by A M Snead
The guy shrugged. “Whatever. Just thought you should know you got a little money-maker on your hands if you decide you need extra cash.” His mom pointed toward the front door and the man shrugged again and left the apartment.
The boy stared at his mom, tears welling up. He wasn’t nearly as upset by the man’s “suggestion” as he was by Bud’s absence. “Where…where’s Bud?”
With the other man gone, his mom’s demeanor changed, a strained look on her face. She avoided the boy’s eyes and withdrew the money and absently flipped through the bills. “He’s gone.”
“But…” The boy’s tears thickened. Gone? “But why? We were gonna go to the game tomorrow, and he…” The boy looked at the food on the stove and the counter. “He bought dinner. Why would he just leave?”
His mother messed with the cash in silence, tucking her right leg under her as she sat in one of the kitchen chairs.
“Mom?” the boy choked.
“Watch the food,” his mom whispered. “It’s gonna burn.”
“I don’t care.” A sob caught in the boy’s throat. “Why did Bud leave?”
“I told him to, all right?” she snapped, face tight, a watery sheen to her eyes.
The boy frowned, trembling. “Wh-what? Why would you…?”
She shook her head and stared at the table, fingering the money. “If you learn anything from me, baby,” she whispered so low he had to strain to hear. “Learn this.” She raised her eyes and looked at him, tears shimmering. “Leave them before they can leave you. And they will…every time. We liked him too much, baby. We were setting ourselves up to be hurt.”
The boy frowned with frustration. “I don’t…I don’t know what you mean?” A tear broke free and rolled down his cheek.
“Love will always break your heart,” she whispered and looked away. “Don’t get caught, baby. Guard your heart at all cost. When you feel yourself falling…” She looked up slowly, hurt mixing with her tears. “…run for your life.”
♦ ♦ ♦
“What the fuck?” Lucas snorted and chalked the tip of the pool stick. “You trying to steal my man Jack before I even get a turn?”
Innocence saturated Derek’s reply. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, baby.” He snickered and watched Lucas line up his next shot.
“What the fuck ever,” Lucas scoffed. “I heard you out there soliciting his services for your little three-way.”
Derek chuckled. “Must be hearing things, baby.” A low—“mmm”—pushed out of him when Lucas leaned over the table, and Lucas could feel the weight of Derek’s sultry eyes devouring his ass.
“Step back,” Lucas muttered, glancing to the side. He couldn’t actually see the man, but he knew what he was capable of. “You’re invading my space.”
“You have plenty of room,” Derek insisted. “Quit stalling just because you can’t make the shot.”
“I never miss.” Lucas smirked. That wasn’t true, but he did make more shots than Derek. He shifted and steadied the pool stick, zeroing in the perfect spot to tap the cue ball to drive his ball into the designated pocket. The ball was flush against the rail. One small, hard jab on the lower part of the cue ball should send the ball in question rolling straight down the rail and into the pocket—and in turn stop the cue ball dead, preventing it from following and scratching the shot.
Lucas drew back the stick slowly and as he shot—two hands grabbed his ass and squeezed. The tip of the stick hit the cue ball awkwardly, sending his ball spinning haphazardly across the table. He cursed loudly and caught Derek in the chest with the heel of his hand as he spun around.
“You fucking cheater!”
“What?” Derek coughed, rubbed his chest, and grinned, shrugging helplessly. “Fuck, man, you thrust that ass in the air like that—I can’t help myself.”
“Hey, now,” Bailey warned, laughing and shooting a stiff look at Derek. “I just got home. That ass is all mine for at least a week.”
“Mm-hmm.” Derek smiled at him. “Does that mean your ass is off-limits as well? Because, well…” He groaned audibly and raked his eyes down the guy’s body.
Lucas’ eyes narrowed. “That’s exactly what it means, you fucking thief,” he growled, a dark grin twisting his lips.
“What? I can’t even borrow him on Monday while you and Jack are…” He cleared his throat and grinned.
“Fuck no,” Lucas scoffed. “And you can even ask? After just fucking up my shot? Man, you got some brass ones.”
