"I think she's intimidated. You know with the bald head, all those damn muscles, and…well, you can look a bit scary when you're in full Dom mode. I've seen more experienced women than Kelly walk away from your scenes in the dungeon."
Bradley had noticed that as well. He never claimed his play was light, and he never played with anyone who didn't know what they were getting themselves into. Even with Erin, he had laid it all out there for her. He was hard, unrelenting, and damn demanding when it came to submission. Hard Dom, yeah, but he’d never once hid that from his partners.
"Kelly has nothing to fear from me. She's not mine to deal with. And she should have enough faith in Erin to know she wouldn't be doing something she didn't want or enjoy."
"I told her all those things," Kendrick said. "On the car ride home, on the elevator ride to our apartment—she's a little stubborn."
Bradley put his head back and laughed. "A little. Right."
Kendrick took a glance at his watch. "Well, I'm going to go get my redheaded dragon and head out. I just wanted to let you know about Jonathan."
"Thanks."
"As much of an ass as Jonathan is, he really doesn't stand to win anything by messing with you or Erin," Kendrick pointed out. “Then again, who knows with him. He's obviously not the guy we all thought he was."
"Erin probably felt the same way when this all went down," Bradley mused out loud. She really hadn't talked much about him at all when he really thought about it. Could she still be missing him? Still trying to get over him, and that's why she went alone to meet him? After all, he was the rebound guy, that's what he'd signed up for at the beginning. Maybe things never developed past that for her as he’d hoped they would.
"I haven't known Erin for as long as everyone else, but one thing I've always noticed about her is her reservation. She was always willing to jump into a fire to help someone else, but when it came to her own stuff, she pulled back. Like she didn't want to be a bother in some way. Kelly said she's always been that way, kind of pushing herself into the background."
"And when this whole mess with Jonathan happened, she did it again. Only to the extreme," Bradley said to complete the story. His little pet wasn't very good at hiding her feelings, so she would hide herself instead.
"Yeah, for a while, it was hard to get a hold of her, and when the girls did, she would be really distant, and that was before Jonathan left. So, I'm sure things were messy for a while and she was just trying to wait it out, hoping things would turn out okay in the end."
"She's listing her house for sale," Bradley said, letting out a breath of air.
"She moving in here permanently?" Bradley didn't miss the skepticism in Kendrick's voice.
"I don't know, but for the first time in my life, the idea doesn't make me want to bar the doors and windows. You know? How can someone edge their way into your life so easily and so fucking fast?" He ran a hand over his head. Since when did he become so wishy-washy about a woman?
Kendrick laughed. "I know that look. And I sure as hell know that feeling. My advice is don't overthink it. Nothing you can do about it anyway."
"That's reassuring. Thanks." He narrowed his gaze. Of course there was nothing he could about it. He'd finally found someone he wanted to wake up next to every morning. She'd stumbled into his life, but he was damn sure he wasn't going to let her waltz out of it.
The first thing on his to-do list for the day became completely clear: hire a moving truck to move all of her shit into his house immediately.
Chapter 25
"I don't understand." Kelly's thick curls swayed as she shook her head. They seemed to be having the same conversation over and over again.
"I already explained all of this." Erin groaned while she picked the chicken out of her cobb salad. Kelly had insisted on meeting for lunch after spending a whirlwind of a morning with her.
"I wasn't there, so explain again." Jessica turned her phone to vibrate and placed it in the center of the table.
"I don't think I can do this. This…you know, this thing." Erin's cheeks burned with a new blush. Why couldn't they understand what she was saying without making her actually say it out loud? Didn't they know how embarrassing it all was?
"What? Sell the house? Break up with Jonathan? Date Bradley?" Jessica sipped her diet coke. The sound of the lunch rush happening around them covered any concern they'd be overheard.
"Yes. All of it. I mean, no, not the Jonathan thing. That's a done deal, and really, it was for the best." And for the first time, she said the words without any hesitation or conflicted feelings.
