by A. J. Jacobs
“Greetings from Idiot America” (Esquire)
guides, see spiritual advisory board
guilt:
about disadvantaged ancient, Israelites
about disobeying traffic rules
about eating eggs
about fate of ritual chickens
about honoring parents
about inadvertently pilfered exgirlfriend’s Bible
Jewish, in general
about lying to Mr. Berkowitz
about lying to the Falwell folks
about neighbor Nancy
about pestering pigeons
about righteous idiocy
about the slave/intern
about tefillinless binding
about transgressions when biblical year ended
Hackman, Gene, earth conceded to be older than
hair, hairstyles
function of side locks in
of Israelite vs. the pagan cut
olive oil dabbed on
Paul’s decree on length of
Halloween, off-limits paganism of
Ham, Ken
AJ trumped on science knowledge by
Ham (son of Noah), filial disrespect of
Hammurabi, code of
Handbook of Bible Law, A (Weisman)
subtitle of (says it all)
hand chopping:
biblical acceptance of
in self-defense
handshaking, bacteria-ridden custom of
Handy Seat, urban impurities avoided with
Hanukkah
harp of ten strings
one designed by ex-uncle
strolling the Upper West Side with
underground devotion to
Harris, Robbie
on avoiding idolatry
on literal meaning vs. rabbinical, interpretation of Bible
Harris, Sam
Harrison, Barbara (Julie’s mom)
AJ’s coveting spurred by
in negotiated photo shoot
Harrison, David (Julie’s stepdad), in Starbucks debate
Hasidic Jews
AJ’s fear that Jasper might, among many other things, join the above
dancing with
Lubavitcher sect of
pantheism of
wackjobs really the exception among
Hebrew alphabet, rough spots in learning of
Hebrew Bible (Old Testament)
AJ’s OCD and germaphobia dovetailed by
in Bible project
compassion vs. barbarism in
marriage and polygamy in
prosex parts of
Samaritan Bible vs.
slavery in
small variations seen in
troubled conception of promising offspring in
see also Torah; specific books
Hebrew calendar
hell, why Jehovah’s Witnesses are uncomfortable with concept of
“helmet,” origin and use of
Hendrix, Jimi
Hensley, George, father of Tennessee serpent handling
Heschel, Abraham Joshua, on the, Sabbath
Heston, Charlton
waters rolled back by
History of God, A (Armstrong)
Hitchens, Christopher
Holofernes, seduction and beheading of
Holon, Samaritans living in
Holy Land, AJ’s pilgrimage to
Home Depot, Noah seen as serious patron of
home-schooling movement
homosexuality:
as “abomination,”
in Cafeteria Christianity
capital punishment for
Christian view on
in critique of biblical literalism
evangelical stance on
homosexuality (cont.)
in evangelical study group
in God’s punishment for pagan, Gentile sins
religious right’s cultural view of
honesty, see truth telling
Hood, Ralph, on serpent handling
Hopper, Dennis
Hosea, Israelites’ idolatrous ways censured by
hospitality
of Abraham and the Middle East in general
Hubbard, Dean, on bride acquisition and red heifer projects
human beings:
convenient excuse for not touching 51 percent of
mucky origins linked to self-concepts of
Humanist Perspectives,
I Ate a Bug Club
ibn Ezra, Abraham, on how to think of a (married) pretty woman
idols, idolatry
apartment stripped of images verging on
destroying of
familial effects of
forty-five rules on
happy medium sought between
Amish and Taliban views on
in Protestant Reformation
in today’s cults of personality
impurity laws, female, see purity laws
impurity laws, male
incest
in the Lot family
penalty for
Incredible Mr. Limpet, The,
individualism, biblical group identity vs. European idea of
Inherit the Wind (movie), unfairness seen in
insects, deadly, in Revelation prophecy
insects, edible
as consumed willy-nilly in daily diet
sending for
survival in biblical times on
tasted
intelligent design, creationist dismissal of
Intercourse, Pa., moral victory on passing through
International Preschool
internet, intercessory prayer sprouting on
in vitro fertilization (IVF)
Bible noncommittal on
Julie’s eggs implanted
success of; see also twins, Jacobs
Tamar’s tale as parable of
Iraq
Jehovah’s Witnesses not found in
Nineveh now in
war in
Isaac
inexplicable near-sacrifice of
