by Jane Porter
“No.” She gritted. “You’re right. I wanted more than that. I wanted love. I wanted you. I wanted forever.”
“And now you have it.” And his head came down, his mouth taking hers in a hard, punishing kiss.
He kissed her until she clung to him, unable to stand without his support. He kissed her until she was dazed and breathless and unable to argue.
“You have it,” he repeated. “My wife.”
Chapter Eleven
‡
Wife?
She blinked at him, still dazed, and very confused. “What did you say?”
“Wife.” The corner of his mouth lifted. “You’re my wife, Ava. We’re already married. We’ve been married since last Thanksgiving.”
“That’s not true.”
He pulled Ava from the breezy deck, through doors, into a pretty sitting room. “It most certainly is. For richer or poorer, in sickness and in health,” he said.
She sank into the nearest chair, her legs no longer able to support her. “I don’t believe you.”
Colm drew a slim leather wallet from his pocket and opened it to show her a photo he kept next to his driver’s license.
It was a picture of a bride and groom and the groom was holding a toddler in a black suit. “This is us fourteen months ago. This is our family. You, me, and Jack, on the day of our wedding.”
Ava studied the photo intently. Handsome Colm in a tuxedo. Baby Jack in an almost identical suit. And her in a white, formfitting gown. She was holding flowers. She was smiling. They were all smiling.
She looked up at Colm. “I see the picture but I don’t remember.”
“The point is, we are married already. We are a family. Jack has a family. It’s time we moved forward, not back.”
She couldn’t tear her gaze from the photo. “Why don’t I remember?”
“You took Jack out in his stroller four days after the ceremony. You left him there and walked away. By the time the police found you, you didn’t remember any of it. The doctors thought you might regain some of your memories if given time, and I think you did regain many memories, but you never regained all.”
“And you’ve been waiting all these months for me to remember?”
“You’re my wife, Ava. I will wait the rest of my life for you. But what about Jack? Is it right, or fair, to make him wait?”
Her heart thumped. She felt wild on the inside but she couldn’t lose it. She had to stay calm, because Colm was right. Jack deserved more. Jack deserved better. “So how do we do this? What happens now?”
“We get our son and we bring him home.”
*
They reached Lorient Bay just before noon and as the crew dropped anchor, a motorboat sped from the beach to come pick Colm and Ava up.
Ava’s heart pounded as she watched the motorboat race towards them. She was nervous, and afraid. She turned to look at Colm, who was standing next to her. “How will this work?” she asked softly. “I don’t even know where you and Jack live. Are you still in Palm Beach?”
“I sold that house. Was kind of short on good memories there, seemed better to just get rid of it.” Colm’s gaze met hers. “Jack and I live in Manhattan.”
Her eyes widened. “I had no idea. Where in Manhattan?”
“Carnegie Hill.”
“That’s a very nice neighborhood.”
“It’s a very nice house, too. You’ll like it.”
He was so sure of himself. She envied his confidence. She wasn’t sure of anything anymore. “And Jack? When will I see him?”
“Soon.” He smiled at her. “Don’t be nervous. There’s no reason to be nervous. Everything is going to be fine.”
“Even though I don’t feel like your wife?” She countered with an unsteady smile.
He gave her a thoughtful look. “I guess that would be a problem. What we need is a wedding. It shouldn’t be a problem. We can put that together in a just a few days.”
“Colm.”
“Don’t worry about a thing. Just leave all the arrangements to me.”
The speed boat slowed, and deckhands went into action, lowering a ladder and tying the small speedboat to the side of the yacht so Colm and Ava could disembark.
The boat swayed as Ava stepped down and she nearly fell. Colm caught her elbow, steadying her.
She thanked him and sat down. Colm took a seat across from her.
Her head was spinning. She was struggling to process the past twenty-four hours. It wasn’t easy to make sense of everything they’d done, and everything he’d told her.
“We really are married,” she said.
He nodded.
“Was it a big wedding?”
“No.”
“It was a very small wedding. A civil ceremony at the Palm Beach courthouse.”
“Why did we marry that way?”
“You didn’t want fuss.”
“Maybe that’s why I don’t remember it. There wasn’t enough fuss.” She met his gaze, grimaced. “Sorry. That was supposed to be a joke.”
“It was funny.”
She made a soft, rough sound. “I don’t think there is any point in marrying again. If we are married, and if we never divorced, why go through all those hoops?”
“Maybe this time you’ll remember.”
“But knowing my track record, probably not.”
“I guess we’re going to be having a lot of weddings then.” He laughed at her stricken expression. “It’s okay. We don’t have to tell anyone. It’ll be our own private thing.”
She laughed, because it was that or cry.
*
The speed boat slowed close to shore, and the driver pulled the motor up and then got them a little bit closer, making it easy for Colm to step out without getting too wet and carry Ava onto dry sand.
They walked along the beach, towards the gondola platform, and in the distance Ava spotted a woman seated on a towel with a small child building a sand castle.
Jack could be that age, she thought, watching the little boy dig with his shovel, his shoulders small but sturdy, his head bent in concentration.