“Yeah.” Derek adjusted his crotch. “I do, baby.” He walked over to Bailey and slung his arm around his shoulders. He jabbed a thumb at Lucas. “Who the hell gave that guy dibs on you anyway? ’Cause you and I…” He ducked his head and nibbled Bailey’s ear. “We could make some sweet, sweet music together.”
“Get your ass back over here and take your shot.” Lucas walked toward them. “And get the fuck off my man.”
“I thought Jack was your man.” Derek smirked, dropping his arm. “Isn’t that what you just called him?”
“I have a variety of them. But this one…” Lucas curled his arm around Bailey’s neck. “He’s an extra-special treat because I only get to savor him on occasion.”
Bailey sighed. “I kind of feel like a popsicle.”
“Yeah?” Derek grinned. “I’ll give you a few good licks.”
Lucas rolled his eyes and laughed. The man was relentless. “You ain’t fucking licking nothing on this one.”
Derek opened his mouth to shoot back a snarky reply when Jack entered the room. “Jack! The man of the hour. Good, you’re here.” He grinned and approached Jack, throwing his arm around him. “Mind if I fondle you? Lucas is hogging Bailey and won’t let me touch or lick him.”
A short laugh escaped Jack, but the humor failed to reach his eyes.
♥
Jack had headed for his room after leaving Gideon’s office, needing time to emotionally regroup and get a grip before facing anyone. Garrett’s kiss had unhinged him, though he struggled to deny it, refused to admit he had anything more than a sexual reaction to it. Any one of these guys could kiss him that way and get him hard. Garrett wasn’t special.
The instant he entered his room, though, he realized it was the worst place for him at that moment. Could he lie on the bed that he and Garrett had had sex on the night before? Right now—after Garrett had just kissed him so hot and heavy? He’d backed out of the room and gone downstairs, putting on his game face as he went. Or trying to anyway. As soon as he stepped into the rec room and was caught in Lucas’ stare, he knew he wasn’t fooling the guy.
Derek’s arm crushed Jack against the man’s body and it occurred to Jack that the best way to get over one man—was get under another. So to speak. He slid his arm around Derek’s waist and smiled. “Only if I get to fondle back.”
“Oh, hell yeah,” Derek laughed.
“Shit.” Lucas shook his head. “After Monday, baby, I will have spoiled you on all other men. You will crave only me.”
Jack almost wished it were true. Lucas was a great guy, but Jack felt no compulsion to pour his heart into the man—thus they could be “just” fuck friends without fear of it trying to become more. “Well aren’t you the confident one?” Jack smirked.
“Sounded like arrogance to me,” Derek offered with a snort.
“Can’t a man be sure of himself?” Lucas posed. “Is that a bad thing?”
“Egotistical,” Derek continued.
Lucas scowled.
“Pretentious.”
“Fuck you,” Lucas chortled.
“Conceited.”
“I’m gonna fucking punch you.”
“Vain.” Derek grinned. “Contemptuous.” Lucas darted forward and swung a fist noncommittedly at Derek. Laughing, Derek dodged him. “Braggart.”
Bailey busted up. “I’d shut up, man.”
Scooting out of the line of fire, Jack worked his way over to Bailey. “Fuck,” he chuckled. “Those two are six of one, half
a dozen of the other.”
Bailey laughed harder and nodded. “No shit.”
“Was that a shot?” Lucas turned and eyed Jack narrowly, aborting his attempted assault on Derek. A dark grin cut across his face. “You taking shots now?”
“No.” Jack shook his head, laughing. “I swear, I’m not.”
“Sounded like a shot to me,” Derek piped up.
Lucas grinned at Derek. “Get him.”
“No!” Jack yipped and dove behind Bailey, clutching the back of his shirt and using him as a shield.
“Hey!” Bailey was suddenly sandwiched between Jack and the two men trying to get at him.
The four of them scuffled, laughing. Jack clung to Bailey, refusing to be pulled out into the open.
“Well, aren’t we all cozy?”
The playful brawl halted abruptly at Garrett’s remark. The four young men detached from one another and stepped apart. “Garrett.” Lucas cleared his throat and ran his fingers through his hair. “Hey, there’s always room for one more.” He grinned. “That is our motto.”
