“Living with you? That sounds better than with my parents.”
Polly took his hand. “I don’t even know how that would work. There isn’t enough room in that apartment for two people to live all the time. I’d end up killing you when you got in my way, I’m sure of that. And there isn’t a good place for you to work. There isn’t any room for either of us to hide from the other if we need quiet time. Besides, who would be responsible for laundry and cooking? And if I have the kids there, you’d go insane with all of the activity.”
Henry was silent and she continued. “I suppose we could find a place for an office for you. It seems like we wake up about the same time every day. And you could shower first because I usually go to the barn. That way you’d be done when I got back.”
She chuckled. “That would be awesome. I could go out and help Eliseo in the barn and then come back and you’d have breakfast all ready for me. Wouldn’t that be great?”
Polly turned to him and watched as his head slowly turned back and forth.
“What?”
“You are seriously talking about this,” he said quietly.
She yanked her hand back to her lap and scooted closer to the door, putting more space between them. “No. I wasn’t. Ignore everything I just said. It wouldn’t work. There isn’t enough room.”
“Don’t you dare panic on me, Polly Giller,” Henry demanded. “We haven’t talked about these things because I want you to be confident that I’m sticking around and that I’m not playing with you, but this time you brought it up and you can’t run from me so easily.”
“I really should go back upstairs. The kids are all alone.”
“They’re fine. We’re right here.”
“But I didn’t tell them where I was going. What if Rebecca wakes up? She’s had a horrible couple of days.”
“She’ll wake Andrew. If we see a light turn on, you can run inside, but you can’t run away from me.”
“I shouldn’t have said anything, Henry.”
“Why not? Why can’t we talk about this?”
“Because the very best way to ruin what we have is to do something stupid like move in together. If you end up hating me, where would you go then?”
“I’d go back home and kick my parents out.”
“Wrong answer,” she snapped.
Henry took a breath. “I’m sorry. The right answer was, ‘I won’t ever end up hating you.’ That was a bad reaction on my part. Polly, what will it take to convince you that I’m in love with you and want to spend the rest of my life with you?”
Polly couldn’t control herself. She glanced at her left hand, then quickly covered it with her right hand.
“Would that work?” he asked.
“Would what work?”
“Will you finally trust me if I ask you to marry me?”
“Henry, that’s not what I meant.”
“I know. You’ve told me over and over that you aren’t ready to go that far, that you aren’t finished with being Polly Giller yet. Can you tell me why you can’t be Polly Giller and be married to me all at the same time?”
Polly started to answer and caught something out of the corner of her eye, then chuckled when she saw lights flash behind them.
Stu Decker got out of his vehicle and walked up to Henry’s side of the truck, motioning for Henry to roll his window down.
“What’s up, Officer?” Henry asked.
“We’ve had reports of vandalism here at Sycamore House and it looks like I might have caught you in the act, sir,” Stu said with as straight a face as he could muster.
“I have an alibi. The owner is sitting right here.”
Stu waved at Polly. “I saw your truck parked here and thought I should check it out just in case. I was pretty sure it was you, but didn’t want to drive away and then be called back and feel horrible because I’d missed the obvious. Are you two just out enjoying the beautiful evening?” He pointed at Polly, “You don’t dress up much for dates anymore, do you?”
“Go bother someone else,” she said. “Or I’ll tell your boss you were slacking on the job.”
“We wouldn’t want that,” Stu said. He reached in and shook Henry’s hand. “Have a good night. Nice to see you both.” He turned and walked back to his car and Polly shivered as Henry rolled his window back up.
“Where were we?” he asked.
“I don’t know. I really don’t want to talk about this tonight.”
Henry expelled his breath … loudly. “When will you want to talk about it? You have to give me some credit for being incredibly patient, don’t you?”
“Of course I do, but you aren’t going to give me an ultimatum or something, are you?”
“What do you mean?”
“That if I don’t talk about it your patience will run out?”
“No, Polly. I love you. That doesn’t ever run out.”
“But what about waiting? Will you get tired of waiting for me?”
“I’m already tired of it, but that doesn’t mean I’m going anywhere. I can’t make you be anything different than you are. I fell in love with you, not someone I want you to be.”
“That was really the right answer,” she smiled. “Okay, here’s the deal. I will talk about all of this with you. I promise.”
“Okay …” He hesitated. “What does that mean?”
“I want to spend time talking to you about everything, but I want to be alone with you and wear normal clothes.” She gestured at her body, then pointed upstairs. “I don’t want to worry about kids asleep in my apartment or deputies pulling in behind us. I want to talk to you and listen to you all at the same time. Yes?” She looked up at him.
“Absolutely. When do you want to have this long, private conversation?”
“Your dad leaves on Friday to go back to Arizona, right?”
“Yes, and he and Mom will be in town on Monday.”
“Then we will try for an evening next weekend. I promise.”
“That sounds fair.” Henry took her hand again, pulling it to the top of the console. “So what’s going on with Sarah?”
“I don’t know, Henry. I have no idea. I spent the entire day baking and doing laundry so that I wouldn’t have to think about it. I should have brought you a platter of goodies.”
