounds, there isn’t a moment of alone time in these houses.” This is so true.
“Guess, I will just keep a score of how many spankings I owe you and when the time is right, I’ll deliver them.” She shivers ever so faintly. Now isn’t really the time for getting our kink on but I need her to know when the time does come she better watch out.
“Thank you.” She wraps her arms around my neck.
“Apology accepted. But never ever sleep apart from me again, do you hear me?” She nods her head eagerly. “I hated us being apart.”
“Me too.
31
Oscar
“Is everyone ready?” Stacey asks. The kids all nod somberly. Tonight they are scattering their family’s ashes underneath the big gum tree which overlooks the damn. Apparently they used to have family picnics by its banks and it was the family’s favorite spot. The funeral was yesterday and the whole community came out for it. Hundreds of people attended and paid their respects to the Ferguson/Davies family. The kids held up surprisingly well, as did Stacey. Not going to lie, seeing four coffins was heartbreaking. I can’t imagine nor do I want to imagine being in Stacey’s shoes. Just the thought of it kills me.
We jump into the farm Ute, all the kids piling into the back, each of the older kids holding an urn each. We make the journey out to the old gum tree. I help the girls out of the Ute; they dust themselves off and head toward the tree. There is an old picnic table sitting beside the now dried up bank of the damn. The sun is beginning to set as we all stop and look out over the landscape. Four kangaroos hop buy along the horizon.
“Did you see that?” Hunter points to the kangaroos.
“There are four,” Emma counts.
“That’s a sign.” Stacey smiles. The family all hold hands taking in the moment. “Does anyone want to say any words?”
“Love you, Mum, Dad, Pop and Gran, Amelia starts.
“Miss you all.” Emma sniffles. Becca shakes her head, she’s overcome with emotion.
“Look, star.” Lockie points to the lone star rising in the orange streaked sky.
“They’re going home.” Stacey smiles to herself. “Are you all ready?” She looks nervously over at her family. They all nod. “Goodbye, guys. We hope you are happy together. Miss you all. I promise to look after everyone,” Stacey says through her tears. Then one by one they each pour the ashes out, the wind taking them and scattering them across the red earth. The four kangaroos stay on the horizon until the very last spec of ash has blown away. They bound off into the darkness once it’s all done.
“I can’t believe it’s over,” Hunter says to the group. His sisters rush around him as they have a moment.
It’s been a couple of days since the funeral and Amelia has asked me to call a family meeting in regards to their wishes to leave and come back to America. Thankfully, Sienna and Derrick are still here, but they leave tomorrow.
“Hey.” I stick my head into Stacey’s parents’ house where she is sorting things out with Derrick and Sienna. “The kids want a family meeting in five.” Her eyes widen, but she follows me.
“What’s going on?” The concern is evident in her voice.
“It’s all good. The girls just want to talk to you.” I don’t think that relaxes her. We walk back into the other house where the girls are sitting at the dining room table. Hunter is playing cars with Lockie on the floor. He has no idea what this meeting is about either.
>
“Is everything okay?” Stacey asks them.
“We just want to talk about what happens next,” Amelia tells her. Stacey looks over at me and I indicate for her to sit down.
“Just hear them out before you say anything,” I warn her and Hunter. This gets Hunter’s attention and he moves from the floor to the table with them. Derrick and Sienna decide to sit with Lockie to entertain him while we all chat. The girls look nervous.
“We’ve been talking,” Amelia starts, she looks over at me for help. “Oscar can you…?” Wow, I’m flattered that they are seeking my help with this. Maybe I don’t suck too much at this adulting business.
“The girls would like to talk to you about maybe living somewhere else.”
“What the fuck?” Hunter raises his voice.
“Hunter!” Stacey scolds him.
“You can’t be serious. They want to move. Our parents have only been gone for two weeks and they are all ready to forget them.” The girls burst out crying. Stacey quickly consoles them.
