I feel you, sister. And I get the whole sleep thing, I do. I’d also not want to wake up if I felt all that pain, but Cass, you can’t just lay here unconscious for days. Poor Banner is about to lose his shit, and Lync won’t eat anything anyone tries to give him. Not even me! And we’re like best friends.
I giggle, rolling my mental eyes at the drama and let her know what I think of her hopping from friend to friend.
I thought Beeber was your besty. And me. And Banner.
Meh, I collect. I get to have more than one best, best buddy, and that makes me happy. As for you, I think Lync might think you’re his, you friend stealing bitch. So come on, wake up puppy and come put your males at ease. At least do something about Banner. He’s…not doing good.
I hate that. I don’t want anyone to be sad, but the harder I try to push forward through the darkness the more I feel like I’m falling back into it.
Don’t think I can, brain worm. It’s just too hard.
Stop calling me that. You’re scaring me. Now stop being such a baby and wake up. Wake up, Cass. You need to come back so we can figure out what’s wrong with you.
Brain worms. Oh sorry, that freaks you out. I think that scary werewolf, er dog, gave me rabies, or a disease.
He did not. Shifters don’t have rabies. We’re too evolved for that.
Huh?
Look, I’m gonna be real with you, okay? The guy who bit you—
Gregor.
Yeah, well Greg the dregs of shifter kind was not a werewolf. You have got to stop calling us that because it’s offensive. A racial slur if you will.
M’kay.
Stop fobbing me off. I’m trying to talk to you.
But brain worm, you’re freaking me out here. Shifters? Be real. Those don’t exist.
Do to! We so do. Listen, just think, Cass and don’t freak out, okay? Haven’t you asked yourself why we all refer to each other as female and male? Why I keep slipping and calling my baby a young? Why—
Honestly? And this is all me going along with my own thoughts here since you’re obviously a subconscious brain worm—
Stop!
Well, I just figured all you guys talk funny because you live so close to the middle of nowhere.
I sigh resignedly and decide to play along.
We do not. We have lots of stuff here. Just because we don’t— Let’s not get off topic here. Cass—God, I feel like that kid from Sixth Sense. Cass, this whole town is made up of shifters, a race that is human but can also change and shift into the animal we’re given. I’m a wolf. My mate is a wolf-panther. Banner is—
Dreamy.
Oh god, stop thinking sex thoughts. How can you think sex thoughts when you think I’m a goddamned brain worm? This female, God help me, her thoughts are so weird, how am I going to get through to her?
Are you still talking to me because let me be honest, it freaks me out when a part of my mind starts referring to me as a separate entity.
Then wake up! Wake up and let me prove to you that it’s true. I know it freaks you out, and I know after what that mange-infested mutt did to you that you have every right to be scared, but Cass, honey, I swear to you we are not going to hurt you. We all love you.
Er, uh, this is not…can I be honest?
Please.
I’m sorta scared. I mean, I definitely know that something’s wrong with me, but I can’t explain it.
It’s not brain worms!
I know. It just made me feel better to have an answer, even if it was wrong. And gross. What’s wrong with me then? Assuming I believe you’re you and not a…you know. And by the way, how are you talking to me? God, I am losing it!
You’re not. Stop screaming! You’re giving me a headache.
So-sorry.
Cass, we’re all shifters, just like Gregor is, except we don’t hurt humans. In fact, we try to protect you guys from our less savory element by living away from humans.
I think about that, and assuming that I believe this is Hannah I’m talking to and not a brain…thing. I can appreciate that. I mean, I can’t judge every other book cover because of one shitty story.
Really weird logic, but I’ll take it! So assuming you believe me, which you should because I’m awesome and I have this cool ability that allows me to get into people’s heads, I want to say that you’re going to be okay.
I don’t feel it.
I know. That’s because that rabid mongrel bit you and infected you with his essence.
That sounds gross. Is it gross? Should I take a Z-pack?
