by Jeannie Lin
That night, Chen had lain awake imagining shining black hair and pale, smooth skin. He’d spoken her name aloud. River. The name itself sounded like a dream. River.
He no longer had to imagine. He knew her face and how she held herself. He knew how utterly beautiful she was in sadness and he knew he’d never be able to see her happy.
Chen’s eyelids grew heavy a moment before the door creaked open. Languidly, perfunctorily, he stretched toward his sword, but there was no danger there. At least not the kind that a sword could defeat.
A tentative hand covered his. Cool, delicate fingers.
“River,” he said.
She sat on the edge of the bed and freed the pin from her hair in one perfect motion. He lay back and watched it fall, afraid to move. His breath came and went in uneven pants. She was here, in his bed as he hoped and feared. He had to refuse her, but he didn’t want to.
“This—” He swallowed past the dryness in his throat. “This won’t change anything.”
“That’s not why I came.”
She was dressed in her sleeping garment, a pale tunic over loose trousers, as if she’d already retired to bed before rising to come here. A band of moonlight slanted across the lower part of her face, leaving the rest of her in shadow. He followed every line and curve of her in the dark.
“I can’t spare your brother.”
“I don’t want to talk about him anymore,” she whispered. She came closer. “I don’t want to talk about anything.”
They did share one thing. They both loved Ru Shan as a brother and shared the pain of his betrayal. Did she need to close her eyes and forget as much as he did?
Maybe there was no answer to that. River touched her fingers to his wrist and he went hard beyond reason. He raised himself up and her jasmine perfume surrounded him. By the time he curved his hand over the back of her neck, he was blind with desire.
A small gasp escaped her lips before he crushed his mouth to hers. She was soft. She was soft and warm, and he was being too rough, but she tasted so right.
He pulled away, but couldn’t let her go. The pulse in her throat fluttered beneath his fingers. She regarded him with wide, startled eyes, and in them he saw decision. Resolution.
She reached for his tunic. He reached for hers. He tugged at the linen until her arms were free, her breasts bared. He removed the rest of her clothing, but all he could think of was the soft sloping curve of her breasts. The entire time he reminded himself, be gentle. Be gentle. Be gentle.
He stopped her hand when she reached for his trousers. Instead he laid her back against the bed and stretched himself over her, shoulder to hip, legs intertwined. He needed to press himself against as much of her as he could, breasts, thighs. His yang member strained against the final cloth barrier between them. His mouth scraped hungrily at the base of her throat. There was nothing gentle about it.
River was panting. Her chest rose and fell beneath him. When her arms found their way hesitantly around his neck, his heart opened and bled. Heavens, she was innocent.
He raised his head to look at her. “You’ve never done this.”
It wasn’t a question. He could tell from the way she trembled when he kissed her.
She trailed her hand down his back. “Show me,” she murmured.
He couldn’t refuse her, or himself. Not when his blood was pumping hot through him, and she was looking as if she could only see him before her and nothing else. Not when he hadn’t felt like this, hadn’t felt anything for too long.
He bent and took her nipple between his lips. River stiffened, her entire body arching up. He should have started slower, as untried as she was. Kissed her mouth, her throat. Whispered how beautiful she was. And River was beautiful. He’d tell her a hundred times.
After.
* * *
River sobbed with tortured pleasure as Chen’s tongue stroked over her breasts. He circled his arms beneath her to drag her tight to him. She was grateful for his strength. She needed to be held fast or she would come apart.
From the first moment she touched him, she couldn’t hide any longer. She told herself she was deceiving Chen, but she had been deceiving herself, as well. Part of her didn’t want to flee and disappear into the far reaches of the empire. Her spirit demanded that she stay and fight her battle here, in this very chamber. She was as rebellious as her brother after all.
Chen’s hair was untied. It fell over his face as he bent over her. She wound nerveless fingers through the black strands. He was licking and, dear heavens, biting. His teeth nibbled fleetingly over a sensitive spot below her nipple, on the curved underside of her breast. Who would ever think of such a thing?
She let her head fall back, eyes closed to let the sensations flow over her. This was duty, she had told herself on the cold walk from her chamber. She needed to distract Chen to save her brother and her father.
But this surge of desire was certainly not duty. Not when her body was damp and restless with yearning.
When he pulled away, she tried to kiss him again. Her knowledge was so poor. She wanted to entice him, but what did she know beyond a few kisses, an awkward embrace or so? Chen was a rich expanse of hard muscle and heated skin. She wanted to run her curious hands over all of him, but she was afraid. So she tried to press her lips to his, even though she knew it was clumsy.
He accepted her offering. A low rumble rose from the back of his throat as he took command and showed her how to really kiss. It was an exploration, she learned. A dance. Lips parting, caressing. Different angles. Feeling for pressure and give. And taste. His tongue found hers. He tasted of spice. Cloves and the sweetness of plum wine.
Emboldened, she slid her hand down the sculpted plane of his stomach. But Chen stopped her just as her fingers dipped below the waist of his trousers.
“I don’t understand.” Her voice sounded thick like sugar syrup.