“Hunter!” My voice rises loudly. He shrinks a little at my tone. “I asked you to listen to them. It took them a huge amount of courage to talk to me about this. Now I am asking you to respectively hear them out.” I look over but the girls are really upset. Hunter was way too harsh on them. “The girls would like to talk to you about maybe considering a move back to LA.” The room falls silent. Hunter looks shocked.
“You want to leave?” he asks his sisters.
“You have no idea, Hunter. We are sick of being bullied. We are sick of the kids making fun of us. We just want a new life,” Amelia shouts
“You’re getting bullied?” Stacey asks them.
“Because we’re different now,” Amelia tells her.
“What do you mean?”
“Because you’re with me,” I tell her. Stacey’s eyes widen.
“People are bulling you, because of me?” You can see the hurt registering on Stacey’s face.
“They think we are too good for them because we hang out with ‘celebrities’, Emma adds.
“You know how small this town is, Stace. Any little thing that makes you different makes you a target.” Amelia snuggles closer into Stacey.
“I had no idea.” Stacey is stunned.
“Mum never wanted to tell you. She thought it would make you feel bad,” Emma tells her.
“Of course I feel bad, why wouldn’t I? I’m the reason people are bullying you all.”
“Tell her,” Becca whispers to her sister.
“No,” Amelia says back.
“Tell me what?” Stacey looks between them.
“I swallowed some pills last year.” Ameila’s voice is barely a whisper as she confesses her secret.
“What?” Stacey’s raises her voice.
“It was stupid. Nothing happened. I just didn’t know what to do.” Amelia shrugs.
“Oh, Mia, I’m so sorry. So, so sorry,” Stacey cries.
“I don’t want to go back to school, Stacey. Please,” Amelia begs. Stacey turns to me looking lost. “It’s going to be so much worse. Everyone is going to treat us differently.”
“I don’t think your mum would want me to pull you from school,” she tells her niece.
“They couldn’t afford the private school. They looked into it.”
“Why did they not ask me for the money? I would have helped.”
“The same reason you won’t let Oscar help you. Being stubborn is a family trait,” Amelia tells her Aunt.
“Where do you want to go?” Hunter asks quietly.
“I said they could live with us,” I tell them.
“Oscar!” Stacey gasps.
“I told them it would be up to you to decide, but they are welcome to live with us. We can even look at maybe purchasing a new house.”
“Oscar,” she says my name again with a stunned tone.
“It’s not his fault, Aunt Stacey. We asked him,” Amelia confesses.
“I think Oscar and I need to have a talk about this.” Stacey glares at me.
“You can’t be serious? Hunter questions her. “You’re seriously thinking about moving everyone to LA?”
“I said I need to talk to Oscar about it.”
“I don’t understand.” Hunter rakes his hand through his hair.
“You can stay,” Amelia tells him. Hunter glares at her before turning on his heel and walks out the door.
“I’ll get him.” I rush after him.
“Hey, buddy.” He ignores me. I grab his arm and he goes to take a swing at me. “You wanna hit me, tough guy?” He takes another swing at me, his punch getting me in the side. “Come on, again,” I goad him. Hunter swings violently at me, but I easily defend myself. He tries over and over and over again until he can’t lift his arms and falls into a puddle of tears. I wrap myself around him as he sobs. “Don’t be angry at them.”
“But how can they leave it all behind.”
“They just want a fresh start. Sounds like they have been having a bad time.” He looks defeated.
“But what about Mum and Dad, Gran and Pop?”
“We can keep this place. It will always be yours. Just because they aren’t with us anymore doesn’t mean the memories fade.”
“I feel like we are abandoning them.”
“No, you’re not. They will always be with you, no matter where you are.”
“You know Amelia is going to want a car? She’s turning sixteen this year.” This makes me chuckle.
“She’s going to have to get that past her Aunt first. I’m the easy one.” Hunter smiles at my comment.
“I’m sorry about hitting you.”
“It’s all good. But go easy on your sisters. It took them a lot of courage today to tell everyone about what they have been going through.” Hunter hangs his head.
“I had no idea it was that bad or that Amelia was so unhappy.”
