“We’ll leave you be, but I couldn’t leave without telling someone what really happened. I’m glad I found the person I needed to tell most of all.” Dusk nodded to Lex, the pair of them heading for the door. Lex pulled it open and stepped through while Dusk hovered in the doorway for a moment. “If you change your mind, Cyrilo, you can find us at the temple graveyard near the docks. I’ll watch for you until we leave in two days.” Dusk took a step forward, but then turned back. “Cyrilo?” he asked. “Where was he buried? I… I’d like to talk to him again.”
Cyrilo was silent for a moment. “He wasn’t. A few of us took him out of the city and put him on a pyre. Apparently that’s the tradition around here. It was the best we could do for him.”
“Oh. I see.” Dusk stood there for a brief moment, thinking it over. He shook his head. There wouldn’t be a place to talk to Eiran like he’d hoped. “Two days until we leave. I hope to see you.”
Cyrilo responded with a slight nod, never pulling his gaze away from the fire. Without another word Dusk pulled the door closed behind him, hearing the metal latch fall into place. Lex led the way out of the brothel and back into the streets. Dusk pulled his cloak tight around him as the cold air stung his skin. The snow was still falling, but it no longer held much appeal for him. After seeing how devastated Cyrilo had been, the beauty seemed to have leached from the world.
They walked on in silence for a while, only the sounds of the city and the crunching snow around them. Dusk followed Lex’s lead, not knowing which way to go. After a long while Dusk noticed the lamp light was dying away. He looked up and was surprised to see Lex was leading him towards the edge of the lake. The snow had stopped falling and the clouds had dispersed a bit to allow Gartha to peek through, its warm ruddy light shining down. The sky beyond the clouds was littered with stars. As they came closer Dusk could smell the familiar mineral tang from the hot springs in the air and hear the soft waves crashing on the shore. In the dark the lake seemed stark black, but the starlight that twinkled on the surface of the water was dyed green by the lake’s hue.
Lex led him all the way to the beach where a thin sheet of ice gathered around the extreme edges of the shore. A light fog rolled off the water’s surface, being too warm to actually freeze much beyond the beach. Far in the distance Dusk could just make out the dark silhouette of the island where the rest of Edoroth’s remains laid in an underwater cavern at the bottom of the lake. Somewhere down there was a shining stone that he’d enchanted. He wondered if it was still there, shafts of light peeking out every time the sand shifted. Would someone find it again in a thousand years and wonder where it came from?
“What you did tonight was really brave,” Lex said, coming to a stop.
Dusk stepped up beside him. “No it wasn’t. I had to do it.”
“No, you really didn’t. And most people wouldn’t have.” Lex tilted his head up and gazed at the stars. “You’re really special, you know that?”
Dusk scoffed.
“Really, I meant it. You escaped your captivity, you saved me multiple times, you have thwarted the Circle twice now, and you go out of your way to do the right thing, even if it hurts.”
“The only reason I’m even alive is because of you and Tara.”
“The same can be said of us because of you. In a way, we’ve all saved each other.” Lex smiled wide. “I’m not entirely sure how healthy that is, but I’d rather be standing here with you than still tied up on the road. Even after all the pain of this journey.”
“That makes me feel great.”
“I’m not saying it to make you feel guilty. I’m saying it because I mean it.” Lex paused, turning his gaze towards Dusk. “I know I haven’t told you everything about my past, but you know enough to understand that this has been harder for me than I expected.”
“I know.” Dusk turned his head down. “It’s been the same for me. I’m sorry I ever held that against you.”
“Hey,” Lex whispered, “it’s okay. To be honest, I think I needed it. I’ve spent my whole life thinking this world is like my books about history, heroes, and adventures. But those books leave a lot of things out. They don’t talk about the toll it takes on you to be hunted or to always be on the run. I’m just as much a fugitive as you are. The Circle is hunting me too.”
“Your family must really want you back to hire them.” Dusk lifted his head, trying to make out Lex’s expression in the dark. “They… they must really miss you.”
