by India Kells
“You mean our evil aunt. She’s like a snake and must be put down.” Sam’s focus was undeniable.
Something beeped on one of the computers and Kai took a quick look and smiled. “Well, our little nun is making good use of the office I’ve set up for her. If we’re lucky, she’ll stop this madness sooner than later.”
All brothers nodded, but Archer didn’t seem as confident. “That is, if she doesn’t bail on us again.”
The doubt in his brother’s voice made Liam growl. “Don’t you dare, Archer. You know why she fled, but she’s here now. She’s one of us.”
It was difficult to gain back the control that was almost let lose at Archer’s veiled doubts about Catriona.
Aleksei was clearly on Liam’s side concerning the nun, and Kai only smiled and shook his head. Surprisingly, it was Sam who acted as referee.
“Easy, brothers. I trust Liam’s judgment on this, and from what I was told, Catriona isn’t trying to deceive us. One of us would’ve detected it if she were.”
The simple words offered in Sam’s calm voice finished defusing the situation. Archer sighed and gave Liam a quick nod, confirming they were on the same side.
Kai sat back down on the computer chair and twirled a couple of times before grinning at Liam like a fool. “So, brother. What are your intentions with the nun? Are you going to make God angry with you or not?”
Annoyance flared, but he knew that behind Kai’s amusement was a real concern. “I... She …” Liam clenched his teeth, trying to find the right words. “I don’t know what to do, to be honest.”
Sam came to his side and frowned. “What do you mean? She’s a nun. There’s nothing to do.”
“She keeps telling me she’s not one yet, and there’s something between us. So far, I’ve kept away, but she’s offered herself to me.”
“And now it’s in your hands, Liam.”
Kai's statement weighed heavily on him. The more he knew Catriona Walsh, the more he was attracted to her, not only to her light, but her body. A big part of him wanted to gorge himself on her, starving for her willing softness, hopeful of erasing his own darkness by her hands.
But could he taint that sweet soul of hers for a moment of pleasure?
Aleksei poked him with his elbow, pulling him out of his thoughts. “Your poker face has slipped, Liam. I recognize the same need I have for Deva. The decision is yours, but I saw how she looked at you. There was no doubt in her, so when she offered herself, it was a clear decision.” The Russian darkened for a moment. “We all know how peace is rare. We never know when the next one might be, if it ever comes.”
Gravity filled the room as they reflected on Aleksei’s words. Each of them had different lives, but the scars were painfully similar.
After a moment, Kai came forward. “Whatever you do, keep in mind that we need her help, now more than ever. This situation is temporary. We won’t be able to keep Finch at bay forever.”
It may not have been a warning, but Liam took it as one, nonetheless.
Agreeing silently, Liam nodded. One look through the windows made him realize that it was snowing, and that they were a day closer to the holidays. Immediately, Catriona’s image surrounded by Christmas lights in Chicago sprang to mind.
“Have we planned anything for Christmas while we’re in lockdown?”
Archer rolled his eyes. “Zoe and Deva cornered me about it. It took some doing to order everything, making sure nothing could lead him back to us. I told the guards that we’re expecting a delivery soon. So prepare yourself to be blinded by ornaments and sparkly things. I’ve also been told participation is mandatory on Christmas Day, do that leaves you tonight free.”
On that note, Liam left his brothers, who were still debating the security, and his feet led him toward the wing where Lazarus had been installed.
Liam needed to see the man who had brought them all together against Finch.
The suite was vast but cozy, lit by the slowly declining daylight. Lazarus lay still as a statue in the bed. What Liam noticed was there were only two machines attached to his brother, a real improvement compared to the hospital. Sasha was nowhere to be seen and was most probably in her bedroom through the en-suite on the side. The dedicated doctor was never gone for long, so Liam pulled a chair by Lazarus’ bed and sat down, elbows on his knees.
