by Vivi Barnes
“You know I love you, don’t you?” I whisper, the words easy when I say them to her, and her arms tighten around me.
“I love you, too, honey,” she says. She releases me and dabs at her eyes. “Now go have a wonderful time.”
...
The restaurant is in downtown Norfolk at the top of an elegant, historic hotel. Grandfather is already seated next to a window overlooking the city. His eyes light up and he stands as I walk toward the table with the hostess. As always, I’m impressed by how “put together” Grandfather always appears—perfectly pressed gray suit, clean-shaven, silver hair only slightly receding, sharp gray eyes that always soften for me. The only time I’ve ever seen him even slightly out of sorts was when he came to the hospital after I nearly drowned trying to escape the clutches of Bill Sykes. I’ll never forget the fear that tightened his eyes when he saw me in the hospital bed, or the rumpled, untucked shirt that told me he’d probably been pacing around the hallways until I woke up. Funny the tiny details I noticed, but with someone like Grandfather, they mattered. Looking back, that moment was when I truly started to feel like I was part of a real family.
“You look lovely, Olivia,” he says, his voice thick with emotion. He pulls out my chair for me to sit down. “Happy Valentine’s Day.”
“Thanks. To you, too.”
The server shows up to take our drink order, so Grandfather orders a merlot for himself and a glass of sparkling water for me. He steeples his hands under his chin when she walks away. “Now about this bracelet—”
I paste on a bright smile. Grandfather doesn’t waste time. “Oh, the bracelet. Yeah, apparently I have a secret admirer. One of Kade’s friends.”
“Secret admirer?” He sighs. “Look, Olivia, I know the children who go to your school are rather affluent, but if someone’s spending that much money on you—”
“Don’t worry, I’m going to give it back to him. He stuck a rose in my locker, too.” I wrinkle my nose. Thinking on it, it probably was Theo, after all, who gave me the bracelet. And maybe I didn’t lock the car door like I thought I did. Now I feel like an idiot texting Sam.
Although there was the rose on my pillow. But Theo could’ve paid a member of the staff to put it there. He’d be proud of himself for that one.
“Speaking of bracelets, and one of the reasons I was rather confused about this bracelet you received today, I have something for you,” Grandfather says after the server comes back to deliver our drinks. “It’s something I’ve held on to for a while.” He slides a blue Tiffany box over to me. More jewelry. This box is slightly faded, though. “It belonged to your mother. Well, it was your great-grandmother’s, then your grandmother’s, then she gave it to your mother. Much like the locket you wear.”
My fingers automatically move to touch the locket at my throat that I never remove. The pictures of my grandparents and my mother inside the little heart are the reason Jack found out my grandfather was alive—the same day he was supposed to hack into my grandfather’s business account. Well, the day I was supposed to hack into it—my very first target. The memory still haunts me. I was this close to stealing money from my own family.
I pull the white ribbon and open the box. Inside is not what I was expecting—instead of expensive jewelry, it’s a small antique gold heart charm, connected by a chain to a key that appears to fit in the tiny carved keyhole. “Oh, wow.” The fact that it belonged to the women in the family means more to me than anything. “Thank you.”
“The bracelet your mother wore with it was broken, so I was going to get you a new one until I remembered you already have one that you wear all the time.” He points at Jack’s slender chain around my wrist. “It’s nice—where did you get it?”
I yank my arm back, my face burning. Hopefully it’s dim enough in here that he won’t notice my blush.
“A…a friend gave it to me. I thought it was pretty so I’ve kept it.”
His eyebrows pinch slightly as he stares at me, and I have a strong feeling he’s remembering Jack. I unclasp the bracelet nervously and smile at him. “Thanks for the charm. I love it.”
He doesn’t say anything for a moment as he watches me slide the heart on the chain. The server comes back to take our appetizer orders, and when she walks away, he says, “You know, Olivia, I worry—”
“Oh, there’s Natalie.” I wave at a girl I barely know who’s in a couple classes with me, sitting across from her boyfriend. She looks at me and waves slightly, then goes back to eating. I feel stupid, considering I’ve hardly ever spoken to her, but for the moment, I’m grateful she’s provided a distraction.
