• • •
I blink a few times at Helios’s brightness overhead, and as my vision adjusts, I realize it’s a ceiling light.
I’m lying on a bed, my heart racing like I’m still being chased. An incessant beeping in tune with my pulse comes into focus, and when at last my breaths start to slow, so do the mechanical chirps.
I look down to see clear tubes sticking out of my arms, and my vitals flashing across floating holographic screens. I’m in a hospital.
I raise my hands slowly, and my body feels heavy and sore, like I haven’t left this bed in weeks. I scan the empty room expecting to see someone. Someone important—only I can’t remember whom.
There’s one window in the small space, and it shows a dark, starless sky. My muscles are leaden, but I need to know what’s happened. Where I am. Who survived.
I gradually remove every needle from my veins, and I hug the armrest to pull myself up.
As my feet drop to the icy floor, oblivion beckons in my mind, and the world grows dark for a few beats. I rest my forehead on the bed, and when I feel steadier, I straighten my crinkly white hospital gown and slowly manage to shuffle out of the room.
Even though the shadowy hallway is empty, a prickle of unease climbs up the back of my neck, and I get the sense I’m being watched. Voices murmur somewhere nearby, and I use the metal handrail along the wall to hold myself upright as I walk in the sound’s direction.
“Don’t know what we’ll do if she doesn’t wake up soon.”
Hysan.
Relief floods through me, heating my skin, and I move as swiftly as my weakened muscles can carry me. My pulse quickens as soon as I spy his golden head through the partly open doorway of an unoccupied hospital room.
But I freeze when I see who’s with him.
“You look exhausted,” says a statuesque Ariean with flawless bronze brown skin and long cat eyes. Skarlet Thorne.
“That’s because I am exhausted,” he says, and the heavy exhale that follows settles like a physical weight on my heart.
“All we needed was for her to be the face of our movement,” he continues, and there’s a lack of sunlight in his voice that makes me flash to the half-dark Helios from the Cathedral. “We had everything else covered—the strategizing, the fighting—but still she couldn’t help herself. And now the whole Zodiac is at risk just because Rho couldn’t handle her emotions.”
My jaw drops, and my chest hollows, like I’m being drained of every good emotion I’ve ever felt.
“I can distract you from all that,” purrs Skarlet, moving in until she’s too close to him. “I missed you last night.”
Air hitches in my throat as her lips trail up his neck to his ear, and she says something that sounds like, “Come tonight.”
My heart holds its beat until Hysan answers.
“As you wish.”
I cover my mouth so they won’t hear my gasp, and I hear her say, “What if your princess wakes up and discovers us?”
“Rho’s the most trusting person in the Zodiac,” says Hysan, and in the dim lighting his centaur smile looks more like a cruel sneer. “She won’t suspect a thing. And if she does, all it takes is a little sweet talking, and she’s mine again.”
I squeeze my eyes shut and rub my temples, desperately hoping I’m just hallucinating from whatever drugs they’ve pumped into me. Then I look again, just in time to see Hysan pressing up against Skarlet.
“How about showing me what I missed last night?” he asks huskily, grabbing her by the waist and pushing her onto the countertop.
I turn away as their mouths come together, and then I bury my face in the wall and try to swallow the impulse to cry—but when I hear Skarlet’s soft moans, I muster every lingering store of strength within me and force myself to keep moving.
If I’m going to die, I want it to be as far from this room as possible.
I don’t slow down until I’ve made myself nauseous. I knew Hysan wasn’t trustworthy. I should have heeded my brain’s warnings. I should have trusted my fears all along.
The sense that I’m being watched settles over me again, and I push past my pain so I can focus on finding the others. Mathias, Brynda, and Rubi can’t be far, and I need to know where I am and how much time has passed.
A flash of blond hair flickers around a corner, and I speed up. “Wait!” I call out, my voice scratchy and unused. “Wait for me!”