Maybe it was only a trick of his mind, but Lazarus’ cheeks seemed pinker against the black of his beard. That was a positive sign, right? Liam rubbed the back of his neck, his gaze going over the room before returning to his brother.
“We’re such a deep mess, Oz. Shit.” It was weird to talk to someone who couldn’t answer back, but at the same time, it felt right. “We’re in hiding and everything is on the shoulders of a nun.” After a pause, Liam chuckled. “Have you meet Catriona? Well, I mean before you went into a coma and she came to your hospital room. There’s something about her. I noticed it the first moment I saw her. It’s difficult to explain, you know.”
As the words flowed, images of Catriona filled his mind, and his body tightened. “It’s impossible to stay away from her, as if she welcomes everyone even closer with her smile. There’s a purity when she looks at me, and there’s nothing pure about how much I want her. I feel like the devil around her. It's true the image is bad, but it takes everything in me to stay away. Twice I almost succumbed, twice she was saved. Do you know she willingly offered herself to me? Crazy angel.” Saying the words out loud in the open sounded so weird, it made him shake his head. “You are aware I can’t. I won’t do it. She doesn’t see what it could do to her. I know firsthand how a broken vow can hurt someone. You have learned about my mother, Oz. Whether I want her or not, she has to understand the implications. I won’t survive breaking her soul.”
“I hate when men assume they can read a woman’s mind. Even worse, when they decide what’s best for them. Please, give Catriona some credit, even if I think she could do way better than you.”
The female voice behind him almost made him swallow his tongue.
“I thought you were in your room, doc.”
Sasha came around with a tray before settling on the other side of the bed, placing the tray on the floor. “And you dare comment on my routine, you’re living dangerously, Liam.”
He leaned back on his chair, lifting his palms. “And you’re listening in on private conversations.”
Undeterred, Sasha took a mug in one hand and a sandwich in another before locking eyes with him. “Don’t worry, inside these walls, I consider doctor-patient confidentiality to be ongoing. Hell, I think it has been since I first met you guys.”
With a derisive snort, Liam exhaled and looked at Lazarus. “How’s he doing?”
Sasha took a bite and chewed for an instant before answering. “To my utter amazement, so much better. I’ve never had a patient in a coma recover so fast from infection and pneumonia. If I were a believer, I’d say it was a miracle.”
Some good news at last.
“Don’t tell the others because I may be mistaken, but I think he’s moving a bit more. It might be a sign that he’s slowly awakening.”
The emotion Liam felt clogging his throat prevented him from speaking, so he just nodded.
“What is far from a miracle is how blind you are concerning Catriona and how you let your past affect you.”
Anger rose, and he fought to keep it under control although it seeped into his tone. “You know nothing about me.”
At that, the beautiful doctor laughed. “I know the type of men you all are. Honorable, inflexible, and so lost in your sufferings that you can’t appreciate the good around you.”
Liam was stunned by her words, but all he could see on Sasha’s face was grave and sincere compassion. “You want to finish this fight alone, stop Finch on your own, while fighting that painful, inner war inside by yourself. Don’t you see that, from the beginning, your true guiding light has been outside yourself?”
Blinking, Liam wasn’t certain he understood
her words.
“Beatrice Dante and Gabrielle Thorne live deep in that underground world. Two women who have breathed and survived a world of danger, sided with Lazarus, and provided him with invaluable aces. Each of them forced your brothers to have another perspective, bringing you closer to your goal.”
The faces of Deva, Zoe, and Isabel came to mind. Liam had witnessed directly how they entered their initial circle and allowed Aleksei, Archer, and Kai to hope for more, something that each of them no longer considered a remote possibility.
“It’s not the same with Catriona. You can’t compare her with the others. She’s dedicated her life to God.”
“And she’s nothing like your mother. Finch raped your mom. Catriona is willingly offering herself to you. You said it yourself, you see a light in her, and she’s not only smart, she’s a brilliant woman who knows the consequences of her acts. The true question is if you’re willing to let go of your preconceived ideas and scars to go to her, or more importantly, if you want her to come to you.”