No, stop trying to bright side this! I’m trying to be serious. You don’t have a disease or anything. It’s just that his essence seems to be making your body react as if it’s being poisoned.
Oh. Essence? I think we should talk about that more later? But, well, okay. Then get me something to fix it, like anti-venom or…or whatever people take for poison.
Can’t yet. We don’t know why this is happening, so we don’t know what to do for you. Stop screaming! It’s fine. You’ll be fine. What we need to do is get you to wake up, so Althea can check you out and you can tell her what you feel.
I feel like shit. Tell her I feel like shit.
You tell her. Tell Banner, who is literally climbing the walls with worry.
Aaaaw, he’s so sweet and cuddly.
He’s a fucking bear-wolf mix. There is nothing cuddly about him, I assure you. And he’s out of his mind right now. Wake up, Cass. He needs you.
My mind blanks, thinking of my Banner as some big scary bear.
And wolf. He’s a wolf too. One who lets off a scent that is meant to attract you. Sound familiar? Oh, and they mark their females by rubbing all up on us. And well…sex. You’ll see what I mean.
But—
Just roll with it, Tiny, it is what it is. For now, you need to focus on getting your ass up so my brother-in-law doesn’t demolish half the clinic where I’ll need to come to give birth. God help me, I was trying not to think about that. Thanks a lot.
Hey! It’s not my fault you thought it. Besides, having babies is a gift from God.
More like a life sentence. Why can’t males do that stuff?
Well, I mean the hole on the end…
I’ll keep that image in mind while my vagina is tearing itself in two! I can’t wait to tell Logan. Now wake up!
Stop that, you’re scaring me!
Then wake up, and you won’t have to hear me snarl. By the way, good job on the dialing. Sorry I just hung up on you. I thought all that moaning was you getting head. I feel bad.
You? I thought you don’t do guilt.
I don’t. Usually. It’s the pregnancy; it’s killing my flow.
I giggle and focus on getting out of my own head, shoving against the darkness with a strength I didn’t know I have. It hurts like a bastard, no lie. With each step closer, I feel like my uterus is ripping in two and my stupid boobs are so swollen they’re like two boulders on my chest.
See why small is better? Now move it! Lync just sniffed at a tree, and I am so not into seeing if he pees on the plastic tree in the corner.
I snort, pausing when it hits me.
Is Lync…?
Yep. You got it! Only he’s like half feral because his mate was killed a few years ago and he’s only just started coming back to himself. All me. Mostly. Some is you, but still, I take the bulk of the credit since I let him out of his cage.
He was in a cage?
Well, a cell. To be fair, he was half crazed and intent on ripping everyone apart for a while so yeah, totally understandable that they locked him away for like years. You almost awake?
Almost. Just have to—
I push the rest of the way and blink my eyes open on a curse I hope no one hears. Sorry God! It just slipped out. The first thing I see is the ceiling, white, clean. The second thing, after I turn my head, is a bag with clear fluid attached to the tube in my arm.
I’m in a hospital bed, just like before, only now I feel everything, and I m
ean everything, and I do not like it. I should have remembered to take my vitamins last night when I crawled home, I think, promising myself to remember next time.
Shifting my legs over, I only register a little pain and decide that it’s better than the soul-tearing torture I felt before. I’m a little shaky on my feet but stable enough that I can walk, and I do that, making it to the door and leaning out to peer down the passage.
Okay Cass! You’re either riddled with brain-infesting, tissue-destroying worms, or you just had a conversation with your pal, in your head, and she is telling the truth and they are all shifters who become animals.
Don’t freak out. You can do this. So if you find anyone and it turns out they’re just run of the mill humans, great, uh, there has to be a pill you can take to kill worms. In your head. Gross!
If not and it turns out that you just had soul-shaking sex with a…a guy who turns into a bear—
And a wolf! Don’t forget the wolf.
I scream blue murder when Hannah’s voice pops into my head and resent the laughter that follows it, only slumping back against the wall when I hear deafening drum beats and glance to the right to see Banner running my way.
