But now as I think about it, something makes me believe that Liora did try the spell. I seem to feel a certain residual determination and resignation from her, as if she had accepted that she was a liability and knew the only solution was to sacrifice herself.
So... The Amazèa are dead, Anastasia is obviously a very powerful witch, and Liora was willing to make the sacrifice.
Why didn’t it work?
I stare out at the churning sea, wondering what it all means. For so long I was convinced that killing the Amazèa would change things. We both were. But obviously it hasn’t. Liora and I are still split, and that means we are still in danger. As long as she can handle the Boumeaux and enter Thiberoux she’ll be a huge target for the Light-angels. We’ll never be safe, even from other demons who wish to harm her to get to me.
Suddenly, a horrible thought flashes through my mind – one too terrible to even consider.
No… that can’t be…
“Lucky, what is it? Are you okay?”
I jump to my feet and shake my head, frantic to escape my thoughts.
Vincent gets up and puts his hand on my arm. “Lucky, what is it?” he asks again. “What’s wrong?”
I stop and look at him. I can’t even answer – afraid that merely speaking the crazy possibility will somehow make it true.
Because it can’t be right.
Yet somehow, deep inside, I know it is.
Oh, Hell. How could I have been so blind?
“Lucky, what is it? Tell me!” I hear the concern in Vincent’s voice, and my eyes fill with tears.
My lips quiver as I take a deep breath.
“It’s me,” I whisper.
“What? What’s you?”
I stare at him, my eyes wide. “It’s me. I’m the one who has to go. I’m the cause of all of this…”
He frowns and takes my hand. “What are you talking about?”
I take another deep breath. Then I pull my hand away and walk toward the edge of the cliff. I stare out at the eternal abyss as the truth sinks in, deeper and deeper. Everything is clear now. It all makes sense. My blinders are finally off, and I realize just how wrong I’ve been.
Vincent comes and stands beside me.
“It’s me.” I say the words so quietly I can barely hear them myself. “I’m the curse. It’s my existence that is causing all this turmoil and has thrown everything off balance. Think about it. Liora is only in danger because of me. Of who and what I am. As a normal human girl she faces no threat from Light-angels. Zero. And very little from other demons. Certainly less than she does now.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying—” My voice breaks again, and I have to take another deep breath to steady myself. “I’m saying that I’ve been looking at this all wrong. I kept thinking that she was the weak one, the one that made my life so unbearable. But in reality, I’m the one doing it to her… and I’m worse, because I put everyone else in danger too. Kayla and Michael—”
A sob escapes my throat, and Vincent gives my hand a reassuring squeeze.
“—They died because of me. The Amazèa had come for me that day. I’d used my powers and they must’ve been in the area and sensed it. I fought them off at first, but knew I couldn’t beat them. So I ran and hid to save myself, and they killed Kayla and Michael instead. That’s why they died. That’s why the split happened.”
Vincent shakes his head, his mouth firm. “Well, that may explain why you had the curse in the first place, but it doesn’t explain why you think you have to go away now. Why you’re the cause of these problems—”
“Don’t you see? My being a demon is what gets us in trouble. If I go, and Liora is just a regular human girl, then this all ends. Demons are only after me, and as a normal human she’ll be useless to the Light-angels. If the demon in her dies… if I die… then these problems go away. Otherwise… otherwise we’ll be in this purgatory of constant danger forever, or until we and everyone else we love dies. I am the reason for all this suffering, not Liora. And only I can end it.”
Vincent stares at me. He doesn’t argue, or tell me I’m totally wrong, or point out a different solution. He just looks at me quietly. And his silence breaks my heart.
“I’ve been alive for a long, long time,” he finally whispers. “And I’ve seen a lot of crazy, unbelievable things. I thought nothing could really shock or surprise me anymore, and that I had a lot of things figured out. But are you trying to say that you, as a demon, are considering possibly sacrificing your entire existence for the sake of others? For humans?”
I stare at him without blinking, then shake my head. “No, I’m not saying I’m going to possibly give up my existence in this world…”
I reach out and pull him to me, and surprise him by pressing my lips on his in a fiery, passionate kiss. He quickly recovers and returns in kind. His mouth melts against mine, and he runs his hands through my hair as I press my body closer to his. Then I break away and look him in the eyes.
“…I’m saying that I definitely am.”
I turn and run across the lawn before he can stop me, and before I can stop myself. And I hit Anastasia’s magical barrier full force. The electrical energy sends me flying backwards.