"Okay, then let's take this all one step at a time." Kelly moved her chicken salad sandwich to the side and folded her hands on the table—her signature getting-down-to-business move. "Do you still want to live in the suburbs? I mean, it's a long ass way from work, your family doesn't live out there, and we are all in the city. You make enough money to live in the city if you want, so that's not a reason to stay out there." Kelly ticked off the reasons finger by finger.
"No, I don't really want to stay out there." Talking about her living arrangements meant dealing with Bradley. She managed to avoid him that morning, taking off for work right after Kelly and Kendrick left. He tried to waylay her, but she told him she had a meeting she couldn't miss. It wasn't a total lie. She did have plans to meet with a client she'd been pushing off, but she could have moved it if needed.
"Okay, so that solves the house problem. That leaves Bradley." Jessica spoke in a hushed tone, dancing up to the subject.
"Bradley is great," Erin said with conviction. He was. Bradley could not have been more of anything she would want in a man. He was strong, dependable, responsible, and loving, and would hold her all night and let her sob on his best shirt if she needed it. The man was downright perfect.
"I feel a but coming any second now," Kelly said.
"Well, you don't like him." Erin pointed to her. Yep, use Kelly as scapegoat, good plan!
"No, don't put this on me. It's not that I don't like him. He's just more than I could handle. I'm not his biggest fan at the moment. He got my butt busted last night."
Jessica laughed. "No, he didn't. You did that with your damn mouth."
"Wait. What?" Still the outsider.
"You didn't tell her?" Jessica gave Kelly a dark look. "You were there this morning and didn't mention it?"
"When I got there, she looked all puffy. She'd been crying, so I figured, you know, worry about her sore ass before mine."
"You're doing it again," Erin grumbled, then shoveled a piece of chicken into her mouth.
Both women at least had the decency to blush. "I'm sorry. We really do need to do better about that." Jessica placed a hand on Erin's arm.
"Just tell me what happened." Erin wiped a drop of dressing from her lips and eyed Kelly.
"Well, after I let the cat out of the bag—and again, next time, tell me first—I got a little mouthy. I might have raised my voice at Bradley, and it's really quite possible I said he was cruel. Kendrick took exception to me saying that."
"Cruel?" Erin clenched her hands in her lap. "He's not cruel. I mean, it felt that way last night, but afterwards, he just held me. Let me slobber all over him, then took me home and tucked me into bed. I mean, it felt a little childish, but he tucked me in and kissed me goodnight. I felt more intimacy in that moment with Bradley than I ever had with Jonathan."
When she finally finished speaking, she plopped a cherry tomato in her mouth and chewed while Jessica and Kelly exchanged a glance.
"But you aren't sure if you should date him?" Kelly asked with a wrinkled brow.
"Didn't you just hear what I said?" Erin asked with irritation. Did she really need to spell it out for them?
"This must be what's it's like talking to me when I'm all blubbery. Royce has the patience of a saint." Jessica took a deep breath. "Erin, if he's so great, why would you question dating him?"
"Because obviously he's going to get sick of me real quick." Er
in rolled her eyes. "He's so experienced, and I'm still getting my feet wet. I suck at this. I mean, I thought it was what I wanted. I mean it is, I think. But I suck at it."
"At what?" Kelly asked again, blowing an errant strand of hair out of her eyes.
"This…" Erin pointed at the two of them, then back at herself. "You know, being what we are." Still seeing the confusion on their faces, she hissed the word. "Submissive."
"Oh!" Kelly slapped the table and laughed. "That's not a problem. I mean, of course you suck at it, you just started to realize what you want. It's just that you're new. Hell, I still suck at it. That's when Kendrick just yanks me back into line."
"Yeah. Royce isn't exactly handing me any perfect sub medal any time soon. If we were perfect at it, wouldn't it be kind of boring? Every relationship has ups and downs. Someone screws up, then it gets worked out. Vanilla or kinky doesn't change that part. Just how it gets worked out."