She glanced at Colm, saw he was watching the mother and child, too. “They’re lovely, aren’t they?” Ava asked, feeling the old ache whenever she thought of Jack.
“Very.”
She stopped, shielded her eyes to watch the pair on the sand and Colm stood with her. “I didn’t trap you,” she said quietly. “The pregnancy was an accident, but once I found out about Jack, I wanted him. Badly.” Her heart felt tender, almost bruised. “I still want him. But I just don’t want to hurt him. Not ever again. And I trust you, Colm. I trust you to make sure it won’t happen.”
“You have my word.”
“Because I’d never forgive myself if something happened to him again. I couldn’t hand it. I still hate myself for what happened last year, because I know he’s a miracle. He survived my accident, and my coma, and being born months too early. He’s a gift. I know that. Which is why I can’t let him be hurt—”
“Ava.” Colm swore softly and reached for her. He held her against him, his fingers sliding through her hair. “It’s going to be okay. We’ll make this work. We will.”
“But what if I hurt him again?”
“You won’t.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I have faith, and I believe we can do this. Together.” His blue-green eyes blazed, his expression fierce and determined. “We can.”
Before she could answer, a high jubilant voice shouted, “Daddy! Daddy!
You’re home!”
Turning, Ava saw the little boy in the bright yellow and blue swim trunks sprint across the beach, small feet kicking up the sand. He had big, dark eyes, olive skin, and he was laughing, delighted by the appearance of his father.
“Jack?” she whispered, a hand against her heart.
He looked achingly familiar. Just a wisp of a boy with dark hair that could use a cut. A ringlet lay on his forehead and as he ran, he
reached up, and ruffled his hair, disturbing the curl.
As Colm swung Jack into his arms, Ava realized that Jack looked just like her brother, Tadeo. It was a bittersweet resemblance. Tadeo had died young, just a year after Ava moved to New York.
“Introduce me, Colm,” she said, voice husky.
But Jack didn’t need an introduction. He lifted his dark head from his father’s shoulder and stared at Ava for a long, somber moment before whispering, “You’re my Mommy.”
Ava felt an explosion of pain, the emotion almost unbearable. “Yes,” she answered, reaching out to gently touch Jack’s dark hair. He was beautiful. Still so young. Half-baby, half-boy, she could see the tenderness in him, the softness at the edges of his mouth and jaw and chin.
Jack caught her fingers in his hand and he held them tight. “You came home.”
“Yes.”
“Where were you?” he asked.
She blinked, swallowed the huge lump filling her throat. “Lost.”
His eyes had filled with tears, too. “But Daddy found you.”
Chapter Twelve
‡
Did all brides feel this nervous?
Ava smoothed her ivory and gold couture gown over her tummy, feeling the butterflies grow by the minute. She shouldn’t be so nervous. Colm had said it wouldn’t be a fussy wedding, but moving to her bedroom window she peered through the slats of the plantation shutter and saw the stream of elegant couples heading towards the party tents.
Society wedding.
The words flashed through her mind as she let the shutter close. In less than a half hour she was marrying Colm McKenzie, international tycoon, doting father…sensual lover.
Her cheeks flamed and she felt heat burst to life in her middle, radiating in hot rays of awareness throughout her limbs.
A knock sounded on her door and the door opened. It was Colm.
His thick, dark blonde hair had been combed earlier but he must have ruffled it with an impatient hand and bits stood up at the front.
She went to him and smoothed the front down. “It was a little rock and roll,” she said, smiling at him. “But it did call attention to your cheekbones.”
“I do have fabulous cheekbones.”
She laughed out loud. “You’re mad.”
“For you.”
She shook her head, silently contradicting him.
“Yes. It’s true.” His lips curved in a slow appreciative smile. “And tonight you look simply stunning. You look like a princess. A Spanish princess.”
She smiled ruefully. “My father is a count.”
“And your mother must have been a goddess.”
“I’m serious.”
“I’m sure you are. You’re always serious these days.” He was teasing her but his eyes were brilliant and intent, and she felt his hunger for her. If nothing else, she knew he desired her.
Reaching her side, Colm drew a small jeweler’s box from inside his tuxedo pocket and snapped it open to reveal a sparkling marquis-cut diamond set in platinum. “Your engagement ring,” he said, taking her left hand and slipping the ring onto her fourth finger.
“Is this really mine?”
“It is yours. I’ve been keeping it for you this last year.”
“I am so ashamed I don’t remember—”
“No shame,” he murmured, kissing her, silencing her. “We go forward, not back. There is no living in the past. We celebrate today. And that’s what we will do every day.”
Her eyes welled with tears and Ava held her ring up to the light. She turned her hand this way and that, transfixed by the stone’s radiance. “Look how it sparkles.”
“It’s the way it was cut,” he said, watching her face, not the ring. “The hard cuts reveal the diamond’s true beauty. Like you,” he added, kissing her once more, his lips lingering, making her tummy a crazy somersault.
Ava drew a breath, dragging in air, light-headed all over again. “Thank you.”