“Why do you have to be the one who worries about this?”
“There is no one else. She has no family and no friends and if this cancer is as bad as she is afraid it is, she won’t be able to work. I can’t let them be evicted from their home and worry about paying for chemo. That stuff is expensive. Doctor Mason was great getting her down there and I know he is good about helping people who need help, but that isn’t going to last very long.”
“Have you called Lydia?”
Polly flung her hands up, “I can’t call her every time I don’t know what to do. She has so many things on her plate.”
“But she’d give you good advice and tell you who to contact to get help for this woman.”
Polly turned to face him, pulling her leg up on the seat. “Okay, I was kind of thinking about one thing and I know you’ll think I’m nuts, but it’s totally doable.”
He rolled his eyes.
“Stop that. I want to ask her stay in a room in the addition.”
Before she could go any further, Henry put his hand on her knee, “Polly. You can’t.”
“What do you mean? She can’t afford to stay in that house if she isn’t working. If she lives, then she can do something else. If she doesn’t, Rebecca shouldn’t be on the street wondering where she’ll sleep or how she’ll eat. I won’t walk away from them.”
“But you can’t take responsibility for this woman’s health.”
“Why not? If she needs someone to take her to Boone for chemotherapy, I can drive. If she needs someone to make sure her daughter gets to school every day, I can do that. If she needs someone to pick up medicine for her at the pharmacy, I can do that. If she needs someone to change her sheets and
make sure that she eats every day, why can’t I do that?”
“Because it will take up your whole life and you have a lot of things right now that require your attention. You have animals and friends and a business. We’re trying to get the hotel renovated. There things you’re responsible for. You can’t do this.”
“Like hell I can’t. If we don’t take care of each other, what in the world are we good for?” Polly stamped her foot on the floorboard, making the truck shake. “How can you ask me to leave this poor woman alone? She has no one else. Would you be able to ignore her?” She was yelling by this point.
“Whoa. I’m sorry. But Polly, you have no idea what it will take to get this woman through all of the treatment that she’s about to face. There will be days when she can’t do anything for herself at all. You will have to do that. This has the potential to be the worst thing you have ever been through.”
“It’s not the worst thing I’ve ever been through. I lost my mom and that was the worst thing,” Polly said. She spun back around in her seat and put her hand on the door handle and then said in measured tones. “I’m furious that your response is to tell me that I can’t do something rather than to help me find a way to make it happen. If you are going to spend a lifetime stopping me rather than encouraging and helping me, I don’t know that we even need to bother having that conversation next week.”
She opened the door and got out. “Good night, Henry.” Before he could respond, she shut the door and went back inside. She didn’t want to go upstairs, so she slumped into the chair in Andrew’s nook and dropped her head to the desk.
“Polly?” Henry put his hand on her shoulder. He’d gotten in through the doors very quietly. He knelt down beside her. “You’re right. I’m the last person who should tell you that you can’t do something. You are my Polly and if you decide that things need to happen, you find a way. You’ve never been unreasonable and I was wrong to assume that you hadn’t given this some thought. Maybe I was just afraid of how much time this would take away from me. I will help you do whatever you want to do for Rebecca and her mother.”
She threw her arms around him, “Thank you. I couldn’t imagine how I was going to live without you.”
They held on to each other as she cried. Finally she pulled back. “I thought I’d completely wrecked my life when I walked away from your truck, but I didn’t know how to fix it. I’m sorry I got irrational and stomped away.”
“I figure that you can fix just about anything else, so I can make sure that I help us fix this …” he gestured between the two of them. He stood up and groaned, then sat down on the desk in front of her. “This evening certainly went a thousand different ways than I expected. I really just wanted to come over and do a little necking with you in the truck and tell you how much I missed you.”
“We can go back out and do that,” she said coyly, batting her eyes at him.
“With what you’re wearing, it’s probably a terrible idea.” He drew his finger down her throat and rested it at the top of her sternum. “I love you, Polly. I’m not going to run away and I’m not going to let you go, no matter what.”
Polly leaned her head on his forearm. “I know that. I’m sorry for freaking out on you tonight. That wasn’t fair. I know this is going to be tough and I know that I’m probably getting in over my head, but I can’t walk away from these people.”
“It drives me nuts when you get mad, drop a bomb on me, and then walk away. I know you can’t walk away from people who need you. I will try to tell you what my fears are without telling you that you can’t do something.”
“I’m not very good at having people confront me. I’m sorry. But, I have to help her, Henry.”
“I will help you do whatever it takes. I will always help you. But first, I think you need to call Lydia. She is much more aware of different ways to care for people in need.”
“Do you really think I shouldn’t bring her here to Sycamore House? Isn’t that what this place is all about? Giving shelter to people who need it?”
“You’re right,” he sighed. “Of course you’re right. Spend some time thinking about how you can make it work. It would be easier for you if she could be upstairs, but she may get so weak that she can’t negotiate the steps.”