The woman turns around, and when I see her face, I try to call for help—but my throat is too dry to make a sound.
“The stars must like me more than I thought,” she says in the reptilian voice I remember as she raises a pistol to my chest.
She’s me, and she’s not. . . . Even on her Cancrian face, Corinthe’s smile is still leering.
She takes a step toward me, and I will my legs to move, but my muscles are leaden, my body betraying me. Broken chains dangle from the metal cuffs on her wrists, and I realize she’s escaped custody just as the pistol slams into my head.
2
WHEN I COME TO, I’M in a different dim hospital room, and I’m tied to a chair. Just like I was on Equinox.
My heart revs with adrenaline, and I struggle against the chains to free myself. I stop when I see Corinthe’s face leaning into mine.
She’s sitting beside me holding a jagged knife.
“Didn’t want to start the girl talk until you were awake to enjoy it.” Her voice is almost gentle.
She presses the sharp blade to my gown’s neckline and cuts down along the crinkly fabric until my chest is bare. “I thought we’d go with a different design today,” she whispers, bringing the icy metal up to my throat.
I cry out as pain explodes through me. The knife punctures my skin and slices from my neck to my collarbone, and I start gasping for air.
“Rising into your House has turned me into a romantic,” she croons as I suck in ragged inhales and try to fill my lungs.
“When I’m finished, you and your Guide will have matching scars . . . and if that’s not a sign of fated love, what is?”
My breathing is labored and high pitched as she carves down the rungs of my ribcage and reaches my stomach. I can’t scream or blink or fight. I’m frozen in my torment, my vision blurry, my thoughts swimming, the agony so complete and overwhelming that even if I survive, I know I’m not coming back from this.
“So quiet today, Rho. . . . Aren’t you going to tell me how I’m a victim?” She pushes the blade so deep into my gut that my neck swings forward, and I vomit on my lap.
“Aren’t you going to tell me how you still plan to plead for the acceptance of Risers?” she hisses in my ear as I hack up my insides. “How I can hurt you all I want, but you’ll still forgive me?”
And even if I could speak, I know I couldn’t say that.
Because if somehow I live through this, I’m going to kill Corinthe myself.
The door abruptly bursts open, and she leaps back as Mathias storms into the room with a dozen armed Lodestars. “Arrest her!” he booms, pointing to Corinthe, who’s backed up against the wall but holding her bloodied knife out threateningly as the Zodai close in around her.
Mathias darts over and immediately starts undoing my bonds, his square shoulders blocking everything else from view. “I’m so sorry, Rho. This wasn’t supposed to happen.”
As soon as my hands are free, I pull both halves of my gown together to cover the cuts on my chest. But when I look into his soft midnight eyes, I know he’s already seen them. We wear the same scars now.
Before Mathias can say anything, Hysan barges into the room. “What’s happened?” he demands.
“Corinthe escaped, but she’s been captured, and the asset has been recovered,” says Mathias, standing ramrod straight and saluting Hysan.
Asset?
When Hysan’s eyes land on mine, his face splits into
a sun-filled smile that cuts right through the bags under his eyes and the worry lines on his forehead. His green gaze brightens as he takes my limp hand in his warm one, and even though I know better now, my skin still buzzes from his touch.
“I missed you,” he whispers, leaning in and pressing a velvety kiss on my lips.
His concerned boyfriend act is so convincing that I wonder whether I made up the conversation between him and Skarlet. Then I look closer, and I notice the faded red lipstick on his chin and the crescent nail marks on his neck, and I know I’m not crazy.
“Get away from me,” I snap, scrambling toward Mathias. I look up at him and say, “Mathias, please, take me away from here. I don’t want to be anywhere near Hysan.”
But Mathias doesn’t meet my gaze. He’s assumed his unshakable Zodai stance.
“He doesn’t answer to you anymore,” says Hysan, the gentleness gone from his voice. “Mathias is loyal to your heart, and you gave your heart to me. You’re both mine now.”
