“You must be thinking hard about where to put these.”
She blinked. She hadn’t been thinking about it at all. The expression on his face, part concern, part question, said he knew it.
“I’m sorry.” She studied the tree. “Are there two more?”
“Yes.” He held up one in each hand.
She quickly found them spots and checked the time. Ten minutes had slipped by.
His hand put warm pressure on her shoulder, and she turned to face him. His fingers moved slightly. A caress or reassurance. “Are you okay?”
She opened her eyes wide and nodded quickly, trying to look sincere. “Of course.”
His fingers tightened for a moment, and she thought she felt his thumb brush the corner of her jaw just below her ear. She shivered, but resisted the urge to wrap her arms around herself.
“I thought maybe this was bringing back bad memories or something.”
“No. Not at all.” Her cursed feminine heart was trying to make new ones. With him, who was totally unsuspecting that she basically had a ring on his finger and him in her living room for the next fifty years. What a time for her mind to go all domestic. She’d spent most of her life telling herself that men couldn’t be counted on, that they’d leave and that she didn’t need a man anyway, and now, now, her whole body was going to rebel. Wonderful.
“Yep. I’m sure.” Her answer sounded breathy and fake. His forehead wrinkled. Seconds ticked by as they stared at each other.
She pushed past him to where the boxes sat. His hand dropped, making her shoulder feel cold, and her heart colder.
She cleared her throat, praying her voice came out sounding normal. “Let’s get these other ones out. We’re running out of time.”
He turned with her and they opened the second of the larger boxes. Light brown, square, wooden candle holders filled it. Gator lifted two out carefully.
Avery refused to look at his hands. She definitely couldn’t allow herself to wish them back on her shoulders. She eyed the decorations, then considered the time. They had to have them hung and lit before the bell rang.
She put a finger to her lips and tapped. “How about you help me place the upper ones that I can’t reach, then I’ll take over while you insert the candles and light them?”
“You’re the expert.” His back was toward her and she couldn’t see his face, but he sounded sincere.
She showed him where she wanted to place the first one. He secured the heavier ornament with the wire attached to the back. They were ingenious if she did say so. It was hard to believe a high schooler came up with the idea, although Mrs. Franks said they’d only used them one year because of the risk of fire.
“On that branch.” She pointed to a stronger-looking branch than the one she had indicated previously. The symmetry was still good. She actually liked her decorations to look more natural, but she’d assume the judges would prefer balance and proportion.
He stretched and reached the branch she indicated while she admired the ripple of his shirt and how it stretched over his shoulders.
This was crazy. The poor man couldn’t even spend the day with her without her acting like a love-starved kid. Maybe she was love-starved. Maybe that’s why she didn’t have a problem walking away from her home in Philly and spending the summer and fall here, in limbo as she waited for her life to patch itself up. Living with Ellie and Fink and sharing the closeness of a family. Working with them to make the farm profitable. Having fun while they did it. She had to admit, she loved being part of a family and a business. It was icing that she was able to use her love of decorating to directly help.
But as much as she loved it, Fink and Ellie deserved to have their home and family back to themselves. She didn’t want to overstay and make them wish she was gone. It was time to move on. Hopefully, she’d get the gig in D.C. Even if she didn’t, she had the teaching position that she’d been offered. She just had to let them know that she was taking it.
She handed another candle holder decoration to Gator. His fingers brushed hers. Deliberately. Her breath caught and her eyes flew to his. A sparkle of humor lurked there, but also something deeper, something she wasn’t quite sure about. Her hand went to her chest before she purposely turned away and pulled another holder from the box.
She couldn’t believe he had made all these decorations. She held one up. “You enjoy carpentry work.”
“Yeah. Bigger things even more. Cabinets. Kitchens. Sheds. Chairs. I made a couple of chicken coops for people out west. Stuff like that.”
“So why don’t you do that?”
“Because I’m a big boy who knows that I’m lucky to have a job I enjoy. Not everyone gets to make a living doing what they love. Plus, I know a guy who used to love fly fishing. He started a tour guide company where he leads people on fishing expeditions. Basically, he fishes all day and gets paid for it. You know, it’s just a job now.”
“You think if you became a carpenter, it’d stop being something you love and become just a job?”
“Yeah.”
“I disagree,” she said as she handed him another holder.
“You know me better than I know myself?”
“No. I think it has everything to do with your attitude.”
“So, I have a bad attitude.” He stretched above his head and used both hands to secure the holder.
She snorted. “I didn’t say that.”
“Okay?”
“I love playing the tuba. And I got to do it for a living when I played in the symphony and taught at college. I still love playing the tuba.” After pushing in the candle, she waited for him to take the next holder from her.
“You’re not making a living from it anymore.”
A pang hit her heart. “No. But I’m trying. And I still love it. I just think anything becomes a job if you let it.”
He seemed to consider her words. “So, attitude is everything. Anyone can learn to love anything?”
