Righting Our Wrongs (Paths To Love)

by Grahame Claire

  “Nella mentioned him. Said he’s a real sweet boy.”

  I yanked off the mitts and tossed them on the counter.

  “If you want him to sit by you, that’s fine.” Mulaney was the picture of innocence as she tossed a handful of nuts into her mouth.

  “There’s some stuff I gotta do in the barn,” I said, getting out of there as fast as I could.

  “At least we figured out how to make him work,” she said as the screen door slammed behind me.

  I hauled across the backyard, trying to shove the image of Juliana and that cocksucker out of my head. The harder I tried, the more vivid it became.

  With too much force, I dropped a bale of hay on the barn floor and snatched a pitchfork.

  I stabbed at the straw, spreading it across the wood planks. Blue nudged at me with her nose.

  “I’m getting to your stall.”

  The horse blew out her breath and nudged me again.

  “Now, huh?”

  I slid into her stall, and she rested her chin on my shoulder. I stroked the soft fur on her neck.

  “What’s the matter?”

  I drew back to look at her face. “Is it time?”

  Earlier in the day I’d noticed that her udder was leaking, a sure sign the foal was going to come soon. Dropping to a squat, I checked underneath. Still leaking. But she hadn’t seemed distressed earlier the way she did now.

  Quickly, I did the math in my head. Shit. Blue had another month to go before foaling. I should’ve realized that when I’d first noticed the leakage, but I’d been too consumed in my own problems. I smoothed my hand down her neck and over her side to cover up the panic that something serious might be wrong. “We can do this. I’m right here.”

  I thought for a minute then began to do a Whole Horse Exam to check her vitals. I’d just gotten started when I heard my dad’s voice.

  “Mitch? You about ready to eat, son?”

  “I think Blue’s ready to foal,” I said as he and Mr. Morgan approached.

  Dad stroked the horse’s nose. “Early, ain’t it?”

  “Yeah, but she’s lactating, so it’s gotta be close to time.”

  Mr. Morgan took a step forward. “Let me take a look. We had something similar happen a few years ago.” He moved into the stall, examined Blue, and immediately frowned. “This milk is yellowish. Think you better call the vet.”

  As soon as I was out the barn door, I took off at a sprint toward the house.

  “Blue’s udder is leaking,” I said, barreling through the kitchen door out of breath. “Call Doc Isaac.”

  Granddaddy picked up the phone on the wall.

  Mulaney grabbed her coat and pulled it on.

  Stone stopped short as he wandered back into the kitchen. “What’s wrong?”

  My eyes immediately went to Juliana’s; she was standing next to Mama near the stove. “I think something may be wrong with Blue.”

  “You call the vet?” Stone asked, already headed toward the back door.

  “Granddaddy’s on the phone now.”

  Juliana stroked Blue’s head and whispered soothing words in her ear while her father continued to examine the mare.

  His face was grim when he looked up. “There’s a chance she’s about to abort.”

  “Doc Isaac is on his way.” Granddaddy knelt beside Blue to check for himself. “She was fine this morning.”

  “These things can happen like that.” Mr. Morgan snapped his fingers.

  I’d noticed the milk leaking earlier but thought it was normal and didn’t say anything. How could I admit that to all of them? What if I’d hurt my horse or her foal by acting like I was already a vet when the truth was I didn’t know my ass from a hole in the ground? I slipped out and ran from the backyard around the house to the front porch.

  No sign of the vet. I kicked at a rock and started pacing in front of the steps.

  “She’s going to be okay.”

  Juliana’s soft voice jolted me to a stop. I couldn’t turn around, knowing full well the sight of her would do me in.

  “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

  The sound of her boots on the grass grew closer. “I’m not.”

  Unable to take it, I turned toward her. She leaned against the railing, that face I loved more than anything overshadowed with concern.

  “I thought they were okay. She’s been fine since I got home.” I lifted my ball cap off my head and plowed a hand through my hair before I pulled it back on.