Rebecca as pretended sister of
Sarah’s late-life conception of
Isaiah:
on being called forth from the womb
on a cause of sleeplessness
on his hypocritical followers
on preaching good news to the poor
on walking naked and barefoot
Ishmael, as first circumcision subject
Islam:
images avoided by
Ishmael as forefather of
“Israel,” meaning of
Israel, modern:
AJ’s feelings on return from
forbidden fruit grown in
herding sheep in
persistent hospitality in
Samaritans dodging political raindrops in
security grilling before flight to
sojourn with ex-uncle in
some commandments observed only in
teenage AJ in family visit to
see also Jerusalem
Israelites, ancient
Christians who still believe in laws of
comparing the God of Spinoza, Tillich, and the Jedi knights with the God of
complex sacrifice rules of
entering mind-set of
explaining locust diet of
immortality achieved through descendants of
Jubilee law of
lost tribes of
menu marking of territory by
modern views on barbarism of
moral role of prophets among
oral laws passed on to, and eventually written
snail-made blue dye of
tithing system of
Yahweh as boss of all Gods known to
Ivan (friend)
Jackson, Jesse
Jackson, Michael
Jacob, AJ’s biblical alter ego:
attention-getting freakish look of
biblical words spoute
d by
byzantine payments to babysitter made by
in clash with secular AJ over, Rosario Dawson
end time for
ethnicity and piety observed in
in Ezekiel’s prophetic tradition AJ hopes
moral high ground occupied by
prudish tendencies of
referring to self in third person permissible for
on secular freaks who don’t get it
split personality of
strange behaviors seen in
thinking of earth age using mind of
“Thursday” avoided by
update on appearance of
Jacob (biblical)
Leah’s son’s dud mandrakes traded for a night with
problems with firstborn son of
thirteen offspring of
wives of
wrestles with God, is injured, and gets new name
Jacob and Esau story, debated meanings of
Jacobs, A. J.:
abstemiousness asked of
agnosticism of
anticircumcisionist reportage of
beard of, see beard
Bible translation issues met by
biblical alter ego of, see Jacob, AJ’s biblical alter ego
biblical library tidily classified by
biblical seder conducted by
at birth of twins
cherry picking forbidden fruit facts by
cold-turkey Sabbath observance of
Jacobs, A. J. (cont.)
daily coveting list of
dances with Hasidim
defoliation and return to old identity of
disappointing harp of
encyclopedia book of, see Know-It-All, The
ends-justify-the-means thinking vs. rule-following of
enumerated benefits in avoiding images by
evolving beard and visage of
excessive eye contact as unnerving habit of
failed cucumber farming of
Falwell singles group audited by
first prayer of
at gathering of godless
at gay Christian evangelical Bible study group
goat’s milk, honey, Mediterranean food in favored diet of
“God willing” often used in future-supplicative tense by
G-rated curse words of
G-rated sexual history of
gratefulness welcomed to other obsessions of
guilt feelings signaling Jewishness to
Israeli experience of
in kaparot ritual
libido stashed in deep freeze by
lighter, spiritual white wardrobe of
lingering stares drawn to exposed cash of
lust-proofing of apartment by
lying, complaining, gossiping, unwholesome talk denied to
as more biblical than thou
as “normal looking,”
as now a reverent agnostic
as officially Jewish
one and only rabid fan of
a partial list of times when he was right and Julie was not
photographed
pretending to be a better person as a good first step for
ram’s horn blown with modest success by
random facts still crowbarred into arguments by
self-censorship of
self-generated chukim practiced by
self-Googling habit of
sign of the cross made by college friend of
smashing idols felt urgently by
spiritual starting point of
in Starbucks meeting with delusional other self
sukkah built in living room by
Times Square’s Naked Cowboy out-gawked at by
trendy OCD and germaphobia of
tribal worldview of
various things tefillin might remind him of
weasel ex-roommate’s debt forgiven by
Jacobs, Arnold J., Sr.
