by Roxie Ray
That pull never subsided though, and I had no idea what to make of it.
11
Niall
Fuck. That kiss.
I raced home as fast as I could, barely able to breathe. The tightness in my chest was a nearly unbearable ache at this point. The only thing that had come near to relieving the pressure was feeling the softness of her body under my hands and the sweetness of her mouth.
I ground my teeth together, fighting the urge to go right back to that pool, toss her over my shoulder, and carry her back home to fuck her senseless. I’d almost done just that only moments ago. It was a wonder I’d been able to restrain myself, especially with the way she’d been so pliant, so greedy and wanting. I hadn’t expected to see her at the pool, much less have her look at me the way she did—like she wanted me as much as I wanted her. Something in me had come undone in those moments, and I’d completely lost myself when she’d run her fingers over my chest.
I groaned as I finally made it to my house and rushed through the door. My cock throbbed with need as I replayed every second of that kiss in my mind. The way she’d dug her fingers into my skin and kissed me with a passion that matched my own had my brain short-circuiting.
I headed straight to my bedroom, gripping my cock in my hand through my swimsuit in an effort to curb the near painful throbbing. I’d never felt such an intense drive to have a woman, and I knew it had to be the mating gene that was pushing me to the edge of reason, and I had to do something to take the edge off or I just might lose my mind.
Kicking my bedroom door shut, I stripped down in seconds flat. When I wrapped my fingers around my rock-hard cock, I hissed at the sensation that rocketed through me. Fuck, I didn’t think I’d ever been this turned on in my life.
I stroked my cock hard and fast, my knees nearly buckling as white-hot pleasure coursed through my veins. Dropping onto my bed, I replayed the kiss once more, recalling every torturous detail.
My cock jerked in my hand and I groaned Brittany’s name, wishing it was her hand wrapped around me—or even better, her mouth. Fuck, that mouth. It was perfect. Warm and wet, and inviting.
Tingles raced up and down my spine, and my balls tightened as I imagined her fucking me with that perfect mouth, her head bobbing up and down on me, taking as much of me as she could and moaning all the while. I could almost hear her moans of pleasure.
My cock ached and I stroked myself faster, racing toward my release at lightning speed. I wanted Brittany so fucking bad, and my body was fully on board with the images flashing through my mind. Seconds later, I was coming, hot jets of cum splattering my chest as I gritted my teeth at the explosive intensity of my orgasm.
I panted, gasping for breath. Holy hell. I didn’t think I’d ever come so hard—and this was just going off of a memory of a kiss and my imagination of what it could lead to.
Groaning, I sank into the soft mattress. While that orgasm had felt incredible, it wasn’t enough. My cock was still rock-hard, I was still horny as fuck, and I wondered if the only thing that would put me out of my misery was taking Brittany to my bed.
I rubbed at my chest. The ache hadn’t subsided at all. What was I going to do? I couldn’t just ignore the pull between us. Not when it was driving me crazy. My need to mate with Brittany seemed to get stronger and stronger with each passing day. Pretending it didn’t exist was becoming impossible.
Sighing, I tried to rein in my out-of-control hormones. It was like I was a fucking teenager again when it came to her, barely able to contain myself. As I lay there trying to catch my breath, I played back what happened in the pool once more.
She was obviously physically attracted to me if her reaction to me in the pool was any indication. The draw to her was unlike anything I’d ever experienced, and I knew this would only intensify it. Every day that passed, it seemed to increase exponentially. At this rate, I had no choice but to tell her what was going on, and soon, or the pain might become too much to bear.
But how was I supposed to tell her I needed her as much as I needed my next breath without scaring her away? I had no idea, but I had to figure that out. And soon, before I lost control completely.
By Monday, nearly a week had passed, and I still hadn’t found the right way to tell her. She hadn’t made it easy, either. In fact, I was pretty sure Brittany was avoiding me. She stayed out of sight when I was home unless it was absolutely necessary to interact, and then she wouldn’t quite meet my eyes.
I wanted to ask her what was going on, if I’d scared her away with that kiss. She’d responded as if she wanted it too, but I wasn’t going to pretend I understood the emotions of women, much less a human woman.
I hadn’t broached the subject when we’d crossed paths. Perhaps she just needed some time to wrap her head around it and figure out what she felt, so I decided to leave her alone for now, even though my instincts screamed for me to take her in my arms and claim her as my own. As much as it pained me, if she needed time and space, I’d give it to her.
So I busied myself with work, scheduling meetings about the improvements I had in mind for the IEP.
First up was a meeting with Rahl the Nourisher who was still on the planet, but whom I’d only seen in passing. It was expected of me as the future Hollander leader to make diplomatic relations with the leaders of other planets, and I was pretty good at it. I was actually looking forward to meeting Rahl and was curious about what it was like to rule a planet at such a young age—he wasn’t even thirty yet.
We had lunch in the same courtyard where Brittany had dined with Mother and Yivonne not so long ago, and I tried hard to focus on my conversation with Rahl and not remember how sexy and gorgeous Brittany had looked in her dress that day.
