by Tawny Weber
He was so big, and she felt so safe, as if life’s more sucktastic moments couldn’t possibly reach her in his arms. Her head knew that was an illusion, but her heart insisted it was a good one. Kade was only one man—and he wasn’t Superman. She really should remember that.
But the shiver that started at the top of her spine and headed south suggested other things she could be doing. Remembering. Kade was a dirty, inventive, talented lover, and his mouth moving over her ear was one good reason to let him hold her just a little bit longer. Focus. He’s reciting a dirty French poem to you, and when will that ever happen again?
“Frère Jacques,” he whispered roughly, urgently against her skin. God, he had a husky bedroom voice, the liquid syllables spilling out of his mouth with a perfect French accent. Except…
“Dormez-vous?”
She felt rather than saw the smile as he pressed a kiss against her throat. He was… singing her a children’s lullaby? Oh, God. His tongue traced the sensitive whorl of her ear, and pig Latin would have been fine with her, as long he kept doing that.
“That’s not French, not really,” she protested breathlessly a long moment later when he twirled her in a lazy circle.
“Sonnez les matines,” he growled, nipping her ear lobe.
Oh. “That’s your secret French weapon?” Because he’d better not have picked a kid’s song for her because she was pregnant.
He put an inch or two of space between them, running his hands up and down her back as he examined her face. “Did it work?”
Pleading the Fifth here. “You memorize a poem in French, the language of lovers, and that’s the one you pick?”
“Guilty as charged.”
Abbie shook her head, and Kade just knew that she wasn’t done with him. Sure, she might not like to talk about her own feelings, but she definitely liked to examine his. If he couldn’t figure himself out, he didn’t think she had a chance, but it was cute watching her try.
The DJ picked that moment to rescue his ass and segued into a slow song. He dropped his hands to her hips and tugged her closer until he had her front pressed against his. He liked this no space thing. Naturally, she wasn’t done poking at these feelings he was supposed to be entertaining.
“Are you trying to distract me with sex?” She wriggled, standing up on tiptoe, which had to be on purpose, because his erection slid down the firm curve of her belly—hello, Peanut, your mom’s boyfriend is a happy man—and nestled between her hips.
“Is it working?” he asked hopefully.
Pressing her mouth against his ear, she whispered something. He had no idea what she was saying—she could have been reciting the dollar menu at a fast-food joint—but the words were husky and sweet, and damned if they didn’t get him going.
“J'aime le souvenir de ces époques nues, Dont Phoebus se plaisait à dorer les statues. Charles Baudelaire,” she finished.
That was it. Abbie had a near-perfect French accent, and there was no way he resisted her now.
“You either know French or you’re whispering another man’s name in my ear.”
As soon as the words left his mouth, he wanted to take them back but that was the problem with talking. Once the words were out there, they were out there. No do-overs or take backs possible, and he was the dumbass who’d just raised the specter of Abbie’s dead husband.
Chapter 15
Kade had teased Katie that her reception looked like it was being held in a large, all-white circus tent; she’d countered with medieval jousting pavilion. Fuck if he had any idea what that was—and he had zero intentions of googling to find out because some mental images he didn’t need—but it wasn’t half-bad from the outside. The tent was large and white, a kind of Zen-like monstrosity that kept the wedding guests in one place.
The tent was also on the edge of the vineyard. The winery stretched out behind them, all flowers and stone walls. The sun was almost down and the waiters were buzzing around, lighting a gazillion candle-filled lanterns. He wasn’t sure why electricity wasn’t romantic, or why white was, but it was Katie’s day. Whatever she wanted, she got. He and Tye were on the same page there.
He and Abbie? Not so much.
Abbie looked up at him, and he had no idea what she was thinking. That was pretty typical, but he’d just landed a conversational bomb that was the equivalent of Hiroshima. Hoping she wouldn’t dump his sorry ass on the spot, he opened his mouth to get a head start on apologizing, but she cut him off.
“Help me forget?”
