The kiss was slow, easy. Soft and tender. It drew her in and swept her under before she fully realized what was happening. A tenuous exclamation of pleasure moved free from the depths of her chest, and her arms encircled his neck in welcome. The gesture became an acceptance of his affection that she couldn’t deny.
Brody didn’t overstep or prolong the moment; he eased back by slow, tender degrees, concluding with a feather-soft brush of his fingertips against her cheeks and neck.
Fighting hard to remain composed—and lucid—Maria dug the house keys from her purse. She stepped from the vehicle covered by a delicious fog of happiness. Brody had already rounded the vehicle and unstrapped Lilly from the car seat. She opened her arms in a silent offer to take custody of her daughter, but Brody tucked Lilly close and shook his head. “That’s OK. I’ve got her.”
Maria tilted her head. “You know, you really don’t have to walk me to the door. It’s still broad daylight and everything.”
Brody grinned. “I’m a southern man. This is how I roll. C’mon.”
Would he kiss her again? Maria found herself wondering, and hoping, as she followed him along the path leading to the front door. She wrapped her arms tight against her body. She wasn’t cold; she wanted to capture the last sensation of his warmth, the last trace of his scent. Touching her tongue to her lips, she could still taste him. The flavor stirred an ache, a longing for more, for a connection not just of body, but of spirit. Brody Lang was a one-in-a-million man.
But so was Jake.
Lost in thought, she started when Brody pulled the keys from her fingertips and unlocked the door, pushing it open so she could cross the threshold. He paused before handing her Lilly. “See you at church tomorrow?”
That’s right. Church. The joy of singing, and glorifying God. It had been way too long since she had lost herself in worship. “Falls Tabernacle, right?”
“Ten o’clock.”
Maria nodded. “OK. Sounds good.”
He kissed Lilly on the crown of her head and then Maria took custody. Before turning toward his truck, Brody leaned forward. Warm, dewy lips captured hers one last time. Maria sighed from the inside out, dazzled all over again…in the span of time it took for her heart to beat.
He leaned back, his eyes sparkling and alive. “I’ll pick you up around nine thirty. Maybe we could have breakfast afterward.” He waited on her reply, which was a firm nod of agreement. “Today was a gift. There were moments when your guard came down completely. You let go, and you allowed yourself to relax and simply enjoy being with me and Lilly. You came alive, Maria. It was beautiful to see.”
For a few added seconds, he held her with his gaze, reaching deep with nothing more than a long, evocative look.
4
Brody tossed against the bedcovers, stirring to a wakefulness that was riddled by recollections and an intense longing. In dreams he had seen Maria’s sweet, smiling face and had come upon her subtle, flowery scent. Part of it was perfume; part of it was simply Maria herself.
Thanksgiving was just a few days away and he had been trying to figure out a way for the two of them—three, with Lilly—to spend at least part of the holiday together. He stretched and sighed, pondering what to do.
She seemed to enjoy services, because over the past couple weeks, at her request, they attended church together. Steady worship seemed to peel a layer of clouds away from her eyes. Another ray of light broke through when she found out she landed the job at Heart’s Haven. Andy and Vivian had celebrated the event last night by hosting an introductory get together at the recreation center so Maria could get to know some of the residents. With beguiling ease, she had won a number of friends and bloomed amidst the gathering. Brody had stayed close, loving the process of her reemergence as they laughed, snacked on homemade food, and enjoyed a few hours of relaxed socializing.
The evening was marred by just one moment of tension that threw Brody’s mind into turmoil. They stood in line at a table packed with food offerings. A woman just ahead of them made an innocent comment about how well-matched they seemed and asked how long they had been dating.
Maria shuffled, her fingertips working nervously against her plate of hors d'oeuvres. She smiled sweetly and explained what a fantastic friend Brody was and how grateful she was to have him in her life, but she dodged a direct answer. Afterward, she fell within herself. At the end of the night, when he walked her to her car, the issue rankled him enough that he wanted clarification. The party, so full of promise at the start, had nosedived for Brody. Did she mourn too deeply to let a new love into her life?