He trapped her wrist and pinned it over her head. She would have protested, but her body wanted him to do to it whatever he willed. And he was kissing her again. An all-consuming kiss.
His next touch was light, against her knee. Her heart pounded. He was still kissing her, but she could no longer concentrate on his mouth. The next touch after that was not as light. On the inside of her knee, parting her legs. She couldn’t breathe. Her skin was flushed and alive.
She whimpered as he found her center, drawing her open with two fingers. One moment a cool rush of air and then heat. He was touching her down there. Stroking her first, and then circling. Indescribable pleasure with each small movement. Hard fingers slipping over soft flesh. More pleasure, growing. She bit down hard on her bottom lip.
She had expected to be taken quickly. Perhaps a bit rough—not with any cruelty. Cruelty wasn’t in him, she was certain of that from the first moment they met. Chen’s touch was rough in an unexpected way. He was direct and unrelenting, drawing out the sensations within her without mercy, while she writhed beneath him.
“Later, I’m going to put my mouth there,” he promised.
A shiver ran down her spine. Could she even bear such an act?
His voice was harsh, but his touch went featherlight. Just the tip of his finger now. Quick and subtle. She’d never been so aware of her own body. She wanted to scream and cry.
Her muscles clenched suddenly. She struggled against the hand that pinned her wrist and against the weight of him draped over her. But it wasn’t a struggle for escape. Her pleasure sharpened to a single point.
She did scream. She suffered a moment of bliss and anguish, and there was nothing to do but cry out.
“Shhh...”
She became conscious of the frantic beating of her heart. Still fast, gradually slowing. She was breathing in gasps. Chen was breathing hard, too, though they had barely moved for the last of it. His face was above her. His eyes glowed.
/> There was a hint of low laughter in his voice as he hushed her. “The servants will hear you.”
Her first coherent thought in a long time was that he didn’t need to worry. No one would hear them.
His smile faded until only the glint in his eyes remained. Rising up, he removed his trousers and stood naked beside the bed. She tried to take in every detail at once. Bronze skin, broad shoulders, narrow hips. And between his hips... She wasn’t too sated to blush.
He climbed over her, his muscles flexing as he positioned himself. Once again he parted her thighs. She opened willingly, knees lifting to accept him.
Her breath caught as the smooth tip of him rested against her. He paused at the sound of her gasp. A tiny barrier of doubt returned. They had become suddenly familiar with each other’s bodies, but they were still strangers. She explored him in the darkness, her hands running over his shoulders and down the muscles of his back.
This was what had remained unspoken between them throughout the night. She would have never dared to sacrifice herself, even for the sake of her brother, if it hadn’t been Wei Chen who had arrived at their shop.
Chen must have seen the question in her eyes, because he kissed her again, giving her precious moments for her body to relax, before taking hold of her hips and easing his hard length slowly into her.
* * *
Heat. Slick, encompassing heat and nothing else.
Gradually he became aware of River clutching his shoulders and the rhythmic pant of her breath as he thrust steadily into her. He groaned her name, watched her eyes close and her lips part.
His release was going to come too soon, but he wanted this to last.
The pleasure rose and took him over until he could think of nothing but thrusting deeper into River’s welcoming body. He tangled a hand into her hair. Her legs curved and locked about his hips. They became nothing but shapes and sensation in the darkness.
River. His River. The reason why he’d come all this way. One final, fierce thrust and he spent himself into her.
Afterward, they lay together unmoving, skin flushed and damp with sweat.
“I dreamed of this,” he murmured, letting his head sink onto the curve of her shoulder. “I dreamed of you.”
CHAPTER FOUR
River was asleep on her side with her back turned to him. Her long hair draped over her shoulder and neck like a curtain, the darkest black against ivory pale skin. It wasn’t long before he went hard again.
He woke her gently, his lips brushing over the back of her neck. She shivered, before turning to fit herself into his arms.
“Why?” he asked.
But she shook her head and wouldn’t speak of it. If they spoke, the delicate bond between them might break apart. Instead of words, he made love to her the way he should have the first time. Carefully. Patiently. Then they slept. Or rather, she slept while he stayed awake a little longer to hold her.
Once he and Ru Shan had run up a mountain trail, pushing themselves farther and harder until their legs ached and their lungs nearly burst. They had expended every last shred of energy. Then, with their minds clear of everything, they began their sword training.
This is what he had done. He had run a hundred li as fast as he could, but not with his body. His spirit was purged and his soul bared. At that moment, he’d conjured a single thought.
This was why he’d come. He’d sworn loyalty to Governor Li’s army, but he’d made another promise in spirit to this woman, long before he’d ever met her. When he’d seen River, that bond pulled tight within him. She felt it, too, he was certain of it now.
He touched River’s cheek. She’d captivated him with her courage as much as her beauty. They had both trusted Ru Shan. They both suffered now that he had turned traitor.
There was no escaping his duty. He was going to find Ru Shan and give him an honorable death. But Chen also needed to do something to put the scales in balance. He could become River’s protector. He’d do everything within his power to honor her and her family.