Forgetting was better than groveling, but he had a better idea. “Why don’t we remember the good parts?”
Of whatever it was she wanted to forget, although coming on the heels of his other man crack, he could guess. She was thinking about Will. He, on the hand, was trying to figure out how to compete with a dead man and win the girl. The sick sense of shame uncurling in the pit of his stomach hadn’t been this strong since he’d pinched penny candy from the local market, and his father had marched him down there to apologize.
She shook her head “I’m not forgetting Will. I’m forgetting what went wrong with our marriage.”
Well. Hell. She slid him a glance as she walked her fingers up the front of his shirt, revealing the next step in her forgetting-the-bad-stuff plan. She wanted to have sex and, ordinarily, he’d have been totally on board with that plan. Right now, however, his collar felt stiff and the shirt had way too many buttons. He had to iron the fucking thing if he so much as leaned back. Wearing his Navy dress uniform had seemed wrong because he’d left that part of his life behind. The SEALs weren’t the team he was part of now, although he’d have the brothers and the scars for a lifetime. That wasn’t a bad thing, but he needed to be moving forward.
Apparently, Abbie felt the same way.
The memories hammered at him. Abbie’s face had glowed as she’d moved up the aisle toward him and Tye. Glow was a stupid, girl word, but it fit, and he’d use it if he wanted to. She hadn’t been coming for him, and her happiness had been all about watching two of her friends get hitched and get started on all that happily-ever-after crap. Kade knew that. But yeah—he’d enjoyed the view and he’d done just a little fantasizing that this was their wedding day, and she was playing bride to his groom.
Stupid. He’d never thought much about getting married, other than his faux engagement to Katie, and that had been both a practical joke on all the well-meaning-but-had-their-noses-in-his-business residents of Strong and a way to help a friend out.
“I’m betting there were good parts.” He sounded hoarse. And more than a little desperate.
She made a noncommittal noise and started towing him outside. He let her pull him along, depositing the beer bottle on an empty table as they went.
Abbie kept moving, a woman on a mission.
“I miss Will,” she said quietly, but he heard her loud and clear.
“We all do.”
It was true too. For no particular reason, that damn bucket list flashed through his head. Funny how he’d gotten that ménage a trois after all. Instead of the fantasy starring him and two hot chicks, however, he’d gotten Abbie Donegan and Will.
Tye was the brother of his heart, but he also had Kade’s life. He’d fallen in love with Katie, Kade’s fiancé at the time, and married her; he even had Kade’s place on the Donovan Brothers jump team. The man had come to Strong specifically to step in for Kade, to pick up the slack, the pieces, everything and everyone that Kade had left in the lurch. Kade appreciated it, even if part of him wished Tye hadn’t been so goddamned good at it. Overachiever.
He looked down at where Abbie’s fingers threaded through his. He’d ended up with someone better, so it wasn’t like he could complain. “Are you taking me to bed?”
“I could be giving you French lessons.” The sweet sultry look in her eyes killed him.
Since he really didn’t want to make love to Abbie in the garden, he started walking back toward the front of the winery. He’d booked a room at an inn
just down the road.
“Did you drive?” He had his truck parked outside, conveniently close by for a speedy getaway.
She shook her head. “Katie organized a limo for us. It’ll take us back after the reception.”
Honestly, he had no idea what the hell he was doing out here with Abbie. She’d made it understood that she didn’t need anything more from him. Hell. She hadn’t needed anything to begin with except, possibly, sex, and Gia Donovan had cheerfully explained pregnancy hormones to him in excruciating detail. He was the one mooning around after her, wondering if they could possibly go back to their high school glory days and see each other again. She was widowed, she was lonely, and she was Will’s.
Scooping Abbie up and depositing her on the front seat of his truck was stupid, but he did it anyways. If she was lonely, he could fix that problem for her. Ditto on pregnancy hormones and forgetting how messed up her life was, at least temporarily.