Liam let his head fall before looking at Sasha again. “You’re hard, doc.”
Her smile was sad. “Life had made me so. Catriona isn’t offering you a happily-ever-after ending, only the chance to share something with her. Don’t you want to experience true peace and connection, even for a single night? Don’t you yearn for it too?”
As all the resolutions he thought immovable in his mind crumbled into dust, making him hope again, Lazarus stirred a little and sighed.
If there was hope that Lazarus would open his eyes soon again, maybe, just maybe, Liam could let himself feel unbroken in Catriona’s arms, if only for a night.
Chapter Seventeen
Liam paced like a caged lion in his room. Despite the tempting possibility that had insinuated itself in his mind earlier, he wasn’t sure about it now that it became more tangible.
After leaving Lazarus’ bedroom, he had checked on the boys who were now camping in Lucas’ room. The three of them were thick as thieves, all excited to spend Christmas Eve playing games and anticipating next day’s fun. Liam was happy to see that, but he discreetly reminded Zoe’s young brother that the two kids had to eat and sleep, and not play video games all night or Santa Claus would undoubtedly put them on the naughty list. They promised even to take a shower and put on the pajamas Archer had purchased for them all so they could remain together for the time being. Cary told him that Catriona had checked on them twice already, and even brought them food between work.
Twice, Liam had walked past the room where Catriona had isolated herself and hesitated before going his way after checking on their security and helping Kai and Sam haul boxes inside the living room. From what he’d seen, they’d soon be drowning in Christmas decorations. Archer was expecting a fir tree in the morning.
Once everyone had retreated to their quarters, Liam didn’t have any other choice but to return to the suite he shared with Catriona.
Night had fallen, and it put even more pressure on his mind, and Catriona wasn’t back yet.
After taking a shower and lying on his bed, he turned on the TV in his room and started flipping the channels. Mindless chatter had a way of calming his mind and settling his body, a habit due to all the hours he’d spent in rehab for his leg. At the thought, he looked at it, and saw the scar above the joint. With a frown, he bent his knee. How long had it been since he’d felt pain radiating from it? How could the pain have vanished so suddenly?
It prompted the memory of Catriona massaging his flesh. His cock stirred, and he put his palm over it through the thin pajama pants. It would be so easy to let his fantasy about the little nun take over his mind. Could his lust be triggered by what he couldn’t have, or the trauma of his childhood? Was he that twisted?
With his palm lightly rubbing his length through the fabric, he told himself that it wouldn’t be the first-time filthy thoughts had taken over reason. After all, wasn’t he the son of a monster? Finch wouldn’t have waited for Catriona, like he didn’t with his own mother.
Heat overtook him as he couldn’t deny himself anymore and discarded his pants. Partly pushing his body against the headboard, his fingers circled his erection, unmoving for the moment, just enjoying the pressure. Pre-cum started oozing, but it wasn’t enough to lessen the friction, and he didn’t want quick pleasure. If he were to let his body go, he’d draw out the lust until his body screamed for release.
Liam imagined her returning to their suite, closing the door to her room, desperate for a shower before getting under the covers. In his mind, he saw her sit on the edge of the bed, removing her sensible, bland clothing, piece by piece. She may have believed it concealed her body, but not enough for him not to guess at her curves under the fabric.
She wasn’t like other women when she undressed in his mind; there was no sensual teasing or glances in his direction, no caresses as she tossed away each article of clothing. What turned him on like never before was how she revealed her pale skin to his gaze, unaware of her beauty.
His hand had started to move, excruciatingly slowly over his pulsing flesh when he heard the faint sound of someone entering the suite. Catriona.
Her movements weren’t silent, but soft, as if she avoided making noise. How could this angel of compassion and light be attracted to a man like him, who was at this exact moment jacking off with her in his mind? The situation aroused him even more, intensifying the sensations.
