“This, Star, is just the beginning. I’m off to the London book fair in Earl’s Court next week and we’ll sell the foreign rights there. I think this series will do very well on the foreign language markets. Obviously, the American rights will be auctioned off in a similar way in two weeks’ time. That should be a sizable chunk too. Probably a similar amount to that paid by the UK.”
I walk to a couch and sit down, but I’m so exhilarated I can’t even sit still.
“Why don’t you pop into the office tomorrow and we can discuss all the details then?”
“I will.”
“Book an appointment with Lisa.”
“Mr. Thiel?”
“Yes.”
“Thank you so much. I’m so glad I found your agency. You and Daria and all the girls have been amazing.” My voice breaks. “You have no idea how awesome it is just to be published. Let alone all these crazy sums of money you’re throwing around. I never imagined.”
“Don’t thank me, Star. It was a pleasure to read your book, and to represent you. Now, why don’t you start making arrangements to go out and celebrate your windfall.”
I laugh through my tears of joy. “Okay. Thank you again.”
I hang up and stare out of the window into the garden. Tears are running unchecked from my eyes. I don’t know why I’m crying. Then I call Rosa.
“Make it fast,” she says. “I’m real busy.”
“Rosa,” I sob. “Peter sold my series.”
“So why do you sound so cut up about it?”
“It’s for really a lot of money.”
“Oh yeah? How much?”
“£350,000 to start with.”
“What?” she bursts out. “Jesus, Star. That is incredible.”
“I know. Peter says the US publishers will probably offer a similar sum.”
“Oh. My. God. You are rich!”
I laugh. “It is a lot, isn’t it?”
“I’m so proud of you, Star. This is the best news I’ve heard for the last ten years.”
“Thanks,” I say shyly.
“Have you told Nigel?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“I’ll tell him later. He’ll be at work now and I don’t want to disturb him.”
‘Does Nikolai know?”
“Not yet. I’ll tell him after this call.”
“Where is he anyway?” she asks.
“In his study.”
“Go tell him the good news, then. I’ve really got to go, but I’ll call you later. Congratulations, babe.” She blows kisses before ending the call.
I stand up and pace the floor. I know what I must do, but some part of me doesn’t want to do it. I know I have to. I walk to Nikolai’s study and knock on the door.
“Come in,” he calls.
I open the door and am confronted by a roomful of men in expensive suits. Every face turns to look at me.
“Oh, sorry. I didn’t realize you were busy,” I apologize, backing away.
“Excuse me, gentlemen,” Nikolai says, and stands.
“Don’t worry, don’t worry, I’ll catch you later,” I say quickly, and close the door.
I cover my mouth with my hand. Shit. I hope he’s not mad at me for interrupting his meeting. It looked important. The door wrenches open behind me. I whirl around and Nikolai is standing there, his eyes narrowed.
“What is it?” he asks.
“Oh, it was nothing really. It can wait until you finish.”
“If you found it important enough to come looking for me I want to know what it is.”
I smile. “It’s nothing bad.”
His expression doesn’t change. “What is it?”
“Well, Peter Thiel called.”
“Uh … huh.”
“They sold my series.”
His expression softens. “Yeah?”
“Guess how much?”
His lips twist. “I don’t know. Surprise me?”
“This is just for the UK and English speaking worldwide market. It doesn’t include America, or the foreign language translations.”
He nods.
“£350,000.”
He smiles, a genuine smile. “Well done, little butterfly. That’s brilliant.”
I bite my lip. “I … I wanted to thank you. If not for you I wouldn’t have had the guts to send my work.”
He shrugs away my thanks. “You would have eventually sent it anyway.”
“Anyway, I was thinking I should use some of it to pay you back. It was not fair what Nigel did.”
He starts frowning.
“I mean. I feel responsible. He’s my husband after all.”
He stares at me.
“Maybe we can work something out and I can return home sooner.”
I see a flash of something in his eyes, it looks like hurt, but it’s gone so quickly I must have imagined it. How can it be hurt anyway?
“All right,” he says and his voice is even and neutral. “We’ll work something out when we go out to celebrate tonight.”
I feel a strange sense of emptiness in the pit of my stomach. Like how I felt when my pet rabbit died. Loss. This is it. This is the end of our time together. I force a smile. “Okay.”
“Buy something pretty to wear tonight,” he murmurs.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I’ll get Sophia to sort an account in a nice boutique for you.”
I smile softly up at him. I want to touch his face but I don’t. He is not for me. Nigel is my husband. I take a step back. “I’ll never forget you, Nikolai.”
He stares at me for a moment saying nothing. “No, I guess you won’t,” he says softly.
“Right, I guess you better get back to your meeting.”
“Hmmm …”
I take another step back and then I take two steps forward and, lifting myself on my tiptoes, kiss him on his cheek.
Then I turn around and run away from him, because I don’t understand what is going on in my heart.