“Good day, Nourisher,” I said, rising from the table and bowing deeply as he approached. It was the custom to greet other leaders with their formal titles, but Rahl looked distinctly uncomfortable with it.
“Please,” he said. “Call me Rahl.” His voice was clear and smooth and reminded me of the running water of a calm stream. He bowed in return, then gave me a friendly smile.
I smiled back, already liking the guy. It was clear he wasn’t big on formality and pretention, something I definitely respected.
“Then you must call me Niall,” I replied, gesturing for him to have a seat. “It’s wonderful to finally meet you. Tell me, what do you think of Hollander so far?”
He joined me at the table, glancing around at our surroundings. “I must admit, it’s quite beautiful. One of the loveliest planets I’ve visited by far. However, I must say that my home planet holds my heart, and Hollander can’t quite compare.”
I chuckled. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
While I personally thought Hollander to be the most beautiful of all the planets, I’d been to Macros, and found it to be high on my list of the best places I’d seen.
“Your springtime weather is quite similar to what we have on Macros,” he said. “It seems I chose a good time to visit.”
“Indeed. Spring is my favorite, though winter is quite magnificent as well.”
“I wouldn’t know too much about that.” Rahl chuckled, his large green eyes bright. They were several shades darker than his pale green skin and perfectly matched the green tendrils that were threaded through his curly brown hair. He looked exactly like a leader of Macros should, in my opinion.
Macros was a one-season planet, always lush and green, full of the widest varieties of plants, animals, and wildlife in all the known universe. Its people were one with nature and appeared to be part of it themselves.
Rahl himself reminded me of the ancient trees the planet was known for—strong and sturdy, vibrant and tall, but also long and lithe. He somehow managed to look both graceful and powerful at the same time.
“So, how are you finding leadership of an entire planet? Does it suit you?” I asked, genuinely curious.
Rahl gave me a small smile and simply said, “My father’s legacy is a lot to live up to.”
I liked him even more for his candid response and found myself asking more questions over the course of the meal. He reminded me a lot of myself—I had my own father’s legacy to live up to. It had to be intimidating to come into power following on the heels of a beloved leader like Rahl’s father had been—and like my own was now. I could certainly see the two of us becoming friends, and I told him as much as our meal came to an end.
“You should come visit soon,” Rahl said in suggestion. “I would love to host you and your family on my planet. I was just saying so to your brother yesterday.”
“I’d like that,” I replied, and truly meant it. Perhaps I would bring Brittany along as well. I could just imagine her face when she saw the lush forests and thousands of islands the planet was known for.
And just like that, my mind was firmly back on the one woman I couldn’t seem to stop thinking about. If I ever wanted to get anywhere with her, I’d have to get her to stop avoiding me.
Rahl and I said our goodbyes after we finished lunch, and I decided to head to the office and spend the afternoon getting ahead on some work, hoping it would distract me from thoughts of Brittany, but of course that was impossible. I was reviewing some IEP paperwork and came across some trade requests from various planets—one of which was the top choice on Brittany’s original application. Without a second thought, I tossed it aside.
Maybe it was wrong, but I couldn’t even consider the possibility of putting her name on the list for possible trade candidates. A tiny bit of guilt weighed on me, but what else was I supposed to do? She was my mate, and I couldn’t stomach the idea of sending her away, especially not when I felt like we’d made so much progress since I first brought her to Hollander nearly a month ago. Funny how the tables had turned and now she was the one avoiding me. But I had to be patient when it came to Brittany. I would wait—as long as I could, at least.
Two days later, it seemed like perhaps she’d avoided me as long as possible.
I walked into the house after a long day of meetings, stopping in my tracks when I smelled something absolutely mouthwatering, like nothing I’d never smelled before.
I followed my nose into the kitchen, surprised to find Brittany stirring something in a saucepan.
“Hi,” I said dumbly, apparently unable to make use of my words. The sight of her set off all my primal urges, which was probably the mating gene at play, but I couldn’t help the way I felt each time I saw her.
“Hey,” she said softly, her cheeks turning a lovely shade of pink as she bit her lip, not quite meeting my eyes.
“You’re cooking?” I wanted to smack myself in the head for my lack of game here. But I couldn’t seem to think straight when she was around.
Brittany nodded, finally meeting my eyes. An electric current of awareness passed between us, and I found myself stepping closer.
She quickly looked back down at whatever she was cooking. “I thought it would be nice if I cooked something for you. The cook had to leave early. She said she’d drop by one of your favorite meals, but I told her not to worry.” She glanced up again. “I hope that’s okay.”
“Judging by the smell, it’s way more than okay.” I came up beside her and looked over her shoulder. “What is it?”
“It’s one of my favorite recipes from back home, a tomato-based pasta dish. I hope it tastes okay. I had to modify some of the ingredients because what you have here is different from what’s available on Earth, but it’s as close as I could get it.”
Something swelled in my chest—something different than the usual pull of the mating gene, and I didn’t know what to make of it. The fact that she wanted to cook one of her favorite dishes for me had me smiling a goofy grin, and the urge to reach out and touch her, even just to brush a stray hair back from her face, was hard to resist.