I shake my head and grip Mathias’s arms to try to force him to look at me. “Mathias—please—snap out of it!”
His blue eyes finally roll down to meet mine, but his irises are now as hard as stone. “You made your choice, Rho.”
“Don’t do this!”
My plea goes ignored as a couple of Lodestars cuff my wrists and forcefully march me up to Hysan. “Time to deliver on all your promises,” he whispers as he leisurely runs a finger along my jawline. “You wanted to die for the Zodiac, didn’t you? I’m happy to report that after so many failed suicide missions, the stars have finally judged you worthy of a martyr’s death.”
Our faces are inches apart, and yet I feel no warmth radiating from his golden skin. His sunny glow never looked so artificial.
“Congratulations, my lady,” he huskily breathes into my lips. “You earned it.”
Mathias comes up beside us, and Hysan turns to him. “After all she put you through, you deserve this more than I do.”
“Thank you,” says Mathias, bowing his head, “but this is your right as much as mine.”
Hysan unsheathes his ceremonial dagger. “Together then?”
Mathias nods and holds up Corinthe’s bloodied blade—then they turn and plunge their weapons into me.
“NO!”
I blink, and Hysan and Mathias are gone.
I’m still tied to the chair.
“Welcome back,” croaks Corinthe. Her savage and unhinged smile comes into focus, and I look down to see she’s slicing lines across my abdomen.
My shredded white gown is patterned with splotches of red blood. “What’s happening to me?” I manage to ask, my voice barely more than a breath.
“What do you think?” she asks. “You failed. And now you’re dying.”
Her blade digs in too far, and my eyes roll back, only this time I don’t lose consciousness—I feel my soul floating up from my body and rising to the astral plane, like I’m deeply Centered.
The molecules of air around me transform into the slipstream where I first met Ochus, and I feel a wintry wind of warning before his monstrous form materializes.
I endured torture for an eternity, he booms, hurling his words like hailstones, and you can’t even handle a few nightmares? You are weak—no wonder you failed the Houses.
I—I don’t understand what’s happening, I stammer, his frigid Psynergy burning against my open wounds. Help me, please! I need to get out of here. I need to get back to where my friends are, I have to rescue Nishi—
You are not listening—you are too late, crab! he thunders at me. The Zodiac is gone.
It—it can’t be—
What do you think is happening to you? he demands, his Psynergy wrapping around me like a hurricane, sending chills through my body. You have joined me in the astral plane. Our destinies were always linked, child, and now we are doomed to face forever what we destroyed.
But I—I didn’t do anything—
You played right into the master’s hands. The right leader would have stopped him, but you are rash, foolish, fearful—what hope was there ever that you could go up against a star and win?
His icy hands close around my throat, and I’m infected with winter. Please! I beg him. Don’t—
But my veins ice over, freezing my blood, and I can’t suck in any oxygen. Spots obscure my vision as I suffocate, and I’m not sure if I’m horrified or relieved that it’s all ending.
I’m so tired of dying and reviving, dying and reviving, dying and reviving. . . . I’m ready for it to be over.
“Oh, but I’m not,” croaks Corinthe in my ear.
The pressure around my neck vanishes, as does the cold weather, and I blink my eyes open to find I’m back in my body. Only now I’m lying flat on my stomach.
My back is in scorching pain, like there are live flames licking my skin. “I can’t let you die before showing you how great these scars are turning out,” says Corinthe as she carves across my shoulder blades. Her breath burns my raw skin.
“Please,” I whisper, the fire in my body overwhelming. Water wells in my eyes, and pain presses into my mind. “Just . . . finish.”
She laughs softly, but there’s no mirth in the mousy sound. “I’ll never be finished,” she rasps in my ear. “You’ll never escape this place. You’ll always be here with me.”
Her blade stabs into my lower spine, and I arch up in a piercing scream. She pulls the knife out and stabs me with it again and again and again, until I can’t make any more sounds.