  “I know you’ve been watching her like a hawk.” There was a twinge of the old affection she’d once held for me in her tone.

  “I haven’t seen this before. You’d think all that time I’ve spent working with animals, I’d know what yellowish milk meant. Maybe I’m not cut out for this.” I shoved my hands in my pockets and scanned down the driveway for the vet.

  “You’re not fully trained yet,” she defended.

  “Might as well be for all the time I’ve spent with Doc Isaac.” A sense I’d done something that couldn’t be fixed weighed heavy on me.

  Juliana pushed off the railing and planted her hands on my shoulders. I continued to stare down the long, dirt driveway as her sweet scent invaded my nostrils.

  “Mitch.” How long had it been since she’d said my name? It brought back memories of nights under the stars, she and I tangled together. “Look at me.”

  Reluctantly, I dragged my eyes to hers. “This is why you’re going to be an amazing veterinarian. Animals can feel how much you care.”

  “I guess people can’t.” The words were out of my mouth before I could take them back.

  Headlights shone on us as a truck rumbled down the drive.

  “Doc’s here.” She dropped her arms to her sides, and I backed away.

  He’d barely opened the door before I was on him. “Lactation is yellowish. She seems okay, but Mr. Morgan thinks the foal might be at risk.”

  Doc Isaac thrust out his hand, and we shook. “We’ll see what’s going on.”

  He grabbed his bag, and we hustled back to the barn.

  Everyone was there by now, and they all parted to let us through. I stayed right at his side, determined to save my horse and her foal.

  Doc swiped at the liquid and held his finger up to his nose. “When was she bred?”

  “Two hundred eighty-seven days,” I said.

  He felt her undercarriage and along her sides. “She may be ready to go. I’m concerned about the color and smell of the milk, but she’s far enough along we might be okay here.”

  Doc barked out orders for supplies we needed, in command and with no trace of the panic I felt. I barely remembered where some of the items he asked for were even though we used them frequently. I felt like I was moving through molasses. How did he remain so calm under pressure?

  Mama touched my shoulder and squeezed. It was only then I realized my hands were shaking. She didn’t say a word, her confidence in me evident through her touch. Her support calmed me a fraction…until I saw Juliana’s new boyfriend put his arm around her shoulders.

  She didn’t exactly lean into him, but she didn’t shrug him off either, and every ounce of fear I had turned to anger. I flexed my fists, itching to teach him not to touch what was mine. Except she wasn’t anymore.

  “Mitch.” The vet looked at me expectantly.

  I tore my gaze away from them. “Sorry, Doc. What was that?”

  He leaned closer, his voice low. “It would be best if everyone cleared out. To keep her calm.”

  Had he met my family? Foaling this horse would be easier than getting them to leave this barn. If there was any chance, I knew who could do it.

  Grandmama stood close to Blue, stretching to stroke behind her ears. “I know what he wants,” she said as I approached.

  “He thinks it would be best for her.”

  Her mouth drew into a stubborn set. “She needs the people who love her.”

  “We don’t want to stress her out.”

  She p
lanted a soft kiss on the end of the mare’s nose. “I know what it’s like. We don’t want an audience when we’re at our weakest.” Her words were for the horse, yet they were sense when everything around me was chaos. She turned to the group. “Let’s give the good doctor some room to work.”

  Everyone looked at her before they followed her out. Juliana and the Paris pretty boy were the last to leave the barn. I tried to shake it off, though it clawed at me, and the newfound quiet set me on edge.

  “When did you notice the milk coming out?” Doc Issac asked.

  I hesitated, not ready to admit it. “Around lunchtime.”

  “Wish you’d have called me then.” He grabbed his stethoscope from his bag. “But we are where we are now, so this is no different than the times we’ve done this before.”

  I knelt beside Doc Isaac. “I know.” But I didn’t. I was scared my horse was in trouble and we couldn’t get her out of it.