They obviously didn't understand. Erin tried to explain it again. "A true submissive wouldn't have lied like I did yesterday."
"First off, there's no such thing as a true submissive." Kelly pointed a finger at her with dark eyes. "I hate that term. It's not real. Everyone is different, every relationship is different."
"Yeah, I mean, Kelly would probably pee her pants if Bradley came up to her with one of his floggers in his hand."
"Hey," Kelly moved her pointed finger, aiming it at Jessica, "that's not my fault, that man looks terrifying."
Erin wanted to laugh. He did look rather scary when he was dressed for play—hell, even when he wasn't dressed for play. His eyes portrayed so much about his intentions, and his intentions were never covered in rainbow dust. Why didn't he terrify her when he looked at her with such intensity? Shouldn't someone who had such fire in his expression scare her? The kinkiest activity she participated in before him was doggystyle.
Yet, with Bradley, seeing him stalk her with a flogger in hand, his eyes narrowed, and his jaw set tight always melted her insides. When he called her pet or yanked on her hair, her body responded as though he'd stroked it with his hands. The harshness of his slaps, the clamps, the whippings, all drove her closer to her end than any bouquet of flowers or kiss could possibly hope to achieve.
Something was obviously wrong with her. She'd lost her mind.
"She's overthinking," Kelly whispered as she sipped her drink.
"Erin, listen to us. One of us should be able to get through this part unscathed, and you are lucky to have two experienced burn victims to learn from." Jessica patted her hand. "Don't think too deeply about the whys and what ifs."
"I wasn't." She tried to smile through the lie, but Kelly pinched her. "Hey!"
"Well, you weren't listening." Kelly shrugged and pushed her soda away from her. "If I drink much more of this, I'm going to blow up like a balloon."
Erin's phone buzzed on the table, and she hesitated before she picked it up. What would she say if Bradley asked her why she'd rushed out of the house that morning? What if he wanted to talk about what happened? She wasn’t ready for the conversation yet, and she couldn’t lie to him. Not again.
A wave of relief hit her when she read the notification reminding her of her afternoon meeting.
"What's that about?" Kelly jerked a thumb in her direction while asking Jessica the question.
"I'm guessing she was afraid Bradley was beckoning her, but it turned out to be something else. Which both relieved her, but then disappointed her. You see how her shoulders sort of slumped after she read her screen?" Jessica waved a pointed finger toward Erin.
"The two of you are really annoying, you know that?" Erin tried to keep a straight face but couldn't manage it. "It was just a reminder. I have a new client meeting me this afternoon. Some big company that manufactures security systems wants new branding. We're going over some ideas for the logo."
"Anything to keep from dealing with Bradley, right?" Jessica smiled.
"Hey, that reminds me. I heard Kendrick talking with Bradley about the stalker situation. Have you gotten any more funny letters?" Kelly sat back in her seat, her arms folded over her chest.
"No. I'm sure it was just a screwball. I mean, it was so stupid, like I could break into Bradley's computer to get his financials. I'm not worried."
"You aren't thinking of going after the stalker on your own, are you?" Kelly's eyes narrowed. "I mean, you aren't hiding that you got some secret letter and have the brilliant idea to take them on by yourself?"
"No, Kelly." Erin sighed heavily. "I'm not reliving your adventure. No thank you. Besides, that would probably be a sure-fire way to get Bradley to finally realize he's too out of my league and dump my ass at the first Metra stop he could find."
"I don't understand where these doubts are coming from. I mean, is it because of Jonathan?"
"No. I mean, who knows. One guy woke up and realized I wasn't worth his time. What's to stop the next guy from doing the same thing?" Erin slipped her phone into her purse while pulling out the bills to pay her tab. "Look. It's fine. I'm fine. I'm just having a day, okay? Bradley was supposed to be a rebound guy, maybe that's all it was supposed to be." Erin dropped her money in the center of the table and stood up.