Brittany turned around, biting her lip when she realized just how closely we were standing. We just stared at each other for what felt like an eternity, and I was aware of every atom of space between us.
After a moment, she cleared her throat. “Well, um, I guess I’ll head to my room now. It’s ready. I hope you like it.”
She moved around me quickly, but I reached out and gripped her wrist. A buzzing sensation skated up my arm, and she glanced back at me, eyes wide.
“Would you like to join me for dinner?”
Brittany blinked, and I gave her what I hoped was a friendly smile and not that of a crazed man who was seconds away from pulling her closer and kissing her senseless once more.
“I… I’d like that.”
I nearly sighed with relief. Okay, so maybe we were now past the avoidance stage. She plated the meal for us, and I carried them both into the dining room. For the first few moments, we ate in silence, and I was afraid we were right back to awkward. I needed to do something to break the ice. This was the longest we’d been around each other since that kiss. I wanted to say something about it, but that was decidedly not the best tactic if I wanted her to be at ease around me again.
I settled on something more benign. “Have you been studying any more of the Hollander language?”
I must have touched on the right subject because Brittany’s face lit up with excitement. “Actually, yes. I’ve been practicing, and I found an application on the Holopad that helps. It’s probably for toddlers,” she said with a laugh. “But I think I’m learning.”
I grinned. “Want to practice?”
She nodded eagerly and went to turn off her communicator. “Let me show you what I’ve learned first.”
Her sentences were simple and a little stilted, but I was thoroughly impressed by how far she’d come in less than two weeks. I told her as much and was rewarded with a beautiful smile. Throughout dinner—which tasted as delicious as it smelled—I taught her a few more words and phrases that would give her a bit more of a challenge.
There were quite a few terribly butchered attempts, and she hadn’t quite mastered the right inflection, but her effort was remarkable, as was the resilience with which she continued to try. She wasn’t one to give up easily—a trait I more than admired.
“Imagine how much you would know if we practiced daily,” I said with a chuckle when she turned her communicator back on. “You might not even need that communicator after a while.”
Her gaze landed on my mouth, and I wondered what she was thinking about, especially when another blush crept up her cheeks. Was she remembering that epic kiss? Did she think about it all the time like I did?
The tension in the air was thick as I stared back at her, willing her to look up at me. When she finally did, she blinked furiously, her face turning even redder.
Abruptly, she pushed her chair back and stood. “I need to get to bed,” she said in a rush. “It’s been a long day.”
Before I could comment on the fact that the sun hadn’t even set yet, she was darting out of the room and disappearing down the hallway.
The emptiness I felt at not having her near was nothing compared to the disappointment at her running off. I sighed, leaning back in my chair. I’d thought we were improving our relationship a little, but it seemed Brittany was going to need a little more time. I certainly didn’t want to push her before she was ready to acknowledge there was something between us, but I hoped I could wait her out. If the growing ache in my chest was any indicator, time might be running out.
By Friday, I knew my patience was running thin. She’d gone back to avoiding me once more, and I wasn’t sure if I could keep waiting on Brittany to come to me. I wanted this to be on her terms. I wanted to believe she would come around on her own and realize the kiss we’d shared had only been the beginning of what could be amazing if she’d let it.
But at this point I wasn’t sure that would happen. She was stubborn, I’d give her that. And I had a nagging feeling there was more to it than the fact she didn’t want to complicate our working relationship or that she was unsure of me.
There was a bigger reason she was staying away from me, and I want
ed to get to the bottom of it. The problem was, I couldn’t seem to get her to hang around long enough to figure it out.
“I don’t know what to do,” I told Soren that afternoon. I’d come to see him up at the palace because the ache in my chest had increased to the point where it was becoming hard to breathe. So much so that I was starting to worry. “What will happen if she doesn’t come around?”
Soren grimaced. “There aren’t many details about what happens if the mating gene is ignored, but everything I’ve read indicates the need to mate with her will become all-consuming, and it could come to a point where you may not have complete control of yourself.”
I blinked at him, appalled at what he was saying. There was no way I would devolve into something too primal. Was there?
The look of concern on Soren’s face said differently. “You need to tell her, Niall. You can’t just keep pretending this doesn’t exist. Brittany needs to know everything and be aware of what this is doing to you.” He ran a hand over his jaw. “I mean, you’re practically torturing yourself here.”
I sighed. “I know. But I don’t want to pressure her. I don’t want her to feel like she was tricked or feel like she has to accept the fact she’s my mate when she might not want to. I want it to happen naturally, for her to come to me.”
Hell, I’d told her as much. I was just waiting on her to give me the signal that she wouldn’t be opposed to any advances. But I had to admit, it was starting to become more than I could take.
Soren shook his head. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea at this point. If you keep waiting, who’s to say she’ll ever take that step? Meanwhile, you keep getting worse and worse.” He gave me a firm look. “You only have two options here. Tell her or send her away. After a while, the ache will fade, and it will be as if you’d never met.”
“Sending her away isn’t an option,” I growled, a fierce protectiveness rising in me at the thought. She was mine, even if she didn’t know it yet.