Chapter Forty-Three
Star
I go back to my room and pace the floor. I know I should call Nigel. I should give him my good news, but for some weird reason I am reluctant. I never told him I sent my work and it feels like a betrayal. Or maybe I’m just afraid he will say something that will spoil my joy. Or I could just be afraid of how he will react to me earning money. Being financially independent.
For ages I hang around in my room unsure about how to break the news to him. Eventually, I decide that I won’t tell him just yet. I will tell him once I have brokered something with Nikolai. Once I know exactly when I will be leaving for home. That will be better. More sensible. Anyway, I don’t want to tell him on the phone. I need to see his face when I tell him.
I call Cindy and she squeals with delight. Then I call my nan. Granddad picks up the phone and I break the news to him.
“I didn’t hear it right, Love. What did you say?”
I grin happily. “No, Granddad, you heard right.”
“Three hundred thousand pounds?”
“No, three hundred and fifty thousand pounds,” I correct cheekily.
“Pull the other one, little monkey,” he says with a laugh
“I swear I’m not joking, Granddad.”
“Crikey, lass. That’s a whole heap of money.” He holds the phone away and shouts for my nan.
When she comes on the phone it gets a lot more colorful and we end up laughing like crazy.
That afternoon, Andrei drives me to a very exclusive boutique in Notting Hill. As soon as I enter, a beautiful woman with glossy dark hair, and wearing a glamorous, two-tone dress, stands up and greets me. She must be in her thirties, or even older, but she is as well preserved as a Hollywood celebrity.
“Hello, you must be … Star.” Her voice is throaty and she is not English.
“Yes. That’s me.”
“And you’re looking for a special outfit,” she says with a smile, but her smile doesn’t reach her eyes. She lo
oks at me with a knowing, almost pitying expression.
“Yes,” I say carefully.
“Come with me and I’ll show you what we have in the way of very exclusive, one off designs. Some of them are practically off the catwalks.” She walks me to the back of the shop. “I have picked out something special that I think will suit you very well.”
She takes me to a curtained off area where there are two dresses on the rack. “I think the red one would be perfect on you,” she says.
I walk up to it and touch it. Something is bothering me. I don’t like this woman, and I don’t want to buy anything from her.
“You’ll look beautiful in it. Niko likes his women in red.”
Niko.
I don’t get to call him that. I don’t turn around. I know now what is bothering me. Either she was, or still is, his lover. He sent me to buy a dress from one of his lovers! What an unfeeling bastard. Somehow that hurts me. Really deeply. I don’t know why it does, but it does. The air feels thick and poisoned and I feel as if I can’t breathe. I turn around.
“I’m sorry, but I’m suddenly not feeling very well. I’ll have to come back another day.”
She frowns. “Oh?”
I start walking away from her. I can’t even bear to look at her. He’s been touching her, holding her, entering her body. I quicken my pace and open the door. Outside, Andrei looks at me funnily.
“Are you all right?”
“Yes. Can you take me back please?” I croak.
He walks to the car and opens the back-passenger door for me. I slip in and he shuts it and goes around the front. Less than five minutes later my phone rings.
“What’s the matter?” Nikolai asks.
“Nothing. I must have eaten something that didn’t agree with me.”
There is silence on the other end.
“Where are you going now?”
“Back to the house.”
“Do you need a doctor?”
“No. I’m fine. Really.”
“Do you want Bella to send over some dresses for you?”
“No,” I say quickly. “Don’t bother her. I think I have something I can wear.
“All right. I’ll see you at the house later this evening.”
“Okay.”
I lean back against the seat feeling strange. What is the matter with me? Why did I react so badly just because that woman and he were lovers in the past? Oh my god. What if they are still lovers? My stomach starts churning. I feel physically sick. I clutch my stomach and take deep breaths and the feeling goes away. I stare out of the window. Why don’t I feel happy? I’ve just achieved my biggest dream.
As we get to Victoria, Rosa calls.
“How is the soon to be published author?” she asks.
“She’s fine,” I say, and my voice wobbles.
“What’s the matter?” she demands immediately.
“I wanted to buy a dress, but the owner of the boutique was one of Nikolai’s lovers so I got out of there fast, and now I don’t have anything to wear tonight,” I sob. I know that is not the reason I’m upset, and saying it like that makes me sound like a spoilt brat, but I don’t want to face any unpleasant truths right now. I’m too afraid to look down into the abyss. I’m terrified of what I will see.
For a few seconds there is a shocked silence from Rosa’s side. I have never behaved this way before. “Look,” she says. “A really gorgeous black and gold Dior came in yesterday. It’s for a fashion shoot next Monday. It’ll be perfect for you. Want to borrow it?”
“Oh, my god, yes,” I sob. By now tears are running down my face.
“I’ll come around about six,” she says.
“Okay.”
“Have you got gold shoes?”
“I’ve got black.”
“Sandals?”
“Mmmm.”
“That’ll do.”
“Thanks, Rosa,” I sniff.
“Hey. You know what?”
“What?”
“For the first time ever I know that everything is going to work out for you.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Just trust me on this one. I can see things you can’t. You don’t have to do anything. Just let everything happen in its own time.”
