by R. S. Elliot
“We can set her up for two weeks with our hospital down the street.” Dolores sets to work typing up the information. “With your insurance and the credit on your account, you’ll still have plenty left over if they want to hold her for an additional week or two.”
“The what?” Did I hear her correctly? Good Lord. How much did this man pay?
“You have an additional credit on your account.” Dolores looks at me like I shouldn’t be this confused or upset about someone paying all my medical expenses. “I’m not sure how they did this. I’ve never actually seen anything set up like this before. Are you sure you didn’t sign up for any assistance programs?”
“I’m sure. Fine. Whatever we have to do,” I say, taking a look back at my mother in the chair across the hall from us.
I don’t want to imagine leaving her in that place, all alone and terrified about what’s happening around her. How will I be able to visit her like that? I’ll probably start crying my eyes out on the spot. Then where will that lead us? It certainly wouldn’t be the best method for making her feel better.
Still, I tell myself this is necessary. This is what will get mom feeling better, what will make it easier for me to leave her alone again. I’ll have time to go back to work, complete my studies at home.
Spend time with Zach.
A pang twists in my chest. I’ve been so horrible to him these past few days, ignoring his phone calls and texts, yelling at him for trying to take care of me. I didn’t want any help at all. I wanted to do everything myself.
Why? To prove I could do it? To have an achievement that says I did all this on my own without asking for assistance? And where had that led me? Overworked, stressed and pushing away the people in my life I loved the most.
I don’t want to be that person anymore. I don’t want to be the woman who turns down any opportunity to spend time with my friend in favor of working extra hours. I want to be able to see my mother every week, to really take care of her, instead of paying part of her bills every month.
I want Zach. I want to give him all my love, share his burdens as well as relinquishing some of my own.
We’re supposed to be doing this as a team.
Yet, he was not the only one acting as a team of one. I’d tried so hard to do everything myself, and it all fell apart in the end. The only time I’d really let anyone help was for the proposal. And now, I’m well on my way to seeing that dream realized.
I guess having someone to help you navigate issues like this really does make a difference.
“Ooo.” Lyndsey trills beside me. She’s looking over one of the pamphlets from the information packet on the psychiatric hospital Dolores gave us. “This place is nice. Becky’s uncle had to stay here one time when he had that mental breakdown after his wife left him, and he said it was nicer than the Four Seasons.”
“Why is Becky telling you about her uncle’s stint in a mental hospital?”
Lyndsey raises an authoritative finger in the air. I feel a lecture coming on already. “First, stints are for jail. Your mom is going to be fine. She’s getting all the help she needs. And second, you know Becky is a blabbermouth. I don’t even think she has an off button. I’ve had to start carrying earplugs with me whenever we hang out.”
“Then why even hang out with her?”
“Because my best friend is always busy working.”
“Yeah, well.” She got me there. Dammit. I really need to be a better friend. I need to be a better everything. All I’ve been these past few years is a workhorse. “I know. I’m going to try harder from now on.”
At least with these bills paid, I finally have some money to take care of myself for once.
We make it home, and I help my mother into bed. She’s still so weak from everything her body went through a few days ago, not to mention still thoroughly emotionally drained, I feel like I’m caring for my elderly grandmother instead. God rest her soul.
I collapse on the couch beside Lyndsey. “What am I supposed to think about all this?”
“Which part? Your mom being placed in the hospital or Zach paying off your bills?”
I glare at her.
She tosses her hands up in the air in an attempt to deflect the anger shooting out of my stare. “Well, I mean, if that’s what you’re worried about, move on, girl. Some girlfriends get flowers and perfumes. You get your medical bills paid off. I’d say you’re winning.”
This gift is a little more extravagant than flowers. Even for a former billionaire. We’ve slept together, exchanged deep dark secrets about our lives with one another. But nothing else about our relationship has been set in stone. We haven’t even been able to date freely or be together longer than forty-eight hours before one catastrophe or another tears us apart.
“You can’t say you’re not happy to see that debt erased,” Lyndsey says. “Plus your mom gets everything she needs now. You should be thrilled.”
“I’d be more thrilled if he were here,” I explain. “I just keep pushing him away. I haven’t answered his phone calls in the last couple of days. It doesn’t matter, he hasn’t called me in a while now. He’s probably given up. I’m not even sure what I’d say if I did try to talk to him.”
“You can tell him you love him.”
I roll my eyes.
Ugh. This nightmare keeps getting worse and worse.
Am I in love with him? There’s no doubt about it. Even after all the heartache this man has caused, there’s no one else I want standing beside me at this moment. I want his arms around me, his voice offering soothing words of hope and reassurances. But what if I’ve ruined my chances with him forever? What if he’s finally realized how wrong we are for one another and moved on?
I don’t want to talk about how hopelessly I’ve fallen in love with this man, when I may never speak to him again.
“C’mon, Aly.” Lyndsey tugs on my sleeve. “You can’t hide from this anymore. If you love him – and please honey, none of us are blind – you need to tell him. Even more, you need to forgive him for whatever it is he did to you. Because there’s no way you’re this upset about him hiding what Jackson did from you.”