Garrett looked at him dryly before his eyes cut to Jack. “Hey, buddy. How about we play one?” He motioned to the pool table. “Since we’re all friendly.”
Swallowing thickly, Jack’s heart raced. Garrett’s stare was hardly a friendly invite. Though the guy kept his cool, Jack had the sense he was pissed. And pissed at Jack, no less. What gives you the right to be pissed at me?
“What do you say, Jack?” Garrett practically snarled. “A nice friendly game.” His eyes dulled. “No cheating. Think you can manage that?”
Jack stared at him, anger simmering. What the fuck was he implying? “Can you?” Jack returned cuttingly.
Lucas, Derek, and Bailey exchanged uncertain glances. “Are we missing something?” Lucas asked.
“Not a thing,” Garrett drawled. “Just attempting to engage our man Jack in a friendly game of pool.” His eyes held Jack’s stare and a sudden, fleeting look passed through them. A look that didn’t coincide with the man’s current attitude. It was gone before Jack could analyze it or even be sure if he really saw it. But whatever it was—it nailed Jack in the heart, and suddenly the aftereffect of Garrett’s kiss hit him full force. He felt the stinging behind his eyes and looked away quickly and moved toward the door.
“Sorry,” he mumbled stiffly. “I’m not in the mood.”
Garrett’s arm caught him around the neck abruptly, halting him in his tracks. The man’s lips shoved close to his ear. “If you think that kiss meant shit,” he hissed. “Think again.”
The words stabbed into his head and Jack jerked away harshly, walking quickly from the rec room.
♥
“Jack…” Lucas started forward, but Derek touched his arm.
“I’ll go talk to him, you…” He nodded at Garrett who was racking up the pool balls. Lucas wasn’t sure if he was the right one to stay behind and talk to the guy. They had almost come to blows once today—over Jack. But Derek was already headed out.
“I’m going to”—Bailey motioned toward the door and backed in that direction—“go with Derek.”
Thanks a lot, Lucas thought sourly, you go running after the fluffy bunny and leave me here with the porcupine.
Sighing heavily, Lucas approached the table with caution. Garrett’s face was hard as he arranged the balls properly within the triangle rack. “Obviously Gideon’s talk didn’t do any good, huh?”
“It did wonders.” Sarcasm dripped from Garrett’s words. “Can’t you tell? A handshake and a kiss, that’s all it takes.” He raised his eyes to Lucas. “And we’re best friends again.”
“What’re you talking about?” Lucas murmured, frowning.
Garrett stared at him then shook his head, looking away. “Nothing,” he muttered and lifted the rack away from the balls.
“Garrett, what the hell is going on, man?” Lucas asked cautiously. “You’re the pleasant, happy-go-lucky guy of the house…this isn’t you. What the fuck happened?”
His eyes growing distant, Garrett gripped the edge of the table. “I stopped listening to my mom.”
“What?” Lucas’ frown deepened; Garrett had never mentioned any family before. The only person he’d referenced from his past was the guy who had given him the pocketknife for his thirteenth birthday, but even then, he hadn’t named names.
“She gave me a rule to live by. One simple rule to keep life from getting complicated.” Garrett focused and looked at Lucas, a gloss to his eyes. “And I broke that rule.”
“I don’t understand. What rule?”
Garrett shook his head and shoved away from the table. “It doesn’t matter,” he whispered tightly, face hardening. “I won’t ever break it again.”
“Garrett…”
The man waved him off and walked out.
Lucas stared at the empty doorway. If he wasn’t so fond of his hair—he’d be ripping it out about now.
36 “The Boys Of Denial”
“Jack, wait up.” Derek was behind him before Jack made it to the top of the stairs. He didn’t respond until he was on the second floor and the guy was too close to evade.
Jack stopped and turned around slowly, unable to blink away the wetness quickly enough. Next to Derek stood Bailey. “What?”
“Are you okay?” Derek asked with real concern. “Look, I don’t know what Garrett’s problem is today, but don’t let him get to you. Come back to the rec room.”
Jack glanced between the two men. Bailey nodded. “Yeah, Jack. Come on. We were having a good time. Don’t let one sourpuss ruin it.”