“No. They don’t,” Lex replied flatly, turning away for a moment. “I doubt my absence has made my father change at all. If he missed me, he’d come for me himself or send someone who wasn’t trying to kill us at every turn.” He heaved a great sigh. “No, I suspect he’s merely trying to bring me home so he can kill me himself. He could always just have another son. Who knows, maybe he’s got another on the way already.”
“Why would he do that?”
“There are so many things I want to tell you Dusk, but... I can’t.” He took a deep breath. “Not yet.”
“I understand. I know what that’s like.”
“I know you do.” He turned towards Dusk and took a step forward, closing the distance between them so that they were only a few inches apart. “However, there is something I need to tell you. After everything that’s happened I think it’s time I said it. I can’t wait any longer.”
Lex standing so close was making Dusk’s heart pound, although he didn’t understand why. He could smell the ale and smoke from the tavern rolling off him. “Tell me what?”
“I don’t want something to happen and never get the chance to tell you that…” Lex paused for a moment, the look of fear evident on his face. “That I like you a lot Dusk. You’re more than just a friend and companion to me.”
Dusk’s breath caught in his chest. He could feel his cheeks burning in the cold and his mind was racing. A million emotions and thoughts flashed through his head, but for some reason he was unable to speak. His jaw felt as if it had been wired shut.
“I was so jealous when I saw you with Eiran the night we got here. When you were gone the next morning it dawned on me that the person I was mad at wasn’t you, but myself. I’d felt this way for a while and I never had the courage to say anything. I was so scared that I’d never see you again or be able to tell you.” He paused, staring into Dusk’s eyes. “But after everything Cyrilo told us tonight, I knew I couldn’t go another night without letting you know because we don’t know what could happen in this next moment.”
“Lex… I—”
“You don’t have to say anything or even accept it. I just couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t tell you. You have so much going on and this is just one more thing to make you worry about. So please, forget I said anything. I’m content just to be near you.”
Lex turned away. Dusk stood there for a moment, staring at the back of his head. His blond hair had grown long and a bit shaggy. He couldn’t believe what Lex was telling him, but he knew it wasn't a joke. For a long time Dusk had wondered why he was so comfortable with Lex. He’d never had a similar experience with anyone else. Nobody else had given him the strange fluttering sensation that seemed to fill his entire body. During the night he’d spent with Eiran he’d felt it for a moment, but he’d written it off as nervousness. However, this was something new and it seemed to envelope his entire body.
Without realizing it he’d reached up and grabbed Lex by the shoulder, turning him back around. He stepped forward, closing the gap between them so that their bodies met. Reaching up with his gloved hand he pushed a few strands of hair out of Lex’s face, staring into those blue eyes that reflected the starlight. Dusk leaned forward an inch and waited for Lex’s reaction. There was a flash of realization before Lex closed the distance and placed his lips over Dusk’s.
The world seemed to melt away and Dusk felt a warmth spread through his body starting at his head and running all the way to his toes. It was different from his night with Eiran. Something else was
going on that he didn’t understand, but it felt better than anything he’d ever done in his life. His skin prickled from the contact and he threw his arms around Lex’s shoulders. He didn’t know how long they stayed there, but when they finally pulled apart, he felt as if he was vibrating from head to toe.
“I didn’t expect that,” Lex whispered breathlessly.
“I… I’m sorry.”
“By the gods! Don’t be sorry for that!” Lex chuckled. “And if you want to do it again, don’t be sorry about that either.”
Dusk pulled him back in for a shorter kiss, the electricity jumping through his skin as they touched. Pulling away from Lex once more he wrapped an arm around his waist and leaned close, looking back out over the lake. “So… what happens next? I don’t know how this works.”
“Neither do I,” Lex replied, throwing his cloak around Dusk’s shoulders. “I guess we just do what feels right.”
