“Get out of here. Georgia, look out!” Oriel managed, grappling with The Alchemist’s spell keeping him on the edge of strangulation.
“What exactly do you think you’re doing, my dear?”
Oriel’s blood ran cold when Georgia smiled. Wide. Dazzling. Deadly. “Oh, didn’t you realize? While you were gloating and enjoying your little monologue, I’ve been figuring out how to travel through the shadows. And you know what?” She winked. “I think I got it.”
12
Georgia felt her body disappear, and when she opened her eyes a second time, she was outside the circle of shifters. They spun to stare at her, stopped mid-movement by The Alchemist’s hand rising. He stared at her, one of those I’m-not-quite-sure-what-to-say stares where he tried to figure out her motive.
“It’s easy because I don’t need to think about it,” she said, speaking of disappearing. Traveling through shadows. “It’s like breathing. Like living. If I let go, it comes naturally.”
“And what else are you thinking of letting go, my dear?” This time when he spoke, his voice was rough. Gritty.
“I’m thinking, if I let her go, then there’s no more alchemy. There’s no more potion,” she murmured, walking in a circle around the shade. She tried to push Oriel’s muffled strangulation noises to the back of her mind. If her roughshod idea worked, they would be out of here. Jasmine and Oriel. Her, on the other…
“But if I keep you here…if I keep you for myself. I’ll be able to live. I remember what it’s like to live. To do what you want to do. Be who you want to me.” Her voice turned wistful. “Why shouldn’t I have a chance to take back what was taken from me?”
“She’s not going to do it.” The Alchemist let out a laugh, tipping his head back in full enjoyment. “She doesn’t have what it takes.” A snap of his fingers had Oriel dropping to the ground on a cough.
He stared up with a powerful glower. “Don’t bet on it, asshole. She’s stronger than you think.”
“She won’t give up the opportunity to be normal. Not when everything I’ve done has led her here. To me. To this.”
And Georgia was pleased to see he sounded frightened. She must have had one foot outside the physical plane as well because she saw the lines of concentration on his face. He was trying to reach her, to keep her contained. It wasn’t working.
“It comes down to my survival or the shade. Doesn’t it?” she continued, staring ahead. Her gaze drawn to the shade. “One of us has to die so the other can live. Because what else is this torture than a slow death?”
“One shade so that millions can live,” The Alchemist reasoned. He pushed through the circle of shifters until he stood on the outside with her. “Don’t you see it has to be this way?”
“It’s not right. I don’t deserve this. My life can’t be derived from torture.”
“You would give up your chance to be in the spotlight. For this creature you don’t even know? Please don’t try to spin me a tale. You aren’t that good, Georgia.”
“You know, someone already tried that argument on me. It didn’t work then. It won’t work now.”
She closed her eyes, breathed in deep. Tried to think about anything other than her pain. The Alchemist was fast, true, and he would be expecting her to go for the shade again. The same way she’d done the first time. Or maybe he wouldn’t. Maybe he was already fifteen steps ahead of her and could anticipate the thousands of potential decisions she might make.
Instead, she decided to throw away the reigns. Let whatever was inside of her take control. She’d done a terrible job of it so far. No matter what she tried to do or where she tried to go, it was never correct. It was never good enough or right enough.
What was there left to do except the opposite?
She felt her body disintegrate. Only this time it was different. She was different. Her awareness, once centered in her own head, expanded outward. She knew where she was, the location of everyone else in the room. Their breath and their heartbeats. Time slowed around her and she drifted from shadow to shadow. Stopped to survey the room.
The Alchemist was frozen in a parody of a grin, his arms outstretched, mid-stride. He wasn’t faster than her now.
You’re here.
The voice echoed inside of her and all around. The shade. It was ethereal, cold, and although she no longer had possession of her physical body, she had the impression of ice crystals forming. There was agony there as well, yes, agony equal to or greater than what Georgia felt.
She responded that yes, she was there. What could she do? How could she do?
Merge with me.
It was a simple request. Simple and world ending.
What if I lose myself, she asked.
But what if you find yourself? the shade responded. You have no choice. Without you, we both perish.
It was a choice she had to make. If she went through with this, there was a good chance she would never come back. The shade’s sorrow penetrated through her, became her, and she realized there wasn’t a choice at all. Not really. Not when you pushed away the gray and took a hard look at the black and white.
Reaching out, she let go of the last of her ties to the physical plane. Let them slip away as she merged fully with the shadows. With the shade. Both females linked with each other and at once the hunger was back with such power, such strength, had Georgia still been human it might have killed her or brought her over the edge of madness. She pushed the agony to the side and focused on the magic. Raw magic unlike anything she’d felt before.
Even chained, the shade was a creature not of this world. Something The Alchemist, for all his knowledge, knew nothing about. He’d trapped her, yes, and held her contained for too many years. Once the chains were broken, then there would be hell to pay.