“Didn’t look like she recognized you,” Grandfather says. “Do you want to go say hi?”
“No, it’s okay.”
He takes a sip of wine, studying me. “Not really a friend of yours, huh?”
“Well, she’s in a couple classes with me.”
“Ah.” He sips his wine, his eyes still on me. I know I’m about to get the “why don’t you make more friends” speech. Ever since I moved in, he’s worried that I’m not having enough of a regular teen life, even going so far as to set up dinners at his country club with some of his friends and their daughters.
“I do have friends, Grandfather,” I tell him before he can start. “You’ve met Emerson.”
“Yes, and I like her very much,” he says. “But she’s the only friend I’ve met since you’ve been here. There are other nice girls, you know.”
I take a deep breath. I want to snap back that I know this, that I have absolutely nothing in common with most of the girls who go to Dalton Academy for the Ridiculously Loaded, not to mention the fact that I really don’t have the bright personality that Emerson does to attract friendships anyway, even if I did want them. My natural avoidance of people who could ask me about my past means I’ll probably always be somewhat of a loner.
But I keep the thoughts to myself. Considering Grandfather is one of the very few adults who’s ever cared about what’s going on in my life, I know I should appreciate his concern.
He sighs. “Okay. I know you’re tired of hearing it, but you don’t ever go out or anything. I just want to make sure you are enjoying your life here. I don’t want you to feel like you should be attached to your previous life.”
I recognize the slight jab at Jack but choose to ignore it. “I am enjoying it. Seriously. You’ve given me everything I could possibly want. I don’t need anything else.”
He smiles. “Okay, so back to the fancy bracelet you got today—”
By the end of the meal, I have him pretty much convinced that Theo’s behind the bracelet and that I’m going to return it to him. I keep my hand under the table as often as possible throughout dinner the rest of the night, my fingers playing with my mother’s tiny heart charm on Jack’s bracelet. Jack, why couldn’t you have been just a normal boyfriend?
Not that I expect to get an answer to that. Ever.
Chapter Six
JACK
Nancy is in the kitchen when I go downstairs in the morning. It’s already ten. Sleeping in today felt good.
“No school for you, either, huh?” she asks, eyeing the clock.
I shake my head and glance at Sam, who’s already sitting at the table, calmly eating a bagel and scrolling through her phone. She doesn’t seem as agitated as usual, which is to say she’s not glaring at me.
“This is your senior year—you should be in class,” Nancy says.
“It’s fine.” Besides, I can always adjust my grade if I need to, something Nancy knows well enough, though she doesn’t approve. Stealing from banks is okay, but changing your grades is not, as far as her weird morals are concerned. Well, stealing from banks was okay before she got on this no-hacking kick.
“So where are you headed today?” she asks.
“Nowhere,” I say. Normally I wouldn’t hesitate to tell Nancy, but this feels way too private.
“Ah,” she says, frowning in a disappointed way, and by the slightly
guilty expression on Sam’s face, I’m guessing she told her.
“I’ll go warm up the car,” Sam says, draining her coffee.
“Did anyone come forward about the stolen money?” I ask Nancy after Sam leaves.
She frowns at me. “No. Nobody knows anything about it. I talked to my friend at the bank this morning. She’s going to get a receipt.” She hesitates, her eyes staying on me. “Z, this drive—”
I raise a hand to interrupt what I know she’s going to say. “Don’t start. I’m just checking things out, that’s all.”
“You’ve both moved on. You said so yourself.”
I don’t say anything. Funny, because I know Nancy would like nothing more than for me to be with Liv and stop hacking. Maybe this is her way of trying out reverse psychology. Why she thinks that would actually work on me is the bigger question.
Her lips twist slightly as she stares at me. “Okay, fine. See you at dinner?”