Keeping his eyes closed, only imagining what she was doing, Liam gathered the pre-cum seeping at his tip to accelerate his pace, unsure how long he’d last, but certain it would be explosive.
His brain swimming in desire, making it difficult to think straight, Liam didn’t hear the soft knock on his door through his labored breath and thumping in his ears, and only the feminine gasp made him realize he wasn’t lost in his fantasy anymore.
He opened his eyes to see Catriona, with a deer caught in the headlights look on her face. Unlike his fantasy, she was still dressed from neck to toe, her hand clutching the doorknob. The good guy in him wanted to stop and cover himself, but his evil side grinned. Maybe it was because he craved her body, or perhaps it was that overwhelming need for connection that intensified as soon as she appeared. If she were serious in her request for them to be together, everything was about to be played out right here and now.
His hand resumed stroking his erection harder than before, and he believed she’d started breathing again. Twice she opened her mouth as if to speak, twice she closed it and licked her luscious lips.
“If you want to keep your innocence, little nun, leave and close the door behind you. Last chance.” His voice was lower and more menacing than he’d expected, but it conveyed precisely how he felt now.
The door shut, all right, but Catriona remained inside the room. Civility was slipping through his fingers, being replaced by a hungry predator. Pushing himself from the bed, Liam stood gloriously naked before her, so close if she extended her arm, her fingers could touch his skin.
He should’ve warned her again, but he couldn’t speak, fighting the urge to take her right there and then. The stillness broke when she removed her shirt. Catriona’s gaze never wavered from his when she shed her pants. It was clear she was resolute in her decision, even if it mixed with fear and doubt. If he could think straight, he would’ve been fascinated by how faith animated her, but the animal in him was coiling, ready to satisfy his hunger.
In her simple white underwear, Catriona once more proved her courage, or her foolishness, and reached back to unclasp her bra. When her breasts were bare, her deep pink nipples taut under his gaze, he knew it was his point of no return.
Liam took another step and he crashed his mouth on hers. The kiss was laced with seduction and lust. As his hands circled her waist, a shiver shook her entire body. His tongue traced her lips before sliding in and out, a promise of what was to come.
This was a full-blown attack on the senses, his palms caressing her ribcage until he cupped her breasts.
The moan that came from Catriona spurred him on, and he abandoned the sweetness of her lips to take a delectable nipple between his teeth. As she arched back, Liam glanced at her face, and his angel was looking at him with genuine fascination and surprise. As he gently bit and licked, he glided a hand back down the swell of her hip toward her butt. Just as he reached the plump flesh, a soft hand caressed his shoulders. The little nun emboldened her touch and soon, the delicate digits traced his chest and tickled his abdomen before stroking the hard erection between them.
His body reacted, his hips pushing toward her in a silent plea. Catriona obeyed and Liam gasped when she loosely fisted him. It was apparent she needed to be guided. “Tighter, love. I won’t break. Harder.”
As she followed his command, blood surged in him, and her lips started kissing the offered skin of his shoulder. Abandoning her heaving breasts, he peppered a path with kisses back to her mouth.
There was nothing experienced in her hesitant and light touch, but she couldn’t more arouse him. Straightening, he forced himself to stand still as she explored his body.
Liam almost expected her to shy away from him as he towered over her, but again, she surprised him by leaning forward and pressing her lips between his pectorals. The touch could’ve been tender if she hadn’t licked his skin in the process. Not only had she tasted him, but her hands resumed their exploration.
Caught in the sweetest torture, he couldn’t detach his gaze from the beautiful woman lavishing his body. There was no calculation in her, nor fear or disgust on her face. The more she explored him, the more he could see the excitement in her; she relaxed more, and there was a tell-tale flush on her chest and cheeks.
Power flooded over him, his attention split between indulging in the pleasure she was giving him and turning the tables on her.
His inner debate screeched to a halt when Catriona fell to her knees, her sweet lips but a hair’s breadth from his aching cock. Probably stunned by her boldness, she peeked up.