“Not exactly. I think you’re a better fit for some jobs than others. But, for example, I think I could be happy as an interior decorator, except I don’t want to go back to school and get the degrees I’d need.” She laughed. “I’d still play my tuba, though. For fun. Maybe give lessons. I can’t imagine life without it.”
“It’d be quieter,” he said with a flash of his dimple.
She lifted her brows at him. “Funny guy.”
“Yeah. I can’t imagine a job where I was chained to a desk.”
“I can’t imagine you in a job like that, either.”
He lifted another holder from her and met her gaze. “Really? That obvious, huh?”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s kind of hard for me to picture you making the intricate cuts that those decorations require, though, too.”
After taking a quick glance at the other competitors to make sure that they weren’t falling behind, Avery grabbed another candle and holder.
Gator carefully attached the holder to the tree. “Making these things does take patience. And exacting measure. I enjoy doing it. I made these in the evenings after school. Then, to relax and get out of that headspace, I’d take my dogs coon hunting.”
“And go to school the next day?”
“I was always in by three or four in the morning.” He grimaced. “Almost always.”
“And you were coon hunting?” She stopped and put a hand on her hip. “Really?”
He looked at her with a baffled expression. “Yeah. What’d you think? I was really street racing my truck on the highway?”
“Um, no? I figured you were out with a girl.”
“Nah. I wasn’t really interested in girls.”
“That’s weird,” Avery said before she could stop herself.
He shrugged, but kept working. “Yeah. It was, actually. I mean, I liked them okay. I just didn’t understand them and preferred to be with my dogs.”
“Wow. That’s bad.”
“They’re nice dogs.”
“Until Kristen
came along.”
“I thought, since she loved the things I did, that we’d get along just fine. Actually, we do get along just fine.”
“I saw that.” Avery tried to keep any rancor out of her voice. It was obvious he and Kristen got along. “So, is it prying to ask what happened?”
“She wanted more than I had.” He stated it simply and lifted a shoulder, like it didn’t matter.
She wasn’t fooled by his casual manner. The pinched look around his eyes and the slight tightening of his mouth gave him away.
“More time? More stuff?” she asked.
After he’d finished the top tier of the tree that she couldn’t reach, she took over attaching the wooden boxes while he began to light the candles.
“More money. We both loved the outdoors and being active. Hunting and shooting. It’s a great pastime and hobby for both of us. But she wanted to turn it into something bigger. That was gonna take more money than I’d ever have.”
“Didn’t she know that when she married you?”
He clicked the lighter on and touched it to the candle. “I think she thought I’d sell my mother’s house. Not a chance.”
“What’s this bigger thing?”
“She wanted to purchase a hunting preserve.”
“Did she?”
“Yep, she did.”
“How’d she get the money?”
He shut the light off with a snap. “Married it.”
Avery laughed. “What’s she doing here if she has the big hunting preserve she always wanted?”
One side of Gator’s mouth kicked up in an ironic half-smile. “She wants me to manage it for her.”
Avery’s stomach dropped. She knew he was leaving, but somehow him leaving to work for Kristen was much worse than him going back to his old job. She studied the decoration in her hand. “Isn’t that a little twisted?”
“What?”
“Her getting her ex to manage the preserve she bought with her current husband’s money?”
He shook his head and lit another candle. “Maybe. I guess. I don’t know.”
“You’re interested?” Avery asked softly, glad her voice didn’t tremble. Her whole body had turned to ice at the thought, and she recognized the feeling for what it was: jealousy, made worse by the fact that she didn’t want him to leave at all.
Maybe he didn’t hear her because he never answered.
It was close to five, and winter twilight had stolen over the celebration grounds. As he lit the candles, the tree started to glow, almost becoming life-like as the flames bounced and flickered. Thankfully there was no wind.
Gator had caught up to her, and as she knelt on the ground, fastening the last candle holder to the tree, he knelt beside her, waiting with the lighter.
She leaned back as he secured the white candle in the holder before he touched the lighter to the wick and the last flame flickered to life.
He leaned back beside her, almost as though he knew exactly where she was without looking. Or maybe she was just pushing her own awareness onto him. Whatever it was, she didn’t move and allowed their sleeves to brush as he settled back and they stared at the tree.
The other groups were winding down as well, although a few frantically rushed to finish before the bell. The crowd was silent, as though awed by the magic of the beauty of lights and decorations before them. Soft Christmas music still played from speakers somewhere and drifted on the evening air. Random flakes of snow meandered down, catching and reflecting the lights of the pretty trees.
Avery leaned her head back and watched the flakes coming down, envying them their complete unconcern about where they landed or even which other flakes fell with them. Wouldn’t that be nice, to go through life unconcerned with where you lived or who lived with you? She wouldn’t harbor any resentment for a dad who preferred a woman other than her mom and a fiancé who felt the same way about her.
She wouldn’t be wishing this time with Gator would never end.
