by Lauren Wood
“You’ve never asked me to be a couple. You’ve had sex with me 2 times now, after which you’ve never professed your love to me. If you don’t love me anymore just tell me. If this is simply something we are going to do for sex, I guess I’ll be fine with it.” Sally admitted.
“I don’t know what I want from you anymore. I would have jumped at marrying you before, but now I don’t know.” Johnny admitted.
Sally stood there shocked. “How did your feelings for me change?” She asked.
“I’m mad at you for leaving me. I can’t help it, I’ve tried to control it, but it just always wells up inside of me. I did hurt some people since you’ve been gone too. I’m not going to lie to you; I wanted to hurt you when we had sex before too. I could have easily squeezed your neck until you passed out, and I’m worried that I might. You’ve made me so mad.” He stated.
“You would hurt me?” She asked.
“I don’t know, sometimes I’m so mad at you for going to Paris and then sleeping with someone. But how can I be mad when I did the same thing here? Sally it’s really confusing to me. I love you but there is a part of me that hates you too.” He said.
She covered her mouth. “I don’t know what to say. I never met to make you hate me. I’ve always thought it was sweet how you liked me so much. But I could never imagine you feeling any other way but loving me. I’m so sorry Johnny; I didn’t mean to do it.” Sally said and a tear dropped from her eyes.
He saw her crying and walked over to her. “I’m sorry Sally. I really do love you; I hate to see you crying. But I’m not good for you anymore. I think I would only make people look down at you. They all see me as a rapist and nothing more.” He looked into her eyes. “I can’t tie you to me and ruin your life too.”
“It’s not your choice Johnny, it’s mine. If I want to be with you I should be able too. I don’t care what everyone else says in town.” She stated.
In her mind a plan was formulating to finding out the truth from Mary and getting her to tell it during the trial. If he was cleared surely their lives together wouldn’t be bad. Or they could move she began to think of many plans at once.
“You may after a bit, and I don’t know what I would do if I lost you again.” He said his voice serious and a bit scary.
Sally moved closer to him and rubbed her head on his chest. “Can we make love again?” She asked, trying to put all thoughts out of her head. She didn’t want to think about him pleasing anyone else but her.
He picked her up and she was shocked. “You’ve really been working out a lot since I left.” She purred.
“Yes I have. I wanted to be a man you would desire.” He stated.
Sally knew that it was wrong that he had changed so much for him, but she really did like this new bad boy. Johnny had always been such a little wimpy type of boy, now he could easily pick her up and carry her into his room. He threw her on the bed and pounced on her.
Their clothes were off immediately as he showed her again how much he had missed her. She didn’t think she would ever tire of this.
“Did you have fun with those girls?” She asked in the middle of their love making.
“This isn’t the right time to talk about that.” He stated.
“I just want to know, if you liked fucking them as much as you do me?” She pushed.
“No, it’s not the same. I just did it for fun, not because I loved them. It isn’t like it is with you. I orgasm much stronger when I’m with you, and I want to taste every part of your body.” He growled and tossed her on her back.
Sally couldn’t think as he probed her lower regions in many various and delicious ways. She grabbed onto his hair and pulled it as her body squirmed under his manipulation of it. “Oh Johnny!” She screamed loudly.
She couldn’t help it she knew she was in love with him. Even if she had never seen him that way before, the person he was right now had captured her heart. Sally wanted him to make love to her for the rest of her life. If only he would come around and figure out that she wouldn’t leave him again.
They lay tangled together later and she sighed. “That was wonderful.” She smiled and closed her eyes.
“It was perfect.” He stated.
Her mind floated in her dreams. She pictured herself confronting Mary and finding out the true story. Sally wanted to plead with Mary that she should tell the truth.
Chapter 2
Johnny had visited his attorney and wasn’t in the best of moods. But Sally still wanted to talk. He had been honest with her. The night had been Mary’s idea and he had gone along with it. Now he wished he hadn’t, and it didn’t look good for him.
Mary wasn’t budging from her lie, and the other girls were along with her to the end. At least that was what his attorney had stated. “I don’t know we might have to plea bargain this one out. If we go to trial they might sentence you for 20 years or more.”
“But I didn’t do it, why should I even serve one day?” He questioned.
“Look your past few months have been tough. You’ve been arrested and charged with assault. Even though Denton dropped the charges it still shows there. That doesn’t look good at all. It isn’t hard for people to imagine that you might be a bit of a loose cannon.” The attorney explained.
“Fuck this is bullshit. How much time do you think you can get it plea bargained down too?” Johnny asked.
“I don’t know, I was hoping for maybe a year or two. But I might just be dreaming. I might be able to get the DA to agree to it.” He said.
“Let me think about it okay. The last thing I really want to do is go to jail after Sally just got home. Fuck she’d leave me, I’m sure of it.” Johnny had answered.
The whole drive home he had imagined it, her leaving him again. He really thought it might send him over the edge. He could see his anger spilling over and beating the life out of someone. It wasn’t hard to imagine lately, with all the anger he had inside.