“Kidnapping’s illegal in all fifty states,” she said cheerfully, making no move to get out of his cab. “Where are we going this time?”
It was dark enough now to make out all the stars, which must have been a view she appreciated, because she stared up at the sky for a minute. Then she grabbed his flannel shirt from the seat and wiggled into it.
It was an hour back to Strong, and he had a perfectly good room two minutes down the street. He’d limited himself to one beer. She wasn’t complaining. So… he knew exactly where he wanted them to go. Turning the key in the ignition, he guided the truck out of the parking lot. Reaching over, she loosened his tie and then pulled the fabric free.
“Do you mind? About Katie marrying Tye?” She asked. No, he didn’t mind, not the way she was thinking.
But part of him felt like Tye had taken Kade’s life… He’d fallen in love with Katie, Kade’s fiancée at the time, and married her; he even had Kade’s place on the Donovan Brothers jump team. The man had come to Strong specifically to step in for Kade, to pick up the slack, the pieces, everything and everyone that Kade had left in the lurch. Kade appreciated it, even if part of him wished Tye hadn’t been so goddamned good at it. Such an overachiever.
When he didn’t answer right away, she turned toward him, a mountain of floaty fabric and the small mound of her stomach where the peanut was working steadily on getting bigger. He’d never thought about having kids or a wife. He wasn’t really a family guy, even if he and Katie had faked an engagement. He’d been a different man back then, someone who loved a good joke, who knew how to laugh. How to live. That guy had disappeared into Khost, and hadn’t quite made it all the way out. Looking at Abbie, however, he wished… fuck, he had no idea what he wished for, but he had a feeling that guy might have known.
“Katie’s happy,” he said gruffly. “She deserves that. If Tye hurts her, I’ll kill him.”
“Uh-huh, unless I beat you to it.” Abbie toed off her shoes with a groan, then started working what appeared to be a pair of thigh-high stocking down her legs inch by inch. God help him, but he enjoyed the show. “So you don’t mind giving up your fiancée to another man?”
“You think losing her to a woman would be easier?” He tried desperately not to think about Abbie getting naked next to him while he hit the gas a little harder. The vineyard stretching out on either side of them was nice-looking, as was the sky above them. Thinking about those things was safe. Peaceful.
“Probably not.” She looked down at the pantyhose in her hand. “I shouldn’t toss these out the window.”
“If you want to do it, don’t let me stop you.”
She looked down at the nylons in her hand. It was crazy and irresponsible, but she rolled down the window of his truck and flung them out into the night air like a flag of… something. Not surrender, but maybe of letting go? She hadn’t even been aware of wanting that, but something inside her lightened as the nylons disappeared behind the truck.
Driving faster than he should, Kade pulled into the parking lot of the B&B where Kade had reserved a room. The place was quiet and he was around and helping her out before she could finish grabbing her stuff. He swung her down, then around in a gentle circle before threading his fingers through hers and pulling her inside with quiet confidence, like this was just the way things were meant to be. And it was so much easier tonight to let go and let Kade. Let him takeover, let him lead.
Maybe it was watching Katie and Tye, so perfectly, obliviously happy on their wedding day. She’d almost had that with Will, but then she hadn’t, and remembering the bad parts now made her an idiot. Kade was right. She needed to keep the good memories, let go of the rest. Something in her opened up, loosened just a little like the scrap of nylon flying down the highway.
“You okay?” He looked down at her, dark eyes warm with concern. He was one of the good guys too, beneath his bad-boy exterior, and tonight he was a risk she wanted to take.
“Make me better.”
He nodded, like everything could be that easy. “You got it.”
She leaned against the wall as he fished his key out of his pocket. No bag, no mountain of crap to cart around. Just what he could fit in his pockets and whatever baggage he hid inside. Darn it. Just for once, she wanted to be normal. If she’d said yes in high school, this could still have been them, coming back to their room after watching their friends get married. He could have been her husband and the peanut their baby. Not wanting to think about that possibility, she brushed past him into the room.