AJ’s honoring of
literalism in practical joke of
mother’s memories of family seders read by
“no stealing” commandment followed to the letter by
self-control of
workaholism passed on to AJ from
Jacobs, Beryl
Jacobs, Ellen Kheel:
AJ’s honoring of
AJ’s near-teasing of
emailed jokes and wacky etymologies of
Sabbath solutions offered by
unexpected visit of
Jacobs, Jasper:
AJ on first-name basis with
AJ’s coveting on behalf of
at bat mitzvah with AJ and his altered state
Chicken Dance Elmo of
deceitful strategems of
denial of twins by
enviable swaddling of
medical traumas of
no more lies to
parents perceptively aped by
ratcheting up justice-to-mercy ratio for
remembering circumcision of
ritual chicken as epiphanic standin for
sibling sought for
tantrum style of
tithing’s impact on
uneven vocabulary of
in War of the Bowling Pin
worst disciplinarian needing help with
Jacobs, Julie Schoenberg:
AJ’s greed, lust, but some virtues exposed in honesty game of
AJ’s “Stuff” file revealed to
a biblical assist and an AJ high from
in birth of twins
capacity for magnitude five tremors of
commandments on doorpost scripture from
Dasani bottles filled with tap water by
defiantly negative speech of
demonstration of maturity by
as family disciplinarian
at fertility clinic
on first hearing of Bible Project
among Florida elderly
hardcore religion losing appeal to
on hearing an Amish joke
“helmet” as code word of
idiosyncratic sneeze of
idol worship allegedly practiced by
lashon hara attributed to
in late-stage pregnancy
living room sukkah construction dubiously inspected by
mother-son relationships as hopeful study of
movies phased out for
no chair left unsat on by
off-limits Dickinson sweatshirt of
playdate invitation trampled by spouse’s radical honesty
pregnancy quest of
purity laws not appreciated by
scavenger-hunt work of
spared AJ’s evil tongue during ride home
successful (in business) ex-boyfriend of
“sweet spots” marked on
s-word disconcertingly used by
on things happening for a reason
three-sons situation staring at
Jacobs, Lucas
Jacobs, Zane
as first twin to be circumcised
Jaguar, rabbinical views on coveting of
James, Epistle of, on how to talk about your next day
Jedi knights
Jefferson, Thomas
Jefferson Bible
“Jehovah,” as God’s real name
Jehovah’s Witnesses
eschewing cheap jokes about
Hebrew Scriptures leaned on by
highlights in belief system of
literalist argument for banning blood transfusion by
why major holidays and birthdays are not celebrated by
Jeremiah:
on our ability to change
questioned by the king
security grilling given to
walked around wearing a wooden yoke
on why men looked like they were bearing children
Jerusalem:
AJ just one of the messianic crowd in
bombings in
gay pride mar
ch in (2006)
interfaith street scene in
walking naked and barefoot in
why it’s the Galápagos Islands of religion
Jerusalem Bible
Jerusalem syndrome, baffling symptoms of
Jerusalem temples, era of:
purity laws dating from
rules relevant in
Jessica and Peter (friends), where God exists debated by
Jesus:
on almsgiving
as family man
following moral teachings without accepting divinity of
Last Supper of
literalist views on teachings of
marriage ideal in Genesis quoted by
on number of times to forgive your brother
observed walking on water
pacifism of
parables of
Pharisees denounced by
red-letter view of
righteous indignation of
ritual laws made obsolete by
serpent handler devotion to
tefillin worn by
traditional laws nullified by sacrifice of
world creation linked to gestation time of
on year of Jubilee
Jesus-fish-gobbling-Darwin-fish bumper sticker
Jewishness, test for authenticity of
Jewish Theological Seminary
Jews:
breaking stereotypes of
chosenness of
guilt as identity marker for
see also Judaism
Jews, Hasidic, see Hasidic Jews
Jews, Orthodox
guidelines in The Set Table followed by
monthly honeymoon sex enjoyed by
only visible bugs on forbidden list of
rigid modesty rules of
sculptures not made by
as strictest Sabbath keepers
structure for kids as goal of
tamer version of kaparot practiced by
tzitzit worn by
Jews, ultra-Orthodox
antigay demonstrations of
as eschatological allies of untrafundamentalist, Christians
four blue threads again tied to tassels by
kaparot practiced by
mandatory partying of
Job, Book of:
on the company of the godless
on the Lord’s giving and taking away
on making a covenant not to gaze lustfully at virgins
modern, agnostic view in
Joelle (great-aunt)
on God’s love
John, First Epistle of, on the little children of God
John, Gospel of:
on foot-washing ritual
on Jesus promising drink for the thirsty
on Jesus walking on the sea
on Samaritan kindness to Jesus
on taking “born again” literally
on truth as liberating
John (friend)
discussing impurity issues with
sharing edible crickets with
John the Baptist, survival diet of
jokes:
Amish
about circumcision
dirtiest ever, in The Aristocrats,
about five blondes in a bar
about Mel Gibson’s facial hair
obstetrical