No. I suppose I had forgiven that a long time ago. I could even forget his need to take care of everything. Especially since I so frequently saw those traits in myself. There are so many similarities between us, and yet we are still worlds apart.
I would never fit into his life of high-profile society. Not that he spent much time there anyway. I knew what the real gossip was about. How someone like me could snatch someone like Zachary Hawthorne out from under the nose of a beautiful blonde heiress. It was unheard of, and just one more reminder that we were never destined for one another.
It doesn’t make it hurt any less.
There’s a knock at the door, and I get up to answer it.
The neighbors have been bringing by plates of food all week as if my mother were dead instead of recovering. I guess this way she can enjoy the support of the community around her.
I open the door, and my heart stops.
Zach is on my front porch, here, in front of me. This isn’t a vision, nor a dream. I’m really seeing him here.
He holds up a small carton of rocky road ice cream. “I figured you could maybe use some of this.”
“How did you…” I swivel around to see Lyndsey, whose head is so far craned around the corner in the living room she looks like a giraffe grazing. When she catches my stare, she quickly retreats into the other room, innocently whistling to herself as if she had nothing to do with this.
I turn back to face Zach. Every part of my body longs to wrap myself against him. He looks warm and sturdy. He represents home to me in so many ways that don’t make sense. Seeing him again, nothing else seems to matter.
Instinctively, I curl into him. His arms fold about me, and I am lost in the safety of his embrace. Nothing can harm me here. Nothing matters here when I am with him.
“Haven’t you done enough already?” I ask again
st his chest.
He just paid a hundred thousand in medical bills, now he wants to bribe me with ice cream? Not necessary, but not unappreciated.
He clears his throat. “Ah. I see you’ve spoken to the hospital.”
I release him and let him pass by me to enter the house. “It’s too much. You shouldn’t have done that.”
“Yes, I should have.” He scans the kitchen for the refrigerator and places the ice cream in the freezer. “You’re taking on too much, Aly. You need to accept help every now and then.”
“I could have taken care of it myself.”
He peers down at me.
The thoughtfulness in his gaze rakes over me in warm, wonderful pleasure. He closes his eyes briefly, sighing. “That’s not the point, Aly. Yes, you can take care of things on your own. But that doesn’t mean you should. You’ve spent so much of your life being the adult, being the one who takes care of everyone in your life, that you don’t know how to simply enjoy something for yourself for a change.”
“So what am I supposed to do?” I ask. “What am I supposed to work toward now?”
His eyes narrow, confused. “What you’ve been working toward. Getting your organization up and running.”
“I need funding for that.”
“You have it. At least part of it,” he explains. “Marianne just confirmed it this morning. All the paperwork has already been drawn up for the business, we just need to wait for its approval as a non-profit.”
“And what about volunteers?” Even as I’m saying it, I realize how foolish it sounds.
Zach smiles. “Well, I happen to know a guy. He might even be persuaded to teach you a few things in the process.”
“Really?” I tease. “He sounds great. When do I get to meet him?”
A low grumble ripples through Zach’s throat. His hand grips me by the waist and tugs me up against him. “I’ll see what his availability looks like. His schedule just recently opened up, so it shouldn’t be a problem.”
I laugh. “I see.”
His eyes fall to my lips, and I struggle to grasp my breath. Every doubt in my mind that this man is meant for me fades away beneath his embrace. “I don’t want to do it all for you, Aly. I promise I’ll only offer as much help as you need. But I also won’t promise to sit back and let you take it all upon yourself. We do this together. Whatever we do, I just want to do it with you.”
“Okay.” My smile widens uncontrollably. “It’s a deal.”
He inclines his head closer to me. “So, do we shake on it?”
“I have a better idea.” I loop my arms around his neck and draw his lips down over mine. The moment our mouths meet, I know this is where I want to spend the rest of my life. Tucked away in this man’s embrace, falling into the endless longing of his gaze.
“Aly, I love you,” he whispers against my mouth.
I nearly crumble hearing the words. I’m already so weak, losing all feeling in my body, that the only thing supporting me at this moment are his arms around me. Then he delivers a blow like that to my system. How am I ever supposed to recover?
“Zach, I…”
I love you. But this will never work.
I pull away, still in his arms but far enough to keep my head clear. “We come from two completely different worlds. I don’t belong in the social sphere with investors and multi-millionaires, or blonde goddesses who look like they’ve been plucked straight out of a magazine.”
His eyes soften, and he inclines his head toward mine. “Neither do I. Just say the word, and it will never be a part of lives again.”
“You can’t change who you are. Even if you never go to another party, won’t they track you down? Check in on you?”
A laugh ripples through his chest.
The smile on his lips kindles a series of wicked thoughts I quickly fight back. “It’s the media, Aly. Not convicted criminals I sold out to the feds. Besides, you’ve already started your own networking with powerful business figureheads.”