Guide me, Georgia demanded
Together the two of them worked, combining their strength into a singular unit. She felt herself slipping away under the weight of the shade’s power. The darkness calling to her. Tempting her to surrender. She cultivated a core of iron and sent the first wave of magic outward, striking at the chains. Repeatedly, the two worked the shade growing weaker under the vast amounts of energy they expanded.
Georgia mentally grit her teeth and dug in.
We can’t do this, the shade whispered.
No one tells me what I can and cannot do, Georgia repeated. She remembered the first audition she’d been to, where the casting director told her she needed to lose twenty pounds before he’d even consider her for a walk on roll. Beyond that, she remembered the first tie she’d told her mother and father of her dreams to become an actress. How they’d laughed at her and told her she was too big for herself and she needed to come down to earth. It would be easy to use the anger to her advantage. The anger and the frustration at all those years she’d spent doubting herself and her worth before finally crawling her way up to the top.
Then she thought about Oriel. The same sasquatch surfer who joked with her about her inability to handle an espresso machine. She remembered, and looking back she saw the kindness in his eyes, his utter belief in her and her goodness despite her nasty temper and foul mouth. The way he stood by her side despite their differences and the way he’d opened his home to her. The way he’d trusted her to stay with them, to not harm his sister, even when the hunger rode strong.
So instead of the fury she was accustomed to using as fuel or inspiration, she turned to the tiny mewling part of her she’d once thought weak. She turned to love.
And the last chain shattered.
At last.
Freed, the shade rose away from the binds keeping it contained, infinite darkness stretching across the room.
Georgia, used to looking with her human eyes, had a hard time focusing on the scene. She caught glimpses, flashes, of the terrified shifters running for the door. She saw The Alchemist with the smile wiped clean off his face, eyes rounded in horror. Before everything went black she saw Oriel crouched on the floor with his arms around Jasmine
, staring at her. Her.
Then the scene shifted and cleared until the room was colored in shades of back and gray. Sound disappeared and there was only Georgia and her breathe and her pain.
Hello? She called out, her arms at her sides. Can anyone hear me?
There was nothing around her. No one to hear her. She swung to her arms like they were swords, hoping to swipe something. Anything. She was alone in the room. Breath labored in her chest and she tried to run, found her feet sinking into the floor. Melting with the shadows there.
She was somewhere far away. Trapped in an in between. She struggled for release with fear building every beat of her heart. Blackness crept from nooks and crannies, getting closer. Closer.
Opening her mouth to scream, she flung out her arm one last time. Trust, something told her. But fear was greedy and would not release her readily.
This was where the shade had been trapped, she thought. Here in this nothingness where shadows were terrifying and there was no one to hear her cry.
But she had to trust. She had to try. Her hand slapped against flesh and with her next exhale, Oriel pulled her into the light.
“I thought I’d lost you.” He dragged her against his chest and held her there. For a moment she could hardly move, hardly feel. Then slowly her arms came around his barrel of a chest and she clung to him.
When she spoke, her voice was hardly above a whisper. “You found me.”
“Of course I did. I’ll always find you.” His lips met the top of her head. “I don’t care where you go, I’ll find you.”
“How did you know where I was?”
“I didn’t. I just reached out and there you were. Some things, my darling, we’re not meant to understand. But I’m glad you came back to me. You tried to sacrifice yourself.”
Georgia opened her mouth to respond when Jasmine lunged at her and would have knocked them both over had it not been for Oriel. “Don’t you dare do anything like that again,” she said, the sound muffled against Georgia’s shirt. “Okay?”
“Believe me, I don’t want to.”
“Where did you go?” Jasmine wanted to know
“I wish I knew. I never want to go there again.”
“Don’t worry. From now on, I’m not going to let you out of my sight.”
“I thought you were mad at me?” she soothed, running a hand down the younger girl’s hair.
“I am. But I’d rather be mad at you here than lose you. We never got a chance to talk about it. I can’t let you go.”
“I think you mean you can’t give up the argument.”
“No, honey, no. It’s you I can’t give up.”
“Don’t start being nice to me now. Not when I’m going to die.”
“Yeah, about that…” Oriel had his arm around her shoulders, guiding both of them toward the door. She averted her gaze to ignore the piles of ash. What was left of The Alchemist and his bear shifter posse. “I may or may not have found the rest of the stash.”
“What stash?”
“The nullum fame.”
Jasmine reached out to slap him. “Jerk. I’m the one who found it.”
“Okay, Jas found it. There’s enough, if you want, to keep you for the rest of your life.”
Georgia pulled up short. “You can’t do that. No, Oriel, you can’t! What about your business? This is what you wanted, to help people, and if you give it all to me.”
He stilled her frantic movements by placing his hands over hers. “Hush. You made a sacrifice back there. Let me do the same for you. Because if I can’t help the people I love, then I’m not much use, am I?”
“You guys are going to make me sick.” Jasmine blew a raspberry and turned away.
“You’d do it for me?” Georgia couldn’t tear her eyes away from Oriel.