They stood there for a long moment, looking out over the water and watching the stars shimmer on the surface. Dusk heard a familiar sound and turned his head to the south. On the horizon he could make out the Tulamars spraying mist up into the air as they breached the surface, their shrill cries echoing across the water. He pointed them out to Lex who stared at them with rapt attention. One of them suddenly burst through the surface and crashed back down with a massive splash.
“Wow…” Lex murmured.
“You should see them up close,” Dusk chuckled. “It’s a lot more intense… and wet.”
They both watched as the pod of Tulamars eventually made their way out of sight, back below the surface of the lake.
“We should probably head back,” Dusk finally sighed, turning back to Lex. “Tara is going to kill us.”
“Sounds like a good reason not to go back.”
“We have to, for Maribel’s sake.”
“You really love that horse, don’t you?”
“Well,” Dusk said, planting a quick kiss on Lex’s cheek. He took a few steps before turning back over his shoulder, “She can’t talk, so she’s a pretty ideal travelling companion.”
“I’m not sure if that’s directed at me or Tara, but I’m offended.”
Eight
For Dusk to say Tara was upset at their surprise outing would have been an understatement. The moment they found themselves back near the temple they saw her standing in the center of the street, her arms crossed and tapping her foot. As they approached Dusk heard a low growl emanating from her body.
“Get. Inside. Now.” she hissed through her teeth, pointing back towards the doorway.
“Tara, don’t be ups—” Lex began.
“NOW!”
Dusk kept his head down and made his way up the stone stairs into the temple. He lifted his gaze only for a moment to glance at the statues. He followed the other two through the passageways and into the old storage room without being seen. Tara single handedly pulled the tile away from the floor and pointed downward towards the stairs, her finger shaking. Dusk went first and Lex followed close behind. In the dark she dropped down beside them and slammed the tile back into place.
“Walk,” she commanded.
It was a tense few minutes as they wound down the stairs and back into the main sanctum. Once inside Tara grabbed them both by the scruff and led them across the room. They saw Diana begin to make her way over, but Tara shook her head.
“I’ve got it,” she said menacingly.
Diana stopped in her tracks, her eyebrows lifting high, whether in terror or understanding, Dusk wasn’t sure. She gave a small nod and Tara dragged the pair of them forward towards their shared chambers. She wrenched the door open and threw them inside before slamming it behind her. Crossing her arms once more she stood with her back to the door, glaring with all the venom she could muster. Dusk rubbed the back of his neck where Tara had held him. She had a vice-like grip that even he found surprising.
“Do you two fucking morons know how worried I’ve been? You’ve been gone for hours!” Tara yelled. She threw her arm towards Lex, “You should have known better! You know just as well as I do how dangerous this place is for Dusk! How could you put him in danger like that? What the fuck is wrong with you? Do you have any brains in that skull of yours you dumb twinky bimbo?”
“Call me whatever you want Tara, but I don’t regret any of it,” Lex spat back. “He’s been locked up down here for days and before that he was imprisoned. Maybe we should just chain him up like the Circle did, huh? Is that what you want?”
“If they had found you, that’s exactly what would have happened!” Tara stepped forward and grabbed him by the collar, twisting it in her fist as she pulled him toward her. “You just put him in so much danger! Both of you could have been kidnapped, killed, or worse!”
“Let me go!” Lex yelled back in her face. “I won’t keep him locked up anymore! He deserves to be free, just like the rest of us!”
Dusk stepped up, putting a hand on both of them and pushing them apart. “Stop it, the both of you!” he cried, giving them a shove. The pair of them stepped back, looking surprised by his show of aggression. “I wanted to leave, Lex didn’t convince me of anything. And you,” he said turning to Lex. “I don’t need you to fight my battles and I don’t need you to protect me.”
“That’s not what I’ve seen,” Tara scoffed, crossing her arms once more. “For as often as you’ve helped us, we’ve had to save your ass too.”
Dusk felt himself deflating quickly. “Why don’t we stop all this, huh?” he sighed. “I don’t have the energy to put up a fight tonight. I wanted to go out, so I did. At first it was just for fun to get some fresh air, but then we found ourselves back at the brothel and there were some personal things I needed to take care of.”