“You’re doing it again,” he murmured, walking her to her car, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his bomber jacket.
“What?” She unlocked the vehicle and turned to him, puzzled.
“Stepping away. Please—please stop it. Stop pulling back when you start to enjoy yourself. More specifically, stop pulling back when you find that you enjoy being with me.”
His tone was too sharp, and he knew it. He raked back his hair and spun away, stifling a growl of frustration. His muscles sang with tension and a need for this woman that he could hardly get his head around. Seconds drummed by.
“I’m sorry.” Her soft, sincere tone dissolved the hardness that had come upon him so quickly.
She fidgeted with the door handle for a second and then dipped her head. “This is about that woman, isn’t it? The one who asked how long we’ve been a couple?”
Brody nodded. “Yeah. The observation about us, the question, seemed to terrify you. Would that be such a bad thing? You and I?”
She lifted her head, and pleaded with her eyes. Brody’s shoulders slumped, and he blew out a breath, closing his eyes briefly while he attempted to regroup. “Gee. Who’s the impatient one now? Guess that would be me.” He faced her once more. “The bottom line is, I’ve come upon the most extraordinary woman I’ve ever met, and I’m afraid she’s not ready for everything I’d like to share with her and bring to her life.”
Maria maintained a silence interrupted only by her shallow, stuttering breath. He was getting to her. She was affected. But was it enough? Her eyes glittered. Such heaviness coated her spirit Brody’s heart swelled against a sharp ache. He braved a step closer. Then another. He reached out with unsteady fingertips and danced a soft caress against her wind-cooled cheek.
He continued. “Know what else?” She tilted her head, waiting, eyes inquiring. “From the first moment I met you, I’ve wanted just one thing. I’ve wanted to ease your sadness.” She tensed up. He waited, pointedly, until that tension slowly eased, and she physically accepted his words. “It covers you, Maria, and no one with as much faith, and love, as you possess should carry that kind of weight.”
Unwilling to give up completely, Brody had leaned down to place a slow, lingering kiss to her cheek, but more and more, he knew one thing to be certain. He wanted a relationship with Maria, something permanent and fulfilling, something committed. Would she accept such a thing? Was she anywhere near ready to accept his heart? How could he continue to battle the ghost of her husband?
Whipping back the comforter, Brody slipped out of bed, showered, and changed. He needed some trusted, objective advice. Building in an extra hour before he had to open the shop, he decided to pay a visit to Gabe and Susanna Peretti. He wanted to welcome his friends home from their honeymoon in Italy and see if Susanna might be willing to give a listen to his relationship turmoil over a cup of coffee and a slice of her famous banana nut bread.
Before long he stood on the front porch of the Peretti’s unit. He pressed the doorbell and found himself greeted promptly by Susanna.
“Brody! How are you?” Radiant with happiness and a boundless energy of soul, the casually dressed brunette offered him a tight hug. “You just missed Gabe. He had to report to the PD early today. He’s on the morning shift this week.”
“Sorry I missed Sergeant Peretti, but you’ll do in a pinch.” He gave her a wink. “Actually, I’m looking f
or counsel from a wise lady, and you came to mind instantly.”
Her lips quirked, and she pushed open the door so Brody could enter the foyer. “Charmer. Come on in. I just brewed some coffee.”
“I thought I smelled something delicious.” Brody followed her down a short hallway to the kitchen, admiring the way a cut-glass ceiling fixture threw illumination against the gleaming wood floor and placed a spotlight on the archway leading to a great room to his left. The unit really was a showplace. The aroma of coffee worked on his psyche like a welcome mat, so he gave an appreciative hum as he sat on a tall stool at the granite topped breakfast nook. While Susanna poured, Brody took in the dark wood cabinets stationed in a tidy row above stainless appliances and a large sink. Andy Hart cut no corners whatsoever when it came to the apartment complex that bore his imprint. Brody’s unit was a bit smaller than the Peretti’s—a one bedroom apartment versus two—but it featured the same style and layout.