“Come out, Witch!” I scream as loud as I can. I struggle to stand, but my legs feel short-circuited and wobbly. So I stay seated on the cool grass and yell again, “Come out, Witch! Come and do what you’ve always wanted to do! Get rid of me once and for all!”
A moment later Anastasia appears, as if from thin air. One moment she’s not there, the next she’s standing by the rose bushes several feet away staring at me.
“What do you want, demon child?” Her voice carries across the night air.
“Did Liora really do the spell? The one to make her humanity disappear and leave only me?”
“Yes, she did.”
“So why didn’t it work? Why is she still here?”
“Only you can know the answer. And you do know the answer.”
“Because it’s me… I’m the one who has to die, right? It’s me who needs to make the ultimate sacrifice. All this time… she’s the one with the powers, the strength, the courage… I’m the liability, the weak one who throws everything into chaos and puts everyone’s life in peril, right?”
“Are you asking, or do you know?”
“Tell me! I need to know!” I pound my fist on the damp lawn.
“I cannot tell you your truth.”
“DO IT!” I scream. I struggle again to stand, but I can only get to my knees. “Do the spell on me. The real one. The one that works. Make the demon in us disappear entirely, and make us so we are only a human girl with no powers or anything. Make Lucky disappear!”
She moves closer to me, and I can see the sparkle of her eyes. “Is that what you really and truly want?”
Weeping, I cover my face and nod.
“Impressive. So my sister was right. She knew you’d figure out the truth and step up. I wasn’t quite as sure.”
I look up at her, my eyes drenched with tears. Tattie. I’ll never see her again.
But that’s a small price to pay for setting her free and keeping her safe.
Anastasia beckons me with a finger.
“Follow me.”
********
For the first time I enter Anastasia’s castle, but the magnificence of it is completely lost on me. As we walk up the stairs to the third floor, I know that each step I take is bringing me closer to my last. I’m amazed, though, at how happy I am about that. I’m not afraid. If anything, I welcome the thought of going to sleep and waking up somewhere with Bones and leaving this cursed existence behind me forever.
Anastasia pauses briefly outside a narrow door. “Are you really sure you want to do this?”
I nod. “I’ve never been more sure about anything in my life.”
She looks at me solemnly and opens the door, and when I step inside I can’t help but gasp and stare in awe. The room is obviously
under a deep enchantment, and the power of its magic is abundantly clear. Candles float aimlessly beneath a clear night sky. High above us, the triple moons of Illyria hang side-by-side, casting a soft glow over the lush, mountainous landscape. I can see for miles it seems, and the scene is one that brings me great joy.
It is Dryndara. My home.
If there’s one place I’d want to be at the end of my life, other than with Tatiana or in Bones’s arms, it would be here. Fresh tears spring to my eyes as I soak up the magnificent surroundings. I know this isn’t real. But right now it’s enough.
Anastasia points to a large pentagram on the floor. “Sit there.”
I take a deep breath and oblige her, sitting cross-legged in the middle of the star. She walks around the outside of it, setting a black candle on each of the symbol’s five points. She turns to me. “Tell me exactly why you are here,” she says.
I gulp. Is it my imagination or did the room suddenly get darker? I glance up and see that the three moons above me have dimmed considerably. I take another steadying breath.
“I want you to rid this body of its demon,” I begin. “I want you to send me, ‘Lucky’, wherever it is I’m supposed to go. Because it sure as hell isn’t here. I want you to make this body be human and give it to Liora. I want my existence, my personality, my spirit… whatever it is… to be sent where I can be with Bones forever, and we can have the life together we were destined to have.”
Anastasia nods. She turns and picks up a golden box, and retrieves from it what looks to be a diamond the size of a small grapefruit. Then she fixes her eyes on me, as the diamond begins to glow. “You must relinquish your ties between this world and that of Demonia. You have a link, a very powerful connection you wear as a talisman.”
“You mean this?” I retrieve my Boumeaux from beneath my tank top and hold it up. Somehow it makes perfect sense.
Bones had placed the onyx stone around my neck when I was a young demion, and had told me how it would be the most important thing I could ever hope to possess. For not only would it grant me access to my ancestral home of Thiberoux, it would also serve as a warning against danger from our most mortal enemies, the Light-angels. Having the bloodline of demonia angelis gave me the ability to touch this stone and bear its great powers. Others, humans and Light-angels alike, would turn to ash.
“You must destroy it.”
I close my eyes. This is all becoming too real. Can I actually go through with it?
But I have no choice. There is no other way. Now is the time to end it.