His words surprise me. Haven’t I been networking with rich millionaires interested in supporting my organization? Isn’t that what Marianne has been prepping me for all this time? I’ve already been learning how to navigate through his world, how to manage conversations with powerful people who can make or break my dreams for the future. If I can do this for a charity I’m passionate about, shouldn’t I be able to do this for the man I love?
“You belong in this world as much as anyone does,” Zach adds. “You belong with me.”
I nod, suddenly finding the strength and confidence within myself to take what I want.
I deserve this life. I deserve all the things I’ve worked for years to have.
What’s more, I deserve a love with this man.
“I love you, Zach,” I say finally. “I don’t ever want to be apart from you again.”
“Then marry me.”
I freeze. I couldn’t have heard him right. “What?”
He notes my hesitation and pulls back to hold my gaze. “We can have a long engagement if you’re worried about us moving too fast. But there isn’t a doubt in my mind that this is what I want. I want you, Aly. Forever.”
He wants to marry me.
Me, Aly McKenzie, the little workaholic from Home Depot finally gets to ride off into the sunset with her prince charming.
I get everything I could ever hope for, and it’s all thanks to this man.
“So what do you say?”
“Yes,” I answer, my heart bursting.
“I’m yours. Forever, yours.”
Epilogue
One Year Later
“What do you mean, ‘you can’t find the rings’?”
Marianne twists at the hip to look over her shoulder at me. She grins, the cellphone still pressed against her ear. “Everything’s fine, dear. Nothing to worry about.”
Marianne twirls back forward, yanking the long flowing skirts of her bridesmaid’s dress along with her for dramatic emphasis. Or maybe it’s the only way to subtly relieve the obvious anger taking hold of her now. She whispers a few hushed curse words and something about Derek’s mother before hanging up the phone.
When she turns back around to face us, only her famous, glittering smile remains. “Everything’s fine. Derek’s handling a little bump in the road, but nothing to worry about.”
“Do they need help?” Lyndsey asks and straightens the train on my gown.
They continue their conversation, but I’m a million miles away.
I’m not worried about missing rings or botched bouquets. So long as Zach is waiting for me at the end of the aisle, nothing could possibly ruin this day for me. I don’t need a ring or a ceremony to tell me I’m Zach’s wife. We could have eloped to Vegas for all I care. I’m just glad to make it official, before everyone we love.
Finally.
Dr. and Mrs. Hawthorne. Mrs. Aly Hawthorne.
The words sink into my soul like a prayer.
This is everything I could have ever hoped for, everything I could never have imagined I deserved. And yet, I could not imagine my life any other way than it is now.
Here I am. Standing in my wedding gown, ready to face the crowd of people outside. The rows and rows of guests that I barely know, except for the stray, distant relative. That’s not true. I know the contributors and workers for our business. The one we’ve poured our blood, sweat and tears into over the past year. Every sacrifice is completely worth the cost.
And of course, I know most of Zach’s close friends and family by now.
His mom and her new husband have even been staying with us for the past two weeks, just to help with any final arrangements and potential mishaps. It’s been a revolving door of family members and welcomes. A never-ending line of handshakes and hugs.
This wedding isn’t a single-day event for his family. It’s a weeklong celebration. So I’ve had plenty of time to get to know everyone.
Surprisingly, it doesn’t ease the sting of walking out there. His mother
convinced us to allow one camera crew to film the ceremony. It was good for the business she said, giving it the exposure it needs to expand. Only the most trusted reporter in her PR arsenal survived the blitz on all publicity. But after everything that happened when Jackson leaked the photo of us to the press a year ago, you can’t blame a girl for being a little wary to trust the media a second time.
There are times I wonder if I’ll ever fit into this lifestyle. Even Zach seems untouched by it all. He’s so real and down-to-earth, I sometimes forget he’s worth billions. He certainly doesn’t act it when he’s with our patients. To him, it doesn’t matter where his clients come from or what their situations may be. When they talk, they are equals.
And I fall in love with him all over again.
“Peter Robinson is here, Aly,” Marianne says, snapping me out of my trance. “That’s a good sign.”
Peter Robinson. One of our clients. Poor man barely ever leaves his house, let alone attends an event like this. Hell, even I’m terrified to walk out onto that lawn. All eyes are going to be on me. I can just imagine what they are going to be thinking.
“Of course he’s here.” Lyndsey grabs my veil from off the chair. “He loves Aly. You’re like the daughter he never had. Or maybe you’re the daughter he soon will have.”
I spin around to face Lyndsey, my mouth falling open.
“Oh, come on.” She laughs, rolling a shoulder forward. “You must have seen how he and your mom get along with one another. They are adorable.”
Marianne nods. “It’s true. It’s good to have someone who understands what you’re going through. Peter barely left his bed for the first three months after his wife passed away. But since he met Nora at the support group, I’ve just seen a light shine in him again. Nora too.”
I have to admit, it is something special. I never thought my mother would move on after all she’d been through. I never even thought she would be half as happy as she was now. She still has her bad days. But they have grown so far and few between since her stay in hospital that I’ve allowed myself to hope.