“You two made a pit stop to get your dicks sucked? Are you kidding me?”
“Will you drop the ex-soldier bullshit?” Lex asked, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You don’t need to act so tough around us all the time. We both know it’s a facade.”
“We’ll see how fake it is when I knock your fucking teeth out—”
“ENOUGH!” Dusk screamed at the pair of them. They both stared, Lex’s mouth hung open slightly, as Dusk took a deep breath to steady himself. “Tara, I stopped at the brothel to apologize to them for Eiran’s death and to try to make amends if I could. I wanted to find out where he was buried so I could say goodbye and apologize to him.”
The anger melted from Tara’s face and her arms fell to her sides. Dusk saw Lex turn his gaze to the fireplace, not making eye contact with either of them. Silence hovered between them like the tension that builds before a thunderstorm. Dusk was hoping one of them would speak because he didn’t know what else to say. He felt stupid for even mentioning it, but somehow he felt that if he just got a moment to talk to Eiran, he could tell him he was sorry.
“Well?” Tara asked in a much softer tone. “What did you find out?”
“They… they burned him. Outside of town,” Dusk replied, unable to look her in the eye.
“Do you know where?”
“No.”
Tara took a deep breath. “Well I guess we’d better find out so we can go there.”
Dusk lifted his head and stared into her eyes. There was something there, an immense sadness he’d never seen before.
“Everyone should have the chance to say goodbye.” She paused for a moment. “I wish I did.”
With that Tara turned and stepped out of the room, pulling the door closed behind her. Dusk stood there for a minute or two, wondering what had come over her. It was obvious she had lost someone dear to her, but he didn’t know who it could be. He thought of her family or maybe her uncle, but that didn’t seem likely. Tara had never struck him as the family type. Then he thought of Princess Nedarya, but that didn’t seem likely either. Diana had said she was engaged to a noble in Malkekna when Tara was protecting her. Maybe there had been someone else along the way that nobody knew about. He felt he should ask her about it eventual
ly, but it didn’t seem like the right moment.
“Dusk?” Lex said softly from beside him. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” he replied, rubbing his hands across his face. “I’m sorry I snapped at you. I appreciate you trying to defend me, but I think I need to learn to speak for myself.”
“I didn’t mean to upset you, but I understand.”
“Thank you.” Dusk turned towards him and wrapped his arms around Lex’s waist, pulling him in. “Something happened to Tara, something she’s not telling us.”
“You mean something she’s not telling you,” Lex corrected. “You forget, we spent a lot of time together while you were with Yar–preoccupied with other things.”
“You can say it. I know the truth. You two spent most of the journey here alone and then again when I pushed you both away.” Dusk leaned his head against Lex’s shoulder. “What happened to her?”
“I don’t think it’s my place to say,” Lex sighed. “As much as I want to. I think that’s something you’ll need to ask her yourself.”
“Lex?”
“Yeah?”
“Will you sleep with me again?”
“Of course.”
◆◆◆
The next morning Dusk snuck out of bed, leaving Lex snoring softly under the wool blankets. He saw Tara’s bed was empty and made his way quietly to the main chamber looking for her. He found her at a table with Diana, the pair of them chatting over breakfast. Dusk took a deep breath and made his way over.
“Tara?” he asked quietly. “I wanted to talk to you. It’s about something you said last night.”
“I had a feeling this was coming,” she sighed, the smile fading from her face. Diana looked to them both with her brows furrowed with concern. “I gave away too much.”
“Should I go?” Diana asked, pointing her thumb over her shoulder.
“No, you’re fine. You know some of the story already. Dusk, take a seat.”
Dusk pulled out the chair and sat between the pair of them at the side of the table. He folded his hands in his lap and lifted his gaze to Tara.
The Crystal Key: An LGBTQ+ Fantasy Series (The Crystalline Chronicles Book 3) Page 6