Then I hear a loud knocking.
My eyes fly open, and I gasp to find I’m no longer lying down. I’m standing upright in my dorm-pod on Elara and wearing my blue Acolyte uniform.
“WHAT THE HELIOS IS HAPPENING TO ME?!” I shout to the room.
The place looks exactly as it did when I saw it last—my bed is unmade, my desk is riddled with clothes I meant to put away, and a uniform identical to the one I’m wearing is draped across my chair from when I changed into my black space suit for our Drowning Diamonds concert.
Someone knocks on my door again.
I yank it open to find a trembling teen girl in a tattered blue uniform. Her knees are slightly bent, shoulders curved in, unkempt dark hair curtaining her features. She looks like she hasn’t bathed in months.
First I think she’s a new monster I’ve dreamt up.
Then I glimpse hints of her cinnamon face, and all my other fears fade from mattering.
“Nishi?”
3
FASTER THAN A BREATH, NISHI unsheathes a dagger and shoves me against the wall, pressing the blade under my chin.
“I’m not scared of you, demon,” she says in a guttural predator’s voice. “So do your worst.”
Since speaking means slitting my own throat, I stay completely still, not daring to even swallow. I just stare at the flickers of amber that shine through her matted clumps of black hair.
The terror in her eyes is so primal that she feels realer than the Hysan and Mathias I met in the hospital.
“Say something,” she suddenly commands, pulling the knife back slightly.
“I’m going to find you,” I say, my voice tight. “Imogen and Blaze took you away from me, but I swear I won’t rest until I—”
“Right, you’re risking your life to save mine, and now you’re going to make me feel like scum for the horrible things I said to you on Aquarius,” she says sharply, the dagger in her hand trembling. “And for joining the Tomorrow Party. And for getting Deke killed.”
A sob slips through her sharp-edged voice when she says his name. “Aren’t you going to tell me again how he—he was free, and his back was only turned because he was freeing me? How I should have been looking out for him—should have warned him—should have taken his place—”
“Nish—stop! I never said any of that because it’s n
ot true!” Tears leak from my eyes, and I wish my subconscious had generated a monstrous version of Nishi—like it did with Hysan and Mathias—instead of this broken, beaten girl.
“None of this is your fault,” I insist, and I don’t care if she stabs me with that blade anymore. I just can’t stand seeing her this way. “Please don’t think those things, Nish. I love you and will never stop searching for you—”
“Rho?”
I blink at the abrupt change in her tone. Her voice has dropped about a dozen decibels, and she sounds more fearful than furious.
“It’s me, Nish. I don’t know what’s happening or if any of this is real, but I’m trapped in some kind of nightmare. Everyone’s been awful to me, and—”
“Oh, my Helios, it’s you!”
Nishi throws the dagger aside and crushes me to her chest. We hug so tightly that I can’t breathe, but I don’t care. I’d rather die right here, clasped in the arms of my best friend, than anywhere else.
I hear her soft sobs in my ear, and soon I’m crying, too. When at last we let go of each other, we wipe our wet faces on our sleeves, and I shove the clutter off my bed so we can sit.
“How is any of this happening?” I ask.
“The Sumber.” Now that she’s not putting up a violent front, Nishi sounds much weaker than I first realized. “It took me a while to remember, but I finally figured it out,” she says, her hands trembling. “The gun Imogen pointed at me was a Sumber. She shot me, and then the nightmares started.” Even though she looks so different, it’s comforting to know she’s still the same quick study I remember.
“H—how long have we been here, Rho?”
I almost cringe at hearing her sound so brittle and breakable. And as I open my mouth to answer, I realize I have no idea how much time has passed.
“I’m not sure. . . . It feels like—”
“Forever,” she finishes for me, and I nod as our eyes meet. “Just try to focus,” she orders me, and I’m relieved to hear some of her bossy Nishiness coming back. “What can you remember before the nightmares?”
Thirteen Rising Page 2