He had hoped that once she was back he would feel better. Had wished it, but he had discovered that he didn’t trust her fully. Johnny was just waiting for her to turn her back on him and say she was moving somewhere else.
When she had asked him about that night he hadn’t wanted to discuss it. But he knew at least she would hear the truth from him. Anyone else would tell her the lies that had been weaved by the girls and Mary.
Johnny looked at her now as she slept in his arms. “I don’t deserve her anymore. I’ve made too many mistakes and she’s going to pay for them too.” He shook his head. If they weren’t at his house he might just get up and leave and never come back.
But he had to admit that he would never be able to stay away from her for long. If he had to go to jail, it would kill him being away from her. He had felt like he won the lottery when he had seen her back in town. Johnny hadn’t believed his eyes at first.
Then when she had turned around and he could see she was crying, he had felt like a heel for everything he’d done since she was gone. He felt bad for having sex with Mary, for trying to hurt Sally, and so many other things. But deep in his mind he knew that she had been the cause of it all.
However, he loved her and was in a fight with himself about what was the best thing to do. “You know the best thing is to leave her and let her be with someone who isn’t thought to be a rapist.” He murmured under his breath.
“I can’t though, she makes me feel better. I love her.” He thought to himself. Why isn’t life fair, why did she have to leave in the first place? If she would have just stayed, none of this would have ever happened.
Eventually Johnny fell asleep as well, his mind stopping just long enough for it to take over. In his dreams he pictured a sentence of 5 years being handed down in court. He looked at his attorney a question in his mind and he asked. “I thought you said one or two years, how did it change to 5?”
His attorney looked at him and said. “It was the best I could do I’m sorry. You’re lucky it’s not longer.”
He turn
ed to see Sally sitting in the court room and her face was hard. He tried to talk to her, but she ignored him and turned her back. Johnny watched in the dream as she walked out without looking back at him once.
When he woke up he felt horrible, he wondered if it was a prophecy of what would happen. Not that he had ever believed in anything like that in the past. But the fear of her turning her back on him was real. He could feel the fear through to his every bone.
He felt her moving and she looked up at him and kissed him. Her hand roamed down his body and felt the new muscles that he had gotten in the past month. Then she stopped and focused on one muscle that was already reacting to her touch.
“We shouldn’t do it again.” He pulled away.
“Why not?” She questioned.
“What if I go to jail? Will you wait around for me?” He asked.
Sally looked at him. “How long will you go for?” She asked, and then stopped him from answering. “I’ll wait.” She answered.
“I might be in for up to 20 years if it goes to trial. But my attorney thinks I should go for a plea bargain and I’ll serve less time.” He told her.
“20 years, that’s a long time.” Sally said and realized that she wasn’t sure if she could wait for him that long. “I’ll wait for you though.” She finally said again.
He looked at her cautiously. “You don’t sound too confident about that. I’m telling you it would be better if you just leave now and never look back.” Johnny told her.
“No I don’t want that. I want you.” She murmured and kissed him deeply.
Johnny didn’t stop her this time, he made love to her. Even if he wasn’t sure if she would stay, at least he could enjoy her while she was with him. He looked down at her and said, “I love you Sally, but I really think you’re making a mistake being with me.”
“Johnny Young all these years you’ve been proclaiming to me how much you love me, and now you’re telling me its wrong. I don’t think so; I think I’ve just finally realized the truth.” Sally said.
“Remember this when people start saying stuff to you in town, because they will. I get looks all the time now, and they aren’t nice ones.” Johnny commented.
“Johnny Young I love you and that’s all there is to it. I’m behind you 100 percent of the way.” Sally commented.
“Sally why did I have to change for you to love me though?” He asked.
“I think you’re still the same boy deep down, you’ve just changed on the surface.” She stated.
“I don’t feel like the same person.” He admitted.
“But you are.” She kissed him.
He only wished it was that simple, but he knew she wasn’t looking at the full picture. Only time would tell if she was being completely honest with him or not.
Chapter 3
Sally decided she had to go back and get at least one of her jobs back now that she was back. She hoped that they would at least give her part-time to begin with. She also wanted to be able to spend time with Johnny, so full-time wasn’t something she wanted. Just in case he really did have to go to jail on these false charges.
Another thing she wanted to do was to go and see Mary. It was bad enough Mary had said the things to Sally that she had when they had talked when she was in Paris. But now Mary was lying about a man that Sally wouldn’t mind spending the rest of her life with.
She had thought about it overnight and had decided that she would stay beside Johnny, even if he went to jail for a lot of years. It would only be right on her part, and she had to admit she had learned to love him even more than just the bad boy image he had created.
Sally was still shocked when she thought about that kind of love he must have to change himself completely. Well not completely, she could still see a lot of his old self underneath the outside layer. But even she would admit that there were just slight glimpses of that person now. Some of her missed that old Johnny, but not enough to say anything to him.
“Now onto the job search, I’ll call my old jobs now.” She was saying to her mom.