I nod. “I’ll be here.”
Sam grins when I show up at her car. “About time. Ready?” she asks, the excitement in her voice unmistakable. It makes me nervous. Maybe I should’ve taken a chance on freezing on my Ducati rather than involve her.
In a couple hours we’ll see Liv. For better or for worse, I’ll finally be able to move on with my life. And I’ll learn to live with this empty pit of a feeling in my heart when she says she’s ready to move on with hers.
“Are we going to stop by her school?” Sam asks.
“I figured we’d just head to her house.”
“What if she doesn’t go home right after school? And her grandfather could be there. You said you want to avoid him, right?”
“Yeah. Okay, so I guess we go to her school, if we knew where she went to school.”
She looks over at me, her eyebrow raised. “I’m shocked you didn’t search for that yourself.”
“I told you, I cut ties with her.” Truthfully, I do know where she goes to school. But I don’t want Sam to know I looked her up, either.
“Well, lucky for you that I already found out. She goes to some rich private school called Dalton Academy. Snootiest school in the state. We can stop for lunch to kill time before it lets out. And I already have it programmed in my GPS.”
“Of course you do,” I mutter, though she’s right—it’s the only choice. I definitely don’t want to run into her grandfather at the house. That’d be a little hard to explain, although just explaining to Liv herself why I’m there will be hard enough.
Once we get to Norfolk, we stop for lunch, then head to the school. Sam shows her driver’s license to the guard at the gate and charms him into believing she’s picking up a friend. Probably because her Camaro fits right in here. And because he’s a guy. Sam’s smile has that effect on most of the male population.
“Fancy,” Sam says, whistling at the various luxury sports cars parked in the lot. Everything from Mercedes to Jags and even a Viper are situated in the spaces like they’re doing the pavement a favor. As the students trickle through the parking lot, the nerves take over. What if she freaks out when she sees me? Maybe Sam should’ve texted her to warn her we’re coming.
Sam pulls around to take a spot midway up as soon as a car leaves. About three minutes later, I see Liv walking alongside another girl.
And a guy.
Two guys, actually. One is clearly paying attention to Liv’s blond friend, wrapping his arms around her and making her laugh. My jaw clenches as I watch the other one—a tall, skinny kid wearing red basketball shorts—move in on Liv, his arm wrapping around her possessively. He leans down to either kiss her cheek or say something in her ear. Liv pulls away from him. She’s not laughing, but she didn’t shove him away, either.
The guy calls out something else, then turns to walk toward his car. For no apparent reason, I make a note of his vehicle—a red late-model BMW convertible.
“Breathe, Z,” Sam says to me, tugging at the fist I’m driving into the leather seat. I’d forgotten she was even next to me. “You knew this when you came up here.”
I nod shortly. Of course I did. Someone sent her roses and gifts—am I really that surprised that she’d have a boyfriend? It shouldn’t bug me. It shouldn’t make me want to get out of this car and kick out his headlights. She’s moved on…just like I should’ve. The barriers around my heart strengthen, and I allow my anger to melt away into indifference. “Let’s get out of here,” I tell Sam.
“Too late,” Sam says quietly, nodding toward Liv, who’s walking in our direction. We’d have to drive past her to leave, and she’d see us. As much as I wanted to talk to her before, it’s the last thing I want to do now.
Chapter Seven
LIV
I walk toward my car, leaving Emerson and Kade to make out at Kade’s car. My tired brain still can’t shake whatever is going on. Theo said he didn’t know anything about the roses in the car and on my pillow, just the one in my locker that he seemed to think was such a sly move. And nothing at all about the bracelet. At lunch, I even stole his phone and spent my next class period hacking into it in the media center. There was nothing about roses in his emails or his texts. No phone calls to a jewelry store. The only thing I found that creeped me out was a chat with Kade about throwing a fake party so he could get me to his house. Thankfully, Kade shut that one down fast. I turned his phone in to Lost and Found, not feeling the least bit guilty about it.