He looks so normal. I can’t believe what I’m thinking, and then he does the one thing that ensures I believe without a doubt. I think. The verdict is still out until I see teeth. He grabs me up and starts rubbing against me, sniffing, that smell I’ve come to associate with him filling the air around me.
Told ya.
Chapter Fourteen
Cass
Banner squeezes me to within an inch of my life, something I don’t complain about even if I can’t breathe because it feels so good I could suffocate happily right now.
I hug him back, my purr of delight when I smell him turning into a pout when he pulls back slightly and starts looking me over. I don’t know where the hooker in me comes from because the moment I feel hands roaming all over me I get all hot and bothered and have to calm myself down by thinking of what could be in my brain.
Mood killer.
Another mood killer is the fact that if everything I just had in my head is true, well then I am sick. I haven’t been sick a day in my life unless you count that flu I had at Hannah’s…was that the flu? Oh well, unless you count that, I have always been super healthy. The last time I felt sick was the week after Mom died, but that was just depression before I realized I can’t be sad for someone who got to go to heaven early.
Really, I count them lucky for getting out before their time was well and up. Like parole. Hmm, I wonder if Charls’ son has been paroled yet. I should call her and see if they’ve had their planned trip yet. Goodness I hope he doesn’t try to kill her again. That would break her heart.
“You’re awake! Oh God you’re awake and you look—”
He shoves me away suddenly, taking a step back, and I frown, seriously not happy when I step closer and he counters again, putting more distance between us with his longer stride.
“Banner—”
“You can’t touch me! You uh, you’re sick and uh, and you can’t risk getting an…infection if I’m carrying something,” he mumbles, flushing scarlet.
Uhuh! Now I know what he looks like when he’s trying to lie. Interesting.
Mwahahaha!
Hannah, honestly. I’m trying to be all accepting about this situation here, and you’re being weird. Besides, you’re only supposed to mwahaha twice.
Sorry. I’m an over achiever.
“Banner—?”
“You should be resting. Come on. I’ll take you back to bed. To rest! You’ve been through an ordeal, and Althea says you’re going to feel weak. You shouldn’t be walking yet. You’re pale. You need to put on more weight if you’re going to get healthy. You should, uh, God, I need to get the hell out of here. You smell amazing.”
“Thanks! I bathe often and wash my clothes,” I quip, grinning when he gapes and seems at a loss for words.
Sighing, not quite sure how I can really be standing here still having sex thoughts about a guy who is possibly an animal. Well, he’s an animal in the sack!
Happy dances in my head.
Well, I accept it. I don’t know how, but I mean come on! I can’t just judge, can I? Banner is a good person, if a little weird and large and scary sometimes. But I totally dig him for being so yummy and sweet, and all of them for being so nice when in reality they could kill indiscriminately and rid the world of all things human. And besides all that, it’s not a crime to be a…a shifter.
Just because people are different doesn’t mean they’re all bad. Or all scary. Just look at Lync, he’s supposed to be some crazed, feral-type guy, and in reality, he’s just a cuddly teddy bear inside.
As for Banner, and yeah, I focus on him again because come on, the guy is hot. And sweet. Most of the time. And we’ve already had sex. That ship has sailed. God, am I ever glad that ship sailed, and I got to feel his sex moves before I found out that he can change into an animal. That would have weirded me out, but now that I’ve already had him, well, it’s like I get to know him before I know him. Kinda like dating before…it’s a little back to front, seeing as we did have sex with him before I got to really know him, but it’s ideal in this situation really. I don’t want to judge me too harshly, but there is the slight possibility that I would have freaked out if I found out they were werewolves—
Shifters!
Fine, shifters, before I slept with him. Now, it just is. I can’t judge them for some biology thingy after all the kindness and support and awesome sex. And anyway, how foolish would it be to be freaked out when—in truth—I just love the idea of shifters. I really like the idea because it seems shifter guys really know what to do with—
Are you gonna think about the sex much longer because I am still here?