“Yeah. That was scary to hear.” We sit in the dirt in silence.
“I guess it wouldn’t be so bad to go back.” I raise my brow at him.
“Really?” He nods.
“As long as we are all together, that’s all that matters.” I ruffle his hair.
“You’re a good kid, Hunter Davies.” He gives me a smile.
32
Stacey
The kids have gone to bed early after such an emotional afternoon. I had no idea the girls were getting bullied because I’m with Oscar. I’m even more shocked that Amelia took a bunch of pills because of it. God, I wish my mother was here to guide me. On one hand I want to make the girls happy but on the other I wonder if I should just change the girls’ school instead of their country.
Sienna, Derrick, Oscar and I are sitting on the back veranda, drinking beer and looking out into the darkness.
“That was a bit intense,” Derrick starts the conversation.
“I feel so bad for the girls,” Sienna adds.
“I don’t know what to do.” I confess.
“You should get married and adopt the kids.” Derrick states as he sips his beer. Oscar practically chokes on his and I’m just as stunned. “What? You’re already engaged. You’re going to court next month to finalize guardianship of them.”
“It’s not that simple, D,” I tell him.
“Yes it is. Oscar has enough money to hire good lawyers to speed up everything. The kids are having a crap time at school. Amelia has already had a bad brush with depression and suicide, it seems. The kids are telling you they want a fresh start. Don’t you think they deserve that? I’ve seen the way people in town look at your family. Everyone is awkward. You can see the pity. The kids pick up on all that shit. They’ve been through so much already.” Does Derrick actually have a point? “You would have support back home with all of us being there. You wouldn’t be alone.” He reminds me. I look over at Oscar who is nodding in agreement. It has been a fear of mine being stuck out here; just Oscar and I. We don’t know how to parent, well maybe I don’t. Oscar has done some pretty awesome
parenting with regards to the girls. Especially as they felt comfortable enough to talk to him first about this.
“It will take a month or two to get your paperwork for the US ready. In that time, apply for a marriage license and you can get married after thirty days. It’s done. You’re a family. Then you can make a new life in America.” Has Derrick gone slightly insane?
“It might help our case being married,” Oscar adds.
“Ragnar, what the fuck? That’s not romantic,” Derrick tells him. Oscar turns to me.
“Stacey Ferguson. I love you with all my heart. What we have been through these past couple of weeks has only brought us closer together. It has made me realize what is important in my life, and that is you.” Oscar is down on one knee again. “Will you marry me in thirty days?” My heart is racing. He can’t be serious.
“Do it. Do it. Do it,” Derrick chants.
“Yes. Let’s do this.” Derrick and Sienna cheer us. Oscar picks me up and kisses me.
“You sure about this?” I ask him one last time.
“Fuck, yes.”
The End
You can continue Oscar and Stacey’s story in Suddenly Complete.
33
Stacey
I watch as the bright orange streaks light up the horizon. The birds’ morning call echoes all around us. I sip my freshly brewed coffee on the front veranda overlooking the house garden. Oscar is in there collecting the eggs from the chickens; his morning ritual. He’s really started to embrace this way of life, working on the land, seeing the fruits of his labor. Every morning he’s up at dawn, the bright sunlight making it hard to sleep in any further. Once dressed, and while it’s still cool, he goes for a run around the family’s house garden which connects the two homes via a wonderful green path, it's about a couple if acres in size. He’s mentioned he’s not brave enough to venture further after he and Don, our next door neighbor, ran into a brown snake while moving a wood heap. Oscar definitely milks that ‘near death’ experience, as he calls it, with me. I’m always happy to get on my knees for him, because that man has been my rock through all of this. I might not have been able to see it through my consuming grief this past month, but it’s been there in the simple things like putting the kettle on in the morning so it’s boiled by the time I get up, by taking the kids to school most mornings, helping me sort through my family’s clothing and belongings, holding me when I would catch a whiff of my mother’s perfume amongst her clothes and the grief would overwhelm me again. He has been my rock.