  Chapter Five

  Juliana

  Mitch stormed from the barn, a lifeless figure in his arms. He started when he noticed me.

  “Go to the house.”

  I covered my mouth with my hand. I’d heard everything, knew the foal hadn’t made it. But seeing him made it real in an agonizing way.

  “It’s not your fault.”

  He didn’t speak, just kept moving away from the house toward the pasture. I stayed on his heels, practically running to keep up with his long strides.

  By the time we reached his favorite tree, I was breathless and cold, though I barely felt it. He laid the small animal on a blanket at the base of the tree and looked around as if he wasn’t entirely sure where he was.

  “I forgot a shovel.”

  He took off for the barn. I stayed behind with the little foal who’d never had a chance. Tears gathered in my eyes. I swiped at them as my heart ached.

  The lullaby my parents used to sing came out before I realized what I was doing. Softly, I sang, hoping to bring some kind of peace to the sweet angel.

  When Mitch returned with the shovel, he stabbed at the earth on the side of the tree where the sun set. I continued to sing as he dug a hole big enough for the foal, laid him in the ground, and covered him with dirt.

  Once it was finished, we stood there staring at the grave until Mitch broke the eerie silence.

  “I’m not going back to school.”

  I snapped my head toward him. “You’ve only got a semester left. And what about vet school?”

  “I panicked, Jules. I couldn’t get my head in the game, and that foal is dead because of me. Doc Issac pretty much said so.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and turned away as if he couldn’t bear to look at the grave a second longer.

  “It’s not easy to lose an animal, but what happened tonight isn’t your fault.”

  “I got Blue’s foal killed because I thought I knew what I was doing. If I’d called the vet earlier—”

  “No. Blue doesn’t blame you. Nobody does.”

  “You weren’t in there. You don’t know what happened.”

  “Yeah, I do.” He wheeled around. “I was right outside the whole time.”

  “You should’ve been at the house.”

  Even in the dark I could make out the crimson stain on his cheeks as his temper rose.

  “I wanted to be around. In case you needed me.” His laugh was a hollow sound as it floated toward the night sky. “You’re not quitting school.” I didn’t want to argue about us. Neither one of us was in the right frame of mind to tackle that.

  “I am.”

  “What about the football game? You going to that?”

  He yanked on the brim of his ball cap. “I don’t know.”

  “You’re going. Or are you going to let the team down?”

  A bitter noise escaped him. “I’m good at that.”

  “When y’all lost to Notre Dame this year, did you quit?”

  He glared at me. “No.”

  “Did you want to?”

  “No.”

  “Then why are you giving up on everything you’ve ever wanted now?”

  “I know you aren’t comparing a football game to that foal’s life,” he said on a low growl.

  “I’m not saying they’re of equal value, but there’s a parallel here.”

  “If we lose a football game, nobody dies.”

  I recoiled. “So all the injured animals you’ve helped over the years mean nothing?”

  He kicked at a root of the tree. “Right now, this is the one that counts.”

  I stepped in front of him. “It’s fine if being a vet isn’t what you want to do, but don’t make a rash decision in the heat of the moment. At least sleep on it.”

  “I don’t need to.”

  “Just because you’re angry with me doesn’t mean you should ignore my advice.”

  Mitch stared at me. “Angry? That doesn’t even begin to cover it.” He pointed at me. “And don’t stand there and act like you know a thing about how I feel. You got what you wanted.”

  “You broke up with me. How is that getting what I wanted?” I threw my hands up.

  “Paris was number one, all else be damned.”

  “That’s not true.”

  “Isn’t it?”

  I felt the accusation to my core. “You’re the one that gave up on our future, not me.”

  “Me?” He touched his index finger to the center of his chest. “Now I’m the quitter?”

  “Why did you give up on us the second things got hard?”

  He dug the tip of the shovel into the ground. “I can’t trust you. We can’t get that back.”

  “You won’t even try.”

  “You haven’t given me a reason to,” he shot back.