Go way then! I can sex fantasize all I want. I haven’t had sex in a while, and the sex was—
Yeah, yeah! Awesome. I get it.
Giggling, I look over at Banner and sigh, wondering if I’m crazy and totally not caring if crazy means I get to be with him. As friends. Totally as friends. Until I can prove that we are so totally perfect for each other, that is.
I want Naomi, Neve, Nathaniel, Gibb, Vivica, Marlon, and Fabiana—
Planning babies already! Huh. Still seven? Please, please do not name your kids that. We’re shifters, we’re supposed to have cool un-human names.
Er, your name is Hannah. That is totally human. In fact, I think it’s one of the most commonly used names.
My mother is a bitch with no imagination. She has an excuse. What’s your excuse? Be cooler.
I sigh, shoving her away and look at Banner with a grin. I can totally see having cute little babies, who have cool names and can turn into animals. My sense of adventure peeks her head up like a meerkat and sniffs the air as if sensing a treat.
“Banner—”
“I should get Althea!” he barks again, his whole body shaking as if he’s having trouble with his control.
Scent. Maybe he can smell my—?
That would be so embarrassing if I didn’t want him, but I do, so I take a step forward and keep going until he’s backed all the way into the waiting room where Hannah sits grinning and Lync picks up his head with a low whine.
He’s crouched in a corner, silently watching the room as if something is about to jump out at him and attack. His pants are still baggy and the shirt isn’t much better as it hangs off his shoulders. And that hair—
Ooooh, so that’s why all the hair.
“Hi!”
Everyone just stares, not quite believing my peppy mood and gapes when I walk over to Lync and reach out to touch his face. Lync doesn’t like touching, I know this, but I think we may be good enough friends for me to risk it, and besides, I feel so bad for giving him this shock that I have to do something.
“Hi, big man, you doing okay? Oh Lync, you need to eat something. What did I tell you about skipping meals?”
“Bad.”
/>
“Exactly! You’re too lean for your height. Now come on out of there. I’ll take you home and make you some ribs and potatoes,” I say, luring him out with a smile while the silence around us continues.
He finally rises from his crouch in the corner and takes my hand, his face going soft, at least I think so. I can’t quite see enough to tell, as he towers over me.
“You should be resting. Here. Where Althea can monitor you for…er…sickness!” Banner barks, coming forward before realizing what he’s doing and stopping dead.
Huh. That just will not do. He promised me sex. A lot of sex. I don’t do welching on a deal.
Later Cass, first things first.
“Look, Hannah already brain invaded me and told me the whole deal. You’re all some super-secret shifter race that can change into animals and do all kinds of cool stuff. I got that, though God knows for a minute there I was totally freaking out because I thought I had rabies. Or worms. Whatever. Shame on you all for fooling me that way. Good job though! You were all really convincing,” I say, praising them because it’s just what I do.
Logan laughs as does Bear Clarke, and Mika while Ros tuts and rubs at Denny’s face lovingly while he smiles. Nick, the “mayor” also grins, and his wife wipes at her brow mockingly, as if to say she’s glad I’m not freaking out.
“You…but…”
“Banner honestly, stop stuttering and stop moving away! We’ve already done the good good,” I admonish, grinning when he blinks and his mouth twitches.
“You’re not afraid?”
“Why would I be? Honestly? So you’re all super-werewo—I mean, shifters? So what? That’s cool. Unless you bring dead animals into your house, in which case I just refuse,” I say evenly, feeling serene when he blinks again and swallows.
“I thought you’d freak out because of…”
“Gregor? Lord no! I only freaked with him because he was all like ‘you mine, want sex, chompy, chompy, sharp teeth’,” I assure him, waving a hand through the air. “If he’d been all cool and given me a choice, I’d have said ‘Gregor, no thank you, I would not like to belong to you because you just don’t do it for me, cool teeth by the way, who’s your dentist?’”
Greyriver Shifters Page 84