You’re ruining everything. Just leave!
“Maybe Scotty was right,” he whispered.
Derek and Bailey exchanged glances. “What?” Derek frowned.
“He said I was ruining everything and that I should leave.” He looked at the two men. “Maybe he was right. Everything was fine when I got here, and now…” He shrugged and swallowed tightly. “…it’s all fucked up. Maybe I should just leave, like Scotty suggested.”
Bailey stepped forward. “Jack…Scotty’s a good guy, but he’s got some serious issues. You can’t take to heart the things he says.”
Couldn’t he? Scotty had warned him about Garrett, and he’d been right on point with that. “Just because he has issues,” Jack said quietly. “That doesn’t mean he doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”
“Come on, Jack,” Derek said. “You can’t listen to Scotty. He’s got a thing for Garrett, and if he thinks Garrett likes you, then of course he’s going to say whatever to get you to leave.”
“Well, I should have listened to him when he said I was just Garrett’s latest conquest,” Jack said tightly. “When he told me that Garrett would just fuck me then dump me. But whatever,” Jack waved absently. “Maybe that’s all I wanted, too—a good fucking.” He spun around and walked away without giving them a chance to reply.
Derek and Bailey didn’t follow him.
The bedroom swam before Jack as he entered and closed the door hard behind him, then dropped back against it. “Fuck,” he choked and covered his eyes with his hand, jaw clenching. He chased away every invading thought that implied he might still have feelings for Garrett. He didn’t. He was just pissed—pissed that Garrett seemed pissed at him.
Come on, Jacko, stop playing mind games with yourself.
Jack shook his head, throat squeezing. “Not now, Jill,” he whispered shakily. “I don’t want to hear it.” He lowered his hand and cleared his throat, his eyes bleary as he stared at the bed.
If you think that kiss meant shit—think again.
“Fuck you,” Jack rasped. “I couldn’t care less.”
He shoved away from the door and walked to the bed. He thrust out images of him and Garrett and focused on his recent activity with Lucas. Everything would be okay once he and Lucas did their skit. The twins were amazing, but their lovemaking was too tender to rid him of Garrett’s memory—he needed someone like Lucas to take care of it. An
d then Derek would deal with the final touches. He would be fine. He just had to make it through a few more days, that was all.
“Should be easy enough,” Jack mumbled and sat on the edge of the bed. He looked at Jill’s picture, framed and propped on the nightstand. Sometimes he had to force himself not to put it away, out of sight. It hurt to see her smiling face, and eyes so full of life. Life that had promised her a fulfilling future, a long life. An ache pinched his jaw and his eyes filled. Life had broken its promise to her…just as Aaron had done.
Jack looked away and wiped his eyes then lay down on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Had Jill honestly believed true love existed? How could she after Aaron?
Love was an illusion.
But then—what wasn’t an illusion in this fucking world?
♦ ♦ ♦
“Hey, Jilly bean, can I talk to you about something—” Jack halted abruptly and stared at his sobbing sister. “Jill?” he whispered. She lay on her side in the hospital bed, her back to him, hugging a pillow. Her fragile body trembled and shook as she tried to muffle her cries in the pillow.
Was there more bad news from the doctor? How much worse could it get?
It scared him to see her crying like this. Jill had always been so strong, even in this situation. “Jill?” Jack’s voice wavered, and he hurried to the bed. “Jill, what’s wrong?” When he touched her shoulder, she let loose of the pillow and sat up, flinging her arms around his neck, hugging tight, a new rush of sobs breaking forth. Jack clung to her, tears burning. “What’s wrong?”
Jill trembled in his arms, her face pressed to his neck. Tears smeared his skin. She choked on her sobs, her words cracking and breaking. “He…he left me, Jack…he just…”
“What?” Jack frowned. “Who?”
Another hard flurry of sobs forced out. “Aaron.”
Aaron? Aaron wouldn’t leave her. Not ever. He was crazy about her. “Jill, what’re you talking about?” Jack untangled her arms and drew back. He rubbed the tears from her face, but more quickly took their place. “Aaron left you? He loves you, he wouldn’t do that.”