  “It was a once-in–a-lifetime opportunity.”

  “So were we! You had a commitment to me!” he shouted. “What if we were married and had kids, but then another ‘opportunity’ came along? It was hard enough when you left just me, but if you did that to our children?”

  My hand flew to my neck as it felt like my air flow had been cut off. This was the anger talking. Except he looked way too sincere for my liking.

  His glare was severe, cutting into me as I struggled to find words for my defense. He gripped the handle of the shovel until his knuckles were white.

  “You quit on us because I did something you didn’t like,” I finally said.

  “Well, I’m over it. So you and your new fancy-pants boyfriend can have Paris or whatever.” He stalked toward the house.

  “Mitch Jacobs, don’t you dare walk away from me.”

  He didn’t break stride as he called back to me. “I didn’t, Jules. You did.”

  Chapter Six

  Mitch

  A pillow whacked me in the face. I squinted as sunlight streamed in my bedroom.

  “I did all your chores, and you’re still not up.”

  Mulaney hit me again with the pillow, this time in the chest.

  “I can’t make many more excuses for your lazy ass.” She sat on the edge of the bed, shoving at me to make room for her.

  “I’m not lazy,” I grumbled, throwing my arm over my eyes.

  “Sleeping in until eight. Your mama ain’t gonna let you get away with that two days in a row.”

  “It was a late night.” Pain latched itself in my chest. The foal. My mare. Juliana.

  “Blue is doing okay this morning.”

  I bolted upright. I’d been so busy wallowing in my own misery, I couldn’t even get out of bed to check on my horse. Yet another reason I wasn’t meant to be a vet.

  My sister put a hand on my chest. “She knows you’re sorry.”

  The sympathy in her words caught me off guard. Underneath the tough exterior, Mulaney was a good person, but compassion wasn’t her strong suit. I needed her abrasive self to come back to shake me out of this torment.

  She obliged me by slapping me in the arm. “Get up. I need to get your brother a Christmas present.”

  “I’m not going s
hopping, much less riding in the car with you for a few hours to a mall.”

  “Who said anything about a mall?”

  “Where else are you going to find him anything?”

  “Just get up. While you shower, I’ll see if I can sneak out some leftover breakfast.”

  Our mother was the kindest woman, except when it came to discipline. If we didn’t get up to eat before our chores, we didn’t get breakfast. Around here, after eight was practically lunchtime.

  “What did everybody say?” I asked hesitantly.

  Mulaney stood and patted my cheek, just like Grandmama always did. “That it’s a damn shame about that foal. And how proud we are of you for trying to save him. Blue is okay because of you.”

  I shook off her words, certain she was lying to make me feel better. “Give me twenty minutes, and I’ll be down.”

  “What the hell are we doing at a high school basketball game?” The worn wood bleachers were hard on my ass from the second I sat down. “You spent three hours giving me the grand tour of every oil well in this county. Just because you’re obsessed with black gold doesn’t mean everyone else is. Besides, I thought we were going shopping for Stone.”

  “This is your alma mater. Where’s your sense of nostalgia?” Mulaney glanced around the gym, turning her attention to the court when the referee blew the whistle. “And since when do you prefer shopping to sports?”

  Since the last time I was in this gym Juliana had stolen a kiss that led to us making love in the bed of my truck out in a corn field. Being back at our old school hurt like hell. We’d ruled these halls as a couple our senior year. Would’ve gotten together a lot sooner if I’d had the guts to take our friendship to the next level when I first wanted to. That girl had mixed me up since grade school, and I guess she still did. But I needed to figure out a way to get past that considering she’d moved on. Man, that was a hard thing to live with. Juliana belonged with me, but the way she ditched our plans to live together and left me hanging made me question our entire relationship.

  She’d lied to me about something big. I hadn’t reacted well to the news about her trip, but damn it, she’d basically dropped a bomb and left me to deal with the rubble. I still hadn’t dug my way out, and now that she was back, I felt like I was buried alive.