“What do you mean?”
“Go with the flow and you’ll see what I mean. See you later.”
Chapter Forty-Four
Star
“Holy Mother of God!” Rosa says, her eyes as big as saucers, when I meet her in the hallway.
“And he bought the house next door for his staff,” I whisper.
“Now why can’t I find a man like that for me?” she says with a dramatic sigh.
“Come on, let’s go upstairs.”
I take her to my room and she lays the zipped up clothes carrier on the bed and looks around her. “So: this is how the super-rich live.”
“The weird thing is all this doesn’t attract me at all. I’ve never wanted this. I still don’t. I want a nice house, a family, and a man who loves me to death.”
“Well, why can’t you have that and this?”
“I think when you have this much money you think you deserve more than one woman. There’s so much choice. So many women throwing themselves at you. It must take a saint to say no.”
“Oh, I don’t know. I think I can totally rock being with a billionaire. So many people to boss around. Delicious.”
I laugh. “God, you’re bad enough at Christmas when you sit there with a mug of tea like a Queen and order Cindy and me around until we get your Christmas tree exactly the way you want it. And that thing with the lights.”
“Yes, I do love my Christmas lights.” She grins.
There is a knock on the door.
I run to it and open it. Yana is outside.
“Can I get your guest something to drink?” she asks.
I turn around to Rosa. “Want anything to drink?”
“Double vodka and orange juice. Go easy on the juice.”
“And I’ll have a Gin and Tonic please,” I tell Yana.
She nods and withdraws.
“Come and look at your dress then,” Rosa says, unzipping the gray plastic covering.
She pulls the dress out and I gasp.
“Oh, Rosa. It’s gorgeous but I can’t wear that. It’s a mini.”
“What do you mean? It’s practically made for you.”
I sit on the bed and look at her. “Rosa. That dress is practically made for you. You can carry off looking sexy while you’re cleaning your toilet. I’m a mere mortal. I have thick thighs.”
“You don’t have thick thighs.”
“I know I have thick thighs. Even Nigel says that.”
“Nigel is an idiot.”
“Regardless. I can’t wear that.”
“Yes, you can. The secret to looking sexy while cleaning your toilets is confidence. Now stop whining and get into this dress now,” she says bossily.
She picks up the dress and turns it around so I can see the back. “Tell me this isn’t the ultimate in luxury.”
“Wow!” I say and walk up to it.
The dress is beautiful from the front. It is in two parts. The top is entirely beaded with gold crystals. It is classy with a high A-line neckline and a cute flirty short skirt, but the back is something else. It is sexy and luxurious. It leaves the wearer’s back bare but for two strips of delicate gold lace that run down to the skirt.
Helga, one of the staff, knocks on the door and enters with our drinks.
“Thank god,” Rosa says and takes a long sip.
She sits on the bed propped by pillows and crosses her ankles. “Go on then. Put it on.”
There is no use trying to argue with Rosa when she gets like this, so I quickly undress and put the dress on.
“What do you think?” I ask uncertainly. I’ve never worn something this short since I was a kid.
“Hold your hair up,” she orders.
I bunch my hair and hold it at
the top of my head.
“Turn around.”
I obey.
“Stunning. You’ll blow his mind.”
I walk over to the mirror and look at myself. The dress is beautiful, but honestly … I’m not sure I can carry it off.
Rosa appears in the mirror beside me. “Star, do you think I’d send you out of this house if I didn’t think you could take on every woman who glances at Nikolai with greedy eyes?”
I shake my head.
“Exactly. Trust me. I do this for a living. I know what I am talking about.”
“Rosa?”
“Mmmm.”
“You said Nikolai dates models, didn’t you?”
She nods. “Yeah, he likes models. So?”
“All his relationships don’t last, do they?”
“No, they don’t, but you know what I say. Even George Clooney got caught in the end.”
I smile sadly. “Have you heard any stories about him?”
“I didn’t pay much attention to them.”
“Tell me, Rosa.”
“There is nothing to tell,” she insists with a laugh.
“I spent so many years with my head in the sand. I’m learning to be different. To ask questions. To find things out for myself. You’re not protecting me by hiding stuff from me. I want to know where I stand.” “Okay. Most of it was just salacious gossip. It’s normal with him being so rich and handsome, but one thing did stick out though.”
“What?”
“Apparently, the rumor is he won’t go out with blonde women.”
“I’m blonde.”
“I know. Once he was dating this model, I even know her, and she changed her hair color to blonde so he just dropped her like a hot potato. She tried changing it back but he had already lost interest.”
“Isn’t it weird that he chose me?”
“Very weird, which is what makes me say don’t rock the boat. Just go with the flow. You never know what’s waiting on the other side.”
“All this is neither here nor there, anyway, since I’m going back to Nigel. I’ve already told Nikolai that I’ll be using some of my money to pay the debt back and—”
“You did what?” she explodes.
“Well, it seemed like the right thing to do …”
Submitting to the Billionaire: A Dark Billionaire Romance Page 18