With a trembling hand I gently take off my necklace. I hold the stone in my palm and give it a final kiss. Then I lay it down beside me.
“Okay, I’m ready. Do it. Hurry,” I whisper, fighting to hold back the tears.
Anastasia hands me the glowing diamond, and the room grows suddenly dark.
One by one, the candles around me ignite, as Anastasia again walks around the pentagram, chanting softly. I take several deep breaths to steady my nerves. But my blood is on fire, and I’m screaming inside. All my most passionate emotions… my anger and guilt, my jealousies, fears and resentments… all rise to the surface in this very moment.
The room begins to spin, and my heart is pounding in my ears. I can’t breathe. Suddenly I’m more afraid than I’ve ever been in my whole life. Ever. What if this is it? What if there is no ‘next’? Anastasia’s chanting becomes faster, more frenzied, and the flames on the candles burn higher.
I feel more and more terrified, as I begin to gasp for air. I’m almost ready to jump from the pentagram, when Anastasia stops circling and commands, “Now!”
With a blood curdling scream, releasing years of torment, I slam the diamond against my Boumeaux with every ounce of power I possess.
Chapter 35.
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Chapter 36.
Slowly I open my eyes. I feel like I’m awakening from a long, deep, deep slumber. It takes me a moment to realize where I am, and a few more to convince myself I’m not dreaming.
I’m on my bed, in my room, at the cabin in the woods. And there, sitting on a rocking chair in the corner, is Tatiana. The late afternoon sun streams through the window pane, catching speckles of dust as they float in the air.
But how…?
“Hello, sweetheart.” Tatiana beams. “I’m very happy to have you back. How are you feeling?”
I sit up and shake my head, confused. Last thing I remember, I was going into some strange room in Anastasia’s house. What happened? How did I end up here?
“Did the spell not work?” I croak. My throat is scratchy and raw, and my voice sounds funny. Different.
“You tell me,” Tat replies.
I close my eyes and shake my head again. Everything is a blurry mess. “How long was I asleep?” I ask, looking at her again.
She gives me a cryptic smile. “A very long time.”
I glance around my room. “How did I get here?”
“I do believe your friend is a teleporter. He and the others have been patiently waiting for you to come around.”
I blink slowly several times and stare at her. “Am I really here?” I whisper. “Or am I actually dead and dreaming?”
Tatiana rises and comes over to take a seat on the bed. She places a soft hand on my cheek.
“You are really here, sweetheart. And I do believe you are more alive than ever.”
My heart swells, and I catch my breath. She is real. I’m not imagining it.
I spot a glass
of water on the nightstand and chug it down eagerly. The liquid feels strange, but good.
“I feel weird,” I mumble.
Then a memory flashes through my mind. I gasp and grab at my chest in panic.
Whew! Good… must’ve just been a bad dream.
Tatiana is looking at me intently. “What is your name?”
I chuckle. “What is my name? Is that a joke?”
She tilts her head. “Are you the human child we call Liora?”
“Yes, you know I am. Why are you even asking me that?” Maybe she’s the one who’s confused?
Tatiana takes a deep breath. “Are you the demon child we call Lucky?”
“Of course I am. What a silly question. Who else would—?”
My eyes open wide and I gasp again, covering my mouth with my hand.
She is me. And I am her.
I struggle to catch my breath, as chills race up and down my body. Suddenly, a barrage of memories flood through my brain, like thousands of movies all playing at the same time.
“Oh, my God! Oh, my God!” I cry out.
Tatiana quickly puts her frail arms around me. “You’re okay. Just stay strong. Let it happen.”
Tears flood down my face, and I struggle to breathe as everything falls into place like an enormous explosion in reverse. Liora’s life— all of her feelings… hopes… fears…, merging with Lucky’s powers… her knowledge… her strengths…
I place my hand over my belly. “My babies!”
Tatiana’s face softens into a smile. “Strongest I’ve ever felt. Just like their mother.”
I put my arms around her now, sobbing openly. Everything suddenly feels so surreal… so different.
Yet, at the same time, exactly the same.
“How… h-how did this happen? I thought… I thought I was gone… I was going to let myself die!”
“You each sacrificed yourself so that your other half could live. And in doing so, you were able to survive. The only thing keeping you apart all this time was you. Once you forgave yourself, all of yourself, and accepted who and what you are, for better or worse… when you stopped hating yourself and began loving yourself instead, your soul was finally able to heal.”
The Complete Demonblood Saga Page 69