Besides, as arrogant as he is, if Theo bought me the bracelet, I’m sure he’d own up to it right away. He seemed pretty irritated that I might have a secret admirer who’s not him. As glad as I am that I couldn’t find evidence pointing at Theo, I’m back to square one.
“Hey, wait up.” Emerson joins me, looping her arm through mine. “I wish you’d tell me what’s going on. You haven’t been yourself. Does this have something to do with those beheaded roses yesterday?”
I shrug, my eyes following a group of girls walking past us, laughing and talking over one another about stuff that I wish mattered to me more. Life should be that easy for me, too, instead of having to worry about someone creeping on me.
Emerson sighs when I don’t say anything, her breath white in the chilly air. “Okay. Just let me know if you want to talk.”
“I will. I’m sorry. If I could tell anyone anything, it’d be you.”
“But you just need some more time. It’s okay,” Emerson says. “I’m still your friend, no matter what.”
“Thank you,” I tell her. “I really appreciate that.”
She nods, her lips twisting slightly in disappointment, then she smiles. “I was thinking about throwing a party for graduation. My parents won’t care, you know, since they’ll be in Costa Rica. Want to help me plan it?”
“Sure.” Sometimes I’m not sure who has it harder—me, who has no parents, or Emerson, whose mom and dad are never around. The only time I ever hear a bitter tone in her voice is when she talks about them. Though she appears on the outside not to care, I know she does.
“I’m going to make it an all-out event with tons of half-naked guys and kegs and all kinds of stuff my dad would disapprove of.” She lifts her chin, then chuckles ruefully. “Of course, this is me, so it’ll probably just be me, you, and Kade playing dominoes or something.”
“This is you, so you’ll have a bazillion people show up.” I laugh. “And I’ll help as long as you help keep Theo from trying to get me into the hot tub.”
“Deal.” She gives me a quick hug and slides into her car, promising to call me later. The totally normal moment between us lightens my steps as I continue toward my car. I have to remember that this is not a foster home. It’s my home. My school. My family and friends. And it’s permanent and normal. I can be normal, too. First, I need to stop looking like I have more secrets than the CIA. Emerson will stop worrying about me if I act like every other person around here. My entire past can be just that—past.
My light steps grow heavier as I get to the other side of the parking lot and notice a fa
miliar red Camaro parked a few spaces away from my car. I almost trip over my feet. Only one person I know drives a Camaro like that.
Oh, no.
So much for leaving the past in the past. I only sent her the text because I figured she’d just respond and let it go, not show up here. Or maybe she came to tell me to stay out of their lives.
Times spent with Sam crop up in my mind—the moment she convinced me to steal a shirt at that store, the hacking competitions at Monroe Street—memories from a life I’ve tried so hard to bury. We were friends, but she used that friendship to try to recruit me into their crime ring. I don’t know that I’ve forgiven her for that yet.
Of course, I forgave Jack for pretty much the same thing, so…
I look over my shoulder to see Emerson driving away. I consider flagging her down and hitching a ride, pretending I don’t notice the Camaro. But Sam might’ve already seen me, and what’s to keep her from following me to my grandfather’s house?
Taking a deep breath, I walk to my car and open the door to place my bag on my seat. The thick whomp of a car door shutting tells me there’s no use pretending I didn’t see her. I turn to face Sam, who’s now leaning against her car, grinning at me, but she’s not alone.
Jack is next to her.
My.
Heart.
Stops.
Then it starts zigzagging around my chest like it’s trying to bang its way out. Jack’s here, right in front of me, just like I’ve thought about too many times. He looks exactly like he did the last night I saw him eight months ago on my balcony—thumbs tucked in his jean pockets, leather jacket, blond hair hanging longer in front—but no, there’s a hardness in his stance that I don’t remember. He isn’t smiling at me, either. His eyes tighten as I step forward. I do see something I recognize in him, now, and it makes me go cold.