Eventually, he drifted. When he awoke, it was morning and River had left, but he remembered what he had resolved to do. Chen would bow before the ailing Master Yao that morning and ask to marry his daughter. He hoped their grief would heal in time.
His own family probably still lived on in the hamlet where he was born, but he had been fostered out as a child, handed over as a servant to the nobleman who served another nobleman who served Governor Li Tao. He was meant to be in the infantry, a foot soldier like Ru Shan, but Li Tao’s commanders were always looking for skill. He’d been chosen and trained. The Rising Guard had become his new family, until Ru Shan had offered brotherhood and friendship.
River’s perfume lingered in the blankets. Breathing deep, Chen closed his eyes and thought of her long legs clasped about his hips. She’d disappeared before morning broke. She’d accepted him into her body for one night, but would she accept him as a husband, knowing exactly what he needed to do?
Chen splashed water from the washbasin onto his face and took extra care retying his hair. He ran his hands over his outer robe, trying to smooth out the wrinkles. His pulse beat relentlessly as if an army of hundreds awaited him with broadswords and axes.
He should have come prepared to make a proper proposal, but his thoughts had been far from marriage when he came here. Ru Shan’s father wouldn’t be happy to receive him. River had asked him not to upset the man further because he was ill with grief. The meeting this morning would be tougher than any battle. Chen’s stomach churned, just as it did before combat.
He was thinking of River as he left the room. Already anticipating the next time he’d see her. He could make her happy. He knew he could.
The courtyard outside was empty. Odd.
The sun appeared high enough to indicate they were well into the Snake Hour. He’d stayed in bed unusually late with thoughts of River keeping him warm.
Hadn’t Ru Shan told stories of being awoken before dawn to work in the mill? The servants would all be up, sweeping, cooking. The smell of rice would float from the kitchen. Yet the courtyard was empty. No morning sounds from the kitchen or from any of the rooms surrounding it.
Chen went to the first door and opened it. It was another bedchamber, larger than his, but the furnishings were gone. All personal belongings had been removed. He closed the door and went on to the next room, his muscles tensing. Black bile rose in his throat.
All the rooms were empty. Abandoned.
* * *
River sat in the study at her father’s desk. The walls had been stripped bare of all scrolls and paintings. She’d instructed the servants to take anything of value with them. Those items could be sold or used for bribery if it came to that. If nothing else, the objects of their household would have some sentimental value to Father. Something to remind him of the home his family had built.
She balanced a calligraphy brush over a sheet of paper. Her characters formed a tidy column from top to bottom, right to left. A door slammed nearby and she startled, ruining the character she’d been so carefully writing.
The letter to her father was already finished. This one was to Ru Shan. She hoped it would find its way into his hands somehow.
Another door slammed, followed by the heavy stomp of boots. Her pulse jumped and her palms grew damp. Valiantly, she tried to continue, but her brushstrokes wavered and the characters came out uneven. Ru Shan would see how broken her thoughts were if he were ever to read this.
The door to the study flew open and Chen stood before her. His expression twisted into rage.
“A trick,” he accused through gritted teeth.
Her grip tightened on the brush. The ink pooled below the tip to soak through the paper. She set the implement down with a shaking hand. She’d made a dangerous wager by remaining here.
&n
bsp; “They’re all gone,” she replied. “The servants, Father, Ru Shan—”
He marched across the study until only the desk separated them. “Ru Shan was here?”
She closed her eyes. She hadn’t expected the sight of him to make her stomach flutter or his closeness to render her body weak. It wasn’t fear that made her tremble. She had given herself to this man. He had shown her passion and tenderness, but he would hate her now. She’d betrayed him.
When she opened her eyes he was still glaring at her, his eyes black and endless. She would have done anything to be back in his arms. In the scarce hours between dusk and dawn, she had pretended that the lies didn’t exist between them.
“This won’t save your family, River. This only implicates your father, as well as you, in Ru Shan’s treachery.”
“We were already implicated,” she said sadly. “Such is the burden of family.”
“Why?” Chen demanded.
The last time he’d asked that of her, they’d been skin to skin. He had looked at her as if he would never let her go. Now he looked as if he couldn’t stand the sight of her.
Her chest clenched painfully and her throat went dry. “Just a trick,” she whispered.
“I told you, seducing me would not change my mind.”
“I know that.”
She could no longer tell herself she had gone to his room out of duty and sacrifice. Loneliness and desolation had crawled through the empty rooms like vermin after the last of the household departed. She could have tried to escape with them and risked Chen discovering the deception. Instead she’d stayed. She had gone to Chen searching for something. Anything.
He gripped the edge of the desk and leaned ominously over her. “If I fail, Li Tao will send his personal guard after your brother. They won’t be as merciful as me.”
She needed to calm herself. Her heart was beating too fast. “You won’t find him.”
Like her brother, River was now marked for death. Chen’s sword was strapped to his side. The only time she had seen him without it was in bed. Perhaps she was wrong about him. She’d dishonored and humiliated him. Maybe he would kill her now like he’d vowed to kill her brother. He would call it mercy.