Their eyes met and held. She loved the beautiful blue-green of his eyes, so vivid, so intense. So him.
“You’ve always been beautiful, Ava, but the accident revealed your true spirit. You are courageous. A fighter. And a wonderful role model for our son.”
She felt a flicker of feeling in her heart, a tingling much like she’d felt during her rehab as she forced the muscles to life again. “Jack seems happy, doesn’t he?”
“He’s ecstatic. He adores you. Adores every minute with you.”
“Just as I adore being with him.”
“Have you noticed how much he likes to help you remember things? His pictures…his notes…?”
“I have. His nanny is so good, too. She never makes me feel like a third wheel.”
“She is good,” he agreed. “But from the beginning she knew the goal was to reunite you and Jack. And she’s talked to Jack about you and helped create memories for him, of you.”
“And then you’ve put all these scraps and notes and photos in a book for me.” Her heart was on fire but in a good way. It was full of love, full of gratitude. “You’ve given me a life. You’ve made all this possible—”
“Don’t cry.” He caressed her cheek. “This is a happy day.”
“I know. I’m just so thankful. Just so grateful, as I realize we might be able to make this work.”
“Then come with me. I have one more thing to show you. I was going to save it for after the wedding but I want you to see it now.” He led her from her bedroom, down the hall, to his room. They’d waited to share the master bedroom until after tonight’s ceremony. The master bedroom was full of flowers and candles but that was not what Colm wanted her to see. He led Ava to a pair of chairs by the French doors and on one of the chairs was a big ivory leather scrapbook topped with a silver bow.
“For you,” he said.
She sat down in the chair and took the bow off the oversized leather album. A small gold plaque was centered in the middle of the soft ivory leather.
The Story of Us
She looked up at Colm. “Did you make this for me?”
His lips curved, his smile crooked. “Open it.”
She did, and as she flipped through the pages, her eyes filled with tears. He’d taken photos from the week and a half here in St. Barts and added things she’d said, her feelings and memories, as well as Jack’s pictures and drawings. The big book covered just a week and a half of her life and yet it was full of beautiful sunrises and sunsets and smiles and love.
It was filled with love.
She could feel it. See it. Read it. Touch it. Maybe he didn’t say the words, I love you, but they were in every page of this book. In every one of his actions.
He crouched next to her and wiped her tears, one by one. “Why are you crying? This was supposed to make you happy.”
“It does.”
“You’re practically sobbing, baby.”
“I know. And I’m ruining my makeup.”
“Then why the tears?”
She looked up at him, her heart so full she couldn’t contain it all. “I just realized that you really do care for me. You do.”
He carefully caught more tears, swiping gently beneath her eyes. “Of course I do.”
“I wasn’t sure. I didn’t think—”
“Ava, I love you.”
“Because I’m Jack’s mom?”
“Because you are extraordinary. You are Ava Galvan. The love of my life.”
She drew a shuddering breath. “Promise?”
“Yes.”
“Will you put that in the book?”
“Darling, it already is.” And he turned the pages to one of the last pages that had been filled and there was a photo of him and her, the selfie taken on the beach the night they’d dined in the cabana. His arms were around her and they were laughing up at the camera together. Beneath the photo he’d written:
I love you, Ava, more than the stars in the sky and the water in the sea.
She touched the words, over and over. He di
d love her. He did. Even though she was broken and damaged and not the great ballerina…
He loved her anyway.
He loved her for her.
She looked up at him, eyes welling with tears all over again. “I love you.”
“I know. And I thank you, Ava, for teaching me what love is.”
*
Colm had said they were having a wedding overlooking the beach and she’d imagined something pretty and simple, but she should have known nothing Colm planned would be ordinary.
Reaching the garden Ava entered a magical world of gold lanterns and ropes of garland. Two enormous party tents glowed with soft yellow light but these were still empty as all the guests were gathered before a cupola formed from bare branches, decorated with thousands of cream and yellow orchids and roses.
They were waiting for her. As Ava paused and drew a quick breath, she heard the music change, the tempo becoming lighter, faster. She spotted Colm beneath the canopy of orchids and roses and all the knots in her middle dissolved. Yes. Everything was going to be fine.
Everything would be new, and challenging, but most of all, exciting.
The ceremony wasn’t particularly long, but the vows were sincere and heartfelt. Ava felt Jack’s rapt gaze as she and Colm exchanged rings and turning her head, she caught sight of Jack dressed in a black tuxedo, still clutching the ring pillow. His dark eyes were wide, his expression serious. He knew this was a monumental occasion.
He was, she thought, the heart and soul of the future.
Reaching out, she drew him forward, and held his hand in hers as the priest blessed them. This wasn’t just a wedding, this was a homecoming, and Jack belonged in the warm protective circle with them.
When the elegant candlelit ceremony ended, the real party began. Dinner was interrupted repeatedly by toasts and warm wishes from Colm’s friends and Colm himself was eager to celebrate. He started the dancing early by leading a laughing Ava to the empty dance floor. “I can’t do this…I can’t dance anymore.”
“No can’ts. Don’t believe in them. Won’t accept them.”