“Would you like a muffin or a slice of banana nut bread?”
Brody grinned at Susanna’s question. “I was hoping your breakfast specialty would be on the menu.”
“Banana nut bread it is. So fill me in on what’s new. Judging by what I saw at last night’s party, it seems you and Maria Wilde have become close friends.”
Brody shifted restlessly. That was becoming an understatement, to be sure. “Leave it to a gifted psychologist to cut straight to the heart of things.”
Susanna carried a service tray which she settled on the counter. She claimed the stool next to his. “What can I say? It’s a job hazard. Catch me up, and leave nothing out.”
Brody released a rumbling chuckle. “Well, me and Maria. Let’s just say things started out simple, but simple turned complicated real quick. When we met, she came to my shop needing some help. I figured I’d be of assistance to a woman in need.”
“And now?”
“Now it’s more. A whole lot more.”
Susanna’s brows furrowed for an instant as she focused on him. “After watching the two of you together last night, I kind of figured that might be the case.”
From there, Brody took his friend on a journey through the past few weeks. At the conclusion, Susanna folded her hands beneath her chin and speared him with a direct look. “I don’t want to become psychoanalytical about this or anything, but it sounds to me like Maria is dealing with a level of survivor’s guilt that she’s still working through. Additionally, Jacob was her high school sweetheart, most likely her one-and-only love, the man she had never imagined being without. At least, not as a twenty-something new mother.”
Brody wished he could disagree, but Susanna’s words hit at the crux of the matter. “I feel the same way. Jacob is a stumbling block between us that I’m not sure she’s ready to step over yet. It’s tough competing with him to be honest. He was loving and devoted. Were he still alive, I think Jacob Wilde is the kind of person I would have been friends with.”
Susanna shot him another pointed look. “And therein is your answer, Brody.”
He shrugged broadly, lost, staring at his friend across their empty plates and cooling coffee cups.
Susanna continued. “He’s not here any longer. He isn’t, nor should he continue to be, the reality of her heart. Give it time. She’s probably coming to realize that fact, especially when she’s faced with the romantic intentions of a man as terrific as you.”
Brody harrumphed and his skin went warm, but Susanna’s words settled into a silence that zapped his perspectives about Maria and helped refine his emotions.
Susanna concluded. “Like I said, I noticed the two of you last night. When she looks at you, she lights up from the inside. I repeat, give her some time. It’ll be worth the battle.”
“I hope you’re right, Sus. I don’t want either one of us to get hurt.”
****
By increasing degrees, being around Brody Lang left Maria nervous. Self-aware. Tingly.
She hated tingly. She wanted nothing to do with the melting flush that ran like an elevator through her body when he stood at her side, touched her arm, twined his fingers through hers wearing a meant-for-you-alone smile.
And what a smile. A smile from Brody Lang tended to stop Maria in her tracks.
There was nothing overt in the way he paid attention to her. There were no aggressive, male-to-female advances to refute. Nothing rode that entwining curve between them but his gentle spirit, his goodness and charm. Brody was one of the good guys, someone who slipped into the seeking parts of a person’s heart and took hold before you even knew what hit.
That’s what disturbed her the most. That’s what pricked at her nerve endings. That’s what she couldn’t deny—no matter how hard she tried.
The day before Thanksgiving, Maria stood sentinel at the long counter in her parents’ kitchen, an all-out food prep bonanza in full swing. Aaron and Gillian O’Hara didn’t have a large family, but long-time friends, coupled with Maria’s return to the area with their precious grandbaby, fostered an air of celebration that carried through the house like the aroma of simmering food.
Maria wondered what Brody would be up to tomorrow…
“I went to church this past Sunday. At Falls Tabernacle.” Maria’s tumbling words were directed to her mother who stood nearby, pouring meat broth into a sauce pan for gravy. Maria needed to talk about Brody. She needed to take the temperature of someone close to her and gauge reaction on this rapidly intensifying relationship.