"I think he'd take you back to that office of his if he heard you talking like that," Kelly said. "I may think he's a bit more than I could handle, but I can't deny what he's done for you. You've really come out of your comfort zone, and look how much you've grown. I mean, you're out to lunch with us in the middle of a work day. You wouldn't have done that before. And you wouldn't have put yourself out there at the auction. Face it—Bradley is good for you."
Erin swallowed the knot in her throat and took a deep breath in. "That may be true, but what's he getting out of it? Nothing. Look, I have to go meet this woman. From what I hear, she's a real bear."
"Okay." Jessica gave a sympathetic smile. "You call us if you need to talk, okay? I know you are doubting everything right now, but I promise you, things will be clearer after you talk to him. So talk to him."
"Yeah. Thanks." Erin slipped her purse over her shoulder and gave a little wave before she left for her meeting.
Talk to him. Right. They'd have a long talk, and he'd tell her she was thinking too much, when she might be the only one thinking at all.
* * *
Her client had already arrived when Erin ran through the door of Pete's Coffee. At least she assumed it was her client sitting in the back of the shop, her fingers typing over her phone with more agitation than Erin would think being a minute late would warrant.
"Ms. Hoffman?" Erin bobbled her purse and her bag as they slipped from her shoulder at the exact moment she reached her hand out toward the woman.
When the woman looked up at her, Erin felt a twist in her stomach. She looked very familiar. She'd seen her somewhere before. Short blonde curly hair, deep green eyes, and perfectly applied made up, nearly perfect complexion. She'd seen this look before.
"Erin!" A warm smile spread over her berry red lips. She stood up from her seat, leaving her phone on the table.
"Yes. Hi. I'm so sorry I'm late."
"Oh, no. You're not. I'm just early." She waved a petite hand through the air before using it to grip Erin's outreached hand. "Sit. Sit."
Erin slid her bags from her shoulder and plopped into the chair across from her. "I'm sorry, but you just look so familiar." Erin studied her for another moment. "Really familiar. Have we worked together before?"
Claudia's smile slipped a fraction before quickly recovering. "No, I don't think so." She tilted her head to one side. "I think I would remember you."
"Hmmm…well..." Erin brushed the subject away, though the nagging sensation didn't lessen as they began talking about Claudia's company and her need for a new branding.
After they both finished their drinks, Claudia sighed at her watch. "Oh, shoot. I have another meeting across town I need to get to."
"Oh." Erin looked at her phone for the time. They'd only been talking
for twenty minutes. Surely she could have scheduled more time for the initial meeting. "Um…okay. We can schedule something for later in the week?"
"Or…well, this may seem a bit needy, but I really want to start getting this new logo and all that up as soon as possible. I'm going way across town, which will take at least a half hour at this time of day. Come with me? We can chat on the way, and my driver can bring you back to your office afterwards."
Erin looked at her phone again. Still no message from Bradley, and technically her work day still had another two hours left. "Sure. That works. Let me tell my boss I won't be back in the office for a while." She quickly shot a text to the office.
The two women walked the short distance to the car waiting on the corner of the street. Erin slid into the backseat while Claudia made a phone call. Erin couldn't hear what she was saying, but she could have sworn she heard her name being used. Maybe she was just telling one of her business partners the meeting had gone mobile.
When Claudia settled into the car, Erin continued to wrack her brain about where she knew her from. It wasn't a random place. She'd seen her, really seen her, somewhere. Claudia scrolled through her phone and frowned. It was then it hit Erin.
"Top Floor!" Erin called out triumphantly.
Claudia slowly turned her gaze from her phone to Erin. The once warm, inviting smile curled into a chilly stare. "What did you say?"
"Where I know you from," Erin repeated with much less vigor.
"Yes." Claudia nodded, then went back to her phone.
"You were talking with Bradley. You know him." Erin's throat tightened. The little hairs on her neck began to stiffen.
"Yes. I do." She tapped out another message on her phone. "And you have been a big enough nuisance already. I would appreciate if you would shut the fuck up for the rest of the ride."
Liberated Heart: Windy City Book Three Page 21