He didn’t give her much time to look around, but her first impression was that it was pretty. He had a big bed, a gas fireplace, and glass french doors covered with gauzy curtains. Housekeeping had already turned down his bed, so they didn’t have to worry about being interrupted. That was good. Throwing herself onto the bed, she grinned at him.
“Strip,” she demanded.
“Someone’s feeling romantic.” But he pulled his jacket off and hung it on the back of a chair, his eyes darkening in anticipation.
“Are you holding out for romance?” Because it had been years since she’d romanced anyone, and her skills were rusty.
He locked the door and moved toward her, tossing his key onto the bedside table. “Maybe one of us should.”
She shrugged, one of the thin straps holding her top up sliding down her arm. His eyes followed. “It doesn’t last. Let’s just have sex tonight.”
“I could persuade you,” he growled.
“I’m stubborn, and I’m all romanced out.” Truth.
“Yeah, but I’m good.”
He wasn’t. He was so, so bad.
“You’re wearing too many clothes.” She went on the offensive.
“That’s something I can fix.” He stripped with quick efficiency, pulling off his shirt. God. His chest was a work of art. He had scars and the dog tags, but he also had muscles she could have admired for hours. Unless, of course, she was feeling impatient, which she was.
“Keep going,” she demanded.
He grinned at her. “We’re not taking turns? Because I think that’s only fair.”
“If you want turns, you should have suggested strip poker, not sex.”
“Sex was your idea, not mine.”
Right. She eyed the impressive erection tenting the front of his pants. “I don’t see you minding.”
“You’ve got me there.” Grinning, he unbuckled and unzipped, shoving his pants and his boxer briefs down his thighs. At some point, he’d managed the miraculous and lost his shoes and socks. “You’ve got your peep show. Now it’s definitely my turn.”
She could work with that. Wriggling an arm behind her, she found the zipper and tugged it down.
The front of Abbie’s dress slid down, thank you Jesus, revealing a peach-colored corset bra. The satin barely cupped her gorgeous breasts, stopping a few teasing inches above the curve of her pregnant belly. The peach color made his mouth water almost as much as the woman herself.
“You look good enough to eat,” he said hoarsely.
“Do
n’t let me stop you.” She smiled, a wide, happy smile, and rose up onto her knees, shimmying the dress down over her hips and—hello—a truly wicked blue thong. The front of her panties skimmed over her mound, teasing him with feminine curves.
“I don’t match,” she said, shooting him a glance full of mischief.
Like he cared. “Get naked and we’ll both match.”
“Good idea.” Somehow she wriggled free of her dress, kicking it onto the floor. He should probably rescue it, but his heart was in his ears, and his dick had other ideas because, sweet baby Jesus, she reached around behind her, feeling for the clasp of her bra, and her breasts spilled over the edges of the satin cups. Abbie. Screw the clothing, because she was all he could think about.
Getting naked.
Over him and on him.
The bra hit the bed. “I’m a lucky man,” he groaned.
“As long as you know it.” She crooked her finger at him. “Come here, Mr. Hotshot SEAL, and show me what you’ve got.”
You, he thought. If I’m damned lucky.
He’d always been good at logistics. Before she could hook her fingers in her panties, he was on the bed, Abbie stretched out on top of him. “Hello,” he whispered, finding her breast with his mouth. Running his hands up her ribs, he cupped her sweet skin, rubbing his thumbs gently over her nipples.
She inhaled roughly. “Kade.”
He loved the way she said his name, part demand, part plea, which meant he just needed to keep finding ways to make her say it. Scream it. Holler it with pleasure.
“Tell me how you want it,” he ordered, and she wriggled against him, the satin of her panties stroking his dick. Damned lucky, he thought again.
“How about now?” She stared down at him, riding him in a long, slow move that was surely going to drive him out of his ever-loving mind.
“I can work with that,” he groaned.
“You feel so good. More.” She ran her hands down his shoulders and over his chest, finding his nipples with her wicked, talented fingers.