“Good for you. I’m glad to hear it. You could have come to worship with me and Dad if it would have made things easier. That way you wouldn’t have been alone.”
Oh, boy, Maria thought. Here I go. “Thanks, but I wasn’t alone, so don’t worry about it. And this was my third time.” Maria gave a light laugh. “You might say I’m becoming old hat.”
“I think that’s wonderful.” Maria’s mom pulled corn starch from the pantry next to the stove. She measured out several tablespoons and added them to the gravy mix.
“I went with—with a person I met at Heart’s Haven.” Maria greased a pie tin, settling the crust dough gently into position so she could begin the molding process.
“A person.” Mom whisked, her focus on the simmering liquid.
“OK, a guy. Believe it or not, it was Brody Lang.”
“Oh, the mechanic you talked about when you first arrived? He lives at the complex where you’re working?”
“Mmm-hmm. Small world, huh?”
“Something like that.”
Her mom looked way too pleased, and her satisfied tone of voice set Maria further on edge. Maria went silent and began to carefully press the dough into place instead of developing their conversation.
“So, tell me about it, honey. Talk to me. You’ve never been afraid to open up.”
Maria realized her mother had turned down the heat beneath the sauce pan and stopped working so she could pay close attention to what Maria had to say. Regardless of that gentle summons, the reality of being open heaped guilt on top of Maria’s wistful spirit. A need to be revealed won the moment, however, and Maria decided to keep facing her emotions.
“He makes me…I don’t know…”
Mom waited and watched; her posture was keen—almost challenging.
Maria floundered. “He makes me feel weird…kind of self-conscious. I’m…uncomfortable around him in a way, and…and I don’t want to feel…you know…”
The words drifted to silence and all at once Maria’s mom transformed into a guardian and lioness with nothing more than a sharpened glance, narrowed eyes and a furrowed brow. “Why is that, honey? Has he been inappropriate?”
The very idea caused Maria to laugh deep. “No. No, no, no. Nothing like that at all.” There it came, right on cue, the rising tide of heat that lifted from her toes to her chest, to her cheeks. “In fact, it’s just the opposite. That’s my point. That’s what’s tripping me up. I don’t want or need these kinds of feelings to creep up on me and skew the life I’m trying to r
ebuild. I need to stay settled and on-course—for Lilly’s sake.”
“I see.”
Maria snapped to, staring at her mom. “What?”
“The issue is he makes you aware, and he makes you feel good.” She shrugged. “I get it now. Furthermore, your intentions regarding Lilly are admirable, but what about you, Maria? What about your life over and above your daughter?”
Maria clucked her tongue and huffed, spinning away from direct confrontation so she could finish molding the piecrust. Meanwhile, she heard her mother chuckle. Maria scowled. “What’s funny?”
“You. You’ve been doing that ever since you were a little girl.”
“What?”
“Whenever someone hits a nerve, you sigh, roll your eyes, and turn away. Classic avoidance technique, so it kind of tips your hand.”
The reprimand was so loving and gentle, Maria couldn’t stifle a laugh. “Right.”
“It’s true.” Maria’s mom swiped her hands against the front of the apron she wore, the one with blue and white dots that had been a fixture in the O’Hara kitchen since Maria’s youth. “Looks like you’re about ready for the apples. Grab them from the fridge, and we’ll get to work slicing.”
Confront yourself, Maria thought. Confront what’s happening with Brody.
Do so and you’ll find Me, Maria. Find My love and promise in all that’s new, and good.
God’s calm, stilling voice turned the tide. Maria wiped her hands on a cloth and retrieved the fruit along with a cutting board. She started to peel and core while her mom prepped a large bowl with sugar, flour, and cinnamon.
“The thing is I guess I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed being touched and cared for. I didn’t want love. I wasn’t looking for another man or this kind of feeling. But the instant he took my hand in his, as soon as he prayed with me—which was the first thing we ever did together—it’s like I can’t escape him. I wish I could.”
“Why try to escape something that brings you joy?”
Maria's Angel Page 5