“I really wish you would consider this relationship you have with Johnny.” Her mom began to lecture. She had heard it many times since she’d been back. But like all the other times, she stopped her mom quickly.
“Look mom, I know what you think. But you only know one side of the story. If you wouldn’t automatically jump to conclusions like everyone else, you might just see that. You’ve known him for the last 10 years now; do you really think he could be that person they say he is?” Sally questioned her mom.
“You didn’t see old man Denton after Johnny beat him. If you would have you wouldn’t be so sure about him anymore either. If that wouldn’t have happened and it was just the girls, maybe I would still believe him. But honestly I think I would still have doubts. He was different right after you left. He wasn’t the same little happy boy that I remembered seeing so many times in the past.” Her mother explained.
“How could someone change that much though?” Sally asked.
“I don’t know Sally, but you know that I wouldn’t lie to you. He was no longer the boy who was over here every day and making googol eyes at you. I’m not really sure how to explain it. He stopped saying hi to us; he never came over to ask about you or anything. He was out all hours of the night, and would often come home and be loud and drunk. I just wish I could be sure that you were safe with him. That’s all I want is for you to be safe and happy.” Her mother stated.
“Mom, he wouldn’t hurt me I’m sure of it. Plus I am happy, really happy for the first time in a long while. I don’t even mind being in Kearney anymore, not like I used to be. Sure a lot of that has to do with my bad experience in Paris, but thanks to him I’m happy here. So don’t worry about me mom, and please stop lecturing me on my choice of men.” Sally said.
“Fine honey, I’ll do that. I just hope you are making the right choice. You know a lot of people here are talking about him. If you are with him, they will think badly of you too. It may not be right, but they will.” Her mother said.
“Its okay mom, I’ll be fine.” Sally responded and picked up the phone to start making phone calls.
“Hello Mr. Samuels it’s Sally Leach. Yes I’m back in town. I was wondering if you had an opening still, anything, part-time would be great. Sure I can stop by later today, say 5:00? Okay great I’ll see you then.” Sally hung up the phone.
“Well that will be nice, I know their system and he said he’s only hiring part-time for now.” Sally told her mom.
“Great sweetie. Just remember this town gossips. That’s all I’ll say, but I hope I’m wrong about these things.” Her mother said.
“Mr. Samuels has known me for years; he won’t be like that even if he’s heard anything.” Sally commented.
“Everyone has heard about this in town, it’s the story of the year. It really doesn’t look good for Johnny. Are you sure you’re ready to see him go to jail? I would imagine it would be hard on you, and him.” Her mom questioned.
“Johnny and I talked about this already and yes I am ready. Aren’t you supposed to stand beside the one you love, even in times of trouble?” Sally asked.
“Yes sweetie this is true. But I don’t know if they were using it this way. If he’s in jail, oh I don’t know honey. Do what you feel is best, I just hope for you to be happy.” Her mom said.
“I know mom. Hey I’m going to go out and shop a bit. I have some extra money since I didn’t stay in Paris long. Oh I’m also going to give you and dad the money back, well most of it. I’ll pay the rest back as I get paid from work.” Sally stated.
“Oh honey you don’t have too.” Her mom commented.
“I want too though.” Sally said. “I’ll be back in a little bit.” She said and headed out to go to the mall.
At the mall she ran into a few people she knew who were shocked to see her back.
“Hey Sally, I thought you want to Paris?” Tom asked he had been a friend in high school.
; “I came back early, it just wasn’t what I expected it to be.” Sally told him and the other friend who was with him.
“Oh hey did you hear about your neighbor?” Tom questioned.
Sally decided to play dumb and see what they would say. “No, what about him?”
“He is a psycho, they say he raped 10 girls, one of them was Mary. He beat up old man Denton, and a few other guys at the Southside bar. I don’t know he used to seem pretty normal in school. But that’s what they say about the quiet one’s they are the ones you watch out for.” Tom shook his head as he talked. His mind had obviously been made up about Johnny’s guilt already.
“I don’t know about that, he isn’t the type of guy who would do those things. I’ve known him far too long, I don’t believe it.” Sally commented.
“Yeah that’s just because the guy always had the hots for you.” The other guy who was standing with Tom commented. Sally couldn’t even remember his name, but she looked at him with a glare that shut him up quickly.
“No I’m not saying it because of that.” Sally stated. “I just don’t think he would be capable of those things.”
“Well you were gone, so you didn’t see it all happen. It would have been different if you were here. Then you wouldn’t be so quick to defend him. Jack Denton is my cousin and I saw his dad after Johnny beat him. He had to be in the hospital for almost a month because of it.” The other boy said to her.
“I don’t know, I guess it’s possible.” Sally gave up trying to convince them that Johnny was innocent. Honestly, she did know he had beaten old man Denton, Johnny admitted that, but he hadn’t said how badly.
She had to wonder again about how honest Johnny was being with her. He seemed to be hiding some things from her, but it could just be the doubt that other people were putting in her mind too. She wanted to believe in him. But what could you believe about someone who you seemed to know so little?