“That’s why I thought she could stay in one of the rooms in the addition. If she’s in the back room, she can see the sycamore trees come to life this spring and watch the horses and donkeys play in the pasture.”
“Where would you put Rebecca?”
“I haven’t thought it all the way through. She can stay with me and when her mom is feeling good, she can stay with her. I’d open up the other room on that floor if I needed to.”
“You probably don’t want a ten year old living by herself, especially if her mom isn’t in any condition to care for her.”
“There are a lot of things to think about, but I’m glad you’re on my side.”
“I’m always there, even when I say things that make you mad. This week will probably bring a lot of changes to your understanding of what Mrs. Heater’s needs are. Don’t do anything rash until you know what’s happening, okay?”
“I can be patient.”
“Okay. Go back upstairs and try to get some sleep. I love you, Polly girl.”
“You’re still trying to replace pretty girl, aren’t you?” she laughed.
“I haven’t got it yet, have I?”
“Nope, but you’ll find it.” Polly stood up and kissed his lips, then leaned into his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. “I love you, Henry.”
“I love you too.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Polly’s week had gone by in a blur. Every waking moment was spent in a rush of activity. She had called Lydia on Sunday for advice on how to help Sarah with medical bills. Because of Lydia’s large circle of friends, she knew exactly who to contact. Lydia had driven down to meet with Sarah on Tuesday and returned with plans for a community fundraiser. Sylvie agreed to donate her time to cook the meal, Sycamore House would donate the location and the food, and word was going out. Lydia assured Polly that if people had an opportunity to show up at Sycamore House for any kind of a party, they’d take it, just to see what happened next.
Polly took Rebecca to the hospital each evening to see her mother. Sarah’s prognosis was tentative. She had begged her doctors to be upfront with her and they’d been quite blunt. She was scared, but knew she wanted as much time with Rebecca as she could get.
Jeff kept Sycamore House pretty busy, but had laughed when Polly asked if a room would be available. He knew better than to fill them completely. Polly always had something come up. By the time Sarah got out of the hospital, he’d be ready for her.
On Monday, Polly spent the day at Henry’s house, directing the carpet cleaners and re-hanging drapes. The next three days were spent at the hotel. She had finally finished in the basement of the caretaker’s house. Plaster walls and ceilings were ripped out of guest rooms and she’d helped haul debris to the dumpsters.
Rebecca had created a space in the living room for her things and each night when Polly tucked her into the sofa, she got a quick hug from the little girl. During the drive back and forth to Boone, Rebecca opened up about her hopes and dreams for the future. No matter what life Sarah Heater had lived, she wanted more for her little girl. Andrew had dragged Rebecca to the library to get her own card and the two of them were often found tucked into his nook, reading and writing.
Today was going to be another busy day. Lori Victor was finally bringing her son over to see the horses. Polly had contacted her a couple of times throughout the week to schedule something, but Lori had been too busy. Polly wasn’t sure what that was all about. Lydia had also been rebuffed in any attempt to help. Beryl had initially been excited about spending some time with Seth. As much as Beryl didn’t like most normal people, for some reason she was entranced at the thought of introducing a child with special needs to art. As Lydia told i
t, Beryl had prepared an entire crate of things for the little boy, but Lori never responded.
Polly had called Aaron a couple of times throughout the week to see if he could tell her anything more about Bruce Victor’s death, but he was uncommunicative. All he would tell her was that they were working on it and they didn’t have enough to accuse anyone of the murder. She’d told him about Bill Sturtz’s thoughts regarding Annalise Stephens and her brother Simon. Aaron listened and told her he would look into it.
Now Polly was at her dining room table with her laptop in front of her. Rebecca had spent the night with the Donovans and Sylvie was taking them to school this morning. Andrew and Rebecca had a project due for social studies and they wanted to finish it. Polly found that she missed the little girl, even though she’d slept soundly for the first time in a week with no one else around to worry about. That was one of the things her father had laughed about after she’d gone away to college. For the first time since her mother had died, he slept through the night without waking. Whenever she came home, he told her he dropped back into the pattern of waking up through the night to listen and make sure everything was still okay.
Tapping idly on her keyboard, Polly smiled at the memory of her father. Henry was taking his dad to Des Moines today. Bill Sturtz was flying to Arizona to begin the drive back with his wife. She couldn’t wait to get to know the two of them better. They hadn’t spent a great deal of time together at Christmas. Friends and extended family had pounced when it was known the Sturtzes were back in town.
Polly wondered if she should have another conversation with Henry about him moving in. She couldn’t imagine how an independent man in his mid-thirties could possibly live with his parents again. She gave her head a quick shake. Her apartment wasn’t set up for two people. That could be a disaster of monstrous proportions. The last thing she wanted to do was set their relationship up for failure.
Why in the world was she so afraid that it would be awful? She pushed the lid of the laptop closed and stood up. This relationship frustrated her to no end. She loved him but was afraid of messing things up. She wanted to be with him, but oh my goodness, she loved the peace and quiet of being alone. She trusted him completely, but didn’t want to give up her independence.
Diane Greenwood Muir - Bellingwood 06 - A Season of Change Page 13