She turned her head, meaning to study him, but found him watching her. Normally, she might think a man who looked at her like that might be interested, but she hadn’t fixed her hair or makeup all day, and she’d just spent the last half-hour bossing him around. Plus, she’d seen his ex. Avery wasn’t going to lie to herself. A man who was interested in a woman like Kristen would never be interested in her.
“I think you should be smiling. Your tree looks pretty darn good.” Gator spoke low, almost intimately, and the low rumble of his voice made her shiver.
She blinked as a snowflake hit her eyelash and turned her head back to the sky.
Gator shifted, but she didn’t look at him. “What’s the matter, Avery? You’ve been pretty chatty this whole time. Now all the sudden nothing but Christmas music. It’s like you’re somewhere else.”
She could hardly believe that he hadn’t noticed that she was hyper-aware of him and totally attracted. That was the problem. Wouldn’t he just flip if he knew?
What if she told him?
Avery’s eyes opened wide, even as her brain automatically screamed no way. He would laugh, and she’d be embarrassed. Plus, talk about opening oneself up to hurt and ridicule.
But she was leaving, and Gator was going back out west, so it wasn’t like it was going to make the rest of her life awkward or anything. And, for once, she could be honest. If she read his earlier look correctly and he felt an attraction toward her, they could have a little fling together. She’d never done anything like that, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t try it. Once.
She allowed the words to come out of her mouth before reason took back over. “I enjoyed working with you.”
His look was skeptical, which prompted more, even worse, uncensored words to erupt from her mouth. “But you’re right. I do want to be somewhere else. After all, I can’t hardly take your shirt off here.”
Gator looked at her, his mouth slightly ajar.
Her courage and sass evaporated like a drop of water on a hot skillet, and she scrambled to get up.
He grabbed her arm. “No. No, you don’t get to say something like that, then run away.”
Her arm heated where he touched it, and his eyes smoldered into hers. She hadn’t anticipated that she might need to explain her comment. Or defend it.
The sharp ringing of a bell pierced the air.
Gator’s lips tightened, but his eyes never left hers.
“The time is up.” After the quiet of the past minutes, the voice from the loudspeaker seemed unnaturally loud. “Please take any unused decorations and surplus boxes and bags and exit the decorating area. Stay outside the yellow tape. The judges will be around. A winner will be announced at the bonfire area in forty-five minutes.”
Avery tore her eyes away and struggled to stand. Gator’s hand loosened on her arm, moving to cup her elbow and help her up. She turned away, feeling like a coward, and he let her go. Part of her wanted badly to flirt a little, see where things might lead. But she’d spent her life building walls to protect herself from any pain associated with getting close to a man. Even with her fiancé, their relationship had been built on shared interests rather than shared attraction.
Mrs. Franks was slouched in her chair, bundled in her blankets, sleeping. Avery didn’t even have that as a distraction.
The idea of letting go a little and having a fun little relationship with Gator was appealing, but she knew where that road led. She’d managed to avoid it all her life. Just because a man had come along to whom she was attracted and who also happened to be nice and fun to work with, didn’t mean that the rules, or the outcome, had changed.
Determined, she turned to Gator. “I’m sorry. That was a stupid, juvenile thing to say. I needed to concentrate on getting the decorations just right. That’s why I seemed so far away.” She brushed her hands down her legs and nodded at the tree. “I think we did a great job.”
The energy that had shown from his eyes had dimmed. “I never thought I’d have fun trimming a tree.”
/> Relief that he wasn’t going to press her about her asinine comment flowed through her. She indicated his mother. “Should we wake her?”
Chapter Eleven
Gator tried to meet Avery’s gaze, but she wouldn’t look at him. The comment about his shirt had probably just slipped out, and had obviously embarrassed her. She didn’t need to know how it completely shifted his world. He’d had such a good time with Avery, but it was this attraction that he couldn’t shake that had him bothered. His heart and body had jumped on the idea that she might feel it too.
From the way she was looking at anything besides him, apparently not.
Gator’s dogs were stretched out under his mother’s chair. “I think I have time before they announce the winners to take her home and get her settled there.”
“I’ll help you,” Avery turned and started toward his mother’s chair.
“You haven’t seen the whole celebration—I know you haven’t had time to walk around today. Go, see some things.”
“I’ll help you with your mom, first,” Avery insisted. “Unless you want to do it all yourself?”
It would be easier with help. He could feed the dogs while she took care of getting his mom in the house and ready for home nursing to come. “People come from all over to see this festival. It’s a big deal.”
She shook his mother awake gently. “I think I saw the most important things,” she said. Then her attention focused on helping his mom sit up.
“If you come with me, I’ll walk you around when we get back.” He could tell himself he offered because he felt he owed her for helping, but he knew that wasn’t it.
“Deal.”
While Avery took care of his mom, Gator loaded the dogs and brought his pickup as close to the tree area as possible. It helped that the security guard knew him and let him pull through one closed street, so his mom only had to walk a half of a block.
Gator carried the chair in one hand. His other hand went around his mother’s back, overlapping Avery’s slender arm.
Just Right Page 12