“I would do anything for you. And we can argue about it later, all right? I’m ready to go home, take a shower, and sleep for the next year.”
* * *
“You ready?” Oriel held out a hand for her. His arm steady.
Georgia flashed him a ready and easy smile. “I’m the one who should be asking you. This is much more my scene than yours. Are you sure you’re comfortable in your penguin suit?” She caught his fingers and let him drag her close. Then, noticing a bit of lint on his shoulders, broke his hold to brush it off. Straighten the fit of the jacket and adjust his bowtie.
“I think I can manage for a night. After all, this is for you.” He stared straight ahead and tried his best to look comfortable, really he did.
“For us,” she corrected. “You know I wouldn’t make you do this if it weren’t important. Will the shop be okay?”
“Hilary has the reigns. If there are problems, she knows she can call someone else. Tonight, we are completely off the grid.”
She finished fixing his suit and slid her hand down to lace her fingers through his. She liked the we statement. It sounded good. Had a certain ring to it. And damn if Oriel didn’t look like he’d been born in the suit. It fit his frame perfectly and brought out the strong lines of his face and jaw.
Damn. This sexy man was hers? What had she possibly done to deserve him?
Oriel stepped back to stare at her. “What? Did I do something wrong?”
“No,” she said with a soft chuckle. “You’ve done everything right. I just can’t stop staring at you. You are a handsome man.”
He shifted from foot to foot like he was uncomfortable with the compliment. “I’m not used to dressing like this.”
“And yet you pull it off well.”
This time, when she smiled, it reached her eyes. They were back home, the three of them, with the last of the nullum in their possession. Better yet, they were alive. In one piece. And forever changed.
“This isn’t what I expected,” she admitted. “A social soiree for the supernatural.”
Oriel chuckled and the sound rumbled low in his chest. “Try saying it ten times fast.”
She did it twice more for effect before she became tongue-tied and ended on her own giggle. “Okay, you win. I can’t do it. I’m out of practice.”
“It’s fine. I know a few other activities to help you win back some dexterity there.”
She blushed at the dark undertones in his voice, a shiver beginning in her belly and working its way down. “Stop,” she said, slapping him lightly on the chest. She’d have better luck trying to move a mountain with her bare hands. “I don’t want to be distracted tonight. I have to be on my best behavior.”
He straightened and sighed, schooling his face into a paragon of virtue. “Of course. I wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardize you. Although you are incorrigible.”
Georgia turned to the mirror and stared at her reflection in the bright overhead lights. She’d gotten better at controlling her powers. Her gifts. Better to think of them as a gift than a curse, because she finally understood it was all in her hands. She didn’t have to disappear entirely unless she wanted to. She didn’t have to be anything other than what she was.
Tonight, she wanted to be present. More, she wanted to shine.
Oriel bent down to place a kiss on the exposed skin near her shoulder. “You look beautiful. Stop fussing.”
She opened her mouth to retort when the door burst open and there was Jasmine, her hair a wild riot of curls around her face. “God, are you two ready yet? I’m about to burst out of my skin here.”
“Not literally, I’d hope,” Oriel responded dryly. He let his arm drop around Georgia’s shoulder.
“This is the first major party you’ve ever let me go to.” Jasmine indulged in a hop of excitement, hands in the air. “I could just die.”
“Please don’t do that either.”
“How does my hair look? Is it okay? Georgia, you have to help me! Is my dress on point? Makeup on fleek?”
Georgia shook her head. “You’re fine. This really isn’t a big deal. And I don’t know what fleek means.”
Jasmine scoffed. “Sure, compared to the glitz
and glam you’re used to. To me it’s huge.” She ended her sentence with a whisper instead of a bang.
“It’s a fundraiser and a small acknowledgment for us taking down the rogue bear shifters. Stop worrying so much.” Her own stomach belied the statement and gave an ominous grumble. She slapped a hand across it to get it to shut up.
There was no reason to feel nervous. None at all. Jasmine was right. Considering the affairs she was used to, this would be a breeze.
It was also the first official party she’d graced since she died.
Which might have something to do with her nerves.
In answer to her unspoken stress, Oriel grabbed her shawl from the bed and draped it across her back. “Everything is going to be fine. It’s not like you have to give the speech.”
“My humanitarian,” she answered dryly. “The only reason we got invited.”
He leaned in close. “They wanted to see you shine, too.”
Life was very different for her now. A huge change from anything she’d expected for herself.
“You know, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay you for what you’ve done for me.” She stood on her tiptoes and offered him a kiss, delighted when he bent to place his lips on hers. She nibbled slightly, drawing him in, drawing him deeper. “You gave up everything for me.”
They’d gotten the last vials of nullum fame, the last vials in existence. Instead of keeping them to himself for his business, Oriel gave them to her. She’d tried to push them away. To tell him she wasn’t worth the sacrifice. He hadn’t listened. Typical stubbornness.
“I assure you,” he whispered against her mouth, “you are worth it. It was no sacrifice.”
She smiled against him. “How are you reading my mind?”
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